MsChar
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Joined: 10/4/2005
Msg: 26 | |
| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/4/2007 10:09:11 PM | well i guess i am an older woman .. a year older this month lol ! and now that i am with my boyfriend again I LUV sex . we continue to amaze each other in the bedroom !( or anywhere else we decide to get it on!!
PS menopause is a poor excuse to give up sex or other part of your life !!
charla | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 2:54:57 AM | The world we live in now is mainly automatic, we have something for everything. We even have toliet that wipe our butts, so can you say LAZY people?
At the end of a long day, at times, it may take effort to show affection to one another, I would say a LARGE portion take the easy slide into bed and snooze, rather than snuggle up to their partner and spend the last bit of energy they have in them.
It's to easy to throw out those words,"I'm to tired", or "not now, how about tonight". Before you know it, it has been a month, then although the effect should be two sided, someone starts to feel that tug at their emotions, BUT, nothing is said or done. Month 2 has come and gone, now the thought of resentment is building, "they don't love me, why should I put forth if they won't, and MAYBE, they are screwin around with someone else".
This whole last paragraph could be avoided if we just weren't so lazy these days. And before someone comes up with, "The world is so busy", I say BS. If you care for someone, it should be effeortless to show them, even if it's a big old bear hug. Some times actions DO speak louder then words.
Although I do believe this is not gender based, the lack of men(with the exception of a few) kind of shows me, not to many on this site willing to step forward to be heard, maybe not worth the effort, in return shows it's not an important issue. But hey, just a guess. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 5:04:22 AM |
Although I do believe this is not gender based, the lack of men(with the exception of a few) kind of shows me, not to many on this site willing to step forward to be heard, maybe not worth the effort, in return shows it's not an important issue. But hey, just a guess.
This statement along with the stupid little icon shows a bias and ignorance that SOME of the women here have tired to place upon men. FWIW I'll add my opinions and experiences with you so called mature or "older women" and what you want, what you do or don't do.
Women tend to know only about themselves and with very few exceptions do NOT know the REAL sexual interest or lack thereof with others. Yes you might share some things with one another and form a huge sweeping generalization of your own about "woman kind" but that's hardly what men discover or know about women of any age. Many, MANY women DO lose interest in sex for a variety of reasons and when they become part of a couple simply don't want to engage in it----again for a variety of reasons. Women tend to NOT know the reality of this since you don't date one another. Whatever the reason the notion that SOME women lose their desire for sex after a certain age isn't a creation of men----something along the way has caused some of us to think or know this as fact.
The women posting her know their own desires and capabilities ONLY which I think most have admitted. Also, women who post here on POF are an extreme minority of women "everywhere" and in no way represent even a slim majority of women of any age---thank god for that!! The point being SOME men have encountered more than a few women who are NOT interested in sex. If we extend that to think all women over a certain age don't care for sex simply due our own limited experience with "all women" then we're at fault. Unfortunately, we all tend to sometimes think "all men/women" are alike from only a small sampling of the whole gender.
I'll add hopefully somewhat descreetly that I had a "thing" with a neighbor who was in her later 50's when we began and she was nearly insatiable----and probably still is nearly 7 years later!! | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 5:29:58 AM | I think it's not that mature women don't like sex, it's that they like romance. I've read that men need sex to feel loved, and women need to feel loved to want sex. That's really true from my end. I lost interest in sex in my last LTR because he was non-communicative and unromantic. I did all sorts of little things for him, trying to drop a hint, but he never reciprocated. I would spend hours getting ready to go somewhere, and he wouldn't even say "you look nice". Everytime there was an occasion, he would rush out at the last minute and get the first relevant card he could find, and a gift certificate to Home Depot...don't get me wrong, I love Home Depot, but I LIVED with the man! If he had listened at all, he would have known what I wanted.
I guess mature women take longer to get turned on, especially after menopause, and we need a man who isn't so much in a rush to "do the deed" and get it over with.
Also, at my age, I'm more inclined to get to know someone very well before I jump in bed with them. Someone who comes across as just wanting sex, or wanting it very quickly after they meet you, or someone who brings sex up on the first date, is pretty much out with me.
Basically, sex should be an event, not an act, no matter how often it happens. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 6:04:19 AM | I think the suggestion that older Women don't desire sex is a complete myth.
I was married for many year's with the last 10 or so of them not very happy and I know for a fact that if harmony is not present in a relationship neither party (man or woman) will have an interest in romance, affection, or sex.
I am 60 now and was 56 when I divorced. I thought that my day's of enjoying sex we're over simply because I didn't desire sex with her. I was pleasantly suprised shortly after the split to find the fire was still there.
I have dated Women from their early 40's to their mid 60's and know for a fact that Women in their 60's have just as much desire for romance, affection, and sex as younger Women.
If two people enjoy each other's company sex will happen eventually and be blissful for both parties............ | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 6:12:24 AM |
I would like to hear from the guys why they think older woman don't like sex. Just because you were in a marriage for x number of years and your wife wasn't interested anymore doesn't mean she doesn't like sex. It simply means she was most likely bored with sex with you
I think it is more likely the wife has made herself emotionally unattached from her husband. Adults have choices. Adults take action to remediate bad situations. If sex is boring with your partner, the adult approach is to make it better. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 6:14:27 AM | JWA, granted a mature woman wouldn't say, BITE ME, nor would a mature woman state that given the personality, no wonder SOME have experienced lack of sex drive in older woman, BUT a mature woman would just consider the source and be on her way.  Icons and all
BTW, go ahead and report it, but just remember who threw the first punch... | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 6:16:10 AM |
guess mature women take longer to get turned on, especially after menopause, and we need a man who isn't so much in a rush to "do the deed" and get it over with.
I will be 52 soon... In recent years I have dated women my age and older. The above quoted statement you make, in my experience, I have found to be very untrue. Mature women, seem to be more "ready to rumble" then I have been. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 6:42:20 AM | Also, women who post here on POF are an extreme minority of women "everywhere" and in no way represent even a slim majority of women of any age---thank god for that!! The point being SOME men have encountered more than a few women who are NOT interested in sex. If we extend that to think all women over a certain age don't care for sex simply due our own limited experience with " all women" then we're at fault.
Also, men who post here on POF are an extreme minority of men " everywhere" and in no way represent even a slim majority of men of any age---thank god for that!! The point being SOME women have encountered more than a few MEN who are ONLY INTERESTED in sex. If we extend that to think that all men over a certain age care ONLY about sex simply due to our limited experience with " all men" then we're at fault.
Unfortunately, we all tend to sometimes think " all men/women" are alike from only a small sampling of the whole gender.
This is so true...............
Isn't is a crying shame, that we allow a few misguided individuals with misguided opinions and sweeping generalizations about the opposite gender, to colour our perspectives about dating/relationships and sex at our age?
..........Peace.
I know, I know!!!!!.................. I had to add a stupid litttle icon......
Muskoka | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 7:52:20 AM |
I think it's not that mature women don't like sex, it's that they like romance. I've read that men need sex to feel loved, and women need to feel loved to want sex.
Every now and then you read something like this in a forum and it just makes you want to cry! How perfectly stated........and sincerely honest!
Well Done.
Cya!
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 10:13:48 AM |
I would like to hear from the guys why they think older woman don't like sex.
Just curious as to what study was done that has made you to come to this conclusion?
Maybe you should do a poll..
You may just be surprised at the results... | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 11:14:30 AM | msg.21
It's the poor boys who imagine (I wonder why?) for some reason that we don't, that I worry about.
I have to admit, how a thread like this gets started and posted on is a mystery to me. Doesn't everyone like sex ?? Yeah, I know ... it's not nice to have it pushed down your throat, if you'll pardon the (cough, cough) expression, but among consenting adults ... I mean, geez ... even the dog's latching on to my leg at this time of year.
If one person who's been intimate with another, now doesn't want sex, then there is a problem, and it's pretty-well guaranteed that the problem has nothing to do with the former not wanting or liking sex. The two people talk about it -- or use sign language, or smoke signals, or send e-mails to each other (whatever works for the two people) -- find out what the problem is, then take steps to solve it. But mature women not wanting sex ?? Surely there’s no one reading this that has given any weight to that absurd generality. And it would seem that the gentlemen who have gone 'missing' on this thread feel the same.
cdn guy | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 11:30:48 AM |
I still think older mature women are a real turn on!!!
Thank you! My personal experience has been that after I passed 40, my libidinous urges increased dramatically. I had a man tell me this would happen and I didn't believe it could possibly get any better than it was when I was 25 - he said "Just wait! You'll see!"
If one person who's been intimate with another, now doesn't want sex, then there is a problem, and it's pretty-well guaranteed that the problem has nothing to do with the former not wanting or liking sex.
Once again, right on point. Communication can be quite an aphrodisiac. Try that.
As we women mature, we are no longer concerned with making babies and all that stuff. It means we are free to enjoy all the sex we want without fear of pregnancy and more kids. It was actually kind of liberating!
I admit it - I am nearly 59. I am probably healthier and sexier than I ever was as a youngster. Thank GOD there is some3thing to look forward to besides a rocking chair! | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 2:15:01 PM | What guy thinks older women don't like sex ?, I am sorry for him, experience is bliss.  | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 3:22:09 PM | It has been my experience that older women do not want to have sex...................................with me. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 6:30:30 PM | | "Older"" women who have experienced tremendous sex (e.g. G-spot orgasm) DO want sex. I experienced a G-spot orgasm long after the end of my long marriage, but never in my marriage. After 20 years I was still willing, but just not as interested. And I was very, very busy with my job and kids. I was way too busy and my ex-husband was way-too busy with his job and hobbies. My ex-husband chose to solve the problem (my lack of interest after 20 years with no satisfaction) with affairs with both married and single women in our community. I chose not to stay with him for the betrayals (sexual and financial). I would never have left him because the sex was boring! I loved him for the person he was and I loved our family. Marriage is a LIFETIME committment, and that comes first. I wish I had known long ago what I know now--and that is how to teach my lover how to satisfy ME sexually, so that we would BOTH be satisfied in our lovemaking. But the bottom line is, marriage is a lifetime committment, and one of the marriage partners should never seek "help" from a someone wanting to offer their sexual services. My ex did this. He eventually dumped her, married a nice younger woman, and became a father AGAIN at age 50. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 9:41:02 PM | As usual... this is a thread....about relationship skills trying to be labeled about sex. Everyone wants sex. Everyone likes sex. Can we just aggree on that... for once? ha!
People lose interest in sex in relationships because one, or both, have become negligent...(or ignorant) in basic relationships skills . Sex is the 'acting out' of people who are getting their real needs met. We should be figuring this stuff out at our ages. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/5/2007 10:03:04 PM | See I get accused of being something of a prude in that I rarely talk sex with women.
I just feel awkward talking to someone else about my needs. That and I want to connect to women on many different levels and interests.
But I do love a woman to be sexy and I dont think older women arent sexy. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/7/2007 1:38:50 PM | Alright...I don't get some of you people. First off, the OP is NOT imo "an older woman!" Niether are you "spring light." An "older woman" is like "Marsha!" (god bless her). So enough of the "older woman" B.S.
Secondly, there are more 40 and 50 year olds on the particular site, than I have ever seen! So CLEARLY men DON'T think this of so-called "older women." If we did...we wouldn't be here, because nobodys knows better than we "older men", that the chances of us hooking up with a 20 or 30 year old, are about the same as Mike Tyson being heavyweight champion again. Remeber him ladies?
Listen, I'm a people watcher....and one night I was out with the guys, and noticed an "older woman" in her early 40's, going from one guy to the next. She wasn't drunk, and I thought she was very attractive (my buddies didn't). But I noticed one thing...her libito was pumping at full steam! If she went home alone that night, their would be hell to pay with this woman the next day!
Trust me....we "older men", know full well, that you "older women" require it, need it, want it, and most of all....love to share it!
Gawd I love you "older" but "attractive" women!.....
Ricky | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/7/2007 2:14:40 PM | | Hmm I think maybe Ron hit a nail on the head. Maybe the guys give up at the first sight of menopause, and forget to go back and check once in a while. | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/7/2007 5:21:33 PM | | Hiya Ricky, Ty for posting lol. I left you a message last night on that thread we were talking on , when I looked it was deleted lmao. What is "OP"? | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/7/2007 5:34:52 PM | Hi Sweet45 -
It didn't get "deleted." I left you a little present there...and "OP" means...original poster | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/7/2007 5:43:37 PM | | I can't find it...maybe they banned me | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/7/2007 5:52:42 PM | I got to go play a pool tournament. Lock the door on that thread til I get back  | |
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| Mature Woman
Posted: 5/7/2007 6:00:34 PM | "I got to go play a pool tournament. Lock the door on that thread til I get back"
_____________________
Oh wonderful...dumped by another poolstick! When will it ever end?.... | |
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