|
|
|
|
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 3:12:41 PM | | Yes, this happens and is quite common. They are called first, second, and third string booty calls. Also quite common is the situation where you have girls you sleep with, but a second tier of girls who want you to "wait" to save face or whatever. You sleep with the first tier while the second tier incubates. When they are ready they move to the first tier and can tell their friends they made you wait to save face. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 3:25:13 PM |
this book sounds like a good idea.
Personally I believe that all relationship books are BS. If they really worked then you would only need one. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 3:32:03 PM | | dreamer, Thanks for giving me the idea that you're too used to men who play you, but who then bench you if you don't play along. I am a monogamous man who's not into montonous. No games other than friendly competition ...and keeping a woman on her toes besides 'dancing' horizontally. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 3:50:26 PM |
So, if she's on a rotation, it triggers her need to be approved, and therefore compete. If she ditches this guy, she loses his approval. So she'll try even HARDER to go for the ***hole. Do you believe this theory is true?
There are some people who would rather have negative attention than no attention at all. It's sad but true.
But other than the "Buy my book!" message, this book sounds like a good idea.
I read books in reference to relationships with an open mind. Hence my question in this thread. The author gives some good advice - some of her ideas and opinions don't sit well with me. The book in itself is entertaining and written with humor. Just like some of the threads in forums - some are entertaining, some are humorous and some not to be taken seriously. Some posts are not to be dignified with responses. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 11:00:49 PM |
hmmm.... your clairvoyance and psychic abilities aren't doing so well, iago, I've only had 2 sexual relationships - one was my musician husband and the other was my musician LTR of 6 yrs. Music is a large part of my life. Having been married to ONE musician a lot of my friends are musicians - both males and females - ALL are non-sexual friends.
Ok, Ok... maybe it wasn't clairvoyance, but muddledvoyance.... but you gotta admit, I got the hangin' out with muscians part correct.
... did you ever see any of the musician guys with line ups of women to support the theory you mentioned? | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 11:17:25 PM | | Line up? I can't even get a line to form. But then again I'd never do that...because I wouldn't want to be caught in such a tangled web that could lead to bigger problems. I've never had the luxury have having a phone book of women's names and dating them on a rotation cycle. So...guess I'm no help in this little theory going on. I'll let others that have a rotating door installed answer that instead. | |
|
e-wok
|
Joined: 9/25/2006
Msg: 32 | |
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 11:31:21 PM | It was easier when I was in my 20's to pull that....a McHappy Meal and you're
good to go LOL But today, if I had a roster of women including the bench
warmers waiting to be called in to play, I'd go broke.
BTW: the second-stringers......if they were indeed showing deep feelings -
would likely be cut from the roster when all you are looking for is sex but
then again there are some dudes who have no empathy and play them. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 11:38:41 PM | Are you kidding me? Heck, I treat women like fantasy football--just pick the ones who I think will do well, create a starting lineup, then see what happens!!! From week to week, just like fantasy football, there's always one who will score and score more than once. (By the way, what I just wrote is entire BS!)
What the heck are you talking about OP? Do you really think that all men treat women like some sort of rotisserie? If this is what you really think men do, then I suggest you switch teams. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/5/2007 11:56:49 PM | I am lucky to end up with one girl at a time. If I ever found a line of girls I'd think I was standing in the group heading to the ladies room.
As for tht get mindblowing sex. I have never dated a girl and had mind blowing sex. So if it ever happened to me they'd probably bury me with a happy smile on my face.
Seriously, if I think they are going to give me sex long before we become friends or more. I vanish. My Ex loved to have sex with people she didn't know. So I don't want to ever date a woman that was like my Ex. I'll do without sex before I chance STD's.
And I'll regret it every time, but I stand by my values. Of course I only been offered raw sex twice in my life. Not like I get oppertunity to test my resolve daily. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 12:25:04 AM | Ok, that fantasy football thing was funnier n hell, Summer Teeth...do the ladies still (ahem) fumble the ball even in fantasy football though? 
I wonder how many girls ask the guys they’re currently sexually involved with if they are also currently involved sexually with other women.
I've asked every man that I've ever been intimate with, that exact question, so here's one girl answering that. I must have only dated old-fashionedly though, because I've never slept with a man that wasn't committed to me only.
I don’t think it’s prying or rude to ask the guys you’re sleeping with about the competition you’re up against to find out the odds of contacting STDs or getting actual commitments from them – IF - that’s what you want.
I agree...it's never rude to ask a man about his sexual history, where diseases are concerned....in fact, I've always done so myself. Again though...Bucsgirl said it perfectly already....I also never slept with men that were pitting me against any 'competition'.
Maybe I've just been lucky all this time but....I've always found, any man I've ever dated wasn't playing a rotation, or any other sort of game. If he was, I would have just moved on....BEFORE sleeping with him. ;)
| |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 1:05:22 AM | A multi-tiered LINEUP of women?!?!? WTF?!?! Where can I get one of those????? 
Personally, I am thinking that it is only the world's hottest men who can get and keep something like that together.
Any guy even close to average isn't going to be able to put together a 'Lineup' unless he has absolutely no standards at all beyond 'Any living human female.' Even then, probably not. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 1:45:08 AM |
What the heck are you talking about OP? Do you really think that all men treat women like some sort of rotisserie? If this is what you really think men do, then I suggest you switch teams.
Ohhh for the love of all that is holy!! Don't you people read?!?!?!? Obviously you do.... my question should be - Don't you people comprehend, which, btw, means understand what you read?!?!?!?
This was not my theory.... It is the theory of the author of a book I was reading..... My thread is a question asking guys if they use a rotation method for girls who are willing sexual partners!!
SHEESH!!! Based on the rude, hurtful and insulting remarks to demean my character instead of just answering the question posed, by simply saying no, you don't use a dating rotation or saying yes you know of some men who do use it - I have no choice but believe the reason for such ignorance is I didn't word the thread and the question in a way that even the intellectually challenged would not misinterpret. I do apologize for misjudging you.
Out of all the guys who posted to this thread only 2 or 3 actually understood that this thread is not an accusation, but a mere "poll", so to speak. To those few, I must say your input is appreciated. I'll have to email Lauren Frances, the author of the book that led me to think it would be a good idea to bring subject at hand to the forums for discussion, to tell her my findings showed the majority of men who responded disagreed with her theory. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 1:48:12 AM | I am not even sure what the question being asked is.
Lineup? Romantic rotation? The hell?
I have never had anything resembling a lineup.
Women are crazy enough as it is, why would I want more than one? Also, each has different likes and dislikes. Trying to keep straight which one likes what would be way too tiresome.
Maybe it is because I am "lazy," but I don't want variety. I am perfectly happy having the same flavor for the rest of my life.
However, I doubt the male users of this forum are representative of men in general.
-GG | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 2:14:47 AM | Out of all the guys who posted to this thread only 2 or 3 actually understood that this thread is not an accusation, but a mere "poll", so to speak. To those few, I must say your input is appreciated. I'll have to email Lauren Frances, the author of the book that led me to think it would be a good idea to bring subject at hand to the forums for discussion, to tell her my findings showed the majority of men who responded disagreed with her theory.
Please ask her what the approximate percentage of men is who do this. I'm curous. I've known about 5 in my life, and every single one was a grade-A scumbag. Actually, sociopath is a more fitting description. Not joking.
Dating, Mating and Manhandling a Sociopath. I'd buy that book.
But seriously, in my opinion, it's rare. I don't see that kind of thing very often. But, these types tend to have a lot of women, so I guess it's possible a lot of women run into this rare breed. Or, are attracted/attracting to this type. Which the book may cover.
I think it's a bit misandrous to label men this way though. (And many of us are sick and tired of the bullshit misandry that's so ok to use and are begining to backlash against it.) Those aren't "men" as a whole. They're exceptions. And a small exception at that. And I think that's why some feathers are being ruffled. | |
|
JWA
|
Joined: 5/21/2005
Msg: 40 | |
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 5:25:20 AM | Well apart from this post being almost total BS I really, REALLY love these sorts of added replies:
The reason I posted this thread is because I read a book by Lauren Francis titled "Dating Mating and Manhandling" . One of the chapters is "The Male String Theory of Dating". I just wanted guy's views on her theory. Perhaps I should have mentioned that in my thread.
Yeah----doncha think MAYBE that little bit of info might have netted you more acutal answers instead of all the other replies? It's fricking hilarious when someone posts something in haste leaving out what are pertinent facts but then getting incensed the post seems to run off topic.
OP if you read books on relationships instead of attempting to establish one you'll get nowhere fast. This stuff about you hanging out with musicians really doesn't figure in since they're nothing more than people with a different sort of job or skill. (I've been a musician and know what I'm talking about here) Sorry to say they do have a flakey bend and no matter how cool or whatever you think they are many of them are known to not take any sort of committed relationship seriously. This goes for the boys and the girls. If you try telling me that's not true you're wasting your time----I know it IS true. That's hardly the topic here and we all have our preferences anyway.
If you're going to quote or parrot some drivel from the latest "relationship cure all" then you might want to state your case a bit more clearly. The responses you received were based almost entirely on your opening post which you seem to dismiss or not realize. Don't get pissy when you create the very misunderstanding you've created!!! | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 6:25:18 AM | dreamer, Your OP starts off w/ "there's a school of thought" that is actually one book written by a Ph.D. w/ a "Double-D" and whose website is more a portal into pay-for-in-theory promise. My guess is that if men will pay for porno, why not set up a similar racket for women and romance?
While attending another university and learning that too many who teach at these "schools of thought" go this career route because reality is too much for their egos to bear, I understand the racket too well. Many professors make most of their money authoring the textbooks that they require students enrolled in their classes to buy at some ridiculously inflated price. It's called 'fleecing the sheep' and it's mostly wool they pull over our eyes for a 'formal education'. BTW, where did the author earn her degree in Romance ...and is her "Double-D" natural or augmented?
I was married to a Ph.D., am happier divorced from her, and want nothing more w/ twisted intellect and an inability to empathize. It comes w/ the territory. As for Lauren Frances's 'esteemed POV', this man is completely turned off by the term, "manhandle" ...as it implies even more extreme pretense and manipulation. In closing, I suggest doing more research into the source for whatever 'self-help cookbook' may come onto the market ...in order to fulfill the flights of fantasy for those who've had their hearts dashed by so-called "players". That fact is that they only need to look in the mirror as they primp and preen for a date to recognize that it takes a player to bring this quality out in others. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 6:49:47 AM | I'm not sure how many guys in my age group have a romantic rotation with their girls, but I suspect it would be more of an online thing than 'real world'.
If I got taken off the pitcher's mound and put into the bullpen for another star player, I would try harder to perfect my pitch and work my way back to starting position.
If I was delegated to the minors for other players, I would probably be heading to the golf course!
I do ask if they are being intimate with others and for the most part, they have been honest with me. (I think)! | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 6:53:39 AM | Dreamer,
First I want to thank you for directing us to the website of a woman who lists herself as a Ph Double D. It definitely got my attention! Would that be considered as affecting my feathers?
Reading what I could, I felt she is about "how to play the game". Guys are doing it, so you need to know how to also. I've heard what women typically do expressed as girls want to believe in the dream, and view guys actions in that light. I'm sure others can present other descriptions.
However you express it, the notion of "don't give up the sex till you've got'em" dominates. The idea a woman who knowingly has sex with a man who has told her ahead of time is not exclusive is something that puts that woman in a group by herself, deserving of any scorn thrown her way. A lot of people would say there must be something wrong with a woman who knowingly does that.
I believe it gets back to knowing yourself and what you want. If you only want monagomous sex, then only have monagomous sex. If you decide to have sex before commitment, then maybe the question to ask is. "Is this what I really believe? Or is this what 'everyone' tells me to believe?" When your intrinsic values are on the line, sticking to them is easy. When the extrinsic values you are supposed to have are on the line, following them is much harder.
"I like sex, and if I like you, I'll have sex on the first date." How much derision will a man have to bear if he says something along these lines? How many think this attitude means he lacks respect for himself? How about a woman?
As long as dating is a game to be played, often with sex as the prize, the rules will be important. Not the rules of the people, the rules of the game. And confusion and anxiety abound when you are worried about the rules of the game, and not your own rules.
If monagomous sex is important to you, why should the fact men want non-monagomous sex make any difference at all? Once that becomes apparent, stop seeing them. If you come back with here is my list of constraints, and there are no men that fit all the constraints, then that's the reality of life. Either you stick to your guns, or reconsider what's really important to you. Or there's always my favorite, "Why can't men just be {whatever I'm looking for}"
As Lily Tomlin said "The problem with winning the rat race is, you're still a rat." I think women (and men) would be better served by improving themselves, understanding themselves, and following their own rules, then learning how to play the game better.
Bob | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 7:16:57 AM | | Well, dreamer, let me add myself to that growing number in your poll that disagree with her theory. Most of us out here are lucky to be juggling 2 women while dating, let alone have a "starting rotation" with a "bullpen" in the event that one of the starters drops out or fails. I'm one of those who fall in the "most of" category. I'm actually uncomfortable doing a juggling act, one at a time's enough to handle. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 8:22:45 AM | I don't know any men with a "little black book".
Most guys I know will see a woman once, and then never again.
Or they'll go out with a woman once, and sometimes she'll let him go back, but it's usually on her terms.
Yes, we do have women who we'll date if no-one better is available. But we can't guarantee that she'll be up for us then. It's just a question of who is the best available at the time.
I know a guy who saw 6 women at once, but he never kept them "on rotation", as you put it. He was just seeing 6 different women at the same time. Different woman on a different night.
I think you overplay the "player" thing.
I know women who try and play these games far more than men.
Men usually are more interested in the new, and the "one we haven't met yet", rather than "the one we had that was good".
Men who are really confident tend to believe that there's always another great woman to date out there. They'd rather have that.
Don't mean to generalise.
Just my experience.
By the way, I'm a 1-woman man myself. If I'm into someone, I want to keep seeing her, no-one else. Otherwise, I move on. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 9:01:59 AM |
Who is this author and what makes her an expert?
Hey, she is highly credentialed, she has a Ph Double-D!
The first warning sign to me was the title of her tome, "Dating Mating and Manhandling", just what someone needs to suggest to women, that they have to "manhandle" men. below is the editorial review off of Amazon.com by Publisher's Weekly:
Editorial Reviews
From Publishers Weekly
Frances, a columnist for Flaunt magazine, describes herself as a dating expert with a Ph.Double-D. This sets the tone for the rest of her first book, an awkward amalgamation of wink-wink, nudge-nudge teen magazine articles on how to get a boyfriend and more brazen guides to dating and sex. Using a clever classification system that equates men with birds, she presents several dozen types, from the "Clay Pigeons" who "won't take the hint to buzz off" to the "Baldheaded Eagle" who is "bossy, controlling, and pervy, in a very good or completely pathetic kind of way." The rest of Frances's book, split into sections on dating, sex and couple-hood, thinly disguises inane clichés about dating as rules: "If a man has taken your phone number, but he's also managed to slip you his, you must always wait for him to call you. Period," and "although men should be on time, women are always allowed to be a little late." This field guide to men is best taken as a lightly humorous guide.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
To address the OP: No, I do not have a "rotation" of women, it is hard enough to meet one, and it is way too expensive to try to date 4, 5, or 6 women simultaneously. I always thought that women automatically had the "rotation" of men. Apart from the several men they date to get free dinners and drinks during the week, women like to keep a rotation often consisting of:
The man who buys them gifts
The man who pays a "few bills" for them
The man who takes her out to dinner
The man who drives her on her errands
The man who takes her on vacation with him
The man she goes to the club/bar with
etc... | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 10:29:42 AM | Ohhhh . . . finally some intelligent feed back!! Thank you - Thank you-Thank you!!
It's heartening that all the guys disagreed with France's theory and basically prefer to have only one woman to spend time with. I, myself, have to admit I know of only one guy who has 3 or 4 women he "sees" regularly. A "rotation", if you will. Whether or not they are aware of each other I have no idea. Yes, he admittedly is an a** hole -in his own words. It's my guess the poor scumsucker just can't help himself and must have lion's share of adoration.
I know a guy who saw 6 women at once, but he never kept them "on rotation", as you put it. He was just seeing 6 different women at the same time. Different woman on a different night.
hmmm... now that puzzles me.... how could seeing 6 women at once not be considered a rotation? A different woman on a different night? I'm sure I'll be corrected if I'm mistaken, but to me that is a perfect example of a rotation 
noirobsidian... I really appreciate that you shared the Editorial Review from Publishers Weekly!
This field guide to men is best taken as a lightly humorous guide. as I stated earlier, the book is humorous and entertaining - especially the author's idea of equating men with birds. I've only ever heard of some men - and I emphasize the word "some"- referred to as dogs. The author's opinion is that it is a mistake to equate some men to dogs because dogs are faithful , can be housebroken, taught new tricks and no matter what, always happy to see you! Now, c'mon people ya gotta admit that is really funny!!
Jamieberry's msg 42 - thanks Jamie - your post was also very funny I like your sense of humor!! Finally some levity!! | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 10:55:36 AM | Side note:
Since noirobsidian addressed the last part of his post to me allow me to respond to his following quote:
I always thought that women automatically had the "rotation" of men. Apart from the several men they date to get free dinners and drinks during the week, women like to keep a rotation often consisting of:
The man who buys them gifts
The man who pays a "few bills" for them
The man who takes her out to dinner
The man who drives her on her errands
The man who takes her on vacation with him
The man she goes to the club/bar with
etc...
The man who buys them gifts ---- the last man to buy me a gift was Santa Claus and he forgot my birthday
The man who pays a "few bills" for them---- omg!! ya mean there are men that actually do that?!?! And they aren't ex's who pay alimony????
The man who takes her out to dinner---- ok, ok, I'll admit I do get taken out to dinner sporatically. Sushi dinners and Italian seafood dinners!! yummmm!!
The man who drives her on her errands---- nope and I have the gas bills to prove it.
The man who takes her on vacation with him---- vacation?? what's that?? Oh wait... I AM going on a 7-day cruise in Sept with 7 other female friends - My first real vacation in 6 yrs but I'm paying my own way.
The man she goes to the club/bar with---- not since the LTR... besides I have so much fun with girls night out!!
hmmm.... maybe having 6 guys on rotation for different duties (see above) ain't such a bad idea after all..... ahhh but wait.... then I'd have to grant them sexual favors..... lemme think about it - NOT - I've been doing fine on my own - why make that drastic change ? I'd most certainly regret it! | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 11:16:16 AM |
Guys…
There’s a school of thought that many single guys actually use a romantic rotation of the girls they date. How many of you have a starting lineup of girls you date thinking or knowing you’ll have mind-blowing sex with and then a second string of girls who like you just a little more than you like them that you keep in a holding pattern waiting on the sidelines.
Girls….
Men don’t feel any guilt about the rotation method and rightfully so because, after all, they’re not married or not in a committed relationship. I wonder how many girls ask the guys they’re currently sexually involved with if they are also currently involved sexually with other women.
I don’t think it’s prying or rude to ask the guys you’re sleeping with about the competition you’re up against to find out the odds of contacting STDs or getting actual commitments from them – IF - that’s what you want.
If asked I wonder how many guys are honest with their answers.
There's a school of thought that 20% of the guys are having sex with 80% of the women. This theory kinda supports that.
The idea is that you have 80% of the guys who are 'average' in terms of how good they are with women and/or how much they tend towards sleeping with as many as possible. These will say "Rotation? I can't even get one girl!" (plenty in this thread). The other 20% sure as hell are more likely to stay quiet (or, unless they are extremely good at it, likely not be on the internet in the first place). But they're the ones that will have enough girls on the go that they can do this. And it DOES happen.
Since 80% of the girls date those 20% of the guys, you will probably find that most girls have been at some point, or even several times (though they may not know it) sleeping with a guy who is sleeping with several other girls. Hence 'All men are players!' and 'why can't I find an honest man?'. | |
|
| Do guys have a starting lineup of girls?
Posted: 5/6/2007 11:19:32 AM | | Yep, I have this great fantasy where all the three hundred pound offensive linemen of the Chicago Bears are hot babes....... it's my favorite starting lineup :D | |
|
|
| Page 2 of 6
|
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 |
|
Home
login 
