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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/9/2007 1:25:31 AM |
Can a non-Christian help you spiritually, or will they gradually pull you down?
At least the non-Christians do not run the same risk of becoming a "fallen angel" by trying to save so many sinners in the hell!   | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/9/2007 2:43:17 AM | (This note written to someone seeking communication with me at pof)
Dear One, thanks for your note... i did not see from your long list of interests, anything about your faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ...that you have made following Him, loving Him, knowing Him more, or serving Him a priority in your life... Being a follower of Christ is not a generic title, such as "Christian" or some kind of badge of being a good or moral person...(all people are sinners by nature) A follower of Christ is a heartfelt, well thought, purposeful choice, of making Him the Center, the Forgiver and the Master of our life.. that is what He meant by calling Himself the title...."Lord"... you mentioned diamonds, caviar, sports cars, travel,money, sucess, these things are nice of course.. but they are only temporary..... it is the heart and soul of man, his passions, what drives him, His values, His vision, what is the focus of his life that is important to share in common, and what ultimately lasts forever
..... My profile states i am looking for a mature follower of Christ,to serve Him and to share my life with .... it would be difficult, disharmonious, and completely unfulfilling to say the least,(as well as disobedient to God) to not be able to share the same passions for church involvement, music ministry, evangelism, world missions, Bible Study, Prayer, to have a shared love and worship for the One who loves us and died to pay for our sins... We do not appear to have any of these things in common....
. i do pray that you find what you are searching for... Jesus Himself said..."I am the way, the truth and the life.. and no one comes to the Father except through ME"...The Bible, John 14:6 .....was Jesus, narrow minded,bigoted,exclusive or fanatical???
Blessings and prayers for you....Lou Ann
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/10/2007 1:35:01 AM | As I recall from 2nd year pysch, studies show the 2 main ingredients for a lasting marriage are 1) Attraction and 2) Shared values. Since the Bible admonishes to build your house on rock, without the shared values surely you'd be building it on sand? People can be Chistian without a lot of Bible knowledge. But, if church attendence is part of your committment to Christ, shouldn't you be turning to the scriptures for guidence instead of a non-religious based chat forum??
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/10/2007 11:23:11 AM |
I find it odd that a non-christian would date a christian. I know I couldn't.
In my situation, I'd pretty much have to give up on dating anybody if I felt that way, as my Faith (Baha'i) makes up only about 1/10 of 1% of the worlds population...as long as the person I was with could respect my spiritual path, I could return the favor-but the minute someone tries to judge or convert me, I'm gone! | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 1:06:16 AM | | Keep love and religion seprate. Finding it odd to see a non- christian date a christian.?? And it depends if the non christian has a religion period.. If not then they are to be less judgemental and are more into your qualities and not who you bow down too (Worship)... They know how to keep love and religion seprated.. And will support you descisions but dont push your beliefs onto them. If they come around they have to one their own. Force it it will horribly have a bad outcome. Being you may end up losing the best thing that walked into your existence... Listen to your heart... People in your ear telling you one way or another arent always looking for your best interest. Most dont understand and people fear what they dont know and not understand. And May give the wrong advice.. | |
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cgisme
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Joined: 2/14/2007
Msg: 132 | |
| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 3:07:14 AM | I have my beliefs. Unconventional and do not necessarily mean they are the same as anyone elses. I have no problem dating someone who is a believer as long as they don't try forcing what they believe down my throat.
Good luck OP... you can only do what you feel is right for you. | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 4:05:39 AM | The word " Christian " means a multitude of different shades of beliefs.
There are Catholics, Orthodox, Lutherans, Baptists, Episcopalians, Anglicans, and many many more. All of these are Christian but they all are very sensitive to their own differences.
The right wing fundamentalists have tried to hijack the word and apply it to themselves in the same way we think of Jews or Muslims or Hindus.
Fundamentalism, as it is practiced is more of a political viewpoint than a truly religious one. The fundamentalists have tried to ply political sympathy by making claims like Christians are discriminated against. Christians discriminated against in the U.S.A. ?
Frankly, I'm not just real sure what a Christian is.
I can't say I've ever really known anyone who ever gave Christ's teachings a real try.
Jesus is probably the most ignored character in all Christendom. Notice how the fundamentalists will quote from all over the Bible, but they almost avoid the actual words of Jesus himself. Jesus was far too radical and forgiving for most of them to stomach. There is little political influence or money to be made from a philosophy of
" love thy neighbor ". | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 6:18:48 AM | | I really don't think there is much of an issue here. Sooner or later the non-believer will be asked to change or else, and then the problem solves its self. Seems to me the real question is why would a non-believer try to have a relationship with some one is eventually going to try to change them and make them more acceptable? | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 8:27:42 AM |
I really don't think there is much of an issue here. Sooner or later the non-believer will be asked to change or else, and then the problem solves its self. Seems to me the real question is why would a non-believer try to have a relationship with some one is eventually going to try to change them and make them more acceptable?
Are you serious???? Because I'm a "non-believer" I'm unacceptable? If someone loves me it's for who I am and what I have to offer the relationship. Love should not be based on the fact that I'm Jewish. Last time I checked the Jewish people are the chosen ones, right?
I can understand that dating someone of the same religion will make it easier when kids come in the picture, but I have SEVERAL friends that grew up with 2 religions. When they were old enough they could decide what path they wanted to take, and that right there my friends is LOVE. | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 9:32:50 AM | | Its well known that non christians are immoral. Immoral woman really don't care one way or the other who she does. Therefore from a point of view of getting head or whatever ...a christian would be wise to get with a non-christian. | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 1:50:13 PM | *I have not read ALL 6 pages...so if this is a repeat I do apologize. I am short on time*
What kind of dilemmas would I face in the future if I married a non Christian? Can a non-Christian help you spiritually, or will they gradually pull you down?
It all depends on who they are as a person and who YOU are too. If you believe what your friend wrote then I would say that anybody outside of your scope of religion would be one to pull you down. That fact that you ask makes me wonder. Escpecially when you state this:
It's easy to compromise your standards and beliefs in order to stay appealing to that person, but is that really being true to yourself?
This is not being true to yourself nor to this person-in esscence you are showing a fake face to this person; how fair is that to them?
If it compromises your beliefs in any way then you are in the wrong place with the wrong person.
I wish you luck hun but honestly if it were me and it compromised my beliefs...well you can ask anybody that even remotely knows me: I don't go there. It is not fair to me or to that person and it is not worth the grief it would bring down on my life in the end. Good luck OP  | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 3:23:38 PM | | WtF does religion have to do with morality..?.. I myself have met totally none religious women that have more morals then any Christian I ever seen. Religion dont base one what standards you have for yourself. Immorality comes in all forms and shapes no matter if Christian Non-Christian or the DgFs I used Accronyms cause swearing is immoral but wait I am not any religion hmm imagine that... | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/11/2007 10:46:34 PM | PL it all depends on your beliefs and what you have been taught. Most christians are taught that if you do not follow that path you are immoral. If you reference the bible that will back that up quite a bit. Some are to an anal degree in their belief while others put no real creadance (sp) in it.
If you look outside the scope of christianity at Wiccan/Druidry and what some Pagan's believe it is BASED on your morals. So while for some this statement might make a lot of sense:
WtF does religion have to do with morality..?..
My first reaction was "well DUH! Only EVERYTHING!" lol but then I remembered that most do not equate it with what my beliefs are. I'm sitting here laughing, not at you mind you, just at how different we all are in this world of ours.
To the Poster that is Jewish, dont let the other poster that made that comment get to you. If YOU know who and what you are deep down then whom cares what anybody else thinks? They do not have to look at you each morning/day/evening and eventually meetup at whatever "end" you believe in to have your day of Justice. If you know you are good then when that day comes whomever your Diety is and what you have done IS ALL that matters. (Hope that made sense lol was trying to sound politically correct and I am.... well not too literate on the Jewish Religion so hope it I hit it somewhat close to the mark there. I tried. Please correct me if I am wrong. :) ) | |
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ray51
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Joined: 4/29/2007
Msg: 142 | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/13/2007 6:38:13 PM | OP, when you wrote "It's easy to compromise your standards and beliefs in order to stay appealing to that person" the alarms went off. Never, ever compromise yourself simply to be more appealing to someone else. Rather, find someone else that you can be true to yourself with first and foremost.
No, I am not a christian, though I have been involved with a christian community for several years now through my ex wife and her relations. If you read that last sentence you will see that it did not work out. I shudder to think that my next relationship might involve another christian.
Good luck and remember to be true to yourself. | |
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libbyv
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Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 144 | |
| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/13/2007 6:56:32 PM | I dated a non christian man years ago. Obviously it didn't work out. He didn't share my beliefs and we didn't have anything in common.
The man in my life has to accept me the way I am or he can hit the highway. | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/15/2007 3:29:35 PM | | Emma that is a acceptance issue that depends on the person not his religion.. A non christian can accept a christian for who they are.. I do it all the time.. Just be you all I ever asked of anyone and let me be me... | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/15/2007 7:24:49 PM | | "Why can't I ever find anyone that I won't have issues with down the road." ??? Any long term relationship will have issues that come up. There is a big difference between someone who attends church and someone who is spiritual. The term "Christian" means different things to different people. Relegion can be a giant quagmire if you are not careful. | |
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| Thoughts on dating a non Christian. What to do?
Posted: 5/15/2007 9:02:08 PM | Hi I am born again christian which it seems you are also,I to feel I should not date non christians,but one thing I know I do not think it would work I have tried it,I was a christian when i met my husband,he said he believed would not mind going to church etc,on our wedding day he made a commitement i did not tell him to do this,but it was false,or it looks that way now,he came to church about 4 times,was never interested to know anything read the bible etc,he did not mind me going to church etc.I had a daughter with him,she is 10 now,he has let her come to church a few times,but on alot of occasions he has made excuses not for me to take her,this saddens me a lot,I am not with him now seperated,and me being christian find it hard to divorce him,I do go to stay with him as he lives at other end of country,my daughter is with him because of circumstances,school etc,although I am praying she will be with me soon. Now he turns round throws all sorts of questions at me,why would God allow this and that,I do not say much to him,well I cant get a word in anyway,he says there is no God,but believes about Jesus,like i said I cant explain to him,as he is always in the right,he is very controlling,every other word is the F word,lies,conning people,watches porn,probably goes with escorts,he doesnt deny it when asked,I would be very careful,and non christian would probably wont sex after at least a few dates,may be odd one who would respect your views but not many. I did know of someone married non christian she was christian,she did have drink problem though,now this guy she met he did believe in God,but he became a born agian christian while they courted,he really loved the Lord,but through her few slips with drink he left her after 15 months,and divorced her,which was a big shock to us all at church,he then married someone else 12 months later,so I wonder if in his heart he was as true as he appeared,so if this guy would perhaps become a christian it would be better,but it has got to be from his heart,we really should not date non christians,I have not done,just hoping christian guy contacts me,but please do not put this guy before your first love Jesus,I did and i regret it now,it caused me a lot of sorrow,and heartbreak,still is messing my life up.My dad did not believe to and my mum had a hard time with him,thankfully not long before he died at 81 he did accept Jesus into his heart.If you can be strong and date this guy and still hold on to the faith,you could try,see how he feels about God,but if he does not believe at all stay away,even if he does,do not marry him wait as long as you can,but it will be a big temptation for you if you fall in love with him,and after a few dates i would be surprised if he stay with you as most men especially if not christian will wont sex and that is out if you love the Lord. God bless and protect you my dear sister Chrissy will pray for you.  | |
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