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Posted: 5/5/2009 4:44:50 PM | An $80 - $100 Date should really be a special Occasion Date. I mean what really constitutes a 'Date'. If we just go toss a Frisbee at the Beach and share some Fried Chicken and a Beer - we would probably have a great Time, but would it qualify as a Date? After all we could probably do it for as little as $10 to $15?
I mean 'dating' is about having an enjoyable Time together and that doesn't need to cost a Bundle. All a Person needs to have are some Interests and a little Imagination. | |
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Posted: 5/5/2009 6:05:04 PM | I would assume I am paying for my own meal or coffee on the first date, unless he insisted. I am not a lady to argue or make a scene over petty things. yes it can get expensive but not all dates have to spend money. A walk in the park with a good cuddle as the sun goes down means more to me than dinner or things 'bought' ever would
JMO | |
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Posted: 5/5/2009 6:13:46 PM | | the_fire_behind_your_eyes : You are obviously a classy, fair minded and honest woman, unlike some of the NY women I've had the "pleasure" of dating. Does the saying "I'm entitled" mean anything? LOL Keep the first date or two simple guys (and gals) too. I like to think of dates as an old saying I heard many years ago, "come in as a stranger and leave as a friend". Put your best foot forward and see what happens. Remember too, there are POF in the SEA! | |
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Posted: 5/5/2009 10:48:17 PM | I've gone on dates where NO MONEY was spent on either party's side; dates where we've gone dutch; and dates where either he or I paid and the next time we switched....Makes no difference to a woman who isn't digging for gold...
Gonna need more than a fat wallet to keep me - I always say.  | |
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Posted: 5/6/2009 6:16:19 AM | trishinwi2009: Another great answer! With that attitude, I'm sure you have plenty of opportunities and the Lucky guy who finds you will have found GOLD!
(whether he was looking for it or not!)
Good Luck!
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Posted: 5/6/2009 7:23:25 AM | Unless you're one of those alpha males, dating is way too much of an uphill battle to make it worth it in my opinion. Even if theoretically you only spent $40 to get a chick into bed (yeah right), you still would've had to invest a whole lot of time and energy on her. How can you sit there and listen to some broad blabber on when you just want to get laid? What torture. Not to mention all the others you spent $40 on who never gave you anything more than a goodnight kiss.
I'll keep fucking two decent, mid-priced whores a week, thank you. | |
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Posted: 5/6/2009 7:37:03 AM | I'm glad I don't think like the last poster. I don't look at it as "trying to get the chicks panties off". Sorry...I never looked at it that way. If you are saying that I'm interested in intimacy, of course I am. However, I also need to be fiscally responsible and not be a fool like some men are with their hard earned money, and let the ladies get in "their "pants, specifically their wallets. Its a bad economy guys!
But I certainly and not necessarily do not go on the first date. I would hope that the lady I meet would also be interested in knowing me on an intimate level as well. If not, why bother going on dates? Just stay home and play with your BOBS!
"decent, mid-price whores" is a contraction in terms. Pay for sex when its supposed to be pleasureable for both is foolish. Also, its over before you know it and you are back to square ONE! No thanks! I'd rather meet a nice lady and hopefully have a glorious and wonderful life together. After getting through this "dating" stuff of course!
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Posted: 5/9/2009 4:53:06 PM | Why should a date have to cost much, if anything? The only money my sweetheart spent on our first meeting was for gas and a rose. We chatted online for a while and he decided he had to meet me before he went on a planned trip to TX to see his grandchildren. (He had made up his mind already that he liked me. *blush*) Unfortunately, due to my health circumstances I was unable to "go out" so he just came to my house and we spent the afternoon talking and getting to know each other better. Now we usually "go out" once a week or so and take turns paying. Most of our time together is spent just hanging around the house and just enjoying each others company. Priceless.
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Posted: 5/9/2009 6:37:43 PM | Props dude.
You know, this is an interesting subject, in my opinion. I love watching suckers go out and blow, 40. 50, 60 bucks on a date, and then never see the girl again until she is hungry the next time. Its going to happen to even the best looking of guys, so there is only one reasonable solution.
My wallet doesn't put out till they do.  | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 5:18:06 PM | DATE LESS or NOT at ALL!! I refuse to DATE unless I'm interested in a relationship!! I've NEVER been a big fan of "casual" dating! That's how u weed out those " casual WHINE n DINERS... by NOT doing it :)" Even though dates can be inexpensive in some cases, ur TIME is just as precious!!
I went on a few dates to where I wished I would have hit the town clubbing or going to a sporting event with some friends! I've learned my lesson NOW but some guys NEVER learn!
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Posted: 5/12/2009 5:36:47 PM | 2EachHisOwn: I enjoyed reading your response. Its good and its typical.
You mention: "Even though dates can be inexpensive in some cases, ur TIME is just as precious!! I went on a few dates to where I wished I would have hit the town clubbing or going to a sporting event with some friends! I've learned my lesson NOW but some guys NEVER learn!"
Oh, I've learned my lesson for sure!
I got really tired of some of the "indifference" some of my dates had towards me. Like I should be honored just to be in there presence and the feeling of entitlement some of them displayed. Before I even meet my dates, I like to talk on the phone, or through emails to try to get to know them a little bit. Try to find out a little bit about them and prepare myself a little for the date. I would dress up nice only to be met with someone who acted as if I was someone she just bumped into on the street. I learned long before meeting someone to talk to them first, get some things out in the open, one of them being where the date would take place. If she wanted to go some place expensive, (as more than a few of them suggested) I would chip in "so who's gonna pay for this?". (I always got the same answer "YOU, you're the guy". When I offered a coffee shop for coffee and a light snack and was told the old, "oh...I'm worth more than that", I knew right away to move on to the next one.
Remember guys, if you are doing the asking and the paying, then go where YOU want to take her. Otherwise, dating can and does get expensive regardless of your budget. Don't get used as a meal ticket on the first date!
As you say, after about 30 minutes or so of feeling like "why am I here?", like you I would say to myself I would have been better off staying home and/or talking to a woman who really wants to talk to me.
We Love You Ladies! Just please be fair and show some interest on a date. Also, out of politeness, perhaps if you really aren't interested in the guy, not attracted to the guy or just not "into" the guy, maybe its about time a woman offers to pay her half, or maybe even offer to pay the tip, especially with the economy being what it is today.
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Posted: 5/12/2009 6:01:12 PM | | bottle of cider in the park round our way mate, 3 quid a night!!! | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 7:04:41 PM | Don't put every women in to one bag. For starter coffee is not that expensive. Wait if there is second date if she is willing to pay for the coffee. If not ,find your self another women. To day there should be fifty fifty unless , is special occasion and you decide to pick up the tab. | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 7:11:50 PM | | You are right about that they should share the cost. But I think you don't have to be that cheep and you can take girl out for cup of coffee. | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 7:44:13 PM | | The last date cost me 0.00 and we had sex. | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 8:13:48 PM | Dating doesn't have to be expensive. I've had some really good dates that just involved:
-bike riding
-going for a walk along the lake and skimming rocks off the water
-going for ice cream
-going for coffee
-going to an art gallery | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 9:17:19 PM | | Sounds like you're advertising for gold-diggers to me. All women want to feel appreciated just like guys do. The convention is that the man pays. If you are dating that much without a picture, sounds like you are simply buying dates since they sure aren't emailing you on your good looks. If you can't perform on the contract don't induce the other party. Try finding somebody who wants you for your charm. | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 9:40:51 PM | I can't imagine a guy spending $1200 a month and dating 3-4 times a week as the OP states. If he thinks it's too expensive then all he has to do is STOP!
And I do not consider the first meeting a date (unless you get along well enough to spend hours together) regardless of who pays (and in my experience the men always pay (their choice) and that is as it should be (my opinion) and I think Starbucks is so cliche that I'd rather go to 7/11 for a slurpee. BTW I am not a "gold digger"! I have my own resources, worked hard for them and don't expect high priced presents in exchange for my company, but I do very much appreciate a man who is willing and able to pay for the date. Dinner out is great, but I'd be just as happy doing less expensive or free activities. In the LONG RUN, if he's a keeper, it will be well worth the TIME and money spent as I tend to be very generous myself.
I used to believe in the 50/50 thing when I was younger, but according to my father and the men who are my friends, MEN PAY! And none of them ever complain about it either. Guess they are PROUD that they can AFFORD to PROVE that they can PROVIDE for a woman. Maybe their just "old school" and manly! Course they can spot a gold digger a mile away and those wenches don't get 2nd dates. My dad drives his jeep on first dates to see how women react. If they put their nose up then he knows they're judging him by his ride. They never set foot inside the Lincoln. | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 9:52:16 PM | ^^^Buckmaker^^^
Well said! Course you're in Texas! I think I should vacation in TX and see if I can round up a cowboy with old school manners and southern(?) charm! God, Country and American culture at it's best. hmmm, there's something to think about! And if they secede from the "union" at least I'd be in the "right" state!
best! | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 9:55:25 PM | | Never mind Texas...come to NYC! | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 10:06:56 PM |
Never mind Texas...come to NYC
But I am a country girl...I wouldn't mind a helocopter ride over the city to get a great view of the architecture and then some window shopping, maybe even a little shoe shopping, and then pizza and maybe a good Italian eatery! I'll consider it. Somebody is going to treat herself to a very nice American vacation this year!
CYA! | |
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Posted: 5/12/2009 11:49:47 PM | if a girl doesn't go dutch, or at least offer to.... send her on her way.
Personally, I think going dutch is tacky. It's better to just be mercenary about weeding out flakes very quickly so that you never meet them.
I got really tired of some of the "indifference" some of my dates had towards me.
I've had that happen once, but instead of letting happen again, I try to pick up on that sort of attitude and tell them I'm not interested before ever taking them out - no matter how much I think I'd like to date someone. Since this is internet dating I assume it requires a different approach than regular dating and the best thing is to just say no to anyone who makes it the least bit inconvenient to meet or who exhibits any behaviour you find a little weird. Without fail, every date I've gone on in which I was skeptical but gave someone the benefit of the doubt, proved to be a mistake.
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Posted: 5/13/2009 12:05:17 AM | ideas for dates that are inexpensive but not 'cheap:
don't do dinner, unless it's a simple one.
*invite her to a park for an after-the - dinner- hour/afternoon wine and cheese picnic-
ADVANTAGES: if she's not into you, you can either down the bottle, or slap the
cork back on and pack up
*go shoot hoops at a neighborhood park (assuming she likes this)
* go for a walk and t-a-l-k
*go to a matinee movie ( a lot of major cities have highly reduced rates, aka $1 movies)
*go for a bike ride ( at a park, etc.)
*fly kites at a park - re*live the child in you
*get the idea? save your money for a dinner on the second or third date.
you can date less or date 'smart'- it shouldn't matter whaat you do, within reason--
it should matter who you are with | |
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Posted: 5/13/2009 3:48:39 AM |
The last date cost me 0.00 and we had sex.
LOL - did your "date" come with an air pump and a patch kit? | |
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Posted: 5/13/2009 4:32:45 AM | jerseygirl2008 writes: He wrote: The last date cost me 0.00 and we had sex.
You wrote: LOL - did your "date" come with an air pump and a patch kit?
I totally agree with you! I wanted to say "And the point is?"
Mxchic: Keep us in mind! There is plenty to do here in the Big Apple!
abelian writes: "I try to pick up on that sort of attitude and tell them I'm not interested before ever taking them out ". You are making my point. As women like to accuse men of having an "agenda" or "alterior motives", there are some women who do similar things, like show a lot of interest in you on the phone, but when you meet them in person, they take on a totally different persona. Its as if they either had something else in mind, or don't like your looks or worse, simply using the guy for a meal ticket. This is why I STRONGLY suggest to all guys, take them out for coffee. maybe an ice cream, keep your minimum investment low on the first date. Ladies, if you really don't find the guy to you liking, why make him pay the whole frieght, offer to pay your half or maybe pay the tip. It won't kill you to show a little heart. If the date goes well, then maybe next time you splurge a little. Hopefully if there is a third date, you both WANT to be there and the "cost" of the date shouldn't matter so much.
artist_48: Very good ideas! You seem like a great lady and the kind I'd like to meet. Guys, pay attention to this woman...she sounds like a keeper! | |
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