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| | My New Girlfriends Nuts!Page 5 of 9 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9) | | I don't think she's a nut girl,I think "YOUR" hiding an eskeleton in your closet that why you don't want to tell you password. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/16/2007 10:01:58 PM | This girl has serious trust and control issues. I'm sorry but if some guy acted like that with me, I don't care how good looking or how great in the sack he is, he couldn't be out the door fast enough.
Everyone has rights to their privacy and friends no matter what the gender. If a friendship on MSN can cause conflict, how is she going to react if you give a good tip to a hard working waitress in a restraunt? How about if you even glance at the waitress' nametag? Is she going to pick a fight with some woman that just glances at you on the street?
The only way I could possibly see a relationship with someone who acts like you explained working out would be if the two of you lived in the middle of nowhere, worked at home, got rid of the tv, hunted for your own food, and God forbid you ever get a female dog for she may just get jealous of that as well.
In all honesty there may be a reason that she's the way she is but she really needs to learn to put that behind her. As for you in the meantime think about this long and hard. Do you really want to spend every minute that you two are not joined at the hip having to answer questions on why you were late, where you were, who you were with, what did you do every second you were gone, and why didn't you answer your cell phone on the first ring? | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/16/2007 10:07:27 PM | Wow - I never thought this posting would have gathered so much interest - Wow again :) I'd like to answer each and every one of you - but - ya know - work and stuff lol. But - I would like to say "Thanks" ;) To Everyone - With Positive and Negative stuff to say :)
The Debates and the Advice from you all - Is Amazing!
Share your stories here - I'd love to hear other examples ;) Take Care People ;)
Cya in the Forum ;)  | |
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Vancer
| | Joined: 10/29/2006
Msg: 104 | |
| My New Girlfriend's Nuts!
Posted: 5/16/2007 11:22:21 PM | Well at least Schaeen put the apostrophe in the right place as I mentioned.
Now let's see how long the NEW subject line lasts.
Mwa ha haaa 
BTW, I'm a goof too. Blame my parents on that one. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 12:00:13 AM | mmuuuuwwwahhhaaaaaaaaaaa
Girlfriend's....not as in she "is" but in she "has" . Punctuation rocks!
Sorry OPie, had to do it.
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Rhett1
| | Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 106 | |
| My New Girlfriend's Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 12:00:53 AM | OP: I don't know...you are right that she's being a wacko...she has no right to your passwords. BUT...I can't help but think there might possibly be some reason for her behaviour.
By this, I mean the fact that you seem to be keeping your options open online. I'd be going a little flaky too if I had a boyfriend that was doing this (oh wait, I did). I speak from experience. This can go either way. We have to take your word for it, which is only one side of the story.
If what you have shared with us is the God's-honest truth...you're better off without her. If you are actually goading her with online friendships with other women, memberships on other sites (and this one), then she has the right to wonder. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 12:31:34 AM |
Posted By: tdh46 on 5/16/2007 5  52 AM Subject: My New Girlfriends Nuts! Message: Op i honestly can't keep up with your contradictions.
TDH46, is always inspiring, he doesn't take any prisoners, and he cracks the whip through bulls~t like a matador!
Lets face it internet dating is one hell of a new thing, it is lonely-heart columns gone cyber, and you can 'cheat online' even in IM's chats, it is quite simply possible from the security of your own bedroom, or dining room, to open as many chat windows as your pc's capability will allow and flirt, innocently or not so... whilst your supposed 'lover' or special potential new partner is online with you.
You can fall in love at any time during a relationship and whilst healthy boundaries should be there, people are humans and their imagination can run riot in such a complex environment. I know for a fact that the tantalising lure of being baited on here by another babe, is what often keeps men (more than women) staying on here long after they are supposed to be 'dating'.
I wouldn't hesitate to hand over my password once I was sure about a person, but then I had shared bank accounts with my ex-hubby, and open agendas.
If in the real world, millions of people are discovering that they are being cheated on, or that their partner has a dark secret habit of trying to seduce the neighbour's wife,  cyberspace offers absolutely NO comfort or real security of loyaltyand devotion. You have to accept on 'face value' if you actually have a face, and even then you really never know.
The written word is unquestionably the most amazing medium and it can lock you into the most incredible bondings...
A month is early on in the relationship, and to be honest it seems perfectly reasonable to (not offer up passwords, cos relationships can fold at any time and even after many years - HONEST...  ) sit down with a potential partner and discover whether you are on the same page, however, the truth is that relationships never run smoothly, and whether it is history, or past patterns or trust issues, if you are really interested in building security in a relationship then you work respectfully through it and do what you can to be unambigious, and straightforward and open.
Not to say that some people whether they are attractive or not which was the most ludicrous part of the OP's initial posting, suggesting that security should be normal in a 'hot person', should be allowed to hammer accusations of unfaithfullness' all over you, but you have to be conscientiously mature in cyberspace and respect that people DO cheat, and that they are insincere and egoes are easily flattered here and heads can be swayed (even momentarily - but long enough to destroy trust)... by a soft word, pretty face, or other fatalistic lure. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 1:17:08 AM | | she doesnt trust you - Cant have a relationship without trust - get rid. | |
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g54cs
| | Joined: 4/12/2007
Msg: 110 | |
| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 4:26:44 AM | wow, that's a lot of control for one person to have over you unless
you allow it, your choice; not in my books tho. There's control and
there's communication, sounds like you need to have this chat with
her if you really do care for her. Otherwise .. well, you know the rest | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 5:45:59 AM | Just to let the OP know ,,,I have now had 40 messages to my inbox in regards to this forum,,,they like to read but will not post their opinions on here,,,most of them agreeing with TDH...not all but most...oh and by the way OP I usually don't try to belittle people thats not me,,,But I really don't need any help in attracting the ladies by posting on here...you seem to throw that at most of the gentlemen that disagree with you ...
We were going to delete this post because of the business issue I said let it go,,You sound like you wanted to make light of the situation,,but should have stated that right from the start....Have fun on here,, thats what its all about,,,good luck with your business and happy fishing,,you seem like a nice guy...
Back on topic,,I would have no problems in giving my password out to a girlfriend,I have nothing to hide,I would wonder why she asked... | |
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shoree
| | Joined: 4/29/2007
Msg: 112 | |
| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 5:58:30 AM | That's way too controlling!
I'm sorry, but for me that just shows a lack of boundaries, a lack of respect and trust for YOU and just overall immaturity.
I wouldn't want a relationship like this | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 6:43:56 AM | | Dr Phil would say "I quote" "If you have nothing to hide, hide nothing" ya I know not everyone agrees with the Doctor... In another forum everyone was in agreement that their life would be an open book. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 6:51:52 AM | | Immature people find immature people, crazy people find crazy people... and they keep them as a mate...............enuff said ! | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 7:00:06 AM | ^^^^^Lmoa,,I have never looked at it like that before,,although there has been a gazillion references to that frame of mind,,,Not suggesting anyone on here could be crazy... People do like these types of forums though,,
Just killing my morning off to work soon,,lol.. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 7:02:14 AM | | I will tell you what I tell my sons - sometimes we care about people who are not good for us - what she is doing is extreme - If you two are sleeping together, then you don't need to be looking for others, but to ask for your password??? Sounds like she is not confident in herself and seeks to control - she may not mean to be this way but it will get worse. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 7:24:33 AM | ...But, in some cases, my name still remains in certain places due to the uncertainty of our future...
This is problem where her problems (well some of them) are steming from. You say that your loyal to her 100%, yet you said the above "due to the uncertainity of our future my name still remains in certain places".., well HELLO. I agree she is getting a bit crazy, but obviously she feels like your not giving her your 100% because YOUR NOT. ., why is it that people seem to 'hold on' to someone until someone 'better' comes along?? That's what your doing., your not sure if it's going to 'work out' or not, so your still looking.,
uh!!!!
She does need to get in control of herself, but DAMN, take yourself off the market already! | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 7:25:13 AM | | When im with someone, I will show some emails or jokes, or retell what some of m y penpals say about a subject, but Ive never given out my passwords,, Never, cos you can be w someone for a long time and when it doesnt work out, they can go to your accounts and cause mayhem. If she is suspicious, then she doesnt trust you and w/out trust Where can this relationship lead? heartbreak? Looks like shes already in Pain. Try talking about it, and she gives you the LOok for looking at pretty women on tv??? duh,,, I look at tv mostly to get a look, lol everybody likes eye candy! lol hey its on TV,, So far I havent met any of my hunks of burnin love on tv,, and dont have any illusions about that, so its kind of ridiculous,,,,, Unless you plan on moving to Hoollywood,,, har! best of luck! | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 4:02:46 PM | | I have NEVER in all of my years of dating had a woman ask for my password for anything, want to read my mail, etc. There is absolutely no reason for it. I would never ask for my partner's private correspondence. It is none of my business and I have never, ever questioned a partner's email, mail or calls with anyone. This, "what do you have to hide" B.S. is just that...B.S. It is an argument designed to create doubt and distrust for something that is completely unnecessary. I would love to see Dr. Phil directly say it is normal for a partner to ask for your private mail and email access. Let's not twist and interpret something else he said to "imply" that. Does this mean I should be completely willing to give my significant other I have been dating a month my IRS/Tax information, Social Security Number, Bank records, just to prove I trust her and have nothing to hide. Let's be real. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 4:19:02 PM | | I would say thats definally going to far if she's wanting your password and checkingup on you like that. Especially if youre in a new relationship. Its too soon for that. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 5:32:12 PM | "In another forum everyone was in agreement that their life would be an open book." 000firefighter There are two camps on this. It's really an issue of personal privacy and how that factors into a relationship, IMO.
I certainly value my privacy, when I've just met someone or are just casually dating. None of his business what I'm doing, where I'm going if we're not involved. And I do only date one person at a time, a first meet. Well there have been times where there's been more than one shared coffee/drink in a week. Hardly qualifies for a serial dater.
Once you make the step to being committed, whole different ball of wax. I always say people should do what they feel is right, so to the people in the other camp, not judging you or saying you're wrong.
I have no privacy issues because I am and have been involved for awhile. The whole privacy thing for us is a non issue. He has access to everything I do online, and me likewise. Our friends know and understand that, if they want to have a private convo, then no problem. It's always been girl talk anyway, never had a private convo I kept from my SO with one of my male friends. Then again, my male friends never asked.
I've asked him to look for something in my purse while I was getting dressed/in the shower. Nothing for him to find, that I wouldn't be horrified for him to see. He knows what feminine products are, so that would hardly be a shock.
No offense to the people whose lives are so private, they wouldn't share anything and everything with an SO.
That's what right for us and it just works. 
For those who're saying it's a control/trust issue...I can only wonder what type of relationships are you involved in? If you're worried about them ripping you off, hardly a control issue is it. Maybe just that you don't trust yourself and keep making bad choices. Or you don't have a relationship that you do share your whole lives. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 5:37:23 PM | | She`ll drive you crazy sooner or later.I never understood the password sharing. | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 5:48:19 PM | [/ I don't think she's a nut girl,I think "YOUR" hiding an eskeleton in your closet that why you don't want to tell you password. ]
Huh????? Are you sure this isn't your girlfriend???
Talk about insecure.... run like the wind baby  | |
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| My New Girlfriends Nuts!
Posted: 5/17/2007 6:00:23 PM | | bucsgirl, my partners have let me go through their purse, no big deal. I have never had a desire to need to delve into their email, mail and other personal things. If they care to share it with me fine. If I care to share private things with them, fine. If both parties truly trust each other it can be said they don't need to have to worry about sharing every little thing with their partner. They either naturally share things or they naturally don't care about what you are emailing someone else because they trust you. We are talking about 1 month here. Not quite the amount of time that I think one should be requesting the type of things we are talking about here. It does make a difference when two people hardly know each other yet and request such a thing. | |
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