| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/18/2007 11:03:57 AM | | Many of you who suffer from depression will notice that it is worse in Winter. This is caused by a lack of sunlight and lack of exercise. If you get badly depressed the "natural" way of dealing with it is to lock yourself inside your dark bedroom and hope and pray that the horrible world outside your door will disappear. This is the worst thing to do as it will make the depression much worst. Make yourself get outside into the sunshine and get some exercise. Also, make sure that you are eating a good meal at least once a day.....no engine can run without fuel! Hospitals and nursing homes are all run on a tight timetable which is basically: breakfast, morning tea and biscuit, lunch, afternoon tea and snack, dinner, supper, then bedtime about 10pm. This makes sure that the body's sugar/energy levels are kept up to a normal level. Are you caring for your body as you should be? Go for a walk, take up gardening, go for a bike ride, go to a gym, go for a swim, take up a sport or coach someone else. Then get involved in doing some kind of voluntry work for people who you feel really need your help and stick with it even if it upsets you sometimes.......that is good, it shows that you have a heart and are a caring person. Don't be ashamed to have a cry about something that is upsetting you. Then put it behind you, it is probably about something in the past or if current, is something that you can't change anyway (ie someone else's actions) SO ask God to take care of it, put on some happy music or watch a comedy movie. Oh, and remember your friends and give them a call, they need you. Drop in and help them.......How?.........listen to them, don't talk about your problems, offer some practical help, it is much more fun and satisfying to do some gardening etc with someone else. You can talk while you work, two can lift things that one can't, the time flies by, and when you finish there is someone else to admire the finished job and have a cuppa (cup of tea or coffee) with. Smile at strangers, do good deeds without expecting anything in return, you will receive it back when you least expect it but need a helping hand the most. Be polite and have a caring attitude to all those that you contact on this site, they all have feelings too. God bless you all (hey, that means the whole world!). | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/18/2007 5:03:15 PM | I just have to shake my head and roll my eyes at some of the helpful comments here. Bad Depression is like sitting in a dark room...chained to a chair. It's almost like throwing oneself into an abyss when it gets bad. In it's worse times the harshness is relished and as big as the center of the earth.
Fortunately I'm better and certainly understand all the intrusive thoughts. When you are feeling worthless and you truly don't care what happens next...you must pick up the phone. You must make a pact with one or two people that won't freak out and can just talk to you without BS. That's what helps me...I take a medicine too but hope next year to get off of it. It's nice to have that crutch but I'd rather not take meds. Tuka
PS, Don'tcha love all the peeps that think taking an antidepressant is sooo bad. I figure they must be slightly over narcisistic!! | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/18/2007 7:58:11 PM | it would be great to think that you could get rid of ur depression so easily... ive read ever post in this thread and some ive though wow i get like that, wow ive tried that..i cant honestly say what the best way is because every body is different and everybody suffers differently.
ive suffered depression on and off for years now. yes medication works but i hate feeling like i have to take a tablet to control my life haha
When all is going well i make the mistake of going off it in the hope of me being able to deal with my daily life without chemical help. But sometimes those chemicals are whats needed to balance things out.
I have come to realise that me and only me can make me feel better. I have to choose to take my tablets, i have to choose to love myself when no one else does.
As I was reading these posts I was crying , as im having a down moment but it helps to put things down in writting and knowing that you are not alone.
I now think of my family and friends if i get in a really dark spot. My aunty and uncle both commited suicide through depression and I saw how that affected all the family.
I now suffering depression refuse to be the cause of that pain to people that I love.
So no matter how hard its gets there is always someine worse off then you.
People might disagree or agree , to be honest I dont care because in writting this I have now stopped crying and am about to take my dog for a walk in the sunshine .
Life is way to short as it is to let lifes crap keep you down,
I nearly lost my life to a car accident and lost a baby so i have had a small share of suffering,
I know I will always suffer depression but it is my choice to wether im going to let it get me down or im going to take it by the horns and say no not today
Today im going to smile again walk and enjoy the day
hugs to all and smile for a hug and a smile will always make someone feel better. | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/18/2007 10:20:21 PM | post 54, yep the time of year does indeed have a lot to do wit the level of the depression. Be it seasonal, or a time of a particular event in the past.
However, with the many causes of depression, it is not always such a simple thing as going out for a walk.
In my case, one of the factors that adds to my depression is never having any kids, another is getting older and being alone.
Ohhh that’s not so bad some will say, maybe they don’t value a family environment, or the company of a special lady. | |
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AB2
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Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 55 | |
| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/20/2007 2:07:36 PM | Ole I can definitely say for a lot of people that is normal to get depressed when you don't have that family environment, like having that special lady in your life to share with and kids that you helped create.
Somtimes I feel depressed towards those same things too and i'm only 25.Even though people say your young you have a lot of time.But if you know what you want why wait?
Thats just more time you could be doing what you knew you wanted to do.
For some people they have no problem being alone,and some alone time is good and healthy.But not when it adds up to weeks,months and years.
The rest of us hate being alone and want people in our life to share things with.
Now taking a pill will not give you those things but rather "help"deal with the fact that you don't have them.I rather have those things and be happy than to take a pill and deal with why i don't have them.
Keep your head up,you will eventually find someone soon to begin a life with.Just think positive.
Have you thought about adopting until you had your won kids?
If i don't have my own kids by a certain age i think i will most certainly adopt. | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/20/2007 2:18:43 PM | | Sucide is not an option. Just try to hold it together. We all go through low points in our life. It just makes us stronger. | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/20/2007 4:09:56 PM | Unfortunately - for some of us - medication is a necessity not an option !!!
I wish, I really do wish, I didn't have to rely on my tablets to keep me normal and I've tried doing without - but my body won't let me cope and the thought of descending further into that black hole scares me witless !!!
So - I'm afraid I'll just keep taking my tablets and "feeling more normal" than I have for years - it helps me deal with what life throws at me.
And yes being on my own makes me feel sad and down - and I wonder if I'll meet someone special - but the medication stops the ever downward spiral and I don't get the urge to end it - well not quite as often as I used to !!
Try and get some help
Try and keep your chin up 
Fran xx | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 1:31:29 AM | How true so many of these posts are.
I guess in some ways I have blown any chance of meeting a lady on here with being so open, but then it also saves having to open up face to face with someone, and then having them do a runner once they do know.
It seems like some people treat those who have depression with contempt, like the bubonic plague or something. | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 1:53:15 AM |
Just how many here have become depressed over loneliness, and how many have actually thought of suicide?
~OP~ I wouldn't worry about what type of ladies will judge you based upon this post. It's a good topic and there have been some great posts.
I am not prone to depression or loneliness. However, I've had raging panic disorder since my late teens that went undiagnosed (or even discussed by me) until I was 29. By age 30, I was completely housebound and had I had one once of self-esteem left, I think I might have ended things that day. I was so riddled with panic and self-doubt, I was afraid to attempt suicide because I would probably botch the job and end up a head of cauliflower. It was then that I realized it was either get busy living or get busy dying. Since dying wasn't an option ~ I had to pull it together.
Several years ago, I was in an amazing relationship (which fate took away from me, sadly.) During that time, I hoped for death. But, when I thought of suicide, the only real thought that I had was my son. He knew I was physically ill (extremely), heartbroken, and that I lived 1750 miles away. For me, I didn't want to die before seeing him, which meant I had to live long enough to make the trip out here. Obviously, that was my excuse for living. Thankfully.
Maybe others don't understand that there is truly a fine line between those of us who think or have thought about this and those who actually atttempt it or those who succeed. In all reality ~ I don't find it disturbing that someone has/had these thoughts, I find it disturbing that so many judge when one is honest about it.
I can only sympathize for those who have depression. But I can empathize with those who have had thoughts of not wanting to live anymore. For me, once I stopped fearing death and started actually living ~ those thoughts have never once entered my mind. I hope you find peace for yourself and that it sticks around! JMO  | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 2:52:46 AM | Very Interesting posts on this topic..I to have started a topic on depression....in the Newfoundland Forum...If any of you are interested in reading.....for I to...suffer from depression! I will say in here....to ANYONE who suffers from this Illness....Is depressed because of getting older....being alone...not having children...what ever it may be....seek help NOW! Life is like a book....each day a different page....each month a chapter....but it is up to us how that book is written! Believe it or not...it can get better! Trust me, "I HAVE BEEN THERE....AND BACK"...... Good luck to all....
Cindy68 | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 3:04:41 AM | | my 8 yr old daughter father committed suicide by hanging himself she was 5 at the time. It did it at the worse possible time which was a day after fathers day. So know every time fathers day comes along all i can think about is him doing it. i went to the house that he did it and found the bent hook that he used. The house was very very spooky. I have his tv cabinet and every birthday of his comes along and it creeks and it does this on the annaversary of his death. On his first birthday after his death i had to put on a birthday party for him because she wanted to. Evrer had a party for a dead person before??????????????? Very very very very very strange. The saddest moment after his death was after we left the house that he died in my daughter told me she wanted to die to be with her dad. And this is coming from a child was was robbed of ever having a relationship with him because of his cow of a wife that he so stupidly married. | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 4:41:13 AM | cindy68,
i dont mind if you put a link here from your thread | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 9:31:53 AM | Anyone with an ounce of decency and understanding won't be put off by your depression !!
And yes, people regard depression as the new bubonic plague - or even worse that "you can pull yourself together" !!!
TAke care
Try and keep your chin up
Fran xx | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 2:12:42 PM | Depression can stike anyone... Well, for my story.....I have been depressed since my teens, I am now 41.
I didn't realize it but it got to the point of extremes...it debilitated me. I went down to under 100 lbs...no antidepressants at that time - it was self medication. What an awful period in my life. Yes, suicide was an option, but not.....my family left behind, my faith...(for believer's where will you go - peragatory, hell??? very scarey) The blackness never left me for years or it would rear up its head during stressful times and I couldn't get out of bed for days.
I got the help I needed and today leading a productive life, 2 children.....yes I still get depessed at times but as the saying goes "this too shall pass"......and it does.
Just hang on to a rope, when you come to the end, tie a knot and reach out to someone....there are really people who care.....God bless | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 6:36:14 PM | I think suicide has crossed everyone's mind. I don't take my thoughts of suicide seriously. I know I don't have it within me to kill myself, even at my most bitter moments.
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 9:31:07 PM | | i came close in june of 06... but my ex at the time saved me... shame, i still love her and its been 6 months since we broke up... it is hard for us all to pick up our heart and move on... | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 10:07:42 PM | | I was depressed and suicidal in the late 80’s. When I finally bottomed out and was ready to end it all, I realized that once you have nothing left to lose, you gain the power to do anything. I think all of us have been sold a bill of goods over the years. We’re told that we should be happy and we shouldn’t be lonely. Too much of anything is not good, even happiness. We need the sad time to make the happy ones sweeter. Placing the onus of sadness at our own feet just make it look like it’s our fault that we are to blame. Saying we should not be lonely, is like telling a person that you should never allow yourself to be hungry. Eat all the time, and you get obese. We need loneliness to focus on ourselves, to grow; just like we need to sleep. When you learn to embrace loneliness for what it truly is; time to work on yourself; at that point you become unbound and truly free. | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 10:11:27 PM |
suicide is for cowards!!!! So NOT true. Spoken by someone not at all empathetic to depression.
Just hang on to a rope, when you come to the end, tie a knot and reach out to someone....there are really people who care.....God bless
I took antidepressant meds when I felt that i was barely hanging on by fingertips to the very end of a badly frayed rope and was scared of the black abyss below and at the same time, wishing the drop had already happened. The meds didn't change my life but made me feel like a great big knot had been tied at the end and that I had a secure grip on the rope. It took a long time to slip down that far - the slide was subtle, insidious. The climb back to 'normalcy' what ever that is, has taken a long time too but so worth it. Once I had a foot hold on that rope, as well as a good two handed grip, my perspective changed and a smidge of self confidence grew. I've made some changes. Now, I laugh. I smile.
Best wishes all  | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 10:49:32 PM |
suicide is for cowards!!!! I agree with fishGoFish. This is not true. Only a moron and idiot views it this way. To get to the point of actually ending all you have to loose all sense of reality and selfworth. I suffer from depression and have done for some years. I was coping fine and starting to come off my meds. At that time the woman who appearently was inlove with me dumped me. In a matter of hours I went from happy and looking forward to a decent future with some who loved me to wanting to end it all. Several times I got to the point of sitting on the bathroom floor with blade in hand in tears. This was how most of my nights went from Dec 30 '05 to mid March 06. Each time I remembered who I would leave behind and how it would hurt them. Why did I realise this? I was still a sane rational thinking person! I still have thoughts of suicide on a weekly basis but have pulled through with the help of my Dr, Psychologist and meds. I go from happy periods to periods where I don't even care to leave the house or wish I would die in my sleep. Alot of times I wish I had ended it one of the last two nights in 05. Give the details above, I realise I shouldn't be looking for someone at present and have already deleted my profile off 1 dating site and will do so here in the very near future. Chris  | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 11:05:24 PM | I had a very hard childhood with an alcoholic father and a very passive (scared of my father ) mother. He threatened to kill me many times in my teen age years and I was almost ready for it many times cause the life there was unbearable....he held a gun to my head on three different occasions...and yes he was my real father...but backed down every time..Im not sure why..but after that I started to mutilate myself with cutting cause my bf at that time was just as mean as my father....finally I got away and now my father is dead and Im happy....thats all I have to say...no Im not married...I was once but didnt work out....I guess Im destined to be alone | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/21/2007 11:41:00 PM | Depressed over loneliness?
All the time, however this niggling "self preservation" instinct keeps me from performing the ultimate act.
As to dealing with the loneliness, it may not be a perfect solution, but thank god for MMORPG's. ( Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games... World of Warcraft to you non gamers )  | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/22/2007 3:16:35 AM | | suicide is not a cowards way out. My daughters father committed suicide and suffered from bipola. He is so much happier know im sure much happier than when he was alive | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/22/2007 9:05:01 AM | Suicde is for cowards !!! Please !!!!!!!! Get a life and some understanding !!!
Suicide is for some the final and only solution to their problems - it takes a lot to drive someone to that point and even more to go through with the act !!!
Perhaps if you'd been in that position , feeling so depserate that you would do anything to get rid of the total blackness that doesn't just surround you - it encompasses you and everything in your life - you'd be more aware and perhaps even a nicer person !!
That's it - rant over !!
Try and keep your chin up
Fran xx | |
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| Depression and suicide
Posted: 5/22/2007 9:51:49 AM | Nothing is ever thast bad, and if it is, it will get better sooner rather than later.
Think of all the people in the world that are WAY worse off than you; do you have running water? an indoor toilet? a bed to sleep in and food to eat? Well, you are better off than a percent of the world's population (not quoting numbers here, cause I know if I do, someone will call me on it for being wrong)
This is a very personal thing for me. I just lost another friend yesterday to suicide, and it sucks, cause that's the ONE THING you can't take back; words, actions all that can be fixed, but that can't.
Man, Tim, I miss you already.
Fry | |
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