| | Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?Page 3 of 12 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12) | | i reckon this will cause a massive stir! i think it is not cheating at all as long as it is only a dance and no extras are going on on the side! i have been to strip clubs before and had a lap dance although i am not a huge fan of the places ( i tend to get embarrassed!) and have had no problem letting the other half know! | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 7:34:07 AM | | Not at all, would prefer her to be with me when she receives it, i would pay for it too, as long she paid when it was my turn. Maybe it would enhance my chances of getting a three-some on, at some stage of our relationship lol. | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 9:34:12 AM | Communication.
Find your boundries as to what is acceptable and what is not in your relationship and agree upon them.
Cheating:
1 : to deprive,to practice , or to influence... . something/someone valuable by the use or lead...of deceit, fraud,trick, or artifice...to violate rules dishonestly.
2 : to be sexually unfaithful.
What is deemed cheating to some couples is not to others. As long as you communicate and are honest...respecting boundries and rules that you both have set...I don't for see a problem. | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 10:09:33 AM | | I agree with post 38 and nick euroathenian.....this is the type of activity that occurred in my last relationship (by him) and is the reason why we remained engaged rather than actually tying the knot athough he kept pushing to set the wedding date (which after 4 years of being engaged we finally did set the date).....It was difficult to learn to forgive and forget the lies that went along with the behavior, the devastation it created on my end as to my self esteem....not to mention the break in trust. Although I tried very hard I never did completely trust him again as there was always that nagging feeling that something was amiss...and it was..he was cheating on me...in retrospect....the relationship ending was the best thing that happened to me...his frequenting the strip clubs, etc....was basically cheating not only on me, but also cheating our relationship from becoming a better one. | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 10:19:13 AM | No offense Blondeandhappy, but most forms of pornography are an entirely different subject. I can definitely see how someone's attraction to porn can be troubling to the other partner, at which time the two people hopefully can discuss the issue and come to a mutually agreeable conclusion or compromise.
In the same manner, if a person wants to accept their partner's propensity to receive lap dances as acceptable, fine and dandy, but I'd assume otherwise; if I were in committed monogamous relationship, I'd find it unacceptable for another man's genital organs to be in such close titillating proximity to my lady's body. If she thought it were acceptable and told me so, I'd probably end the relationship. Not discussing it beforehand is cheating.
I find porn much less troubling, but if I believed my partner was spending inordinate amounts of time being entertained by pornography, I'd find that troubling as well. | |
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tdh46
| | Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 56 | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 4:05:08 PM | | Yeah it is cheating. If my man wants an a s s in his face it will be mine. The first time he has someone else's a s s in his face it would be the last time he ever saw mine. I think it is totally disrespectful. If you are happy at home then way should you be out looking for it somewhere else??? | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 5:29:17 PM | Yes. I have no problem with him looking or even going to the strip clubs but once touching begins it does not matter if it is a stripper or a girl from his office, it is wrong.
A male friend of mine bartended at a gentlemans club and he said the #1 complaint of the girls was that 50% of the men they gave lap dances to were VERY satisfied resulting in a lots of costume changes. So if that isn't cheating I don't know what is! | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 5:37:16 PM | ~OP~ If the man in my life feels the need to have that type of attention, so be it. It would be a sign to me that we have much deeper issues than his need for outside female attention. I have found that if someone is truly happy at home ~ they have no interest in having a stranger wiggle around on them knowing full well, it's not going to amount to anything but a decrease in their wallet. JMO  | |
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tdh46
| | Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 61 | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 6:14:22 PM | | ^^^^^^Of course. I have the definite view that if he's happy at home, he's happy at home. Sexual agreement or compatibility is vital. And, it does take two to keep things alive, exciting, fulfilling, etc. So, I'm a willing particpant. | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 7:20:46 PM | I myself would never go to strip clubs if I was dating someone or married.
Personal preferences. Though I'd love to find a wife that can do a lap dance. Would increase the pleasure, unfortunately I can't do lap dances though so that would be a tad unfair to her. Though I got other talents that she might lack which would level out the field.
Never know. But I don't feel it is right for men to go to Strip Clubs. Unless their woman desires to go with them. I have watched men and women both in a strip club watching their partner get lap dances.
One night I watched a woman with her husband and learned that she was taking lessons from the dances. Later she did a dance for her husband. Fully clothed which I admired of her. I figure her husband got a full treat later that night.
That is just my opinion. I am sure it isn't shared by many.
As for cheating? I know some women would be offended, thus in their case I'd say yes it is cheating. This could end up in divorce concerning some women and I bet the courts would call it cheating due to the man getting attention from another and ignoring his wife. That again would depend on a Judges ruling.
On other hand if the wife agrees to it, no, I don't feel it is cheating.
And the relationship is a good one with proper communication. The man would not do such a thing without his loved ones permission or approval. | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 7:30:02 PM | In my eyes, doing anything in secret that you know violates your partner's trust is cheating. If you're a guy and feel the need to go to strip clubs, be with a woman who will go with you. Hell, buy HER a lap dance. I bet you'll get more out of it from watching her getting the dance than YOU getting the dance. And the dancer will enjoy it more, in most cases.
And you might even learn something in the process.
Not that I've ever been to a strip club or nuthin'...  | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 7:39:06 PM | Anything you do that's secret and violates trust? I don't know. I don't think that it's cheating if I break some china and glue it back together so she doesn't find out about it.
Dishonest, yes. Stupid, yes. Entirely too "Full House?"Yes. Cheating? No.
I've never done this, mind you. It's a good example though. | |
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tdh46
| | Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 71 | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 7:46:58 PM | trust
–noun
1. reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.
2. confident expectation of something; hope.
3. confidence in the certainty of future payment for property or goods received; credit: to sell merchandise on trust.
4. a person on whom or thing on which one relies: God is my trust.
5. the condition of one to whom something has been entrusted.
6. the obligation or responsibility imposed on a person in whom confidence or authority is placed: a position of trust.
7. charge, custody, or care: to leave valuables in someone's trust.
8. something committed or entrusted to one's care for use or safekeeping, as an office, duty, or the like; responsibility; charge.
cheat
v. tr.
To deceive by trickery; swindle: cheated customers by overcharging them for purchases.
To deprive by trickery; defraud: cheated them of their land.
To mislead; fool: illusions that cheat the eye.
To elude; escape: cheat death.
v. intr.
To act dishonestly; practice fraud.
To violate rules deliberately, as in a game: was accused of cheating at cards.
Informal To be sexually unfaithful: cheat on a spouse.
Baseball To position oneself closer to a certain area than is normal or expected: The shortstop cheated toward second base.
;) | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 7:54:07 PM | Oh, god... you're one of those?
I HATE dictionary arguments. They rarely take the colloquial into account.
Plus, at least look up the correct word if you're going to play the game-
Cheating
v. intr.
1. To act dishonestly; practice fraud.
2. To violate rules deliberately, as in a game: was accused of cheating at cards.
3. Informal- To be sexually unfaithful: cheat on a spouse.
4. Baseball To position oneself closer to a certain area than is normal or expected: The shortstop cheated toward second base. | |
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| Your partner gets a lap dance from a stripper, is that cheating?
Posted: 5/22/2007 9:15:28 PM | Why go to the strip club, when he can give me the money and I will give him one, plus more!
I understand it is a visual thing for men, but I have gone to a strip club before with a boyfriend . Wanted to see and learn what it was about . I wonder why men pay women to tease them and then go home alone? It all seems depressing to me. Like waving the candy in your face, but you can't have it. Yes, it would bother me. I feel strip clubs are for lonely, single guys. | |
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