| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/9/2008 1:42:41 PM | hmmm Major turnoffs not listed in the first post
1) superior attitude; in my line of work (hospitality) it is pretty much a job requirement to be chatty and friendly to anyone and everyone. I freaquently see women being hostile and/or dismissive of almost any male who makes an effort to speak to them. (please note this is not a generalisation against all women, just pointing out how SOME women are). This tends to be worse with more attractive women, but sometimes true of unattractive ones
2) Indecisive women/people pleasers; I have dated women before who find it almost impossible to say no to people (will go to see a movie they hate because they daren't ask if whoever they're going with would like to see something instead) or quietly go along with something they don't like then **** about it later. Some when asked which movie they would like to see would simply reply "I'm not bothered" when I've asked them what they want to see so we could find something we BOTH liked. A relationship is supposed to be about two people together, not one allowing the other to boss them around and make all thier decisions for them!
3) Fake femminists; Women who will pipe up about sexual discrimination against women (unequal pay, unfair treatment, shovenism) but still expect men to pay for them everywhere they go, and are perfectly happy for men to be discriminated against.
for me those 3 are not just turn offs as far as being sexually interested in a person are concerned, but they would prevent me from being friends with them too. | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/14/2008 12:02:26 PM | | I put "Looking for an honest man" in my title and that is what appeals to me, honesty. So many people out there, including women, are not honest and quite honestly, I just don't want to waste my precious time with people who can't be upfront about themselves. | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/22/2008 10:20:35 PM | Just trying to target the stuff that women may not be aware of!
= High maintinance =
To women this often means "classy" To men it means "you can't afford my maintinance costs"
=Must be professional= Women often list this when what they really mean is "must NOT be a moron." In fact many many non professionals are also not morons.
= Must be, must have, must like"=
Woman is too much a demeanding intolerant control freak. | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/22/2008 10:23:21 PM | | constantly wide eyes, a weak chin, or that thing where she has too much gums and not enough of an upper lip. girls who keep clinging to you when you try to sleep. girls who tell dumb jokes and look at you like you're supposed to laugh. girls who do this weird breathy laugh when they say something they think is witty, like they're signaling to you that they made a funny. | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/22/2008 11:27:33 PM | Ok, here's several. Arrogance, no sense of humor, expecting the guy to do all the pleasing ie. there are women out there who think gracing us with their presence is all they need to do, thinking the world revolves around yourselves and how you are feeling at the moment, golddigging, bad maners, spitting, talking about what everyone else in the bar/resteuraunt/pick a place is wearing or doing. Really most guys aren't gonna care unless its something really funny. This is huge. Get ready.... We are not mindreaders! How am I to know that my point of view about something is going to make you angry?! Especially if we've just met! Another huge one...Thinking you are always right! If someone is wrong they should admit so while looking into the eyes of whomever they are speaking with.
I used to get angry about these and any other number of crazy personality traits. Now I just walk away, because I know I'm not going to change a personality. (There is one to0 ladies-love someone for who they are not who you want them to be) The need to know what every celeb in the world is doing/thinking/eating/drinking is a complete mystery to me, and a quick way to lose attention.
Someone who says they don't lie. You are lying right now. We know this. Along the same line: Do not ask a question you don't want to know the answer to! Number of past sexual partners etc. Oh and by the way if the ex=boyfriend was so great why aren't you with him?
Sadly many men don't hold women accountable when they act like above or any other number of things. Instead of just pointing things out I'll offer a solution: The next time someone you are dating/talking to/trying to pick up etc. does something or says something falling into the relm of crazy or rude ask them point blank but politley, how they would feel if they were being treated like that. I've tried it, it works. Forgive the spelling. It's 2:30am and I have insomnia. | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/22/2008 11:30:01 PM | Any statement, joking or otherwise, about having to 'earn it' or threats to withhold as punishment. Instant turnoff that can last days or weeks. No one will manipulate, or even make jokes about manipulating me, with promises of sexual favours or threats of withholding.
General Protip: If you withhold, chances are he will get it somewhere else eventually. Not a recommended relationship punishment method. | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/23/2008 9:00:52 PM | Tip for dating a model railroader: Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT call the trains 'cute'.
They aren't toys either. Thomas The Tank Engine trains are toys, OUR trains, are scale models.
I just had to get this off my chest. Yes, I do feel much better now.  | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/24/2008 8:03:23 AM |
but what other things really turn you off a woman quick fast? stuff she might not even be aware of, or aware that you find unappealing????
People with control issues
People who have codependent tendencies
People who want you to jump through hoops to prove you are "worthy" to date them (Usually it's a power play)
People who have actions that are consistently inconsistent with their words
People who cannot laugh at themselves nor admit they are ever wrong
People who waste your time as they aren't really interested or willing to date, they just have an ax to grind
People who carry over baggage from a previous relationship and dump it on your lap to prove that "you are not like the last jerk"
People who lie about the looks & money issue (Men know the score about looks and money, we aren't offended by the truth of it and how the world works, we are offended by the lies often told because it sounds "good" and sounds "politically correct") | |
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Mr H2O
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Joined: 10/31/2006
Msg: 288 | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/24/2008 9:13:45 AM | Here's a major turn off that I see all over this site -- poorly thought out profiles.
I'm going to assume that most women wait to be contacted and that most guys make the first move. Now, I know (because I read a lot of profiles) that there are a ton of women out there who are annoyed by one line emails. That's totally fair. Saying, "hello, you're cute" is basically like saying nothing at all. But a fair amount of the time, I see the same women who ask for a detailed response giving very little in the way of direction.
Either their profiles are amazingly short, which tells you nothing or they're just a list of adjectives. In a lot of ways, the list is even worse. Writing that you are funny isn't the same as being funny, and honestly, it doesn't even tell me what kind of jokes you might like. Not that you have to write a joke. But at least describe your humor a little. Do you like dark humor? Are you a slapstick kind of gal? What? If you can't do that, at least tell me some movies or TV shows you find funny.
The point is, it's a turn off when someone creates a profile that tells you next to nothing about them. What's the point?
Think of it this way. If you were in a bar, you'd likely get tons of guys are aren't even close to what you're looking for because you don't share similar outlooks, interests and backgrounds. Or, maybe you're looking for the exact opposite in all those categories. But in the bar, we'd never know where you stood on any of this.
On the other hand, the whole point of online dating is to cut through a lot of that stuff. I know some guys write to any woman they think is cute in a 100 mile radius. Call it casting a very wide net. That's not me, and I don't think that's a lot of guys. But we do need something to go on. I can't tell you how many times I've seen a cute girl's photo, clicked on her profile and seen the same stock description. That's so boring. And there's no point in writing to her because you have no idea if you're even close to what she's looking for. On the other hand, I will say that when a woman gives me a lot of detail about who she is and who she's looking for, and I decide to write, we usually end up going out on a date. Sometimes we click and sometimes we don't, but I've never been miserable.
Why? We both wrote a profile that tells the community who we are. Hiding behind a list of adjectives or saying very little is a turn off. | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/29/2008 11:13:28 AM | The most common social traits I see that turn me off:
1-No social skills - ie girl can't speak in complete sentneces
2-Has nothing coherent to say that doesn't involve reality TV or fashion.
3-Materialistic whore
4-Self absorbed snob
5-Treats men like walking ATM's | |
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| Guys - what are major turn off's for you that we WOULDNT guess at?
Posted: 5/29/2008 6:49:50 PM | constantly clearing her throat or giving out other very slight but perceptable sounds in her mouth (sucking air in though her teeth, etc.)
sitting with her legs apart, expecially if she's got a great set -- commonness turns me off.
going on dates and covering every square inch of her skin, up to her chin, down to her wrists and down to her feet.
wearing tights. I can't stand those leg-tight tights. especially if it's tiger- or leopard-skin patterned.
Wearing tights to whereever she goes. I met two women like that, good looking, tall, Jewish women. The tight business was really awful. One had great looking legs, and she completely ruined the appeal because she wore those damn tights always. And I bet you anything that both had several closetsful of skirts, dresses, silks, cottons, sheers, pentihose, socks and maybe even stockings. I asked one of them if she would consider varying her leg coverings a bit; she just about killed me with her look, and she never talked to me again. Oh, and she was wearing those sleeve-less Michelin-man jackets. She looked like a tank, and she could have been so beautiful if she only gave one hoot about her femininity. She could not shut up about her ex-husband, either. Both these women were erudite, smart, literary, and great to talk to.
I especially hate it when she deletes my emails without even reading it.
I hate it when she reads my email then she immediately deletes it.
I hate it when she reads my email but doesn't reply.
I hate it when she replies only to turn me down.
I hate it when she replies and doesn't turn me down, but says no to dates.
I hate it when she goes out on a date (both of them, in my ten years of cyber-dating) and she doesn't follow through.
drooling.
(I went out with a drooler once. Her chin was shiny-wet the entire evening. And she was good looking! She invited me up after the date, and I did not know whether to throw up or to get in the mood.) | |
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