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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/21/2007 11:01:47 AM | | ok.........that was the weirdest thing i've ever read but yet it makes so much sence lol....never would have used santa clause but wow that was pretty good.................i'm not fighting with anybody i just feel like i'm being attacked by everyone on here. i feel like people are getting the wrong idea about me. i'm sorry if i mad anybody mad i'm just sticking up for what i believe in that is all. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/21/2007 11:10:03 AM | | No one is attacking you. You asked for points of view, and you're getting them. You may not necessarily agree with them, but surely that is the point of a forum such as this? | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/21/2007 11:13:13 AM | | well....yea i'm getting them but i was hopeing for someone to lend me some helpful advice then saying i'm to young to be worring about love and to young to be falling in love. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/21/2007 11:17:56 AM | | You're NOT too young to be falling in love, but you ARE too young to be taking it seriously. That is just the opinion of one 43 year old woman who has been in love herself. All I am saying is that you have plenty of time to find Ms Right. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/21/2007 12:33:07 PM | its true that attraction plays a big part but its easy to be put off someone you find attractive because they are TOO nice or put somenoe off by being TOO nice, i think this is down to human nature.
people want what they cant have and their never satisfied with what comes easy.  | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/21/2007 1:06:15 PM | | I dont think women dump men because they are too nice! Women end 80% of relationships anyway and quite often they are dishonest or even confused themselves as too why they want to split (i think). However its definately true that overcrowding a women or leeching on to her will defo make her run, she needs to be small but important part of the bigger picture, the bigger picture being you life. Don't forget your a man and real men dont act like wusses. But you will always hear of cases where some bloke is cheating on his missus and she keeps coming back, i even know women who stay in a abusive relationship, theres alot of factors involved in relationships, its not just as black and white as "being too nice". | |
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JustRo
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Joined: 12/4/2005
Msg: 235 | |
| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/21/2007 1:07:29 PM | Simply because one is nice....male or female is just not enough. Being rich isnt enough but it defenately helps smooth out some bumps for awhile. Being good looking isnt enough neither... at first it is but wears out quickly after a bit.
The main thing, find someone compatible and dont settle for less. If you do then you will find yourself saying... "I WANT OUT" Just don't be with someone cause you don't want to be alone. When you settle you will find that you still feel alone because you do not have what you want.
Ro | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/24/2007 11:35:11 PM | Just my two cents man,
Some women recognize strength and character not just in who you are, or who you're trying to be, but also, your inner strength and character.
I've read a quote "character is only determined by what you do when no one is watching"
If you don't have an identity of your own man, nothing to talk about, nothing to share, nothing particularly unique about you, what makes you 'above average' ? There's plenty of guys out there with morals.. and there's plenty of nice guys that have money etc etc.. I've seen the richest nice guys being the poorest quality of people because they're utterly, experience-less!
When I say identity.. When the love of your life is describing you to your friends, what things would she brag you up about after they figure out you love her?
I can think of ten ideas.. see if you can get where I'm coming from. These would give any woman bragging rights she'd tell all her friends about..
1) You're a fantastic cook. (so take some cooking classes lol)
2) You're an avid reader/writer and you have such great conversations about it.. (get it? Read something interesting. The library is free)
3) You're a great skier, mountain climber, football player, baseball player, golfer, (you get the picture you sports nut, you)
4) You're big into the health scene (Join a gym, take her jogging, make friends and pipes)
5) You work a great job, you work hard, and you're successful. (more about status than money)
6) "I know nothing about cars, but my boyfriend is real good at fixing them (interested in mechanics? You're useful, and it's a bragging right for her)
7) "you should hear him sing/play banjo/piano/guitar, etc he's awesome" (brag brag brag) - don't underestimate any forms of expression on that one.. trust me..
8) He's such a softie.. his kitty cat is such a suck (dumb pet tricks.. spend time with your cat LOL)
9) He's been to Asia, Africa, Malaysia, Germany, Italy, France, London, Paris, (take a trip!)
10) He's totally NUTS! (run with the bulls once in Pamplona.. live to tell the tale young buck.. every scar is experience hehe)
Dude, it's not always about 'nice' it's about what she finds in you for substance, experience, and uniqueness from everyone else! Whatever ya do, don't sit and grumble..
keep living life, and the experience will get you the girl.. you've already got the right attitude towards women. Now take on some life stories.
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 4:36:04 PM | They get dumped for the same reason that
MEN dump WOMEN who are too nice to them.
Spelling Lesson:
To - Proposition as in: "I will go to the store."
Too - adverb as in: "I need to go, too." | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 5:06:41 PM | Spelling Lesson:
To - Proposition as in: "I will go to the store."
Too - adverb as in: "I need to go, too."
One of the quickest ways for me to be turned off ( after no picture, or "looking for a good friend first") is to read a profile, where homophones are consistently misused, as in "I am going two the store to, too get to things" , or "Their just trying to protect theirselves, otherwise, they'd lose all they're stuff from the trailer home"
As to the topic. If you try too hard, you seem desperate and needy, and that's probably because you are desperate and needy. Life is not like the "Pretty in Pink" movies, where if the nerd hung around and was a "good puppy" long enough, the homecoming queen would go out with him, and that event, in itself, would validate his existence.
The truth is, no one really understands initial attraction. It is, or it isn't, and if she's not attracted to you as a man, all "hanging around being nice" will accomplish, is becoming one of her girlfriends. So, boo*hoo, she doesn't want you. Get over it, and move on. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 5:31:02 PM | Sadly, I truly believe the majority of women are always seeking something "better" - even if she's deeply attracted to the guy. It's a very bizarre process - treat her nice, she leaves you, treat her bad, she stays.
And yes, there are many other reasons - but from reading many forums, most women state that being too nice is boring, troublesome, irritating, repiticious, etc.
What can you do huh? Either find that 1 in every 10,000 sincere woman, or change your stripes and become what you are not if who you are isn't working. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 5:32:33 PM | What you said is quiet true, how you put it was a bit harsh. I can still go your way somewhat with harsh, that being, only if the man moans and groans constantly about, "Why a did she go?". You must build your confidence up and keep your head up. If she does not want you, then let her go, forcing the issue will only put a huge gulf between you and her.
The same goes for the ladies, not all men are saints you know!
~Sneaks | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 5:37:30 PM | Dude,
I am not quite certain why there is so much cause for envy and anger, you see we all have our own personalities and we sometimes click with certain people and we sometimes do not. In fact, a chemistry, can be equated to eperiences- backgrounds and not so much in the physical laws of attraction. It's kind of like soft intelligence and if the rest of the package is there, it will evolve, this does not mean that you are meant to be together.
Timing in peoples lives are key, maturity and direction of two people are also key components, for this reason when a a man or a woman get to know each other, why do you think that is, it is to find out if they connect or if there is chemistry, meaning background, current and future goals. Our personalities are shaped from experiences, although our personalities will change to a few degrees in our lives, basically we remain the same.
Some people choose to be angry for competitive reasons , yet the absolute reason behind this , are insecurites from within, which is a control issue which also suggests confidence and self-esteem challenges.
Yet no matter what in life, we will all meet someone that we can connect with, regardless of our challenges. The key is to find yourself first and than we will know what we really need, as long as we are truthful from within, as than the real person will come out and that is where the atttraction will progress.
Women are nurturers by nature and they can feel what men do not feel and therefore, they know if a man is real or not, providing they are comfortable with themselves from within and are seeking a relationship for healthy reasons and this applies to men also.
Thanks,
Perry | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 5:39:05 PM | I agree with alot of the ladies on this site except one.
Some women who reject men that purchasing them everything is because they feel he is weak or easily manipulatable. It is best to show his effections for her through his words, and support when all hell in her life is going wrong. It is nice on special occasions for gift, but not 24/7. If you spoil something, it's never what you expected it to be later, because greed kicks in and even thou it was good intentins turns out wrong.
Now, other women have been used for so long or hurt so many times, she doesn't realize a good thing, until she looses it. I believe therapy would be the best for both parties, one would be why she does what she does and the other is why he feels he needs to buy her love. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 5:52:25 PM | Hi Mary.
Just some insight here, I grew up as a foster child and was beaten by women as a child and I have no anger or resentment towards them as I was in several foster homes. I had my nose broken and my left arm broken as a child.
In fact I love women and also understand women who are angry and women who are not, yet we all have choices and it is our morality as a human being which will foster your environment and your inner circles.
It is not okay to beat a woman and nor is it okay to beat a man or a child and if people think that an eye is for an eye when it comes to this, than I am very happy that I am not blind and believe that people should learn to mentor other people and themselves so that this will not create more anger by confirming actions by promoting violence as this is one of the very reasons why relationships in our world today, do not seem to last for alot of folks.
All negative attributes and actions is what will grow our future generations, so for those of whom have children and promote anger as a conflict resolution, chances are high that our children will grow up duplicating abusive environments as a result of our own reactions and actions to our experiences.
Certainly, nobody wants that in our own children, so it starts with us as Adults.
If we as people could only look at every experience as a learning one, we would be alot more successful and so would our peers. as this would transcend upward and downward in the hiearchy of life for generations to come.
Thanks,
Perry | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 5:54:42 PM |
It’s really too bad that the only persecute for a relationship is, being NICE. What a pleasant world it would be.
YUCK!
I do want to be nice to the woman, who is "my" woman, sometimes, but sometimes, I want her to know that I want to drag her by the hair into the bedroom, and "have my way" with her. I want and need the passion, and the animal drive between us.
Nice is "nice" with co workers and friends, but a man and a woman has to have fire and passion that is in response to a deeper, sexual drive, or else it's boring. I don't want a woman to think I'm "nice". I want her to know that I am man, and she is woman, and so it shall be. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 6:51:04 PM | Mmm...cos they don'y want someone to be 'nice' to them, all too simplistic I know but...
I don't get it myself, maybe I'm just really bad at incoming messages but my experience is that the women I've been 'nice' to want a 'bad boy' and the women I've been a bad boy with want nicey nicey...J****s my head.
People are just different, looking for and wanting different things in their relationships,keep practicing, enjoy the ride. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 7:02:32 PM | | I read an article about this, and it had to do with what us guys can do and what women can't do. Us guys can step out the door and do anything we want at any time, day or night and feel safe, women can't. So if your a women ,you have to be always careful and watch what you do. What kind of life is that? Which means a rather dull shutin existance so what happens when a bad boy shows up and offers freedom , excitment adventure, that's right they go for it. Nice guts finish last not because it's there fault girls just want to shed the shackles of there lives. Now if a girl was built like Arnold Shwarzanagor? whole new ballgame. Nice guys would finish first. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 7:04:03 PM |
I don't get it myself, maybe I'm just really bad at incoming messages but my experience is that the women I've been 'nice' to want a 'bad boy' and the women I've been a bad boy with want nicey nicey...J****s my head.
People are just different, looking for and wanting different things in their relationships,keep practicing, enjoy the ride.
There are millions and millions of women "out there". Find one who is compatible with your nature, as you are, instead of trying to figure out who she wants you to be. The "nice" women, looking for a "niece" quiet predictable relationship, where everything is always nice, bore me. If that's what you want, there are plenty of them out there, who want sex once a month, whether you need it or not, and want to tell you what to do, and have you do it, etc.. Also, of course, not for me. | |
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| Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/29/2007 8:41:50 PM |
Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
OK.
One - nice guys tend to present like wusses to women, so no physical attraction. Sorry guys, it's the sad, sorry truth. What they SAY they want is NOT what they want. They may actually LIKE you, but they will not, in most cases, FEEL attracted to you, and without that, no nooky, brother. It's unconscious, they can NOT help it. Accept it. Love them for it. They are only being women, who are, consequently, attracted to men.
Two - and this one can be problematic, unless you just take it for what it is - too many women spend too much time in their heads, worrying about nonsense, like , "I don't want to be responsible for his happiness," and crap like that. Basically, that means that if you are too over the top in love, you come on like a needy jerk, and they won't be interested. Sorry, life strikes again. It scares them. They want a man who has a life and doesn't really NEED them. I know, it makes no sense at all, but it's true. Accept it. Love them for it. They are WOMEN, and different from us. WOWIE, Ricky Henderson! I love it.
I can look back on my life and see how, when I was aligned with life and acting according to the laws of attraction, I scored a lot. When I "fell in love" and became a "nice guy" I lost. Fit to sh*t, gimme a hit. But it's true.
It's not our fault, guys, and it's not the women's fault. It's the psycho-babble and the feminists who hate men, and all the others, and even your mom and your sisters who told you what they thought was right, but it isn't, because what they told you was the feminine view wrapped in what they thought was right. But it wasn't. Why? Because they are NOT men.
In fact, this is the source of all the problems. This is why women go for jerks. Jerks exhibit confidence, aloofness and challenge - the manly traits. The gals can't help it.
Good news - you don't have to be a jerk, because they really do NOT like jerks.
But, you DO have to be a man, and not fall to pieces if she doesn't make a big deal over you. Be a gent, treat her like a lady, but take absolutely NO CRAP.
Now, go, get some. | |
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