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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 5:38:37 AM | I met them pretty quick... as there was no point in building any relationship, spending time talking to someone that I could not see face to face. After that and seeing if they were a freak, social retard, emotionally unbalanced or not. then I would decide if I would talk to them some more.
In my experience 95% of the people severly misportraed themslves... most in both looks and personality. I found only about 2% actually dateable.
Usually I would chat with someone briefly... a few times... and then if I felt ok with the phone calls I would meet them in a coffee date setting or casual interview... ALWAYS IN PUBLIC.... and talk about 20-30 minutes.
I only had 2 guys who showed up that were so hideous I just left..... and 95 %
got blown off after the first meeting.
A few I saw a few times more only to find out they were not exactly what I was looking for, so I stopped wasting time with them.... and all communication.
I finally did meet someone and he is far better than I ever dreamed... a fair, honest, balanced man... with a good job, no mental or physical issues... not jaded or on drugs...
* if I didnt do it this way....
I don't know what horridness would have let marks in my life... ... as there sure is some horrid... utterly out of touch with reality types out there. | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 9:34:41 AM |
....for some ridiculous reason ppl do, and can behave very differently online as to when you meet them in person.
Thats because on 't' internet, people have time to think about what their resonse will be , time to think how to build a reply / comment for maximum effect - people dont really type as fast as they think...
in real life , a lot of people tend to engage mouth before brain ......... | |
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TeJay
| | Joined: 1/16/2007
Msg: 29 | |
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matisa
| | Joined: 5/26/2007
Msg: 31 | |
| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 9:49:07 AM | Me personally met the luv of my life online,but not on this site..
U have to know the person well before u met then,so that u don't be dissapponited..
One thing about online dating is quiet strange cuz it's true u never know when u met the person whether if there will be any chemistry or not...
So just wait till she offer to met u first and don't ask for any contact inf,she'll give it to u when she's feeling comfy enough..
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 9:54:27 AM | The sooner the better for me. The longer you wait the more you tend to fall for the 'image' you have in your head of that person. The image includes a promise of chemistry or you wouldn't be spending the time getting to know them. Odds are against you that upon meeting he/she will be able to live up to that image.
And then sometimes they're just really bad kissers....  | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 9:58:04 AM | It depends, I think, on the physical distance between the two of you... I have spent 3-4 months and as little as a week. You know, if you're really excited/interested about/in someone, you want to meet them as soon as possible...
@piano4te - Dude... I like short burst sprints on the beach and punching cows... wanna' wrestle? I keed, I keed! Don't give up man, you have so much going for you... like being sexy cool... and ... and.... knowing how to play the piano, maybe?
the giggleparts - Trust me, I look a lot better in the dark... | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:04:55 AM | I try to meet as soon as possible. Usually within 1 to 2 weeks max. Long distance I will wait as much as a month for obvious reasons. I pretty much avoid long distance however.
I have found that meeting is the only way to really know anything about chemistry, body language, etc. People can be whoever they want to in emails and often not the reality. Phone calls okay, but in the end meeting is the best way--just like the way we used to do it!
Also I have found that most nearby men who took longer than 2 weeks to meet were in another relationship or dating many women or something. They take longer to find the 'time' to meet because they have to hide the meeting from their significant other or find a time to squeeze me in... There are exceptions, especially for those who travel a lot--but in most cases taking more than 2 weeks is a red flag for me. | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:07:00 AM | attraction to pic/profile != email chemistry
email chemistry != phone chemistry
phone chemistry != attraction in person..
sooooooooooooooo not true in my books!! Most I've met we'd obviously had online/phone chemistry for it to get to the point of meeting, but no chemistry upon meeting. The above is NOT a given!
AND... you can "feel" it all you want... but it all comes down to what's actual upon meeting | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:08:31 AM | | how long would i like to talk online before meeting in person when the young lady if im lucky to get some one , s ready and comfortable i give my heart away to easy so im not really the corrispondent on this subject if i three months talking on here swap phone numbers after three months meet up for light lunch | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:09:19 AM | Well for me i'd say at least a couple of months which will be when i finally meet the man that ive been talking to since May 10th. We plan to meet at the beginning of July when i take my holidays starting July 6th.
I hope by then that we will have gotten to know each other better and i plan to have my sons with me ages 9 and 15 so i wont be alone. I know some of u will say thats stupid to bring them along but it was going to be a family holiday anyways and he plans to bring his daughter along too who is 13 yrs old.
If neither of us have any trust in each other then what a waste of time we did getting to know each other for the last two months. I suppose im just one of those people that puts a lot of trust into people too easily but im always afraid that this man could be the one who got away if i dont go for it. | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:11:07 AM |
attraction to pic/profile != email chemistry
email chemistry != phone chemistry
phone chemistry != attraction in person..
sooooooooooooooo not true in my books!! Most I've met we'd obviously had online/phone chemistry for it to get to the point of meeting, but no chemistry upon meeting. The above is NOT a given!
AND... you can "feel" it all you want... but it all comes down to what's actual upon meeting
Actually, see that exclamation point by the equals sign? That is a programming convention that actually means 'not equal'... | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:18:00 AM | | I usually like them to call me pretty soon after the first email. Otherwise, it just dwindles away. I like to meet after a couple calls. Otherwise, it just doesn't seem like there is much interest. My pictures are 2 weeks old, and they look like me. If you think I'm lying, I'm not interested in that mess, get lost!!!!!!! I've been through too many rows with too many cynics, I'm not interested in any problems. Why people think because they had a problem once, they get to blame it on me. Life is life. You win some, you lose some. Get over it!!!! | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:19:43 AM | i have met guys after speaking for just a week and ive met guys who ive spoke to for months.
my opinion is the guys who are in a hurry are usually the players.
but also agree with what others are saying you can meet someone in a pub and spend months getting to know them and find you dont click.
anyhow there is nothing wrong with having online buddies in this day. | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:25:44 AM | I prefer to meet quickly, usually after 3 e-mails. I strike while the
Iron is Hot, for a few reasons.
Now I write fantastic e-mails. and I’ll usually spark something pretty soon
in the first few. so i meet earlier due to I want to see how interested she is in ME.
1) don’t want to waste time.
2) loss of interest after a few weeks/months.
3) competition. joins every day on POF.
4) Darn it, i just don’t want to type that long.
5) if you know to much, about other person your first date, can be
low on conversation topics. (depending on the two people)
I also am not looking for dates / relationships, but rather friends
if something sparks then wonderful. if not, then i have a new friend.
gives both sides a “less pressure Vibe”.
BUT i’m million times better in REAL LIFE, then on screen.
at first a little reserved, but still Fun. 
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 10:31:12 AM | ..well typically i take a fair amount of time...( im not purposely looking for LTR) but still take my time, it can be dangerous out there, so until i know someone well enough to feel comfortable, i dont rush it.
2. i have know someone nearly 2 yrs, we are friends, but never met, distance was a factor, and also to many red flags for more than friendship.
3. ive known someone a couple weeks and wanted to meet him this week if possible.
that was the soonest though. | |
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Sigi
| | Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 45 | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 12:03:20 PM | | I am looking for a long term relationship ,not a phone relationship and not an email relationship .I usually like to talk on the phone within a couple of days of the first email and usually try to meet within the first week to two weeks . I have done a couple of the long distance relationships and I hated it because I was the one who did all the driving so now I won't consider meeting anyone further then 75 miles away . | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 12:05:42 PM | | I'm not a big e-mailing person. And I also believe you get to know alot more about that person over a phone. If you hit it off over the phone, then as soon as possible. The quicker you meet the sooner you'll know is he for me or have I just gotten carpal tunnel system from practiically writing a book to someone who I ain't got the hots for in person? | |
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| how long would you like to talk online before meeting in person
Posted: 6/3/2007 12:20:22 PM | The reason I ask this is because there are alot of people out here that when you talk on line it sounds very good. But when you actually meet in person. Well things just don't seem to click. If you spent months talking then would that be seen as alot of wasted time. Due to the fact you are looking for a partner in life. Not a online buddy.
I agree with the above quote.
As you can see I could not figure how to quote it properly.
I like to meet within a week or so. There really is no way to know if you will click with a person till you meet them in person. | |
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