| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/12/2007 12:10:42 AM | 41 years and never been married. Been in two long term relationships. One was a common law type the other was not a living together situation. Don't really believe in the institution of marriage (don't really like the idea of institutions at all). I believe that if two people want to be together they will be. If you manage to go through all the changes (good and bad) that come up in life together then you have done something the majority of folks haven't. In my past relationship experiences we came to many forks in the road and for the most part travelled down the same roads, but when we choose different paths the choices were simpler because we weren't married. We met as adults and seperated the same way. No lawyers! Amicable and mature. There was some bitterness and some sadness but no resentment or vindictiveness. I am still friends with both my ex's.
Some folks need to have the structure that an institution provides, some of us don't. I heard a comedian describe being single as 5% loneliness and despair and 95% bliss. As a fish I like to just go with the flow. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/12/2007 12:27:16 AM | Someplace said
Often I feel outta place on this site. As I've found that most people, 35+ on a dating site have been married at least once, and are on their 2nd go around. Or they're people that just keep jumping from relationship to relationship.
Lets not generalize the never been married people, almost all of my friends marriages were over a lot sooner than most of my relationships, and I've never vowed to spend the rest of my life with someone in front of my friends and family then break that promise.
The original post by muziklover sounds like it could have been written by me. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/12/2007 2:21:22 AM | Well I am in this 'club', 'group', 'status' or whatever else may be applicable only for one reason. I am fully capable of commitment and enjoy life in many aspects. Being flexible with time and spontaneous and adventurous has allowed me to learn much about the world, cultures and life in general.
I had a few very long relationships and lived common-law once. But I was also engaged once to my high school sweetheart when we met a second time. The one reason why I have remained single is because too many people are selfish now. There is no romance or special spark. Last time I went to a bar, I just wanted a beer and wound up having three ladies (from the past) try to tell me that they should have married me?
My fiance passed away 6 months before our wedding.
The funny part is most have been married and divorced and some with children now as well. Suddenly I see that they are kind of jealous because I have no baggage. I will agree that being a single, divorced or separated parent REALLY sucks and my heart goes out to those who are trying to make ends meet without giving up.
Almost all of my past relationships or ex-girlfriends still talk to me.. I guess I was always easy to get along with. On my , I'm still surprised of the response from ladies I've dated.
I just believe when it happens it will happen - just hasn't happened yet. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/12/2007 12:22:04 PM | I am 32 years old and have never been married before, with no kids. I have been engaged though. I believe I am just now getting at the right age to be thinking of marriage. However, in my town, people think if you're 25 and have never been married before, then you must be gay. Well, I'm definitely not gay, so what else is wrong..lol???
I think people in larger cities tend to marry later in life, because there are so many things to do and there are more "professional" career oriented people who want to be established first before settling down. Definitely nothing wrong with that. In a small town, sort of like where I live, people marry much earlier in life. I'd say that at least 60% of people in this town are married by the time they reach 21 years old.
That isn't a good fit for people like myself. I am 32, and want to meet a nice, young, attractive girl who hasn't been married before and doesn't have children either. The problem is, those girls are few and far between. I don't necessarily want to move, because I like where I live. I am also close to my family, and I feel it's important for me to be close to them since they are older. So, anyways, I'm just glad that I am not the only one who is still single in every sense of the word and is over 30. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/14/2007 7:39:11 PM |  Just so you know thats not bad. I'm 35 nearly 36 and have never been married or engaged . Women usally ask how is it you've NEVER been married . I just tell them I hadn't found the right one YET !!! HERES THE SAYING I GET..... "the right one WILL come along when its time " I hear that regular  | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/15/2007 12:03:41 AM | | I'm 37 and never married. I do have a wonderful son... age 17. After having him, I knew I didn't want to bring men in and out of his life. I was in one serious relationship when he was about 7 or 8 years old and when that relationship ended, we were both hurt.... wasn't worth it. I don't know if I will ever get married... I have hopes to. But... if it happens, it happens... if it doesn't, it doesn't. I'm not desperate... and I'm not lonely. I'm just waiting it out to see if God sends me someone. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/15/2007 12:10:47 PM | I am 42 and never been married.
Never been asked for the right reason..
Still live in hope though
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/15/2007 7:03:40 PM | | I am 33 and I have never been married. I have had 2 brief relationships which neither worked out. I like to find someone but there is a part of me that does wonder if I ever will find that special someone. It's true the older you get the harder it is to find someone. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/15/2007 10:51:48 PM | What about 33, never married, no children, and no girlfriend. Ever. Does that make me a mutant or just really unlucky? I am beginning to wonder.. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/16/2007 5:34:09 AM | | I hear you there. I sometimes wonder if I am just unlucky myself. The way I see it is if a women can't accept you for who you are then they aren't worth it. I won't change for anyone as should any of us single people. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/16/2007 8:00:08 AM | | I'm 37 and never married. I have been engaged 4 or 5 times though, but could not go through with any of them. After some soul searching, I realized I was in love with the idea of being in love, not the men. I do want to marry, but it has to be the right guy - I won't settle. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/16/2007 11:01:37 AM | I'm 37 and never married or ever engaged. I just never anyone that I wanted to with.
I'm just delighted that I had a chance to have a child, rather than the settling down thing. That would have killed me. Even though I'm happy with just one child.
I know of two friends, one is in an on/off relationship since 1990, they are engaged with a 2 yo girl, and it's off now, but she's not taking off/giving back the ring. That would just drive me around the bend. I would rather be on my own. Very confusing for the child.
Another friend is engaged to a guy good bit younger, she has a kid from former relationship, and she says to me nearly every time I talk to her, she shouldn't be with him let alone thinking of marrying him.
Better to be on your own, than staying with someone because it "looks" good I say. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 8/18/2007 12:52:16 PM | I have never been married, engaged or had a long term relationship.
I'd love to find a nice lady to get married to.
any offers??? | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 10/25/2007 8:22:59 PM | | As much as I am trying to stay positive it can be frustrating still being single at this stage in my life. Maybe I was meant to be single forver. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 10/25/2007 10:36:18 PM | SOLE SOUL
I'M ALMOST 40 AND NEVER MARRIED! THAT'S ME! NO KIDS, EITHER! WOW...NOT THE LAST CHILDLESS, NEVER MARRIED 30-SOMETHING-ER ON EARTH. I JUST WON'T JUMP INTO A RELATIONSHIP OR MARRIAGE. BESIDES IF I JUMP, I MIGHT HURT MYSELF. I'D RATHER STROLL INTO "THE" RELATIONSHIP AND/OR MARRIAGE. SO, IF IT TAKES MORE TIME, I GUESS I'VE GOT IT...BEING A SPINSTER AND ALL!
DAVID_IN_ESSEX - IF YOU READ THIS AFTER 2 MONTHS OF NOT POSTING, THEN BELIEVE THIS - OUR TIME WILL COME! :) | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 10/26/2007 7:50:20 AM | Hey all my fellow over 30 never been marrieds!
I'm 36 never been married (or even engaged) and no kids, but it isn't so much that I was taking my time to find the right person as the OP alludes to, or being traumatized by divorced parents (still going stong after 43 years) as other posters listed.
The main reason was I had a late start in life. I was very shy and introverted while young and even actually into my late 20's. It took me a long time to find out who I was and to accept that person.
Now that I know who I am and what I want, I'm not willing to settle for anything less. Why should I? Why should anyone?
I'm enjoying my life and if the right man happens along GREAT, but if he doesn't, like some lady poster mentioned that a single friend of hers said, "I'm strong enough to live a single life!"
Good luck to those of you searching for the 'right' one and best wishes to those of you who choose to live the single life indefinitely.  | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 10/26/2007 10:33:14 PM | | Come on people. Stop whining and suck it up. If I can make it to 45 without ever having been close to being married, and without even really trying, it can't be that difficult. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 10/27/2007 9:34:27 AM | | I share your outlook on life. I've had many great relationships. But for one reason or another they turned out not to be my life partner or partner for life. But I haven't given up searching. | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 10/27/2007 12:30:59 PM | I lost my mother when i was a baby so wasn't brought up in a married life, my dad re married when i was 15 years old maybe that is why I am not married .
but my dad remarried when he was 60 so I'm still not past it yet  | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 10/28/2007 2:39:23 PM | my first reply to one of these forums...! i'm 35 next year and i don't really feel much different to when i was 25, 'cept i get paid more, have a house and a car (and the bills that go with 'em!) and i've seen a bit of the world. feel a bit wiser... but i just havent met anyone either. I've had a few girls in my past that I split from because I didnt want the 'marry go normal' thing in my early or mid-20's. moving too fast, that kindof thing. Then they went and married the next guy they met. So did they want me, or just anyone, as long as they were married and secure is that all they wanted? That to me seems to be missing out on some other things like REALLY wanting to be with THAT person, not just ANYONE... Maybe I'm just too idealistic. and getting older isn't going to help! it's a big subject, well, if you're like me and thinks it is! 
I dunno. In the meantime, I'm just going to get on with it. Maybe one day I'll get lucky.  | |
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| 30 and never married?
Posted: 10/28/2007 8:37:56 PM | I don't believe there's a "too idealistic" of anything, Rockwell12. You want what you want and you don't want to settle. Good for you! I have several friends who settled and/or married because that was what was expected of them. I enjoy my life and I don't want to screw it up with just any man. That would ruin what I have. Like everyone , I want to make my life better, not worse. So, from one 30-something to another, enjoy your absolute freedom and don't compromise it for just anyone!
Anzia
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