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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 9:55:32 AM | Lets be honest!!!
Either you had a feeling about him and just had to know what it was.
OR
You are bitter and untrusting?
As a guy, if a girl I met online was trying to find dirt on me behind my back and not coming to my face and asking in advance.
Well I find it rude and shows poor communication skills.
How would you feel if he came to you and said "I had a cop buddy of mine run your record". "what's up with all the speeding tickets"?
Don't tell him! | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 9:56:46 AM | Jen,,,i think someone else also pointed that out too ( i think hiyacinth??) that he would say he's a changed man and how he might try and change my mind. You know what? I think thats it right there. Instead of going thru all that, im just going to leave things be and just let it drop. If i read between the lines i think you've been thru a similiar experience.
Again,,,thanks to all of you who've helped.  's | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 9:57:56 AM |
msg 22, yeah... ok, right...
the police pressed charges on you because you walked in on a teenager being raped and you helped out and had to beat the guy up and were convicvted of it.
ok........ whatever.
Court system is screwed up huh. It was not the police that pressed charges on me nor was it the state, it was the man (actually his family), I served 30 days in county and he was sentenced 4yrs.
In court it came out that I did not have to go as far as I did (I agree), he was pretty bad off, I threw him through a sliding glass door completely naked. And that was just the start of it. Infact 30 days was because of my plea, if not I would have done a year in county for a 4th felony. So that I would not have a felony I had to plea to this (at least that's what was advised by my attorney). | |
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- ME -
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Joined: 5/17/2007
Msg: 29 | |
| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:01:08 AM | ^^^^^^ Ripley, how do you go about checking court records of someone if you know name and everything about them? Do you do it on line? if this is public record is it free to do background checks? and where do I find what web site to go to to get this info? and if it does cost to do this how much is it.
I have tried to do background checks before on web sites but they want money to find any of their info out.
thanks i am a bit interested in someone but dont know if i should without doing a background check. I have tried to find out but they want a credit card for money to find out on anyone. unless i am going to the wrong site or sites?
great post, cause i want to know how to do it and cant find out how?
thanks | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:02:08 AM | Hi Jayson,,
Yes,, i just had this feeling about him during our phone conversation that just kind of gave me the feeling that hmmm,,since i do have access to this site, maybe i should check this guy out. What surprised me was what i had suspected might possibly be in the records wasnt but was actually something much worse. | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:05:49 AM | Tough one...really. Good luck figuring out if you're going to tell him or not.
I'd known a guy for a year or so - we didn't meet online but through friends of friends. The meeting was totally by chance - no one had planned to "set us up" blah blah.
I liked him as soon as I met him and vice versa. He and I come from totally different backgrounds and have totally different life styles....there's really no way we would have had a future. Nonetheless, we spent some time together when we could and things were "nice". One weekend, I met a few of his friends. He and I spent quite a bit of time with one of his friends in particular. This friend of his realized the differences between us and asked my guy if he'd told me yet about the time he'd spent in jail. As he hadn't thus far - his friend encouraged him to do so.
That Sunday evening, I was so informed. Bottom line - he's a felon. That was enough for me. He didn't get very far in the telling... I didn't even find out what he'd done. I just stopped seeing him. And, even though I knew from the beginning there wasn't much of a future - I'd gotten a little attached and it was somewhat difficult to let go.
My friends knew about the entire thing -start to finish - and were all a little sad about the whole thing with/for me.
A few months AFTER I stopped seeing him one of my girlfriends found out what his conviction was for and told me. That information totally validated my decision to cut and run - or so I thought. Many months later - I ran into the friend of the friend who introduced us and we chatted a bit. One topic discussed was how "heart broken" my guy had been when I stopped seeing him...blah blah blah. I explained things to the friend and upon further discussion, was encouraged to hear my guy's side of the story.
Eventually, I learned that although he was indeed, guilty of the charge, there were many circumstances that, had I known at the time, might have impacted my decision to stop seeing him. ... MIGHT have.
All things being what they were with him - however (including his initial deception in keeping such a huge thing from me), I was done.
Lesson learned - there are always two sides and it is my responsibility to be aware of both before making a major decision.
Good luck in your decision. | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:07:55 AM | KentuckyRed,
You are in central Kentucky correct? Do a search on your web browser for Kentucky (whatever county) your courts you are in. Do a search for metropolitan or district court for you county. Once you have located the court(s) you can do a case look up. | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:11:10 AM | Hi kentucky,,,
Yes,,,i was able to access the information online and yup, it is free (at least here in my city). I was able to just type in my county like for example, stclaircounty dot org., and then from there i just choose where i needed to go. I can try to help you if you'd like. I added you to my favorites so you are able to contact me if you'd like.
I do understand how some people would be offended if they knew they were being checked on, but the way i look at it is,,,its my (our) safety and possibly life and some people really do hide the not so good parts of their lives really well. | |
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- ME -
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Joined: 5/17/2007
Msg: 34 | |
| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:14:53 AM | thanks keith but he has live in a few differnet states to will the kentucky have the info for these other states to? i dont know what counties these other states are? and do they cost anything to do this? im not so good on locating or searching the district courts there is so much to go thru to find out anything. i have tried doing that before but dont understand where to go in the county court, sorry im not that great on doing searchs  | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:17:49 AM | Not to mention how uncomfortable and creepy it could get if you told him what you knew and he went balistic with some crazy story of how he was framed and how the cops were out to get him... ugh........
save yourself all that. There are plenty of fish in the sea. | |
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- ME -
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Joined: 5/17/2007
Msg: 36 | |
| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:18:49 AM | thanks ripley i will try what you said first. yeah women never know who is a preditor or not. to me i think it is very wise to do these checks. i will probably get slammed by a bunch of me for even asking how to do this. but men dont have to worry like women do.  | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:19:26 AM | Rayene,,, hi :)
Its good to know (well not 'good' but you know what i mean! lol) that you speak from experince as far as getting some information on your guy. The thing too, is there isnt just this particular one thing that has me running which in itself is enough to make any woman run, but he also has other 'stuff' on there as well. Seemed like a cool guy, but i dont for one minute regret doing the search.
And thanks for the 'good luck',,,,,,,good luck to you as well! | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:21:44 AM | | You are very welcome kentucky and good luck!! Also you are absolutely right ~ women do need to be careful! Oh and not to just say men need to be checked out, there are also women out there who could be checked out too! lol | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:21:55 AM | | All anyone has to do is get familair with the site in the county they live in ( COUNTY, not country).... you can look up many things... free. Its public info. | |
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- ME -
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Joined: 5/17/2007
Msg: 40 | |
| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:27:04 AM | thanks jenlou i will try it again and just keep seaching. im probably not looking at the right areas LOL ... anyway great post Ripley i have been looking for something like this for awhile now. Thanks so much for this info. kentucky red  | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:54:36 AM | Hi, ripley ...
After reading the other posts, I can understand why these women felt that it would not be in your best interests to tell him about accessing his arrest record. However, he doesn't have your contact information other than your screen name on here, so he couldn't come after you once you told him.
As far as my friend's ex-con ever coming back to harass her ... no, he didn't come after her. However, she told me she was on a city bus one evening rush hour and she saw him get on. The seat next to her was vacant and he sat down! This was 6 years after she threw him out of her apartment. He started heckling her for calling the police on him and had the audacity to ask her to get off the bus and go have a drink with him. Unbelievable. She told him to get lost or she'd tell the bus driver he was harassing her. He got off at the next stop. | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 11:04:39 AM | | I think you were incredibly smart to check the background check first--good for you! There are way too many guys out there who don't have records to mess with, without wasting time with someone who doesn't deserve it. I know as soon as my husband kicked his son--he immediately disqualified himself as being a father, since there were 300 million men out there that DIDN'T kick my son. I think with a little fishing, you could do a lot better. | |
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lana86
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Joined: 5/30/2007
Msg: 43 | |
| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 11:05:16 AM | heygirl, to be honest with you, i did a background check on my boyfriend and i didnt tell him what i found, but it wasnt anything bad..but always google someone. my close friends think im physco to google someone and find out all the info i can about them.
DONT tell him that you found out anything, just keep talking to him but slowly back off of him if you personally email me, that would be great because i can go more in to detail on stuff
i am only 20 and have experienced a crap load of stuff like this but you never know, he could be doing the same thing on you, like checking out every posting you do, like this one, not meaning to scare you or anything
hope he doesnt know your last name
email me personally and we will chat on this subject | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 11:10:09 AM | I think honestly is always the best policy. There is no reason to lie to the guy, I'm sure he has a sneaking suspicion that it would be the reason anyway so why lie about it. Now of course I'm not looking at the same information you are, but something to keep in mind when looking at a background check, stupid mistakes can happen, how long ago did this occur? Im not justifying anything he has done at all. But if you were really interested in him finding out how and why these things occured may change your feelings about them. But if they are very serious and you just want him gone, be truthful and say goodbye.
p.s the reason i say think about the charges first, what if it's some stupid possession charge because of something stupid like pot ?? would really want to toss him due to something so redicilious.  | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 11:34:01 AM | Kentucky: there is also peoplesearch dot com and Zabasearch. What these will tell you are previous addresses, spouse and relatives in the system. Such as someone co-signing on a loan, etc. The interesting thing is that you can view "possible roommates" also ~ which would indicate that someone was not married, but may be living with someone. These are free sites for the initial info. The most useful information is locations ~ you can then (if in the US) go to the County public records for information re: criminal history. It is legal here in the US ~ any court proceedings (other than sealed files) can be read and or copied (for a fee.) Most often the Court Clerk will just tell you over the telephone what the record consists of. If you feel a person has been in prison (rather than jail) all you have to do is pull up that State's Department of Corrections website, do an offender search, put in the name and you will see several things:
Criminal convictions resulting in State prison time, length of stay, and current status such as: Released to official prison personnel (probation/parole) or Release (and usually a date.)
Google is highly misguiding.
~OP~ I wouldn't tell someone what I know re: criminal history. I would just politely say, "thanks, but no thanks." and disappear.
I would however, let someone know if I found a live-in gf or wife. I had someone's live-in phone me in the recent past ~ it wasn't pleasant holding her hand for an hour on the telephone why she cried and told me "their" story. Rather tragic actually. AND I was number 3 that day for her. Although he had been set up here by a friend of mine, so I had already told him to go "f" himself ~ it was still rather dramatic hearing her cry and knowing that the mere existence of my telephone number caused another woman such heartache ~ now, I'm not sure where I stand on the whole background check thing, but working in the legal system for so long has taught me a very valuable lesson: those with nothing to hide don't mind you looking, those who are being sneaky HATE these options. Not in every case ~ but most often. Better luck next time!!  | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 12:11:15 PM |
Wasnt quite sure where to post this topic but i am asking for advice so i guess maybe here is the place. Ok,,,exchanged a few emails via POF only and have talked on the phone. Then i remembered that a freind of mine gave me the site to our local court records and i thought hmmm,,, and lo and behold,,,this person had a few hits. It is serious enough that i do not want to further get to know this person. My question is: Should i be honest with this person and tell them what i found, or just tell him that im not interested? The option to just ignore his email is not acceptable to me. I want to reply to his latest email maturely (ive yet to open it since i just got it yesterday and want to wait for some advice first) but im not sure what to say. Anyone with any good advice??
Thanks!!!
You know if hes a smart man you all ready let the cat out of the by posting it in pof LOL. I would my respective lady although I don't think 3 speeding tickets would count as criminal acts though mostly infractions.
that's just my 2 cents. | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 12:54:52 PM | OP: As a LEO, when we do a background on someone, we always have to double check that they are who we think they are. We do that by getting as much information on the subject as we can. Date of birth, SSN, descriptors (height/weight/identifying marks, etc.), and so on. The reasons for this are obvious. I certainly don't want to arrest someone on a warrant only to find out that they aren't the right one. So I always take as many steps as I can to confirm their identity.
My advice? Tell him what you found. These days it's not uncommon for females to want to run a criminal history check on potential suitors. Tell him whatever you found is something you feel is unacceptable, and that you don't appreciate his lack of honesty on his past.
Msg 22: You're full of crap. No District Attorney on the planet would prosecute someone who was "defending a 15 year old girl who was getting raped". No cop would make an arrest based on those circumstances. Make up a more believable story. | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 2:50:54 PM | I agree that you could make up a better story... LOL, LOL, LOL !!! that one is just lame !
Zaba and all those sites do not have the info that COUNTY records do..... you can check many things on the county records including any lawsuits they were in, divorces, marriages, evictions, assumed names, IRS leins, judgements and sooooooooooo much more. You will have to look into your countys public records and browse the site and learn how to get around it... you can find more than you want to know in there......
and I would also check any other county records if someone is not originally from the area your in.
Zaba can be helpful, but nothing like county public records. Its called "profiling" and a good idea when meeting people off the web. | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 2:51:50 PM | | You know FKcop, I really don't care if you believe my case. Your opinion means nothing! Seriously. People go to prison everyday who are found guilty for a crime they never commented. If you want to trust in your judicial system fine, it was the judicial system that put me where I was. I had my day in court. AS the DA pointed out I went overboard in my actions, and I'm man enough to admit that. Don't tell me the DA would not prosecute on such a case, you must be one dumb cop. Your in a different state under different regulations, don't come here and pretend to thank you know about my case and my situation.. | |
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| 'Something' in a background check,,,,
Posted: 6/7/2007 3:00:58 PM | When public records are not online, you can go to a local clerk of courts office and check things out. It is usually a lot easier to check on civil and domestic relations things.
I was asked once to check out a local doctor, and he'd been sued multiple times for the same thing. You do need to use some judgment, as people have said; make sure that the information applies to the person you believe it to, and know that accusations do not necessarily establish guilt. | |
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