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 Spicy and Sassy
Joined: 10/23/2007
Msg: 101
Can sex keep you in a relationship?Page 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Here is what I think: If the relationship is rocky, ie: you cant stand each other the sex is probably not even happening, let alone keeping anyone in the relationship. If the relationship is ok, but seeming to be going nowhere and the sex is outstanding, then it could keep two people in a relationship.

But here is my question: If the sex is outstanding for both parties involved- how is it that the relationship is lagging? What is it that creates that extreme passion?? I've always been under the assumption that sex without some kind of emotion to it can only last so long. Hmmmmm.... wondering.... so many questions.... so few answers.
 amazon60
Joined: 10/13/2007
Msg: 102
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/28/2007 4:17:42 AM
I think good sex can keep bad relationships going for a long time. For many reasons, because it is good, because it is available, the fear of not having it if you leave....etc....more people do it then we realize....I have continued a relationship for the sex.....wasnt my best decision, but at the time it seemed like a great decision.
lol
 MeloFelo
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 103
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/28/2007 4:31:35 AM

But here is my question: If the sex is outstanding for both parties involved- how is it that the relationship is lagging? What is it that creates that extreme passion?? I've always been under the assumption that sex without some kind of emotion to it can only last so long. Hmmmmm.... wondering.... so many questions.... so few answers


The opposite of love isn't "hate", it's indifference. I have had a relationship where the emotions were always intense, but often felt like mutal anger, bordering on hate, but when we were together, we'd have "violent" sex when we proclaimed that we "hated" each other. It was intense, and while the relationship was somewhat "unhealthy" for each of us, it was also addictive. We couldn't stand to not have that intensity.

It's not something I would choose to repeat, but I learned a lot from that relationship. Boring relationships lead to boring sex, though. It's hard to imagine a long running relationship, where the sex is "great", but otherwise the feelings are indifferent. Sex is not just about sexual acts. It involves connection and feelings and the more intense the connection, the better the sex, at least in my experience.
 Brian22601
Joined: 11/28/2007
Msg: 104
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/28/2007 5:17:45 AM
I feel that "sex" is just one element of a healthy relationship. Good sex might prolong the break up if one or both involved are looking for a more meaningful experience in life with their partner.

The opposite holds true "no sex can break up a relationship". Basically, I feel that if two people don't fulfill each others desires, one or both will seek those missing elements elsewhere.

There are exceptions: virginity, waiting for marriage, medical issues -- so my comment only reflects relationships where as sex has already been accepted and desired by both persons initially.

Communications is key.
 Schadenfreudian
Joined: 7/5/2007
Msg: 105
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/28/2007 5:19:07 AM
<===== [hummin' "Prisoner of Love" ]
 Awrita
Joined: 12/2/2007
Msg: 106
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/28/2007 5:35:24 AM
suppose it depends on what you are looking for -if its just sex you are after n its great then hey your sorted, although if you want more and thats not there well then theres problems. I wouldnt stay with someone if the full package wasnt there just for good sex as I dont think its hard to find compatablitiy in the bedroom - if 2 people take the time and effort to learn each others bodies then its easy
 ex-navy
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 107
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/30/2007 3:12:44 AM
Hmmm. That's a rough question. I would say try to work on the bad while using the good to keep things together for as long as possible. Buy time to work on the bad stuff. If the bad is too much, like cheating or physical violence, then no question get the hell outta there. But if it's over ideosyncracies like smell, apperance, timeliness or something that can be dealt with in time, then work on it. If it's something big that starts well into the relationship, then seek counciling. If the not so big probs don't wanna fix with counciling and all the time that can be baught has been, then what's gotta be done has gotta be done.
 Ignoble
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 108
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History
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 12/30/2007 3:24:43 AM
Yer damned straight sex can keep me in a relationship. I mean... why would I turn down regular sex? That doesnt compute...
 yourtimeisnow
Joined: 8/24/2007
Msg: 109
Relationships
Posted: 12/30/2007 3:25:15 AM
Yes I believe it can . . . .
 echo*
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 110
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 1/11/2008 5:47:34 PM
I have recently rethought my position on this one. It can postpone my departure, but if nothing else is good about the relationship, I eventually stop going back for more. I just proved this to myself to be true.
 halofork
Joined: 8/3/2007
Msg: 111
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 1/11/2008 6:07:01 PM
In general terms, if it's a FWB situation, yes; but if it's a serious romantic relationship, no.

Problems in a serious relationships usually causes decrease in sex while increasing episodes.

 IkeTurnerStoleMyCellPhone
Joined: 7/25/2006
Msg: 112
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 4/29/2008 6:07:57 AM
From my experiences, sex is, well, just sex. The only creatures on this planet that have sex for pleasure are humans and dolphins. Dolphins do it and make odd noises while people do it and, well, I think you get the point. Sex is great and all that, but sometimes while just hanging out, like spending time together, emotions do their thing and kind of let you know if you have a connection with that person. No matter how many women spread their legs and say "C'mon on in!" there's not one drink(excluding tequila), one pill(excluding ecstasy), or one strap-on(no comment) out there that can give you the satisfaction that just hanging and laughing just to laugh can provide. As much as I love the sex I'd much rather just enjoy the person for who they are. Even though that last line sounds like something you'd hear on "Full House," after you're done humping wouldn't you like to feel like you're not having a one night stand?
 mochawoman
Joined: 5/18/2007
Msg: 113
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 4/30/2008 12:34:57 PM
Yeah, unfortunately, I've let that happen to me a couple of times. But after awhile when you realize you have virtually nothing going on outside of the bedroom the relationship usually fizzles out, at least for me.
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 114
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 4/30/2008 12:54:45 PM
duh NO ...but lack of sex could send me running
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 115
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History
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 5/1/2008 11:16:55 AM
Sex is very important in a relationship,but you have to have a relationship to keep together lol, does that make sense ?
 DRbarbiedoll369
Joined: 12/7/2007
Msg: 116
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 5/1/2008 1:07:04 PM
i think it is possible that sex will keep you in a relationship. the most important thing in a relationship is sex becuz if u love someone but arent really attracted to them and dont wanna have sex with them then sooner or later you will become uninterested and want to break up and if you give your man good wild up against the wall sex he will never leave. thats the way to a mans heart
 HazelGreen77
Joined: 4/16/2008
Msg: 117
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 5/1/2008 1:16:02 PM
Just be FWB and call it a day! that way nobody gets hurt..
 bigshrek
Joined: 11/15/2007
Msg: 118
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 8/15/2008 6:47:04 PM
^^^ +1

Even lousy sex can keep a relationship going...I wasted 3 years on that recently. Kicking myself the whole time. I finally broke free and found a gal that I really connected with on EVERY level...

I remember a gal who had the nickname of Spooky...looked like a DDD version of a grown up Mrs. Addams (Original Version)...mmmmm...the ONLY reason I spent two years with her was the sex...there is much to be said for the kinda gal that could suck the chrome off a Harley...and it's all GOOD!! Unfortunately it was just a physical thang...and I was under 25 yrs...and we all know how guys think when they are under 25...
 Droleci
Joined: 4/21/2004
Msg: 119
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:11:20 PM
Yes.

I've stayed in an up and down rollercoaster ride of a relationship (although she refused to call it one) because we were somewhat regularly intimate.

Occassional sex is better than the no sex at all of being single.
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 120
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 8/15/2008 10:35:01 PM
I stayed way too long in a crazy relationship, partly out of fear of being alone but a lot because the sex was so good. Most often, a bad relationship causes a deterioration in sex but this was one case where that was the one thing that really worked. Thank God I finally saw my way out of it, though. It wasn't worth it. My life is so much calmer since then and I've managed to find some very good partners without all the insanity.
 IWishItWasSummer
Joined: 11/11/2007
Msg: 121
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 8/16/2008 12:13:35 AM

Not only can it keep you in the relationship but it can lure you to believe that the relationship is strong.


Absolutely.
 needloveagain
Joined: 8/23/2008
Msg: 122
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 10/30/2008 8:05:53 PM
no both have to feel the sexual desire for each other. but if you are sexually compatible maybe if you have mind blowing sex then you will miss it when its gone regardless what happens.
 brown_eyed_woman
Joined: 8/31/2008
Msg: 123
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 10/31/2008 3:19:04 AM
No

Once I lose respect, I lose everything else along with it, including desire...no matter how great the sexual memories.
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