| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/11/2007 4:10:40 PM |
Since I am not like the awful spoiled "girls" you little boys here are describing in your definitions, then Yes, that does make me better. If you're dumb enough to go for a girl just because she "looks good", you deserve the hell she brings into your life.
I've met some really high maintenance women who aren't really all that good looking at all. High maintenance, as many have pointed out, is about attitude. The high maintenance woman, and likely the same with men, are all about themselves and have no regard whatsoever for other people. They demand the universe relvolve around them and are driven to make sure everyone knows it.
What you mention as "taking care of yourself" just sounds like a relatively well-grounded and balanced adult.
And, for the record, OP, you sound like a high maintenance person despite your ability to take care of yourself. | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/11/2007 8:28:02 PM | You know at the begining I thought the OP was ranting because some guy was an a$$ to her and I was ok with it because there was some intelligence between rants
BUT DAMN SHE MELTED DOWN
She was offered many well thought out posts that she ignored the content completely and attacked the author even when they were almost agreeing with her. And the lady that disected her original post she says "FINALLY UNDERSTANDS Her"
And now we are all Ignorant with IQ"S under 20 and some of our mothers and grandmothers are whores because they chose to raise their children instead of work
SHE IS DEFINATELY HIGH MAINTENENCE | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/11/2007 8:36:29 PM |
You know at the begining I thought the OP was ranting because some guy was an a$$ to her and I was ok with it because there was some intelligence between rants
BUT DAMN SHE MELTED DOWN
She was offered many well thought out posts that she ignored the content completely and attacked the author even when they were almost agreeing with her. And the lady that disected her original post she says "FINALLY UNDERSTANDS Her"
And now we are all Ignorant with IQ"S under 20 and some of our mothers and grandmothers are whores because they chose to raise their children instead of work
SHE IS DEFINATELY HIGH MAINTENENCE
Yeah, I was even trying to be nice to begin with. Guess she just doesn't like males? Are there even any 59 or so year old lesbians for her to find comfort with? | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/11/2007 10:06:25 PM | OP is starting to come off as a misandronist.
I'm wondering if her being a therapist and psychologist has over the years lead her to start categorizing people and skewed her view of men based on the type of clients she encounters at work.
People here obviously have a different opinion than she does. Doesn't that suggest the possibility that she is not interacting with the same spectrum of men the rest of us are in our everyday lives? | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/12/2007 7:51:44 AM | I'll spell it out for you.
"Takes care of herself" = fit, thin, attractive, not fat
It's a nice way to say the above without sounding supeficial. Problem is many women think be because they go to the gym, get their nails done, hair etc. that constitutes taking care of one's self. Their definition vs. the men being contacted are often way off.
"High Matinenance"= Lots of drama, expects $$, always has to be center of attention. | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/15/2007 10:36:32 AM | ^^^Center of attention: definitely the characteristic of a high maintenance woman.
If you are a woman who thinks she "needs" elective voluntary plastic surgery, you definitely are "high maintenance".
To me a "high maintenance" woman is more attitude than appearance. A woman who has a sense of "entitlement" just because she is a woman is definitely high maintenance. A woman with 200 pairs of shoes in a room solely devoted to storing those shoes is high maintenance. A woman who feels she "needs" new clothing all the time and continues to ring up credit card debt is high maintenance. If a woman wants a particular physical look, has the money to pay for it, and doesn't have a sense of "entitlement", in my eyes she is NOT high maintenance. High maintenance implies she can't pay her bills and expects a main to prop up her lifestyle.
Basically I define a woman "who takes care of herself" as one who exercises regularly, eats healthy, and hasn't rung up thousands of dollars of credit card debt.
I don't think about "high maintenance" men too often; I suppose a HM guy is a who can't pay his bills, and falls into the following groups; a metrosexual, a guy who needs to have all the latest electronic gadgets and do-dads, needs to play golf or some other expensive sport, and feels like he needs luxury items he really doesn't "need", like boats, motorcycles, cars, etc. | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/15/2007 4:01:46 PM | Whew, these are some extracts from OP's posts on this thread before I stopped half way. Guys, can you see yourselves ever breathing out while she is around?
If she has the time and money for all this, she's probably being kept by a sugar daddy or husband
Take a good look - maybe you need some maintenance yourself
Don't you guys waste a lot of money on junk you don't need...
He ended up blowing his salary...
Im my experience it's usually the men who are still babies
They do stupid things without thinking or concern for the other person, don't use the common sense God gave them.
...If a guy is a bum and uses coupons 2 for 1 to take you to burger king...
Well, some guys who make a lot of $ are more stingy than the guy who's a maintenance man
...not having to worry about what stupid, dangerous or wasteful thing he'll do next, and either maim or kill himself ,or cause us to go bankrupt.
...having a spiritual life, reading the Bible, praying and all that stuff he thinks is "dumb" because he's a heathen and will burn in hell .
Afraid she might look so good she could get someone better than you
Since I am not like the awful spoiled "girls" you little boys here are describing in your definitions
And think those skanks you date, who waste so much money on themeslves, are better than ME??? NOT !
It says in the Bible "by their fruits shall ye know them." There is an attitude here.
I'm not trying to be unkind OP but perhaps there is an issue you have that would make it hard for a man to be around you... which is another way of referring to the emotional side of High Maintenance.
They don't know that she worked hard for everything she has, that her parents gave her nothing...
...and definitely have not been spoiled ever in my life
...the education I worked hard to get and how I've worked all those years and did everything for myself.
Perhaps being a loved and "spoiled" little girl would have been a good thing. | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/16/2007 12:21:53 AM |
Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Taking care of yourself and high maintenance are two completely different things. In fact, they're pretty much opposites.
So just what does it mean -"Takes care of herself"?
It means...that you take care of yourself. No mystery there.
If she has the time and money for all this, she's probably being kept by a sugar daddy or husband
Contrary to your beliefs, some women actually can afford to pamper themselves with their own abilities and/or their own income...and power to them. These are women that take care of themselves.
But since you seem to think that a sugar daddy or husband is required, this shows that you are high-maintenance since you expect such pampering yet lack the initiative or the ability to do these things on your own.
And the older we get, the more 'maintenance' we need
Apparently, the older YOU get, the more maintenance YOU need.
what do you think about the conflicting statements of men wanting us to "Take Care of Ourselves", yet Not be "High Maintenance"? Can it be done? Please Tell Us How????
The 'how' is simple - just take care of yourself. If you can do that, then you're not high maintenance. | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/16/2007 2:38:06 AM | Was just talking about this to a male friend and we agree: with some men eg us:
(ducks head)
Take care of yourself = keep slim and fit. Nothing whatsoever to do with grooming, dress standards etc
High maintenance = expensive lifestyle that you have to be part of and/or high degree of attention must be paid to her most of the time.
The last is relative of course. Expensive compared to your comfortable means. | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 6/16/2007 5:45:18 AM | | DebinSameState, "High Maintenance" to me goes beyond a woman's ability to make herself presentable. It's an insecurity for whether or not she's pretty or proper enough and constantly seeking approval for what's on the surface. My ex, for example, always dressed up to impress others before accept that there are some days and times when it's an overkill for the situation. | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 8/24/2007 12:50:29 PM | Thank you for this thread! I am so confused by all of this. I have had men write me on the very first email and tell me I'm high maintenance! How can someone determine by my pics and profile that I'm high maintenace? Yes, I french tip my nails (MY nails, real) both on my hands and feet. I like to work out so, I do stay fit (gym at home). I have paid for my own meals on many a first meeting, do not expect men to buy me gifts, money, etc. I own my own home that I paid for, maintain my home, land, etc. have NEVER asked for assistance. Heck, I never asked for nor received one penny from my Ex for child-support (when they were little) or spousal support. I do not stalk, don't even like being on the phone with prospective dates, don't ask to be taken anywhere (though will suggest a place to meet, have coffee), do not ask nor want to be with a partner 24/7, as I have a life outside of dating yet, I receive email telling me I'm high maintenance..... what in the world is that all about?
So far, I have been called a JAP (I'm Jewish), a "Princess", told I'm "out of their league", "Prissy" (guess someone else cleans out my burning barrel) and let's not forget the "high maintenance"!
I know other women go through this same thing and it's really annoying! In all honesty, I'm about ready to give up on this dating thing.... just doesn't seem worth all the hassel. If we try not to prejudge men, why are we prejudged? | |
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| Why do men want a woman who Takes Care of Herself, yet Don't want one who's High Maintenance?
Posted: 8/24/2007 1:06:55 PM | | How would you feel if someone prejudged you as I've been? I've worked hard for all I have, nothing was handed to me yet, I had one man tell me that I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth and went to private schools (in addition to the other remarks I've received from other men). The "private" school I went to was through the Philadelphia school system, with hundreds of thousands of other kids, aka public school! I served in the Army (enlisted), went to school to earn a degree (GI bill), and have worked as a truck driver, waitress, PBX operator, house keeper (paid for my clothes in High School), Food Inspector, etc..... When you've worked hard in life, and have people assume that you sit on your butt and eat bonbons, it's hurtful. So, I guess you are right, I am pissed... and rightfully so, but only at those fools who prejudge me. | |
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SVRJB
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Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 74 | |
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