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| | Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?Page 13 of 14 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14) | 5/In situations where very low levels of violence are documented or there are results that are otherwise not expected, the findings should be discussed with key informants.
What it means is that before publishing their findings, they look at other similar studies to compare.
Nevertheless, its guaranteed to bias the findings because just as there might be a variety of issues that brought on remarkably low results there may be remarkably high ones as well. The fact that low results are specifically mentioned suggests they are more likely to be questioned and examined further. Clearly its a study biased to find higher rates. How much higher one can only guess but if its 25% instead of 31% does it matter that much in terms of policy and motivating action? (by the same token it seems remarkably irresponsible of the researchers to generate an intentionally biased policy that would allow the most egregious countries to ignore the results).
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 2:58:06 PM | | I think most women don't get abused but they fear it or have heard of it. Some do get abused especially in the lower echelons of scoiety or sometimes there are still those types of men out there. The prob is when women think they are the victims sometimes they can become the abuser and justifiy verbal abuse that way. Not enuff societal concern for abuse ofmen , both physical but especially verbal. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 3:57:22 PM | | Any and all abuse should never be covered up or hidden or pretend like it didn't happen. That is the way abusers train the abused to live in fear that if they tell someone it will get worse. Keeping abuse a secret does not help someone heal. Even after they heal, talking about it is more for others who don't understand it or for those that are going through abuse and want to know others are going through it too and maybe they can get help. I healed a long time ago but that doesn't seeing others abused or being abused myself is okay now. That I should not talk about it all. That is just plain foolishness. How are people going to be educated about abuse if they don't hear about it? I happen to be happy and well ajusted. I am not invinsable, but I am so much better than I use to be. Just like John Welsh has pretty much healed from what happened from losing his son to a sick person. He is not going to ever be totally over it but he does everything in his power to make people aware of the crimes being commited and catching those who did the crimes. He does not go and hide and keep his feelings a secret. Part of healing is talking about it. Doing something positive about it. So my point is people who talk about abuse are not looking for sympathy or whining or making it up. How sad it is that people in this day and age have such backward narrowminded thinking. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 7:58:40 PM | I had been abused physically, and emotionally as a child. for many years, I had very
poor self esteem, and was scared to death of drunk people, angry people, and
emotionally manipulative people, such as bullies.
Well I did go to thearpy, and healed, then met my then Wife, who was very sneaky,
in that she was very manipulative, and controlling.
I was married a total of 19 years, and during that time, I attempted to blow my brains
out with a gun, on another occasion, unknown to what I was doing, I attempted to
starve myself to death, in which I suffered a form of cardiac arrest, due to chemical
imbalance in the body.
I guess my point is, that in most cases, there is no clear victim, but in my case, my
own fear of becoming an abuser, turns me into an abuser of myself.
I guess that I would rather not exist, than to hurt another person.
I had read on another thread here on POF, of another mans observations, that abuse
victims often go through stages, with the last stage being titled The Crusader.
I guess that I tend to agree with that observation, in that I no longer turn my anger
inward toward myself, Now I allow myself to become angry, toward my tormentor,
But rather than react to the torment with mirrored abuse, I now take it upon myself
to expose the abuse, and the abuser.
In doing this, I am able to then heal from the abuse, and eventually arrive at a stage
of forgiveness of myself, for having been a victim, After all, when I was a child, there
was nothing that I could do to escape the danger, But as an adult, I am able to say NO!
and hope that the abuser heeds my warning, Should they ignore my warning, I then have the option of walking away, or standing my ground, exposing the behavior,
and the abuser. I like to think of it as putting the spot light on where it belongs,
The person who has the anger to abuse.
This is what happened in my past marriage, in that my ex, attempted to portray me
as the abuser, when in fact, she was the emotional, and mental abuser of me, and my
two children, There was no way that I could leave my children with her, so my only
option as I seen it, was to continue to take the abuse, as I figured that I had no possible
way of getting custody. but over the years, the abuse got worse, and so finally I filed for divorce, She turned the divorce into a circus, as she played up the abuse victim
part, all the while, she continued to emotionally abuse me, pushing my buttons,
attempting to get me to react in an abusive manner.
Well I did not react as she had hoped, and after a custody evaluation, and two years,
I was able to gain custody of the children, And as well, the Court, terminated her
parental rights!
Of course she blames the system, and continues to play victim, even though she was the one who cheated, lied, manipulated, and was generally just a sorry assed individual, somehow she deludes herself into the belief that because she is a woman,
she is the victim. pretty sad stuff, But when a woman claims abuse, I view it with
some doubt.
As a victim of abuse, I am all to aware of how women tend to abuse emotionally,
such as my grandmother did to my father, who in turn abused me physically,
and emotionally, And then of course my mother, who abused me emotionally as well.
So I am a survivor, and proud to say, the buck stops here! but sadly I had married
the wrong person, who in turn abused me and my children, which in turn caused my
Son to become a manipuator much like his mother. But he has become aware, and
grown and healed, and my daugther, well she is the one who got protected and
raised in a more healthy manner.
Thanks for the attention and understanding. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 8:11:28 PM | Norseman51
But when a woman claims abuse, I view it with
some doubt.
As a victim of abuse, I am all to aware of how women tend to abuse emotionally,
Are you saying ALL women who claim abuse are lieing? I am very sorry for what you have endured ,and can empathize with you, but as one abused victom to another, don't say it only happens to one gender and not the other. Abuse is ramped in all walks of life. Like Children, elderly, spouses, employees, suffer too and many more. Anger mamagement should be taught in school as well as learning how to deal with stress, feelings, emotions etc. There is no one fix it all for abuse. But if we don't do anything to stop it, shame on us. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 8:20:31 PM | I think most women don't get abused but they fear it or have heard of it. Some do get abused especially in the lower echelons of scoiety or sometimes there are still those types of men out there.
just out of curiosity, where do you get your information from, and what do you base your opinions on? do you have any factual basis for your opinions?
try this for some hard core in your face facts
www.endabuse.org | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 8:30:13 PM | Nevertheless, its guaranteed to bias the findings because just as there might be a variety of issues that brought on remarkably low results there may be remarkably high ones as well.
where did you get "remarkable" from? it said this;
"results that are otherwise not expected"
it didnt indicate to what degree of difference, just indicated "otherwise not expected"
when a scientist seeks to proove something or disproove it they first start with a hypothosis,, same thing with a study like this. first they write the hypothosis. they also write what they figure the outcome of the study will be based on the parameters used in the research process. what that statement you clipped is saying is that if they dont get what they expect to, further investigation will be done to determine why the numbers/ findings were different.
the only way there could be a "guaranteed" bias to the findings is if they went to specific places that battered women are and interview those women specifically, instead of interviewing a cross section of women they find in a benign environment. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 8:39:57 PM | | I've got way to much to do, why don't you say what you want in a sentence without making me get on a website. As usual, you are going to misinterpret what I said and then argue some self -evident point. I am sure there are women who are abused, there are also men who are abused, men abuse gets ignored, most people laugh at the very topic, women like yourself make it known when they are abused. Men can't talk about it for fear of looking weak. But no, I don't think most women that I see are getting abused, most men know they are getting thrown in prioson as soon as a woman calls the cops with an accusation, yet men cannot call the cops when women verbally abuse. Women tend to speak at twice the number of words that men do. So your going to get me to talk about women abuse and I'm not taking the bait, I'm here to talk about men abuse and to say that men abuse is just as bad if not worse. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 8:53:26 PM | | Let me tell you something thats true. You obviously don't have time to look at or hear the facts so just so you know My ex who tried to kill me many times did not spend one day in jail. Not sure where your getting your information from. I think your making it as you go along. I hardly see any abusers go to jail. Unless they kill someone. Here goes the black and white thinking again. sheeesh. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 9:24:44 PM |
I think most women don't get abused but they fear it or have heard of it. Some do get abused especially in the lower echelons of scoiety or sometimes there are still those types of men out there. The prob is when women think they are the victims sometimes they can become the abuser and justifiy verbal abuse that way. Not enuff societal concern for abuse ofmen , both physical but especially verbal.
Let me just clarify this..okay? You think it's a case of mass hysteria by predominantly the lower class? (you mean ghetto n*ggers don't you..geez darlin' don't hold back what you really think, oh, they call it the projects now, or "da hood!" Let's not forget the white trailer trash either, wouldn't want to discriminate, they don't call them there muscle shirts "wife-beaters" for nothin') And when we (meaning women) fall prey to this hysteria out of our (imaginary?) fear of male abuse, OR even the RUMOURS of abuse we use it as an excuse to abuse men? Is that what you said? Wow, I never knew just how f*cked-up I really was, being a woman and all.
This is a snippet of a training course for medical professionals. Most of the info is taken from the Department of Justice Statitics Division.
* Domestic Violence is a pattern of assaultive and coercive behaviors, including physical, sexual, and psychological attacks, as well as economic coercion, that adults or adolescents use against their intimate partner
* Victims of Domestic Violence can be found in every age, racial, cultural, socioeconomic, religious, and sexual orientation group.
* In the context of this training, we will focus on male-to-female abuse. The U.S. Departments of Justice estimates that 85% of assaults are committed by men against women. Although the majority of domestic violence victims are women, do not forget that men account for 15% of the victims.
Domestic Violence in America
* 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence during her lifetime. (22% - 29%)
* A national survey of 6,000 American families revealed that 50% of the men who frequently assaulted their wives also frequently abused their children.
* Studies show that 90% of the children in violent homes are aware of the violence and 70% of the children in battered women’s shelters have been physically abused.
* One third of female homicide victims are murdered by their intimate male partners.
* Pregnant and recently pregnant women are more likely to be victims of homicide than to die of any other cause.
Surely a man of your obvious education and gentile breeding knows what he is talking about. Ignorance is for the dirty masses, not for the lettered. Surely, no one of high social status ever experiences anything so banal and common as domestic violence... couldn't happen, might mess up the nice Turkish rug in the foyer. The upper class are beyond such brutish displays! It's simply unheard of!
well, my friend I hate to burst your costly little fraternity bubble there, but, you are so wrong I can't even describe how wrong you are. The only difference for the rich b!tches is how to keep others from knowing, because of the shame I just described above.. if getting your lips knocked through your teeth, and being threatened with severe bodily harm, or even death, on a weekly or daily basis is hard for that little black girl from the projects..how hard is it going to be on someone who HAS to keep up appearances. Can she just say she went to Switzerland for a facelift? Or had a botox injection earlier and it left a bruise? What chance does she have in keeping the children, especially if the money is his? Would she lose all her friends if she went to the police? Her acceptance at the Country Club? Many many wealthier women go through this ..oh, ya...you think it's mass hysteria, and women are just all f*in' delusional and looking for an excuse to abuse men. Geez, I'd sure like to get you to talk to the Crown Prosecutor that handled my case. On that note I don't condone violence against men either...but at 85% of the cases..I think women have alittle more at stake. Hopefully the research and social changes made for women victims will also help the male ones.
Well, it just goes to show you that money can't buy brains. You, sir, are a dumbass... | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/11/2007 10:25:47 PM | Ladies, Ladies, Ladies...... The report you keep making reference to, from The Bureau of Justice Statistics, by thier own admission..."The data is based on information gathered from victims, law enforcement agencies, hospital emergency departments, and those convicted of crimes against intimates. " ....... I'm not an American..... but are these the only places you'll find a cross section of your society? ........ I'll say it again.... "isn't this like doing a survey at a ball park and then being shocked at the high percentage of baseball fans"...LOL
American murder rates are 10 times what Canada's are.... would it not follow that all forms of violence are at higher rates??
Domestic violence happens in all social classes, there are studies that show higher rates in lower class urban centers, but, all crime rates are higher in these nieghbourhoods, so I think it is to be expected.... | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 2:03:59 AM | Some do get abused especially in the lower echelons of scoiety
^
@ thats true ....
It might be politically incorrect to make a statement like that , but unfortunately, being politically incorrect often means you're being accurate.....
http://www.debunker.com/texts/BatteredWomanWalker.html
For example, Richard J. Gelles, drawing from the NIMH study of which he is co-author, writes that "families living in large urban areas, minority racial groups, individuals with no religious affiliation, people with some high school education, families with low incomes, blue- collar workers, people under 30, and families where the husband was unemployed had the highest rate of marital violence" [Gelles, 1979, p. 141]. Gelles and his co-authors offer statistics to back up this statement, while Prof. Walker, disputing them, offers none; we are simply instructed to believe her. Nonetheless, Walker's Proof by Fiat clearly meets all required standards of feminist scholarship, because the "mythical" nature of these statements has become an unquestioned fact within the Canon of subsequent feminist literature.
One might rightly harbor the suspicion that these "myths" are proclaimed as "myths" out of ideological necessity rather than solid evidence. Feminist ideology has, after all, strong links to egalitarian socialism, and often proclaims itself quite explicitly to be anti-hierarchal. In fact, Walker even states that feminist principles "mandate that no one person take a leadership role but that leadership be shared among numerous women" (p.197). Therefore any perception that domestic violence is more prevalent among those of low education and socioeconomic status runs counter to what the "correct" conclusion is supposed to be; affluent and respected white males are regarded as the principal source of evil in society. In fact, several of the incidents Walker describes portray high-income, high-status husbands and fathers in a Jekyll-and-Hyde pose: highly respected by society, at home they are secretly abusive and vindictive. A "corporate executive's wife" claimed "my husband was more powerful than the court"; according to another her brutal husband "was on the medical school faculty" (p. 175); a third claims that her politician husband "pushes himself day and night to get his [social] programs through... but shut off the TV cameras and he's mean and nasty" (p.165).
While such individuals may well exist, statistics indicate that domestic violence is at its absolute lowest in this high-income, high-status group. During the 1980s, such Jekyll-and-Hyde depictions of successful white males who led hidden lives as secret abusers would be invoked frequently by "recovered memory therapists" to justify belief in their otherwise-unbelievable "recovered memories of abuse" by seemingly respectable and loving fathers [for example, Bass and Davis, 1988].
These supposedly "recovered memories" are actually confabulations ("false memories") suggested by therapists and | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 2:21:27 AM |
but at 85% of the cases..I think women have alittle more at stake. Hopefully the research and social changes made for women victims will also help the male ones.
Actually , domestic abuse is a two way street...
http://www.batteredmen.com/batsacks2way.htm
Battered Men - The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence
Gender Polarization of a People Issue
Domestic Violence:
A Two-Way Street
© 2001 by Glenn Sacks
October is the seventh annual Domestic Violence Awareness Month, when activists and the media focus the nation's attention on violence against women. However, October's events only tell half the story. Why? Because the research on domestic violence overwhelmingly establishes that domestic assault is not a crime committed by men against women, but instead one committed by both men and women. By using weapons and the element of surprise, women are abusing their male partners as often as vice versa.
For example, veteran domestic violence researchers Richard Gelles, Murray Straus, and Susan Steinmetz, who were once hailed by the women's movement for their pioneering work on violence against women, have repeatedly found that women are just as likely as men to physically attack their spouses or partners.
Studies conducted by the Family Research Laboratory at the University of New Hampshire in 1975, 1985, and 1992, found that abuse rates were equal between husbands and wives. In fact, the evidence suggests that abuse of wives by husbands is decreasing, while abuse of husbands by wives is increasing.
Cal State Long Beach professor Martin Fiebert has compiled and summarized 117 different studies with over 72,000 respondents that found that most domestic violence is mutual and, in the cases where there was only one abusive partner, that partner was as likely to be female as male.
Studies by researchers R.I. McNeeley and Coramae Richey Mann show that women are much more likely than men to use weapons and the element of surprise. These weapons often include guns, knives, boiling water, bricks, fireplace pokers and baseball bats.
Neither male nor female domestic violence can generally be dismissed as self-defense. According to Straus, for example, roughly 10 percent of women and 15 percent of men perpetuate partner abuse in self-defense. Dr. David Fontes, the director of Stop Abuse for Everyone (SAFE), has also found that only a small percentage of female abusers are acting in self-defense.
Crime statistics do indicate that women are more likely to suffer serious injury in domestic violence than men are. But such statistics are misleading because surveys show that an abused woman is nine times as likely to report abuse as an abused man. Many men hesitate to call the police because they assume, often correctly, that the police will automatically treat them as if they are the perpetrator.
Nor do husbands murder their wives significantly more than wives murder their husbands. A 1994 Department of Justice study analyzed 10,000 cases and found that women make up over 40 percent of those charged in familial murders. As crime journalist Patricia Pearson explains, because women who murder their husbands tend to use less detectable or traceable methods--such as poisoning (which are often ruled "heart attacks") and hiring others to do the killing (which usually aren't counted as "murders by wives" in official crime statistics), these murders are far less likely to be noticed than murders by men, which are usually committed with guns.
Mainstream feminist organizations, however, have steadfastly maintained that women are only victims of, but rarely perpetrators of, domestic violence. As Pearson points out, such organizations are not doing women any favors. By denying the existence of female batterers, abusive women are not getting the treatment and counseling services that they need. Worse, by allowing them to go unpunished, they are encouraged to believe that they can get away with their abuse indefinitely. This frequently results in escalating abuse of men (and children) and, sometimes, abuse of women when men finally strike back.
Pearson also notes that because feminists deny woman's capacity for violence, the serious problem of lesbian battery--which research clearly indicates is at least as common as heterosexual battery--has been swept under the rug. Sociology professor Claire Renzetti, author of Violent Betrayal: Partner Abuse in Lesbian Relationships, says that lesbian batterers "display a terrifying ingenuity in their selection of abuse tactics, frequently tailoring the abuse to the specific vulnerabilities of their partners."
The list of prominent feminist and female dissidents who are demanding acknowledgment of, and accountability from, female batterers is growing. They include: Canadian Senator Anne Cools, a former shelter director and a pioneer of the battered women's movement; author/activist Erin Pizzey, who set up the first battered women's shelter ever in England in 1971; Cathy Young, author of Ceasefire: Why Women and Men Must Join Forces to Achieve Equality; Donna Laframboise of the Canadian National Post; author and columnist Wendy McElroy, founder of Independent Feminists and herself a former DV victim; Patricia Overberg and Carol Ensign, former and current directors of the Valley Oasis Shelter in Lancaster, California, one of the few domestic violence shelters in the country which accepts men; Christina Hoff Sommers, author of Who Stole Feminism?, which details how feminists obtain inflated domestic violence numbers by lumping "shouting" and "slamming doors" with real domestic abuse; former Women's Studies professor Daphne Patai, author of Professing Feminism; Pearson; Steinmetz; and Renzetti. Recently both the American Medical Association and the Center for Disease Control have issued statements acknowledging the need for attention to male victims of domestic violence.
Familial violence by and against both men and women is a serious problem in a violence-wracked America, but it is a problem for which both men and women share responsibility. Over the past 30 years, feminist activists have justly called abusive men to account for their despicable actions. It's now time to do the same for abusive women. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 2:42:57 AM | I think most women don't get abused but they fear it or have heard of it. Some do get abused especially in the lower echelons of scoiety or sometimes there are still those types of men out there.
Bad statement.
Women do get abused...a lot of women don't fake abuse....and it has nothing to do with education, class or money. An abuser doesn't become any better or worse based on echelons of society.
The problem is; as long as we have people who do not want to realise or reject that some women and as a result children getting abused...we'll have a rough time stopping the abuse.
You see as long as people such as the person with the above quote make comments like that the victim would be to scared to do much for themselves. Scared because they know they will be abused and looked down further….so they rather stay home with the abuser than out with numerous abusers and further humiliation.
Have you ever watched Shattered dreams??????
It's a true story of a woman called Charlotte Fedders married for 17 years to a successful and wealthy lawyer, it's all about domestic violence. Maybe some of you who don't believe it need to watch it.
Do we have to be abused to realise it exists????????
If it hasn't happened to you it may happen to your own loved one then it hurts even more.
So think again.
And finally please stop giving out statistics…..some argue that is not as high as it’s claimed to be………what a sad statement….I say it should be stoped even if it happens to 100 people in the world. Some people make me wonder | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 2:54:19 AM | http://www.amazon.com/Domestic-Violence-Things-Arent-Supposed/dp/1593301227
Domestic Violence: The 12 Things You Aren't Supposed to Know (Paperback)
by Thomas B. James (Author)
Editorial Reviews
Book Description
Is domestic violence strictly a male phenomenon? Are all women who abuse their partners acting in self-defense? Is domestic violence about male privilege, power and control? In this book, the author conducts a meticulous and thorough examination of the research on domestic violence, coming to the unsettling conclusion that virtually everything we think we know about domestic abuse is wrong. Exposing evidence of a deliberate governmental campaign to distort the truth and proliferate lies, Mr. James explains why honesty and candor are our only real hope for bringing an end to this enormous social problem.
Truth Trumps Gender Feminist Propaganda, July 24, 2005
Tom James book, Domestic Violence: The Twelve Things You Aren't Supposed to Know, is an accurate and scholarly work that is long overdue. This book is a breath of fresh air after years of incompetent, ideologically driven, advocacy research by gender feminists who want to deny the cold, hard, documented facts about domestic violence.
For too long America has been presented only a biased view of domestic violence, based on bigoted perceptions of gender roles, rather than documented facts and truth. Such misandrist propaganda and gender feminist myths have created the monstrous domestic violence industry we know today. Such misandrist propaganda has promoted the gender feminist/women's studies agenda that loudly says, "Men are not allowed to be victims of domestic violence." Such misandrist propaganda harms us all.
Tom James is an American hero for presenting abundant scholarly documentation that solidly tells the truth about domestic violence. James honestly shows the degree to which men are not only victims of domestic violence; he also illuminates how all men are disserved by America's corrupt domestic violence industry.
Tom James abundantly backs up his proof with supporting documentation and footnotes. Contrast Tom James's solid research against the call for ignorance and more prejudice, towards male victims of domestic violence, that many in today's domestic violence industry are want to do.
Any sane, rational person reading this book will not only see the "hate war" that is being waged against America's men by the gender feminist ideologues in America's domestic violence industry, he/she will also see the underlying, obdurate pathology that makes those propagandist so totally unfit to handle the truth about domestic violence. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 4:45:41 AM | I've got way to much to do, why don't you say what you want in a sentence without making me get on a website
we all live busy lives, you are certainly not special for having one of them.
i put up the web url so you could take the time at your convenience to check out some very real facts about the THREAD TOPIC, which you seem to be mistaken about.
As usual, you are going to misinterpret what I said and then argue some self -evident point.
as usual indeed! i was not argueing a point, you made some statements that make it evident that you have gotten some misinformation somewhere or are just making assumptions based on no fact. what i did was offer you an opportunity for clarity by giving you that url. that url is linked to many that will offer information on several areas of abuse globally.
which brings me to your next argumentative bashing point.
the thread topic is >"DO WOMEN GET ABUSED AS MUCH AS THEY SAY OR DO THEY MAKE IT SEEM WORSE THAN IT ACTUALLY IS"
from all the stories posted here, the numbers from actual canadian and US, and global studies on the matter, the numbers found it is clear that yes,, we get abused as much as we say. yes there are women who lie about it, but they are a very minute minority of reported abuse by WOMEN.
So your going to get me to talk about women abuse and I'm not taking the bait, I'm here to talk about men abuse and to say that men abuse is just as bad if not worse.
i cant MAKE U do anything, what i can do is suggest that u make another thread, because this thread is not about abuse against men. its about abuse against women. this is certainly not to say that men dont get abused, either in or outside the prison walls. but your right, they dont report it. that doesnt lessen the fact that women get abused, or lessen the trauma of a man being abused. it just is what it is,, something that isnt reported
on the last for this post>>
women like yourself make it known when they are abused.
i dont know what women like myself do, but i can tell you this, and get this please, because you are treading on thin ground pal. I DO NOT, wear my experience with being abused on my shirtsleeve. I HAVE worked very hard to cope and get past the trauma of it. I DO NOT go around lamenting about the various incidents and episodes.
but i also do not demean women who do that, if it helps them then so be it. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 4:45:49 AM | Sorry to say and the fraile male ego will rear its ugly head for this, but men may get abused and not say anything about it but even if they did its a small percentage and always will be. Why? Because men are more abusive. Why do I make such a statement? Because they are taught from an early age to be strong and fight and not have feelings, or cry, or express their feelings. Guess what? All that bottle up stuff gets dumped on the ones they supposedly love, like thier kids, wife, family , and friends. They do not know how to handle the anger inside them. They take it out on innocent victoms.
Now lets talk about the obvious. MEN ARE STRONGER THAN WOMEN. Duh unless the women is a body builder and works out everyday and can lift 150 pounds over her head she is like most women, we are not as strong as men. Why? Thats the way God made us.
Now with these 2 obvious points let me speak to the nay sayers and the percentage screamers, what on earth is wrong with you? I know. Men have fragile egos and do not want to have their reputations in the toilet. Even if they are not abusive they stick up for other men who are just because they want to protect the male species from being painted as bad guys. Hay I can understand that. But facts are facts Jack. Real men are so discusted by abusers that they want to do everything they could to stop it and help the men who do abuse , and even better help the women who are abused. Where are these real men you say? Well unfortunatly there isn't too many because men would dispise them if they saw their fellow men helping abused women. Wouldn't that be a novel idea. Instead they would rather sweep it under the rug and cry foul, women abuse too. Give me a break. Can ya get your head out of your a.. long enough to see what is going on? You all can't be that much in denial. Well from the posts I am seeing denial is something many chose rather than face the raw truth.
I suppose women make up the pain from childbirth too. Its a walkin the park and we just like to make it up for the heck of it. You men are a sorry excuse for men. I would be ashamed of myself for the way your acting. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 4:55:43 AM | | PS Just sharing from own experience. One time my ex punched me closed fist in the face so hard I lifted a foot off the ground and landed on my back. I was in such a daze I could not even see. Yes I making this all up. Its a lie lol. I just have nothing better to do. All men are perfect and never abuse women and they should let all wife murderers out child molesters, rapests you name it out of jail. We should give them a party and say how sorry for making you go to jail when its all just made up. We asked for it. Men are just little angels. lol I just can not take this idiodic conversation anymore. Its just sickening and scary. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 5:13:09 AM |
Why? Because men are more abusive. Why do I make such a statement? Because they are taught from an early age to be strong and fight and not have feelings, or cry, or express their feelings. Guess what? All that bottle up stuff gets dumped on the ones they supposedly love, like thier kids, wife, family , and friends. They do not know how to handle the anger inside them. They take it out on innocent victoms.
http://www.glennsacks.com/4_feminists_myths.htm
Myth #4: Mothers are children's "first line of defense" against child abuse.
In reality it is mothers, not fathers, who commit the overwhelming majority of child abuse, neglect, and parental murder. According to the US Department of Justice, 70% of confirmed cases of child abuse and 65% of parental murders of children are committed by mothers, not fathers.
According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, adjusting for the greater number of single mothers, a custodial mother is five times as likely to murder her own children as a custodial father is. A study of confirmed child abuse cases published in the Journal of Child Abuse and Neglect found that mothers abuse their children two and a half times as often as fathers. The Third National Incidence Study of Child Abuse and Neglect (1996) found that children are 88% more likely to be seriously injured from abuse or neglect by their mothers than by their fathers.
Twenty-five years ago feminists played a heroic role in advocating for abused women and publicizing the despicable crime of wife-beating. Today, unfortunately, their refusal to acknowledge violence by women stands in the way of eliminating domestic violence for everyone--not only women, but men and children as well. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 5:28:07 AM | You know what?..I wouldn't wish what I have experienced on my worst enemy.
But I am absolutely appalled by the level of denial and ignorance by some of the men here... THIS is why woman abuse still happens...THIS is why women do not come forward. I don't wear my abuse on my sleeve either.. it's not something I talk about in my daily life..but it happened and I have talked to MANY others who have experienced it also. It is NOT a rare occurence...it is not a fantasy...and it is males who are more likely (and capable) of violence. Yes there are some women also...the key term here is SOME.
So take your denial, ignorance and rebuttal "stats" and shove them up your ...well
I won't live with my head in the sand...and I won't allow society to either..we aren't going to shut up..we aren't going away...we are going to put it in your faces until it STOPS, until it becomes unthinkable for anyone to abuse another.
ONE instance of abuse...is too many. | |
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| Do women really get abused as much as they say or do they make it seem worse then it actually is?
Posted: 10/12/2007 5:31:59 AM | | Cedar77 I am sure mothers abuse their children, but I find it hard to believe your statistics when Most of my friends growning up were abused by their fathers, emotionally verbally, physically and even sexually. Unfortunalty many men leave as they can not handle the responsiblity of raising kids or want to work to help support them or pay child support. Again the rates are so much higher in men abandoning the women and kids. Of course that is not abuse. Not having a father. Are you guys taught to be this nieve or did you take a class on it. lol | |
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