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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/16/2009 10:56:11 AM | another email i received, makes you think ....
Her hair was up in a pony tail,
Her favorite dress tied with a bow.
Today was Daddy's Day at school,
And she couldn't wait to go.
But her mommy tried to tell her,
That she probably should stay home.
Why the kids might not understand,
If she went to school alone.
But she was not afraid;
She knew just what to say.
What to tell her classmates
Of why he wasn't there today.
But still her mother worried,
For her to face this day alone.
And that was why once again,
She tried to keep her daughter home.
But the little girl went to school
Eager to tell them all.
About a dad she never sees
A dad who never calls. There were daddies along the wall in back,
For everyone to meet.
Children squirming impatiently,
Anxious in their seats
One by one the teacher called
A student from the class.
To introduce their daddy,
As seconds slowly passed.
At last the teacher called her name,
Every child turned to stare.
Each of them was searching,
A man who wasn't there.
'Where's her daddy at?'
She heard a boy call out.
'She probably doesn't have one,'
Another student dared to shout.
And from somewhere near the back,
She heard a daddy say,
'Looks like another deadbeat dad,
Too busy to waste his day.'
The words did not offend her,
As she smiled up at her Mom.
And looked back at her teacher,
Who told her to go on.
And with hands behind her back,
Slowly she began to speak.
And out from the mouth of a child,
Came words incredibly unique.
'My Daddy couldn't be here,
Because he lives so far away.
But I know he wishes he could be,
Since this is such a special day.
And though you cannot meet him,
I wanted you to know.
All about my daddy,
And how much he loves me so.
He loved to tell me stories
He taught me to ride my bike.
He surprised me with pink roses,
And taught me to fly a kite.
We used to share fudge sundaes,
And ice cream in a cone.
And though you cannot see him.
I'm not standing here alone.
'Cause my daddy's al ways with me,
Even though we are apart
I know because he told me,
He'll forever be in my heart'
With that, her little hand reached up,
And lay across her chest.
Feeling her own heartbeat,
Beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere here in the crowd of dads,
Her mother stood in tears.
Proudly watching her daughter,
Who was wise beyond her years.
For she stood up for the love
Of a man not in her life.
Doing what was best for her,
Doing what was right.
And when she dropped her hand back down,
Staring straight into the crowd.
She finished with a voice so soft,
But its message clear and loud.
'I love my daddy very much,
he's my shining star.
And if he could, he'd be here,
But heaven's just too far.
You see he is a Brittish soldier
And died just this past year
When a roadside bomb hit his convoy
And taught Britians to fear.
But sometimes when I close my eyes,
it's like he never went away.'
And then she closed her eyes,
And saw him there that day.
And to her mothers amazement,
She witnessed with surprise.
A room full of daddies and children,
All starting to close their eyes.
Who knows what they saw before them,
Who knows what they felt inside.
Perhaps for merely a second,
They saw him at her side.
'I know you're with me Daddy,'
To the silence she called out.
And what happened next made believers,
Of those once filled with doubt.
Not one in that room could explain it,
For each of their eyes had been closed.
But there on the desk beside her,
Was a fragrant long-stemmed rose.
And a child was blessed, if only for a moment,
By the love of her shining star.
And given the gift of believing,
That heaven is never too far. | |
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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/17/2009 10:40:28 PM | A better quote, IMO, is the last lines of Owen's poem:
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie; Dulce et Decorum est
Pro patria mori.
Anyone else feeling something missing today?
Although the OP was specifically about Father's Day, I think about my Dad every day - he's always a missing part of my life.
I feel so sorry for my two children who's father has written himself out of their life and either doesn't care enough or is too proud to do anything to rectify the situation. I know my father won't come back. They know he could yet won't. | |
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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/18/2009 1:43:07 AM | | I know, Wilfred Owen is one of my favourite poets, Red Lips were nere so red, etc. I went to see the play Not About Heroes, which was based on his life and Siegfried Sasoon and their campagne against lies and cruelty. That was my intention with the quote, but explain that to a child. Governments have a lot to answer for, and they hide behind a faceted face., Aniese Iam with you on this one. But the poem was nice. | |
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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/18/2009 2:46:53 AM | hi everyone, I lost my dad about 8years ago dec 17 , my gran 6 years dec 15 and my husband 4 years ago on dec 1st, and some friends in between, my 30s have been full of joy LOL
but in relation to that poem its beautuful and so captures some of what my son feels and any child of a young age, my friend sent me that on facebook.
fathers day is one of the toughest days for him more so now at 15 and this time of year for both of us even 4 years on. it never goes away but can tell you some things ease others never do, wounds are very different to lose your dad at 11 to being an adult.
to any father who doesnt bother with there children, how foolish they are. they will come to regret eventually and it becomes too late to reverse.
im so grateful that my son at least for a short time had an exceptional father
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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/18/2009 7:47:15 AM | | My dad died when he was 46. I was 21. This is 34 years ago, and yet still I wish he was here. When my first book was accepted for publication, my agent asked if it was autobiographical: I said, no (it was a 3 vol fantasy,) and only now realise that it was actually all about my dad, about the necessity for accepting death. The difficulty of accepting it. My very best wishes for the other contributors here: it's a hard journey, but has strange byways... would I ever have had a book published without it? | |
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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/18/2009 8:08:56 AM | It's just over 2 years since my Dad died, and it was a difficult time, as I'm sure it is for everyone. But the deep conversations I had with him up to the day before,(Which I miss so much) about life, death and everything, actually helped me to come to terms with what had been a huge mental block about death. The stuff I said to him, to help him come to terms with it, have helped me. I now have an acceptance if this scary and inevitable thing. It was ever thus. This is our time, and then it's not.
All our ancestors probably accepted it better than us, we are insulated against death in our culture, IMO. We should run at it screaming!
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Dylan Thomas | |
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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/18/2009 5:21:25 PM |
But the deep conversations I had with him up to the day before,(Which I miss so much) about life, death and everything, actually helped me to come to terms with what had been a huge mental block about death.
Same here. I didn't see my father often, purely because of the hours he worked, when I was available to see him, he'd be sleeping etc.
He called at my house unexpectedly on the Thursday, he was never one to just call- he had a stupid fear of imposing and being in the way.
We spoke for ages in a way that we hadn't for years. We weren't overly affectionate but I gave him a kiss and hugged him when he left that day. He also left a Christmas card (it was only 6th of December) and was proud that he'd actually bought a 'special' card.
5am Friday morning I am woken up by knocking on the door and find two police officers on my doorstep. I knew instantly it was about my Dad.
I think my Dad actually knew he was going to die, sounds strange, but I can't think of any other reason he would call to see me...it was so out of character. | |
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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/18/2009 5:54:09 PM | Last time i saw my Dad it was on March 27th 2008 which was the second anniversary of my Mum's passing. We went to the Crematorium and when my son said to him "ahh you alright there Grandddad?" (dad was crying) my dad replying "Yeah im alright Jakey boy just the wind blowing in my eyes", which was so like him
He dropped me off home and i asked him if he was coming in for a cup of tea and some dinner and he said no because he wanted to go and see my sisters kids before he drove back to Camberley where he was working. He went home to Dorset the next morning because he didnt feel that well, we put it down to the upset of the previous day.
On the Saturday i didnt get my call from him but didnt think too much of it and expected him to ring Sunday, he didnt. Instead i got a call from my Sister asking me to go over there to look after her kids while she popped out but it didnt sit right, i just knew it was my dad.
I got there and noticed my other sisters car was there and i just knew it, she opened the door and i literally just said "please tell me its not my dad" and she was crying and said "im so sorry, i cant."
He had passed away on the Saturday at the grand old age of 55.
The coroner had to order an autopsy and one of the things he said to my aunts was that the doctor had seen my dad on Friday and asked him to go into hospital for some tests, my dad said he would go in monday. obviously Monday never came for him.
18 months later i miss him every single day, i think about him and my mum at least 10 times a day and miss them both so much but its worse, in a way, with my dad because he died suddenly. i really wish he had come in for that cup of tea and sometimes i even forget for a split second that he is gone. Even today when i was walking the dog on the new estate they are building over here, i thought "Me Dad could have worked here and lived at my place while he was working but the buildings are up now" and then it hit me again that he isnt here anymore.
He could mend broken zips, thats something only dads can do. He was so big and strong and quite yet with such a funny sense of humour.
My Nan (his Mum) is still alive and she is shattered emotionally. She takes an hour every day to do the rosary for him and sobs the whole way through it. All of us miss him so much. The only consolation i get is that he is with my Mum and that one day i will be with them again | |
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| Father's Day - Memories of Dads No Longer With Us
Posted: 11/19/2009 3:23:20 AM | apart from being my hero (and a hero to others but I wont go into that) and being a dad who, one december night, heard me praying to God to get me a bicycle for Christmas (circa 1960) and he did (dad not God) the fact that he could do anything, make things, mend things (cars,boats, any thing) and was a total reasurance in life, aswell as educating and making our family social aware by international travel..he was a good man and a gentleman, and I find it hard to meet men these days that can match him, they fall short of the yardstick. The most piercing memory I have of him, shortly before his death, is on a railway platform at Doncaster station 12.00 midnight, waiting for the Kings Cross Train with my sister on it. He walked down the platform away from me, he was wearing a long cream wool coat and pale trousers...the mist on that January night swirled and enveloped him and he turned to look at me, and I immediately was agasped as I saw him floating..in that mist..and he knew it to. I truly believe that he envisiged his death...and I truly believed that that was a sign for me. I love you dad, Keep hold of mum till we get there. | |
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