| What is Baggage?
Posted: 8/4/2007 3:44:45 PM | Whenever a woman has unresolved issues from a previous relationship it always carry
over to the next, this would be called baggage.
Its not up to the new guy she,s dating to help sort this out. She should keep herself off
the circuit until she lets it go. | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 8/4/2007 3:58:31 PM | | Baggage comes from past life experience, but it's not the experience itself. Baggage is a lesson not yet learned, accepted and moved on from. Once someone embraces their baggage, learns the lesson they need to learn, they can let it go - and move on with their life. It then transforms from baggage to "something that happened". They've learned to let the weight of the baggage go, and incorportate the lessons into the fiber of their being - it helps them take on the future with wisdom, grace and maturity. | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 8/4/2007 4:04:42 PM | | To me baggage means emotional damage unhealed and carried into the next relationship. Not so sure that really caring about a women entails providing protection, I mean beating down purse snatchers and answering the door when Jehova's come is all good, but I think a better recipe for success is taking responsibility for your own emotional well being. If you can't do it yourself, no one else will. | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 8/4/2007 4:11:09 PM |
Everyone has a bit of baggage. Do all your issues fit into "carry-on" baggage, or do you have to hire a sky-cab to wheel around you're baggage? That is really the question.
I tend to think some "baggage", for lack of a better term, is helpful to a relationship.
On the other hand... who has the life skills to determine what size "baggage" a person should have? If anyone tells me I have baggage as a means to excuse their ignorance, I certainly hope they had better be carrying an empty bag.
I consider those who deem a person as having too much baggage, as a person who has issues about coping with others... it's a weak excuse for their own ignorance and lack of effort. Some people have past issues that were way beyond their control... how can you properly judge/criticise a person for that?
In fact, I'd be willing to bet if that person (with baggage) was accepted, loved and shown some respect rather than ignorance, their issues would (for the most part) fade as the relationship strengthened.
Most people who use the term "baggage" use it as a cop out for not admitting their own mistakes in the relationship and/or their mistake in selecting the wrong potential mate.
I have a tendency to scrutinise those who use that term when things don't go well. | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 9/26/2007 12:52:08 PM | Is baggage considered to be a red flag ?! or would that depend on the type of issues the person has?
I'm confussed by this whole term because I do not consider myself as having baggage per se but rather life experiences that have made me who I am today... whether those be good or bad traits. | |
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AlexSB
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Joined: 6/29/2006
Msg: 30 | |
| What is Baggage?
Posted: 9/26/2007 12:58:20 PM | What is baggage? in point form:
1) Crazy ex-boyfriends
2) Children
3) Family issues
4) More than nessecary emotions
Basically anything that could cause drama or affect your relationship. I'm really not into drama. I'm a laid back guy. I'm always chill. I expect the same from my partner. | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 9/26/2007 1:00:13 PM | if you really care about a person and want to try really hard to make things work..you wouldn't let the "baggage" bother you that much...
some people are so "high demand" that they let the littlest of things screw the relationship up for them... | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 9/26/2007 2:51:10 PM |
Some men hold it against a woman because she has been taken advantage of or even abused by men, so is now cautious about trusting another man. Don't you call this baggage sometimes? Why? A woman has a right to protect herself, and she should not believe you just because you say ..."not all men are like that. I'm not"..., expecting her to just trust you without even knowing you?
It's a fine line there OP but I would not consider that baggage, nor would I hold that against a woman. Most all people have been hurt in relationships to some degree throughout our lives, some more and some less. If I'm getting to know a woman and she is a bit cautious, but is honest and tells me because she has been through such and such thing in her past, it's not a bad thing. First off, she does not know who I am from a man on the moon. It shows me that at least she did not stay in a bad relationship and that even though she is cautious, she is moving forward. Why rush? Why would I expect her to trust me right away? No reason too rush, I would want a woman to see through my actions and through time that she could trust me and that I'm not like the same types she was used to from her past.
Sometimes it's harder for the other person without the "baggage" issues to almost judge the other person if they don't trust us right away. Sometimes it's easy to think to ourselves, "but wait I know who I am, I would never hurt this person so why can't they trust me? oh they have baggage, issues" that is not right to do to anyone. Yes we all know who we are as people ourselves, but others don't so give them time is how I see it, it's only fair.
The only time it crosses a line is when the person with the "baggage" lets the past make them so angry or so non trusting, that they refuse to really allow another person to come into their life and give them a chance. A strong foundation for a relationship takes time, I have no problem building that and proving my trust to a woman whom might show interest in me. All that I would expect is, at least the person is honest, truly wants a relationship, and will give me a chance to show her I can be trusted. | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 9/26/2007 3:07:47 PM |
What is Baggage?
my ex lol,seriouslywas married for 15 one of them happy somewhere lol,with each passing year got worse so i said 1 more year starting at 8 years of marriage so finally gotten to the point by the 15 year couldnt deal with it anymore u wouldnt beleive how much i was in debt 90% out of it now,tried to suck it up and deal with it but no can do,should have mentioned for most of the 15 years she didnt work just sat around the house nothing got done,but everyone has their terminology of the word "baggage" | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 9/26/2007 8:33:49 PM | Baggage is soft sided, zipper equipped boxes for carrying personal items during travel. I have baggage in 22", 26" and 30" sizes in my closet. I can fit a lot of clothes into the big one, not quite so much into the smaller two sizes. But on the other hand, I can carry the 22" or 26" onto the plane, whereas the 30" must be checked in with airline personnel and carried in the cargo compartment of the airplane.
Oh you mean....oh!
I'd say relationship baggage is anything you have from past relationships that a future mate might not want to deal with. | |
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| What is Baggage?
Posted: 9/26/2007 11:05:08 PM | This is the age old “which came first the chicken or the egg” there is really no right or wrong answer….
IMO….at the end of the day we all have some sort of baggage to carry…it defines who we are, but it’s how we deal with it....thats a different story……….. | |
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