| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 7:27:56 AM | The term "drinking" covers such a broad spectrum that it can mean whatever we want. I know many different kinds of drinkers, from the daily to the rarely, and many in between. Some people are weekenders, party hearty and then back to work for a week, others have a drink or 2 at the end of everyday, sometimes stopping at a pub after work, or maybe after settling in at home.
There are few others to whom everyday is a party, and are willing to drink to excess everyday. Some that will drink alone, and others that would never consider that. I can certainly understand folks that have had bad experiences with drinkers preferring to pass on those who do, but what people will indicate on their profile is only how they see themselves, and may not reality.
I don't think it's the amount of times a week somebody has a drink that's most important, but how the amount they drink affects those involved in their lives. You can't start a relationship with somebody over 45 and expect them to change the habits of a lifetime, at this stage it's what you see is what you get. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 7:59:17 AM | I have mixed thoughts on drinking. My marriage was ruined because my husband stopped at the bar each and every day, came home drunk, and continued to down a 30 pack from when he finally got home at 7:30 to when he went to bed at 1am. You can't have a life that works with somebody who's that pickled every day, lol. You can't have a conversation, and if you do, it won't be remembered the next day. Myself, I have a beer or some wine every now and again. I find it hits me differently now that I'm older. I've had 3 different Drs tell me that I should have a 6 oz glass of wine each day with supper for the health benefits and to encourage my appetite. Do I do it? Heck no...6 oz of wine would either make me go whooooo hooooooo or to the sofa for a nap: zzzzzzzzzzz. Also, I won't drink alone, even if it is seen as a healthful thing. I wouldn't avoid somebody who had drinks 3X/week, or even every day (if it was one glass with a meal.) Since they are now saying it's beneficial to our health to have a glass a day, I don't see how somebody who's following that protocol can be said to have a problem with drinking. One glass worth a day is not the same as drinking half the bottle (or the whole bottle.)
I think it more depends on how they drink. Do they drink alone? Do they have to have that drink? Are they looking for the buzz, or are they just having one to be sociable, or with their meal? Does a drink change their personality? Just because they get more 'happy' when they're drinking, (as opposed to a bad attitude), doesn't mean they are not having alcohol problems. I don't put anybody down for drinking, it's their choice, and you can't change someone. I have a drink when I go out with the girlfriends, but I pace myself, don't drive, and I don't do it every day, every weekend or every month...it's only once in a blue moon. I spent lots of time with AA and Alanon counselors trying to understand alcoholism and why my (ex) hubby had such a problem with it. I learned you can't change somebody who doesn't want to change for themselves; some won't stop even though they're having heart and health problems from it. If I see somebody with a habitual drinking problem like, I might be friends with them, but that's as close as they'll ever get to my heart. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 9:50:22 AM | | Have to agree with msg 41...you said it well. I like a glass of wine with dinner *sometimes*...I generally don't do it at home unless I'm having company for a special dinner, and may go many months without doing that, but then I may go out several times in one week for dinner and end up having a glass at each dinner (and since I'm usually driving I limit my consumption to 1-2 glasses depending on how long I'm out for - and the size of the glass; some places here serve it in a shot glass sized wineglass while others are bigger than a normal one is). What I get concerned about are those who *have* to have a drink all the time, or those who can have one drink, and can't handle it. Being an alcoholic doesn't mean one drinks 'too much' meaning in quantity ...it's that regardless of how much, or how little, they drink, they can't handle it, e.g. it changes their personality. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 10:52:29 AM | It is one thing to be a drunk and another to have a couple of drinks a few days a week.
I might have some wine or a beer with dinner. Then again I might not .
I can't even recall the last time I drank to excess.
OK I do remember but it was in Hussongs Cantina in Ensenada Mexico. What happens in Mexico stays in Mexico. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 1:21:54 PM | | There is nothing better then a fine wine every night | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 2:34:28 PM | well ,Claypot in responce to your question ...IF you like,or your interest is peeked then by all means *look* without commiting! You stated that in your family history of drunk,and then marrying one TRUST in yourself You can pick the drunk out of the meet and greet! Then *RUN* the hell in the other direction :)
I know some as you call them *drunks*,I also know some *alcoholics* and I also know some that drink more than 3 times a week. I am sure You know what it is you want... non drinker... OMG NO Im a social drinker 7 days a week! ;) a glass of wine with dinner and then the bottle is gone...hmmmm
#1 Drunks canNOT hide
#2 Alcoholics are drunks that do NOT hide
#3 Social drinking is like social smoking... you still do it!
and did You know the first drink was served in of all things,YES a Claypot ;)
Drinking 3 times a week or more: depends on the person,their social upbringing
: is a statement that says,Yes I drink and I always will
fact of the matter is YOU do Know what you don't want right? be very very careful out there
 | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 3:02:01 PM | | There is a big difference between being a social drinker, and self medicating because you can deal with life without it. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 5:13:01 PM | | Moderate drinking is actually healthy. Numerous studies have shown that a drink or two a day is good for you. Beyond that, and it can be a negative health risk, and of course there are people who can't stop or don't know their limits and overdo it. | |
|
ksue44
|
Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 59 | |
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 6:08:17 PM | Oh good grief, if my nightly glass of white wine portrays me as a heavy drinker, what next? The last time I felt like death warmed over is when I overdosed on prune juice  Anything in life that is done to excess is not a good thing. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 7:13:10 PM | | Yep, I too was married to someone who was an alcoholic but described himself as a "social drinker". He turned into an aggressive, abusive monster when he drank. When I asked him to consider seeking help with his problem, his response was "You're the one who has the problem with alcohol" followed by "I can quit anytime I want to". Divorce proceedings followed shortly thereafter - commenced by me. You betcha I take careful note of how much alcohol a prospective partner imbibes and also how it affects his personality. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 7:52:33 PM | If you (meaning people in general) have read about alcoholism they will have heard of people who are........... what are called " dry alcoholics" These are people who have all the behaviours of an alcoholic but don't drink alcohol.
So, a sober person can be just as cold, indifferent, volatile or abusive as a person who drinks.
Muskoka | |
|
ryn48
|
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 62 | |
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 8:12:30 PM | | I enjoy a small glass of wine a night with my dinner. I like to experiment with wines I have never tried before. Sometimes it turns out good, sometimes not to my liking. I don't like to overdo it, even when out with friends. Everything in moderation. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/21/2007 8:13:38 PM | | I drink about 2 or 3 drinks a year and sometimes not even that. Perfer water and juices and some soft drinks. Never been much of a drinker | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 2:02:40 AM | OP: I put the use of alcohol on the back burner years ago...my need for clarity
and having all my faculties working on a continuous basis being the reason.
Answering your question gave me pause for thought....does this person use it
as a crutch or as an ocassional relaxant? Do they have a glass of wine with
dinner or a beer or twelve?
I think it depends on their consumption and dependence upon it.
And like someone else pointed out on here...I can detect an alcohol
user a mile away and will go the extra mile to avoid them. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 3:25:16 AM | Let's not forget the person who I call the functioning alcoholic. Someone who drinks daily, catches their buzz, then is able to get up every day and head to work, with or without the hang over.
That was both my dad and X. The scarey thing about someone like that, they don't remember what happened the nite before. But to them they have it under control because they got up and made a living every day.
Wine seems to be the over 45 stimulant, I never have gotten use to the taste of wine. In fact I don't even care for the taste of any type alchol, I'm a foo foo drinker, lol, it needs to be sugar coated or I can't drink it. | |
|
Tramp
|
Joined: 2/8/2007
Msg: 66 | |
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 4:33:36 AM | Drinking can be pleasurable; to me sitting at an out door table with some food, a bottle of wine is what to some a day at the beach, a game of golf is, and, if my favorite lady sits with me, so much the better.
I drink one or two glasses of wine almost daily,.. Three loosen my tongue, a bottle puts me to sleep, which is good.
This time of the year there is nothing better than a steak, medium rare, some of those white, small onions, Portobello mushrooms and a few Heinekens… Hmmm, maybe that’s what I’ll have tonight, but first let’s goes to work.
Good day to all. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 5:27:34 AM | for me a couple of beers on the weekend..
any drinking days were burned out in my 20s..
now a nice bottle of wine or a couple cool beers around the campfire for me..
dusty | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 7:59:48 AM | | Do what ever you want to! One drink? a year! sure does not make you one. I put that much alcohol on scratches and wounds in a week. Personal, I hate to be around a loud mouth drunk ~ but drinking does not have to lead to that ~ yet it does for many. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 11:54:31 AM | The same thing happened to me. I used to be able to drink beer day and night. I could get drunker than anyone and still get up to make formation and run PT.
I lost my taste for beer a few years ago and do not like the way alcohol makes me feel.
I now like to be in control of myself and keep my wit's about me.
If I drink beer or anything with alcohol, I pay the price for it, so I no longer drink.
I tried to drink a few beers while on the beach a few weeks ago. It mad me feel so bad, that I swore that I would never drink again.
Being an ex policeman and having worked in bars, I can't stand to be around a drunk. When my wife starts drinking, she gets mean, so I just go to bed before anything starts.
You ask: What do, you do when you run across a profile that states plainly they are a drinker?
Personally, I would not respond to it unless she was the type to only drink at a party or have a glass of wine when you go out to eat.
Drinkers and nondrinkers in a marriage/LTR , generally do not mix well - IMO. | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 12:22:53 PM | K ... so last night I tried it, just to see if I was still able. I'll be the first to admit that I can't do what I could do when I was in my teens. I got through 31 glasses of red wine and if I really pushed myself I could probably do the last 14 this afternoon. But I'm afraid that "Drinking over 45", in one sitting at least, is going to have to go into the bin with all the other parts of my lost youth. So sad to admit this, sometimes ...
Has anyone else noticed that the printing on the POF forums is exceptionally blurry today ??
cdn guy | |
|
| |
bayrab
|
Joined: 5/16/2007
Msg: 72 | |
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 1:17:43 PM | | eeeeuuuuwwwwww... wine hangovers are the worst! | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 1:58:02 PM | | CDN my concern is that you may be whining.......LOL! | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 3:51:08 PM | | Muskoa gold how do you know my ex wife? | |
|
| Drinking over 45
Posted: 6/22/2007 4:39:58 PM | In the not to distant past I could down whiskey like it was water! One guy friend used to save me the "corner" of his whiskey bottle just to see me chug it and smile and smack my lips after. Ahhh...can't do that anymore. The thought of it makes me ill.
Still, I do have "girls night out" with a couple of friends. Two others are single and two are married. We get together every other thursday night (none of us have to work the next day). We gather up our fav foods and wine, meet at one of the single female homes and party down. We're all over 50 and one just turned 60. We bad??? | |
|
Home
login 
