| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 7:45:20 AM | personally..i think when someone reads a profile they like, the fantasy of all possibilities start to take shape in their mind. wishful thinking is a lovely daydream and does wonders for the soul! if the profile makes you smile or think more why not share the thought with a rose! who doesnt love an action like that.
is it a red flag? heck no! the roses and other items get tossed around like candy falling out of its bin in a store display..akin to confetti in celebrations. same goes for the favorites list. neither the favorites or email gifts are red flags for anything!
if you think they are red flags thats only because you've discounted your chances with the person before contacting them through self-esteem issues you have. thats a failing on your part, not the other person in question. | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 7:54:01 AM | Trying to discern motivations of people who have a bit of well or poorly written text out on "teh intraweb" is like herding cats.
It doesn't need to be that complicated. Quit over-thinking everything. We're not as smart as we think we are when it comes to identifying red flags or none of us would even be on this site. | |
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tdh46
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Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 28 | |
| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 7:57:18 AM | "At the end of the day, with few exceptions, until and unless i'm in a relationship with a woman, what's been going on between her and other men just isn't my business" Well said swamphunter.
Are we really that insecure about ourselves that we are now worried about who someone sends fake roses to????? do you have any idea just how silly that is? It scream insecure.
Some of us expect the person we are chatting with to only be talking to us and no one else, are we scared we can't compete with others, is it a fear of losing out?.
If something as silly as a fake rose is going to stop you from reaching out to someone, then internet dating might not be for you. your ego might be a tad too fragile for it. | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 8:00:45 AM | If the man I want to write has no roses, I write them anyway. They have no clue who I/You are at this point, or maybe they looked at your profile and didn't write for whatever reason. By writing someone, it gives you the opportunity to introduce yourself and make an impression. I have had men tell me, I am interested in someone, or be very receptive to my email. A virtual rose is a virtual rose, and not an indicator of anything more than that. If it's more than that, you will figure it out- life is about risk, Take ONE!
One more thing, my good friend is on here, and he sent me a virtual rose to thank me for being a good friend. We have been friends for years, so no interest in me on any other level that just friends.
I say GO FOR IT- don't be jealous, just enjoy meeting new people and if something happens and you hit the POF lottery- that's the cherry!
D | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 8:16:09 AM | If I see anyone online who might interest me, I definitely would contact him. Even if he does not have roses to give. We do not know when he sent his roses out. We do not know the reaction of the recipient. I was sent a rose once prior to the man even having contacted me before. When I saw the "Be Mine", it made me sceptical. He corresponded for a short while, plans were made to meet, and he never followed through.
My feeling is not to read anything into the roses and gifts. The only thing that really matters is when two people meet and click. The rest is window dressing. | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 8:24:19 AM | [How about if you have exchanged emails and they were good, exchanged phone numbers and possibly spoken on the phone, and you noticed they sent someone a rose because they had two the day before, does that make you cautious? Take a step back and wonder about it maybe?]
All the advice given you has merit. There may be compitition but that could be a good thang! or she may be a very caring person.
If the conversations have been good then keep them that way. It dosen't hurt to take a step back though, afterall; this is only a place to "meet" and what comes of it when off the site is a different thing . Follow your instincts, I'm sure they have helped with decisions before. | |
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Karen5
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Joined: 4/11/2007
Msg: 32 | |
| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 8:42:01 AM |
Are you really that paranoid that you can read into someone's mind, or someone's intentions because a virtual emoticon is used? Let's be honest, unless the roses are real, from a real florist, then they are quite meaningless.
Do you really believe a girl is going to say "Oh My God - He Sent Me Free Fake Roses; I Love Him!". Come on now.
LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm more inclined to fall in love with someone who sends me one of these in the middle of summer:  | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 8:46:10 AM | The "roses" feature is just one of many poor PoF features. I think it's supposed to indicate "availability" (no roses) or "hey I want to get in your pants" or something like that (that's why you aren't available, you're smitten with at least 1 if not 2 other people). I wouldn't put too much stock in the "roses" feature.
It's just a little bit better than the totally useless "classify yourself as a fish" feature. | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 8:48:32 AM | Hmmm...Frankly I think there are already way too many dumb things people assign red flags to.
Let's not add another. | |
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aTaha
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Joined: 12/7/2006
Msg: 35 | |
| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 8:55:03 AM | The rose is a 'be mine' rose. So if I see someone with 1 or 0 roses, I assume theyre pursuing someone and would not be as open to my advances. Since I am sparing with my advances, I choose not to email people with less than 2 roses.
I personally would not use a virtual rose. Once I'm past the initial online meeting phase and I'm out into the real world, I leave the virtual stuff behind.
So no.. I wouldn't email them. However, I also wouldn't email a lady who has an abundance of spelling or grammatical errors in their profile (Laziness. Spellchecking is not very difficult), or woman who has their picture up for rating (do you really need the validation?), or a woman who has rated other people's images (why would you do this?), or a woman who states she's looking for someone good-looking, handsome, cute, etc (We're ALL looking for a certain level of looks. It's an inherent thing. But to come out and say it means what you're looking for is probably beyond what I can provide).
Just my 2 cents.
Taha | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 9:06:53 AM | I would disagree that the 'roses' are a poor feature of POF.
Not everything in life is used for it's intended purpose....a book as a door wedge, cola can as an ashtray etc.
The 'Online Dating Garden' features flowers, thorns, weeds, plastic flowers too.
Point being no-one truly knows who is who or what they are until some time 'down the line'.
That line can be shortened with sage (herb/pun) useage of those digital roses.
I'm not on this website for my own health. I'm here to find a good woman on the same wavelength, as most guys are too I guess.
Use those digital roses to find a real flower not waste time with a plastic flower.
Fish Personalities  Digital Roses <img src=http://www.plentyoffish.com/smiles/icon_201.gif border=0>
I don't 'do' paranoid.
All's fair in love and war  | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 9:14:16 AM | Two things could apply here.....either they are a player...or met some one they wanted to share those roses with...or they recieved a very nice letter from some one and they sent the rose as a way of saying thank you for the nice letter, but I am not interested.......
But I do look to see if they have there roses...and I do err on the catious side...I don't want to be talking to someone who has already found someone...and I damn sure don't want to be talking to no PLAYA.........
Renee' | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 9:29:58 AM | a rose is still a rose... a SYMBOL.. an image our culture has deemed passion offered..the language of flowers.. an ancient method of communication ~bouquet of certain flowers spelled out a certain message to a lover... like..."meet me down at the garden gate tonight"...virtual or not.. like the box of chocolates.... its conceptual art... AN IMAGE
representing AN IDEA... just like the banana that i like to think is a dancing pickle..or the little guppy fish...
Anna  | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 9:52:17 AM | I'm going to send out all my roses right away, so that the nutjobs who think they mean something will leave me alone.
Thanks for the thread, OPie!
Cheers!
Vulf  | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 10:17:16 AM | I pay attention to it... especially if it's close to the first of the month... when they get renewed! lol Most of the time when they've used their roses, their emails are full of compliments and... ummm.... desperation.... so it's easy to think that they've said the very same things to the ones they sent the roses to. If it's just a normal email I don't think anything of it.
Now, if I was communicating with someone and it seemed to be heading in a good direction... phone calls... talking of meeting etc., and I noticed he'd sent a rose... yeah... I'd feel a little crushed. I have a hard time focusing on more than one 'interest' at a time, and though I know not everybody is like that, it would definitely make me 'take a step back'.
I wish they accumulated like the points... then if you got a DOZEN roses you'd really feel special  | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 10:18:27 AM |
Roses are for friends that are down. Now potential dates...nah....they get the wine, beer and choclate....get 'em all liquored up and relaxed....
And the mystery of getting lots of gifts of Wine but No Roses is solved...geeesh!
OP: I don't see this as being a 'Flag'...of any colours. But somehow, I do agree with another poster, the Roses should be hidden just like the other virtual gifts are. | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 10:22:28 AM | | yes I would email them, life too short to sweat the silly small stuff. Its not like we have a dozen roses to start with,lol. | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 10:27:33 AM | Oh Im so glad someone else does that
I never e-mal them any way and if they e-mail me and have no roses, then nope, I dont get back to them..
yes sad I know but true | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 10:34:36 AM | If a guy messages me, I tend to check his profile out first. And let me tell you...if I see any roses missing...I will not reply LOL..I just feel like, someone was good enough to receive that rose and I was not LOL....just my thing I guess..  | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 11:15:05 AM | If a guy messages me, I tend to check his profile out first. And let me tell you...if I see any roses missing...I will not reply LOL..I just feel like, someone was good enough to receive that rose and I was not LOL....just my thing I guess Don't you see the irony here? The guy is damned if he has the rose--he ain't using them--or damned if doesn't have it--women ignore his e-mail assuming he is smitten with someone else. That's why they are useless. Most e-mail guys send is unanswered (80% or more). The guy sends the rose, it's likely being sent to a woman putting it into the proverbial trash bucket. The women who respond favorably to the rose would have most likely corresponded and/or met the guy anyways.
The lack of roses probably means more for women. I'd think some women send them out to put on the appearances of not being available to cut down on unwanted e-mails, or to put on the aire of looking like she is more popular than she really is. C'mon that's a joke--when Brad Pitt sends the e-mail, suddenly she becomes available to Mr. Pitt and answers the e-mail. | |
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tdh46
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Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 47 | |
| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 11:24:16 AM | | "Oh my its just a stupid rose......Whats all the fuss about" Simple yet direct answer to a rather silly question. clears it up rather nicely i think. | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 11:28:53 AM |
I've come across a few profiles where women state right in their profile..."if you've given out any or all of your roses don't bother contacting me". If ever I came across a profile like that I would be tempted to say I have 2 roses for you, now bend over coz I'm gonna shove 'em right up your a**  | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 11:37:53 AM | OMG.....can't believe this is a topic of conversation.
Thank God for the likes of Skyliner - I couldn't agree more.  | |
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| 0 roses... Would you email them?
Posted: 6/25/2007 11:42:38 AM |
If ever I came across a profile like that I would be tempted to say I have 2 roses for you, now bend over coz I'm gonna shove 'em right up your a**
LOL
Atta boy. | |
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