| Women needing to be save online versus women with traditional values.
Posted: 7/15/2007 12:14:40 AM | Seriously, I think that both sides, women and men, have certain concerns when they meet a new person online. For women it may be safety. For us men it is a) to know that the woman is more or less like she says she is (not just looks but personality too) and b) to actually know she is a WOMAN (seen too many movies to the contrary)!
Since the OP wants solutions, I think that online audio and audiovisual communications is a good way to get to know someone enough to make a first meeting a) comfortable and b) meaningful. Alas, many people shy away from A/V media/communications, some fearing a "flasher", some because they are too "lazy" (?) to have or get a microphone and a webcam.
Audio and A/V communications are IMO part of the essence of online "pre-dating" and they are useful for both sides, IMO since women do not have to supply tel. numbers or pay for calls and you can tell much more about a person from Audio or A/V contacts. Enough to make both sides willing to meaningfully meet IRL, be they 75 or 7500 miles apart.
3 cents | |
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tdh46
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Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 227 | |
| Women needing to be save online versus women with traditional values.
Posted: 7/15/2007 7:39:19 AM | | I think another good idea would be if the guy gave the lady his phone number. She uses *67 and block her number when she calls. That way everybody is happy, She feels protected and the guy feels like things are moving along and his time is not being wasted by a person that has no intention of ever coming from behind her computer. | |
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| Women needing to be save online versus women with traditional values.
Posted: 7/15/2007 8:50:42 AM | We must be kind of unique critters in this area. I've met a small number in the last 2 weeks to go with the few I met back in the winter and all of them brought me tea and met me in places that most folks say not to meet...lol. Darkly lit parks at 11 pm; nature trails a bit off the beaten track where they can walk with my doggie.
Funny though, my dog loves just about everyone she meets, but really only took a bit of a shine to one of the gals...and she really took to her. I thought my dog was leaving the beach with her last weekend as she walked with her almost to her car...lol
Most of them we didn't bother with the phone thing until moments before rendezvousing our meets where they asked what I want in my coffee or tea. Two I met at a nice pool hall/lounge at the south end of town.
I wonder a bit about the safety precautions these ladies took prior to meeting with me. A number of them though in fairness were given links to my websites and directed to some local advertising outlets that I appear on.
maybe i have a trusting face...lol...muhahaha | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games?
Posted: 7/15/2007 10:24:43 AM | Although I understand the humour behind your post AIXIAIXIA I would tend to think you really don't understand how vulnerable women feel.
Not my idea of someone who is capable of exhibiting empathy .
When we are introduced to men though someone we know or meet them in our work places, we are more likey to have a better and more honest idea of that persons character and past than internet dating provides.
I have been recently speaking by phone and messaging daily a man from this site whom I thought was a straight shooting nice guy and according to his profile looking for friends ,which to me meant no pressure.
Well when he ask me to travel to meet him and I declined as I had other things to do and I wasn't feeling well he signed off angry. He came back to me today and finding out that I decided to go out last night after I found out what was making me ill, as if I owed him some explanation he became Very Very abusive and scared the S--it out of me .
Now I am left here in my home to worry about this man coming to my house because he has my phone # he can easily get my address .
Not a good feeling.
Kinda like a sitting duck in my own home .
Physically he is a lot bigger than I am so we as women have to think about these things. | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games?
Posted: 7/15/2007 11:44:30 AM | Want Telephone Security? Here you go folks --- Magic Jack -- A way to make cheaper than dirt cheap phone calls over the Internet if you are using a Broadband ISP service or even if you are at Starbucks using their WiFi service. This works similar to Skype - if you have ever heard of that service - but no sofware - just plug and go.
With this device you can make calls WITHOUT your home phone, office phone or cell phone.
No software - just a little cell phone sized device you plug into your laptop or home computer via the USB port.
http://www.magicjack.com/site/BlogLinks.html
(Note: I make no money from this - this is not a commercial ploy -- a friend has one and he says it works great.) I just thought you folks would like to know...
Just plug the little device into you computer via a USB port. Then plug in any regular touch tone phone. This is a Dirt Cheap phone service over the period of a year.
It works very much like a regular home 'land line' phone.
A phone call -IN OR OUT -- CANNOT be Traced to You - by a regular person. You can call and be called with a VERY HIGH LEVEL OF SECURITY. That is if you wish to conceal your real phone number (it is never involved with this device). Of course you also conceal your Name and Address - as it also is NOT INVOLVED with this service.
This phone works over the Broadband Internet via Voice Over Internet Protocol - VoIP
I personally use another type of VoIP phone service called SunRocket.com - very Similar.
**************
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* Skype and Cable Phone services look out for magicJack! | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games?
Posted: 7/15/2007 12:01:09 PM | Alls I can say is e-mail who you are interested in....if you feel she is any of the ones you mentioned stop e-0mailing her.....simple...hey we all have our reasons..maybe the women just don't see you and her as a good fit and she is not interested in you........maybe check your ego out...Life's too short to complain...get out there and date the one's that contact you FIRST..then you know they are really interested....try that...good luck....B SAFE! | |
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| Women needing to be safe online versus women with traditional values.
Posted: 7/20/2007 2:33:32 PM | Funny how the topic is about women stringing men on with no intentions of meeting, spouting safety issues as the reason, and yet when a woman that DOES get out and meet asks about one safety concern she gets laughed at for being too cautious and told that she should get back behind the screen.... yep.... funny
Good point .
You are obviously one of the women who actually gets out there and meets ....this thread does not apply to you .
You should be as cautious as you feel necessary to be comfortable.....but you should meet people in real life when on a dating site .
Crazy idea hey? ....real actual dating from a dating site .
on topic .....
I have chatted with quite a few women and I often ask how many actual real life dates they have gone on while on this site......
I was surprised of how many have never met anyone or one or maybe two and they have been on here a long time ....six months , year or two or more.
I always say ....if you don't meet that's ok , but you should just click on talk/email....that way guys know what's what.
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games?
Posted: 7/20/2007 6:08:53 PM | | MEN ARE MASTERS AT DOING THAT !I GET SICK OF THE BLAME BEING PUT ON WOMEN .IT IS BOTH SEXES DOING IT AND I SAY IT HAPPENS TO BE THE PERSON NOT JUST ONE SEX OR OTHER.I AM TIRED OF THE LIES AND FREAKING GAMES!AND THE MARRIED ONES GET THE F OFF THE INTERNET SITES > IF U WANT SOMEBODY ELSE GET DIVORCED AN D UNATTACHED! | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games?
Posted: 7/20/2007 7:54:01 PM |
MEN ARE MASTERS AT DOING THAT !I GET SICK OF THE BLAME BEING PUT ON WOMEN .IT IS BOTH SEXES DOING IT AND I SAY IT HAPPENS TO BE THE PERSON NOT JUST ONE SEX OR OTHER.I AM TIRED OF THE LIES AND FREAKING GAMES!AND THE MARRIED ONES GET THE F OFF THE INTERNET SITES > IF U WANT SOMEBODY ELSE GET DIVORCED AN D UNATTACHED!-sassy2butterfly2 Is it me, or is this chick out in left field chasing inbred possums? | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/20/2007 8:37:19 PM |
I have endless stories about inappropriateness in the work world. Endless stories in general.
Brushing against me at the fax machine, telling me to wear a lower shirt and higher skirt to close the deal.
I don't dress provocatively. typically you'll find me in some outdoor gear. Frequently i dress down and "dog out" as i put it, just so that i won't be pawed at. I'll wear a stocking cap and my glasses
Likewise. For every positive smile, I get 5 that want to assault me verbally or physically. I dress down these days. I've been attacked physically 3 times in 5 years and verbally assaulted more times than I can count by women and men.
I hope you can support women who seek to protect themselves and educate those around you so that women can feel safe within society. Talk pointedly to men that you know are disrespectful. Don't enable bad behavior. You want women to feel safer, its up to all of us to contribute to that within society.
After an attempted rape outside of my house, where I fought back and took two punches to the head but landed three while on my back, the police asked me if what they saw me wearing was what I was wearing when the predator assaulted me. Uh... ok...
Jeans, baseball cap, sweatshirt...
NO... I ran up and changed out of my bikini after screaming my head off, nose and lips bleeding and then ran back down to the curb (and all within the 90 seconds it took them to respond), just to present a better victim.... *insert sarcasm*
If someone doesn't respect my boundries, fine.
Next. | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/20/2007 9:08:43 PM | ^
Wow , you have had a rough go of it ....that's certainly not right !...maybe it has to do with where you work or where you live ? There must be some explanation .
I am sure that is a very uncommon amount of trouble . I cannot believe most women have experienced that amount ....the women I know certainly haven't .
I agree that you should be extra super cautious just by the amount of trouble you have experienced.
Did any of that occur as a result of internet dating ?
cedar.... if you asked me I'd say "how's the weekend of august 4th sound??
It's a date ....my security people will be in touch with your security people . (-;
And then a very real possibility is maybe after all this synopsis and analysis of the "safety issue" line - is that they are using it to blow you off
I don't think that is the case ....If they were just blowing guys off , they wouldn't be mailing back long mails , looking for more mail and more "virtual " .
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/20/2007 9:21:47 PM | After an attempted rape outside of my house, where I fought back and took two punches to the head but landed three while on my back, the police asked me if what they saw me wearing was what I was wearing when the predator assaulted me. Uh... ok...
Jeans, baseball cap, sweatshirt...
NO... I ran up and changed out of my bikini after screaming my head off, nose and lips bleeding and then ran back down to the curb (and all within the 90 seconds it took them to respond), just to present a better victim.... *insert sarcasm*
You were in shock, and you misunderstood. Understandable. No cop in his or her right mind in this day and age would ask that question for ANY reason other than to get the clothing the victim was wearing at the time to get physical evidence (either DNA if it proceeded to a rape or blood or rips/tears if it was a sexual assault). They'd be crucified in court, as would any defence lawyer using that.
If you don't want to believe that, it's your right. But that's a fact. If in fact the cop/cops you ran into were retrograde renogades, they should have been called to the carpet.
That's unacceptable to every law-enforcement agency in this country. | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/20/2007 9:57:21 PM |
You were in shock, and you misunderstood. Understandable.
I did not misunderstand a thing. From screams to response was less than 3 minutes. They did not even swab the blood all over the deck to determine which belonged to whom.
I'm no dummy, Dawn. Shock or not. They thought I did something to ask for it and made it very clear. | |
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tdh46
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Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 246 | |
| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/21/2007 7:20:05 AM | "likewise, for every positive smile,I get 5 that want to assault me verbally or physically. I dress down these days, i've been attacked physically 3 times in 5 years and verbally assaulted more times than i can count by women and men"
Tha truly is a very long list of problems in a short period of time. Most women go through an entire lifetime and not run into this much trouble. you are like a lightening rod for assholes.
I have to respectfully disagree with your choice to "dress down" , You should never have to change the way you dress because of bad people, and when you choose to do this i think in a small way the bad guys win, they have made you adjust you life to them.
A lot of people seem to have this rather asanine theory that a woman can be asking for trouble by the way she dresses. Women are not attacked or raped because of how they dress. Seeing a woman in a sexy dress does not turn a law abiding citizen into a rapist. And telling a woman that's a victim of a vicious crime that she may have been asking for it, is only making her a victim a second time. Can there be a more morally reprehensible thing to do than to make a woman who has been abused voilently think it's somehow her fault.
Women with genuine concerns about safety but are still willing to meet should take as much time as they need to feel confortable with the person they are meeting. Communication is key in these situations.
Where does one go to apply for the job of guarding Justcueits body?????
I bet the application line would be a couple of miles long. Some might even work for free. | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/21/2007 4:52:57 PM | I don't think that is the case ....If they were just blowing guys off , they wouldn't be mailing back long mails , looking for more mail and more "virtual "
I meant blowing you off in regards to actually physically meeting as was part of the original question. They most likely would be happy to keep cyber chatting / romance going for years... | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/22/2007 11:52:18 PM |
I get the ones that want to move in after MEETING for two hours.... or the ones with no teeth... wait... I meant one TOOTH.... one huge ass rotten tooth.... or the ones that ram their tongues down your throat on the first (and only) kiss and then when you pull away (with a resounding "POP") say "I know... good eh?" (as you're wiping his spit off your face).... or the ones... well... you get the picture.... those are the kind I get... yep
 WOW this sounds aweful familiar, I don't know where you are located but it sounds like we may have dated the same men | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/24/2007 8:27:20 AM | Unique, or LJKPRINCESS, while reading this I thought it was from a guy. I have had the same stuff with women, except they had teeth, with the kissing too. It's like very few people actually know how to kiss.
Cold tongue and I'll bet they were breathing while they did it making it even worse.
To make things go beyond worse they ask or try to kiss again and then after you fend them off they don't like simple suggestions.
Who wants a tongue working like a needle on a sewing machine going in and out over and over all cold and like you say full of spit? It's like getting Wet Willies! Not good.
In the thread about the worse food ever eaten I was sharing my past about powdered milk and this wet willie style of kissing is right up there with that. YUCK.
Nice soft lips, both kissers, closed throats with thoughts of warmth, meeting and melting together just going slow and nice. Touching faces, shoulders, hair... yeah, that feels right.
Eddie | |
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| WTF is up with women using being safeonline as an excuse to play games ?
Posted: 7/26/2007 2:44:26 AM | Well Eddie, I was LJKPRINCESS but after reading these forums I felt the need to change my user name because I have learned that some men lable us as high-maintenance if we use the names princess, queen and so on. I decided to pick a name that describes what I truely am ~UNIQUE~, I am a one of a kind! Also would like to say that I was not responding so much to the kissing as to the "meeting me for 2 hours" and wanting me to move in with him. What is up with that? No teeth part was honest though. I just thought that maybe this other woman may have dated the same guy. Thought it was funny because she was describing my situation. Just had to add to this thread. | |
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