| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 6:20:24 AM | Hey ExplosiveSheep, your post made me laugh If you were to have sex with my mom, my sisters, cousins and aunts.......it would for sure have to be at a family reunion.
Are you sure your not ExplodedInSheep......
Good one! | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 7:19:09 AM | Explosive, if you had done my family tree I wouldn't even need to ask you... they'd tell me prior to.. lmao...
You're young... your experience is premature...
The girl code it thus... I don't wanna sleep with a guy who's dated my friends... I'd know before dating you.... as far as anything else? Unless I want to "have" a sexual discussion beyond STD's... then it's entirely up to me... and don't be offended if I pass.. if it sounds like a drill then I'd say the guy has some insecurities or vice versa for a woman... if he asked what my wildest encounter was, names being withheld I might respond.... | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 8:10:12 AM |
Personally, right now I dont care...but when I get to the stage of life where marriage is a option, id like to know.
This just makes no sense to me. So, you get to the point of wanting to marry someone, then want to know the dirt? Then what? You don't want to marry her? Wouldn't you be a little too involved at that point for it to matter? I'm blown away by this statement. This is why people get hurt. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 8:15:54 AM | I think theres a big difference between thinking you have a right to a persons sexual back catalogue just because you want to know because of some insecurity thing and wanting to know because you think they might be a sex pest and have been in trouble with the law, if you thought that about a person why would you even be dating, it depends on your reason for wanting to know, if a girl told she had been with two guys at once would you think she an easy slut and then judge her on that because that would be unfair, if you want to know a bit of background on a potential new partner why is it allways the sex they've had or the people they've slept with that matters.
As for the guy saying sleeping with someones whole family would be in the past, how can you not differentiate that from having slept with random people your partner would'nt know or maybe they do know, i slept with one of my friends wife before he knew her, i never mentioned it and i dont to this day even though there now divorced know if she ever told him, what would it achieve her telling him she'd slept with one of his mates, nothing except the possibilty of him getting mad at me.
I suggest the people that dont get the whole question and replies to this topic go and watch a film by Kevin Smith called Chasing Amy, its pretty much based around this whole thing of dragging up the past among other things. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 8:19:23 AM | | I think that means for one night stands or flings, it doesn't matter. At least, that's what it sounds like. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 8:53:31 AM | This just makes no sense to me. So, you get to the point of wanting to marry someone, then want to know the dirt? Then what? You don't want to marry her? Wouldn't you be a little too involved at that point for it to matter? I'm blown away by this statement. This is why people get hurt.
I think if you read the posting properly he said "stage in life where marriage is an option"... He didn't say "stage in a relationship"....
This is because for a lot of men, they don't care where you've been or what you've done or with who or with how many... because they don't plan to settle down with YOU!
In other words, they're with you for a good time, not a long time...
if a girl told she had been with two guys at once would you think she an easy slut and then judge her on that because that would be unfair
Ok... so what would sleeping with two guys at once make her? She's certainly easy...
think theres a big difference between thinking you have a right to a persons sexual back catalogue just because you want to know because of some insecurity thing and wanting to know because you think they might be a sex pest and have been in trouble with the law
Or you might want to know in case she's got issues, STD's, or can't commit....
i slept with one of my friends wife before he knew her, i never mentioned it and i dont to this day even though there now divorced know if she ever told him, what would it achieve her telling him she'd slept with one of his mates, nothing except the possibilty of him getting mad at me.
Ever wonder why they're now divorced...? Maybe she already told him....
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 8:54:56 AM |
if you want to know a bit of background on a potential new partner why is it allways the sex they've had or the people they've slept with that matters
The back ground of a potential partner is not just knowing his or her sexual past,, but that is what this topic is about...
There many things about a partner that I would want to know,, not just her sexual past, I wouldn't judge her past,, but I would have decided if we had similar values, for example I'm not going to date a hooker,, nor am I going to a date mental case, nor will I date someone who didn't have their s*th together,,
But frankly I could care less about her past unless she F*cked the football team at 40 yrs old,, or she is turning tricks at a local bar......... | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 8:59:50 AM |
I think if you read the posting properly he said "stage in life where marriage is an option"... He didn't say "stage in a relationship"....
I read it properly, thanks for your concern.
BUT, this is a perfect example of men being from Mars and women from Venus.
******Scratching head saying "Wow" right now*************** | |
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Sefra
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Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 409 | |
| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 9:31:11 AM | Before jumping into the sack with ANYONE... what would be smart is for both to get an STD panel done....
Who and what happened in the past is IN THE PAST... what is important is what has remained in the body...
It is impetuous to simply jump into the sack without taking all precautions. NO sex is worth dying for....or even worse.... contracting ugly warts that will NEVER go away.
So..yeah..be curious about your new partner's past... and then make sure that his/her past has remained there...by visiting a doctor's office together.
Now that's romance!
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 1:42:56 PM |
I think theres a big difference between thinking you have a right to a persons sexual back catalogue just because you want to know because of some insecurity thing and wanting to know because you think they might be a sex pest and have been in trouble with the law,
I have the right to ask anything I want to ask for any reason. She has the right to not answer for any reason. What I do after that is up to me.
I suggest the people that dont get the whole question and replies to this topic go and watch a film by Kevin Smith called Chasing Amy, its pretty much based around this whole thing of dragging up the past among other things.
Somehow, I think I'd rather not use a movie script as the basis of a relationship. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 2:26:21 PM | | Its best to leave the past in the past...and just be happy with her knowledge. I don't even mind a girl say "I learned this sex trick from a friend"...instead of saying my past bf and I use to do this. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 5:39:10 PM | | Man....this is a touchy subject, I like to follow the Clinton policy on a lot of these issues: Don't Ask, Don't Tell. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 5:59:58 PM | | Sexual history is that...history. If you can take and pass all the medical tests to show you are clean....it doesn't matter to me. My sexual history is my business and is in the past. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 6:15:43 PM |
Somehow, I think I'd rather not use a movie script as the basis of a relationship.
Somehow, I can see me wanting to use that line over and over again.... | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 6:53:25 PM |
Ignorance is bliss! I wouldnt want to know and besides, a lady never tells!
I with diamondgirl on this one. Don't ask don't tell. BTW gentlemen don't tell either. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 10:18:43 PM | | Absolutely! If you dont ask, you dont deserve to know, & if you do ask then you should be told the truth, & not the vague 'I dont remember', or 'It's not important' or 'lets not talk about it right now' truth. This of course goes for both men & women. I think if you ask and are told the truth, then you dont have any right to complain in the future. If you are lied to then they are not worth keeping. If you (man or woman) are not 100% open & honest about all of it, then when you get dumped 5 years later when he or she finds out that you banged 2 or 3 guys or girls in 1 night, it was your own fault for trying to hide something that could very seriously affect your potential relationship. If you think about it, you are only protecting yourself by being honest. I have nothing to hide & would want to know, or the relationship would end effective immediately, for my own protection. All of this of course is providing that you 'want' to know, if you care. If not, then its not an issue. I relate it to the practice of "even trade" and the 'fair measure' ethics that are used everyday when you buy something like food or drugs or anything that a person is about to accept into their body. You have the 'right to know' just like we want from the FDA or food manufacturers, basically "tell me whats in it" by putting the ingredients and fair warning labels on the package BEFORE I buy it. And dont be dissapointed when they potential customer walks away. Would you tell your son or daughter, "It doesnt matter, just sleep with whoever you want, you dont need to know what could kill you by doing it."? Or have them just readily agree to take whatever drug someone offers them, with the only clause of 'none of your business whats in it, just swallow it'. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 10:55:31 PM | Personally I like to know his sexual history because it will determine (for me) if I even want to date him or not. If he’s had countless of women before me... then I really don’t want to be added to the list of many. So yes it is important to me.
I see nothing wrong with sharing my sexual past information with him and visa versa. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 10:59:55 PM | | There's a reason why most adult women I know tell me (unsolicited) they've been withn 4-7 men in their lives. They're all full of it. Whatever number they tell you, just square it. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 11:16:16 PM |
There's a reason why most adult women I know tell me (unsolicited) they've been withn 4-7 men in their lives. They're all full of it. Whatever number they tell you, just square it.
This could be from the type of women you are meeting. I don't care if anyone knows my sexual history..............I know who and how many people I have been with. I don't have any problem telling anyone that asks........but it becomes pretty clear with the nasty comments that women lie about the number anyway that it isn't really going to matter if I tell the truth or not........So, why even ask if you are going to make nasty comments about it being a lie and such? If any man ever doubted my answer.........he would never have to worry about my history again. Those who usually doubt the truth from others are usually the biggest liars in my experience.
Kind of like those who cheat...........are usually some of the first to accuse others because they think if they are cheating others must cheat as well. JMO | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/8/2009 11:23:32 PM |
This could be from the type of women you are meeting. I don't care if anyone knows my sexual history..............I know who and how many people I have been with. I don't have any problem telling anyone that asks........but it becomes pretty clear with the nasty comments that women lie about the number anyway that it isn't really going to matter if I tell the truth or not........So, why even ask if you are going to make nasty comments about it being a lie and such? If any man ever doubted my answer.........he would never have to worry about my history again. Those who usually doubt the truth from others are usually the biggest liars in my experience.
Kind of like those who cheat...........are usually some of the first to accuse others because they think if they are cheating others must cheat as well. JMO
Do you understand what unsolicited means? I wrote that down the first time to indicate that I don't ask for the information, it's just given to me. Always with her asking me how many I've been with. I always answer something stupid like, googleplex.
As for the type of woman? I meet women everywhere. The gym, church (when I went), the store...anywhere. All types, all backgrounds. Yet this unifying thing they all have in common. And I know it's not just me since every guy I know jokes about the female deductions. And guess what? They all hear the same 4-7 range.
And to question my honesty? Based on what? Observing and listening to other male observations about women and noticing we all have the same notes in this regard? Please, explain how that makes me a liar. I'd like a good laugh. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/9/2009 12:18:42 AM | Yes, but be prepared to answer her questions about your sexual past as well. If you can't be honest with each other, about your sexual histories, then how can you be honest about anything else with each other? However, if you don't really want to know how many men she's been with, then don't ask.
However, no matter how many men she's been with, that has nothing to do with you. I find it funny how men freak out if we've had what they consider "too many", but if they've been complete whore-dogs all their lives, we're supposed to be ok with it. I just LOVE the double standards of dating. *rolls eyes*
It doesn't matter, how many men she was with before you, because she's not with them anymore. Clearly, they weren't as wonderful as you are, because she's with you now, not them. You, are who she'll be coming home to every night. But there's nothing wrong with being open about each others' sexual histories, IF you can handle it the answer. If you don't think you can, don't ask. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/9/2009 12:32:06 AM |
Do you understand what unsolicited means? I wrote that down the first time to indicate that I don't ask for the information, it's just given to me. Always with her asking me how many I've been with. I always answer something stupid like, googleplex.
As for the type of woman? I meet women everywhere. The gym, church (when I went), the store...anywhere. All types, all backgrounds. Yet this unifying thing they all have in common. And I know it's not just me since every guy I know jokes about the female deductions. And guess what? They all hear the same 4-7 range.
And to question my honesty? Based on what? Observing and listening to other male observations about women and noticing we all have the same notes in this regard? Please, explain how that makes me a liar. I'd like a good laugh.
First off..........I didn't say you were a liar...........
I said those who doubt are usually............if you took offense to it maybe that is you.......but I didn't call you a liar.
Yes, I know what unsolicited means............I would surely wonder about a woman that comes right out and tells a man her sexual history right out of the blue. Could be those that are trying to tell you a number so quick are some that are insecure about themselves or ashamed of how many partners........who knows.
I guess I don't compare notes with my friends about how many sexual partners the men I am with has...........but maybe men do. This could be the reason that women find it none of a man's business how many sexual partners she has. JMO
Not saying my thinking is right...........but it is my opinion. | |
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| Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 2/9/2009 5:01:32 AM |
There's a reason why most adult women I know tell me (unsolicited) they've been withn 4-7 men in their lives. They're all full of it. Whatever number they tell you, just square it.
One woman I know said, "I don't count the one-night-stands and the mistakes!"... | |
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