| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/14/2008 1:54:45 PM | I tend to be on the side of science on this, and don't necessarily believe in a 'soul-mate'. I'd like to, but the more I learn about 'love' and 'dating', I'm siding with the more logical.
Personally, I think that mate selection is down to individual experiance and social influence. Either you click with someone because your past experiances, personality traits and criteria for a sexual mate, match....or you don't because they don't!
What you're talking about is not the soul-mate theory- it's attachment.
When you said about
It could be your best freind, your uncle, your son, your daughter....I'm not a twisted f**k but when you feel that special bond with someone what does it mean? you are clearly talking about social attachment, which is completely different from someone being a 'soul-mate'~ everyone has different highly emotional attachments at different points in their life. If you're a parent, you have strong bonds with your kids~ it doesn't mean they are your 'soul mate'~ it just means you love 'em. When you feel a special bond with someone, then its down to a mixture of things: how long you've known them, similarity, sexual attraction, shared experiances~ why are you trying to over analyse it?
A soul is neither male or female so can it be anyone?
Where's you're supporting evidence that your soul is neither male or female? ;o) Joke~
But seriously, how do you know it doesn't have a gender? I'd say mine is female...and if Rene Descartes is to be believed, then the soul only exists because of the mind...and my mind is definitely looking for a male counterpart. | |
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alain3
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Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 52 | |
| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/14/2008 2:30:21 PM | The definition of soulmate varies across the spectrum of people:
I personally don't believe in the mystical fate version of the definition of a soulmate that says there's a one & only perfect match in this world... (pure rubbish)
I believe there's potential groups of people that are compatible with one another like what MBTI & Four Temperaments personality tests attempt to do. A soulmate by this definition is simply a person who easier & more enjoyable to live with than the others... | |
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shyava
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Joined: 10/13/2008
Msg: 53 | |
| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/17/2008 4:00:49 PM | | I see 'soulmates' as your one true love. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/24/2008 11:19:44 AM | Don't believe in them and just don't understand people
that say they have met their "soulmate".
Feel it's more a of chemical reaction attraction
thing.
Movies tend to over do it with the "soulmate" thing.
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/24/2008 12:10:06 PM | Dee, just by you saying that in that way, I think you are my soulmate.  | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/24/2008 12:10:19 PM | Well, I have used the word 'soulmate' before - in my profile where people have read it and seen fit to write me telling me that I am full of $H!T....
Why is it people get so hot and bothered by the word 'soulmate'?
I was married for 12 years. We knew each other incrediblly well. So well, in fact, that we could finish one anothers thoughts and sentences. When I use the word 'soulmate' - this is what I refer to. When you have this kind of a connection and are in a relationship with someone - it tends to take it all to another level.
If something was bothering her - I could read it in her face. If someone said/did something that bothered me - she knew exactly how I felt without need for discussion. We just knew.
So to with interacting with one another - you know the things they love, what makes them happy. You are able to do things for them that makes it all that much better.
So - in my definition of 'soulmate' - yes - I do believe you can have them.
Too, I believe it doesn't take anything really extraodinary. You need two people that genuinely care about one another, that want to learn about one another, that value the other and their feelings and the time to do this.
We didn't try or set out for this to happen. It just became that way. I can't explain it and not likely she would be able to either. But it was very real and very wonderful.
Now, if you think that 'soulmate' is one person in the entire world that is your counterpart. No, I think that is not realistic. I think that people are far more versatile than that. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/24/2008 1:26:16 PM |
Don't believe in them and just don't understand people
that say they have met their "soulmate".
Feel it's more a of chemical reaction attraction
thing.
Movies tend to over do it with the "soulmate" thing.
I used to be exactly of the same mind as you on the topic of soulmates. I even thought love was over dramatized. And I had been in plenty of relationships, both short term and long term.
Then at 34, she came into my life...
"A soul mate is someone to whom we feel profoundly connected, as though the communication and communing that take place between us were not the product of intentional efforts, but rather a divine grace. This kind of relationship is so important to the soul that many have said there is nothing more precious in life."
And that is exactly what happened.
Once you experience that, you understand where all the soulmate stuff comes from.
My thoughts now on soulmates? I think there can be a number of people out there in the world who are uniquely suited to you, and all your particular idiosyncrasies ,and vice versa. Someone you mesh exceptionally well with on many, many levels, and conflict on few if any levels with.
The name that would best describe those types of people uniquely suited to you would be a soulmate, and yes, there are more than one. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/24/2008 2:52:45 PM |
OK. Now these are just some thoughts. All my life I've been a dreamer, you know finding that special someone to complete you, finding that "can't live without each other love". I know it's out there and when you know, you know right? I mean my parents have been together for 41 years. Three days after my dad met my mom he told her her was going to marry her, he would die for her and I can see it in their eyes everyday. He found his soulmate, his "True Companion".
I guess what I've been wondering is who believes in soulmates? If you believe then think about this... a soulmate can be anyone. A soul is neither male or female so can it be anyone? It could be your best freind, your uncle, your son, your daughter....I'm not a twisted f**k but when you feel that special bond with someone what does it mean? Then again maybe you can have more than one soulmate of coarse than again maybe I just think to much.
Anyways I'm just curious on other peoples thoughts on this so...
OP -- just like with religion, there are so many varied degrees of belief or disbelief in the term and condition of "soulmates" that exist. Some will believe with all their being that they exist, some will kinda believe based off of personal experiences they may have had or have seen through friends, and others just disbelieve altogether.
Personally, I do believe in "soulmates". It may be a biased or jaded perspective to be sure, since I follow that belief with examples in my own life, but nevertheless, I do believe in them. I believe very strongly that no one just "happens" into your life, as you walk this Earth living it. Each and every person you meet has a reason and purpose to be there. Like that tossed around snippet called "Reason, Season or a Lifetime". To me, no one just happens to be in your life, they were meant to be there in some capacity.
Where soulmates are concerned, these are the ones that seem perpetual. The long haul types...the ones that have been there through thick and thin, for the longest time, and they're still there...also the ones that you have bounced back and forth with for years over years and somehow, through sometimes interesting circumstances, they always seem to gravitate back towards you eventually. In my life, for the past 35 years, I've had the luxury of interacting with more than a few soulmates, both male and female.
My closest ally, whom I consider more a brother than a friend, has been in my life for 22+ years now. We despised each other when we first met, but that didn't last long. We've been practically inseparable ever since. Even when I walked away from him for a couple years, he gravitated back into my world under the oddest circumstances.
My ex fiancé was another example. We met under awkward circumstances, and immediately became enthralled with one another. No one expected us to be a couple, EVER, but we hit it off like gangbusters. We often knew what the other was thinking like we were tuned into the same frequency, we'd often finish each other's sentences or thoughts, and had a way of communicating without ever opening our mouths. Two peas in a pod we were for 6 years.
My current SO and I knew each other 15 years ago and had feelings almost instantly, but due to poor conditions and circumstance, we weren't able to explore them further. We fought like cat and dog for more than a year before we said that we'd never speak to or see each other again. 10 years later, through circumstance again, we reconnected after all that time as we gravitated back towards each other. Nothing, it seemed, could keep us apart for good.
All 3 I view as soulmates. There have been others that are no longer in my life, and some that still are to a lesser degree. Of those that are still here, we reconnected in weird ways. Of the ones that aren't here, who knows...they may be back some day, and who's to say that won't happen if I've seen it happen a few times already?
Everything happens for a reason, and no one just "happens" into your life without meaning and purpose to be there. This is what I believe, and what allows me to believe in the existence of "soulmates" in general.
I can't imagine what my life woulda been like if they hadn't influenced it their own way, or if they weren't here to continue to influence it today.
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/24/2008 3:37:42 PM | Concurred in entirety, flippie. Well said!
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 5:28:37 AM | There 'verity'.... EXACTLY.
So I am not alone in this. I did not think it possible that I was the 'one' person in the entire world that felt this.
Certainly too, people that DO NOT like the word or believe in such are far more vocal about it than those that are/do.
Again, I really do not understand - why is the word 'soulmate' such a target for people to vent about negatively???
I know of no other word that draws that kind of reaction from people. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 5:35:38 AM | Honestly, I didnt believe in this until I experienced it. I have found one person in my life who just has a connection I cant explain. Life took us down different roads and we are 3000 miles apart with mountains of reasons we cannot be together, but we can go years without talking and she will call me out of the blue the day something huge happens in my life and always seems to know when I need her. How else does one explain this?
The problem is, I dont know if we all ever find people like this, or can find a way to be with those people. I can see waiting to find that connection. some people never find it and it's not the only way to be happy. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 12:33:25 PM | Everything in this world is frequency.
I think that this "soulmates" thing is a matter of having a harmonious frequency.
There are always people you meet, of both sexes, that you like instantly., and communication is great.
I have always felt that I would know him when I saw him.
I haven't seen him yet, but I always check out anything that looks like it could be potential -- just in case.
I like that idea of instant attraction - it saves one from all the anxiety.
And then there are those who are instant irritations and you have to be careful to be polite to them. Communication here is awkward and they seem offensive or offended.
Then there are the neutral frequency people....Communication with them is sort of like a dead phone line. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 3:52:21 PM | | my thought on soul mates is you don't find your true soul mate until you die hense- SOUL mate that is just my opinion though... | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 4:17:25 PM | I guess to believe in soulmates I would first have to believe in souls.
That said, I think it's possible for two people to complement each other well, to bring out the best in each other, to really be partners in life.
I haven't experienced it, but I've seen it, and it's lovely. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 5:13:25 PM | I think you're really talking about the twin flame. Twin flames are also soul mates. There can be many soul mates in one's lifetime but only one twin flame. This is the person you were deemed to be with by God from the beginning of time. I believe everyone has a twin flame.
I thought I had met mine but was a soul mate. You can have soul mates, friends, family members.
Twin flames connect without words, they are telepathic and have that special spiritual connection.
There's a lot written up on websites about this.
Good luck to all finding yours.
Cheryl. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 7:27:10 PM | I don't think your parents are neccesarily soulmates - I think they were meant to be together...I think that there is someone out there that we are destined to be with in this lifetime and when you meet them, you know it quickly. That is why I hate this whole dating nightmare - when you meet the right person, it just clicks. There is no sense in forcing the pieces together, you know?
I do believe that people have soulmates, but you are right, they could be anyone in your life or they may not even be here in this lifetime with us.  | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 7:30:22 PM | | I agree with you completely - well said. I have a friend who came to work with me last year and we just clicked instantly - like we had known each other forever. It is a very strange feeling and it doesn't happen that often...somehow I am sure she and I have always been good friends. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 8:16:54 PM | Well, I thought the whole thing about soulmates, is that there is one. So why do people say there is more than one/ I don't get it.
I was with a guy that we connected to the point when I would go to phone him, the phone would ring and it was him. I wouldn't talk to him for a while and pick up he phone to call and he was there on the line before I dialed out. Or something would happen at the same time and I would call and it was happening to him, I had dreams and phoned him and it already happened the day before. But that doesn't mean it works as luck would have it - we were worlds apart and never could make it work!
Family, friends, pride, always got in the way, so whatever you have with someone - you need to work at it daily, love does not come easy. And the hardest thing is to know you can't have the one you want because you didn't try hard enough. | |
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SkyB15
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Joined: 11/13/2008
Msg: 69 | |
| Soulmates...
Posted: 11/25/2008 8:36:31 PM | | I think there is a possibility of a soul mate but a person has to be exactly what they want to be & living the life they want & truly be themselves. before they can find that person. How can you find your soul mate when you dont know who you are until a person is certian of that it would be difficult. I think a person can have a intense attraction to someone but there has to be more than that to make it last & to be happy with that person. thats why a person has to be astablished and happy in there life first so they know what to look for and can look past the initial attraction. or rather have refined what they are attracted too. I think a soul mate is out there but you have to live your life the way you want to first & know what to look for. people do change when they are together and both are suposed to give to one another, so I'd say if you found someone you can be youself with & they maken you very happy & feel good and you do the same for them then you have found your soul make. It all depends on how perfect you want it to be. keep looking untill you find what you want but be happy with yourself first. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 12/5/2008 4:05:59 PM | | aint that the truth! | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 12/5/2008 7:48:02 PM | Yes I believe because I have met her,we were together for years and only my foolish behavior pushed us apart. That was 14 years ago and I can still see her and hear her laugh.
But only as memories.
I have not laid eyes on her or heard her voice since 1995 | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 12/5/2008 7:53:50 PM | I don't believe in them. I suppose it's because I've never felt that anyone ever 'completed' me or knew me better than myself or finished my sentences for me. That would be scary. Who wants to play Mad Libs for all eternity?
I think we connect with many different people over the course of our lives some lovers some not. But never yoked to any one person. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 12/5/2008 8:09:20 PM | | No I don't believe in soul mates its an allusion. Over half americans are divorced n the ones still married god only knows how many of them cheat. Sorry if soulmates exist, its only maybe 1 or 2 percent who have one. And I think that is called, mutual love and respect for one another. Our society is looking for the next best newer bite. | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 12/5/2008 9:03:14 PM | I. like other posters believe we have soulmates - and not just one. It can be the friends that connects or that we are drawn t o- and understand and empathize with eah other - without words. I have two such friends - and they are a treasure.
Equa;;y I believe one has more than one soulmate romantically - I have had two - and it was phenomeneol while it lasted. Why does it not last - we are not ready - or we have a different part of our journey/lesson to learn.
Just my belief in trying to make sense as a tiny grain of sand in the abyss.
Z | |
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| Soulmates...
Posted: 12/5/2008 10:06:49 PM | | Soulmates = addict + coaddict | |
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