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| | Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!Page 10 of 15 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15) |
when i draw a conclusion based on your actual words .
The irony in that comment is just beyond words. You must have difficulty with reading comprehension. Apparently, you read actual words which were never written. Perhaps you should read my comments before you post.
I'll say this for the second time, I never stated she was a golddigger in any of my comments, nor did I say she was with him for the money. Would you kindly find a post where I said any of that???
I'll say it for the third time....try reading it this time.....I BELIEVE she had the ring appraised for other than insurance purposes, probably because she didn't trust him based on his past dishonesty.
why do you believe the worst of her
Again, I said it was likely because of his past lies, this is believing neither the worst, nor the best.
You should focus your anger on the 1,000 guys who actually did say she was golddigger. | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/23/2007 8:56:11 PM | I've read a few comments that are bashing the bride-to-be and the people who saw the ring and didn't know it was a fake by looking at it. I have a coworker who has an enormous baguette diamond ring. I know it's real, but it looks like it came out of a cracker jack box. I think that all diamonds that size look terrible just because they are too large and overdone. It doesn't surprise me at all that people believed the lie.
Plus, when your spouse-to-be tells you something, don't you accept it as truth? If you don't believe or can't trust your partners words, then the relationships is in some serious trouble. I certainly want to marry someone I can admire and respect and put on a bit of a pedestal.
As to the bride's actions--maybe she felt that the groom was too busy to come to the insurer with her--maybe he told her he was too busy in the hopes that she would just drop that issue. There are a whole slough of maybes and what ifs.
I think there are a few reasons he lied to her:
1. Maybe he felt she would only be with him if he impressed her with wealth and luxury.--> he should find someone less interested in material issues
2. Maybe he just wanted her to have something really nice but couldn't afford it.--they should discuss priorities and, maybe, work things out
3. Maybe he is just a compulsive liar.--sounds like this is the winner since you say he has "embellished" before--even not considering the trust issues this causes, don't you think you'd get a little irritated after a while by having to sift through everything he says and listen to the contradictions? I think braggarts are a big pain in the ass--run run run | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/23/2007 9:05:36 PM | | I also don't understand why people think a lawyer has to be wealthy. We have a doctor(a top-earning profession as well) in Saskatoon who lost his home because he forfeited his payments. Elton John makes more money than Midas, and I believe he declared bankruptcy. Lots of people who make big money spend it even faster. Also, lawyers and doctors have to go to University for a significant period of time, so often start out with a large debtload . | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/23/2007 10:07:40 PM | It is quite obvious the guy is a liar and a showoff. There are alot of people who pretend to be something they are not including the woman that showed off this so-called 30,000 dollar ring.
I personally think they are of the same kind in showiness, (is that a word) lol. Most working professionals can purchase such a ring but choose not to do so. Why.
I find people with real wealth (CASH) never show their wealth where as posers buy the Faux Rolex, leased Porsche and Faux 30,000 glass rings.
They are a perfect fit. They should marry at once. Just my opinion. | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/23/2007 11:42:10 PM |
The irony in that comment is just beyond words. You must have difficulty with reading comprehension. Apparently, you read actual words which were never written. Perhaps you should read my comments before you post.
I'll say this for the second time, I never stated she was a golddigger in any of my comments, nor did I say she was with him for the money. Would you kindly find a post where I said any of that???
I'll say it for the third time....try reading it this time.....I BELIEVE she had the ring appraised for other than insurance purposes, probably because she didn't trust him based on his past dishonesty.
well, arent we a mite smarmy? I read your comments. You are a hypocrite. You pass judgement on her with no reason backing your judgement. THAT is what I judged you on but of course you think YOU are the onlyone allowed to pass judgement without it being judgemental. I dont give a flying F what you believe. The point is still that you have no basis for your belief other than wanting to blame the victim or your preconceptions about women. It is the norm for someone getting an expensive piece of jewelry to insure it which requires an appraisal. That is what any rational, halfway sophisticated person would do. It is logical to assume that this is what she did and it doesnt take any negative impression of her to do so. I frankly dont care if you believe in little green men or that the moon is made of green cheese. There is nothing in the original post to indicate those fantasies either. There is a reason that you choose to believe something for which there is no support rather than the mundane, everyday logical explanation. If it is not for the reasons I suppose, I dont care. It still invalidates your post because you are basing your opinion, pardon me, "belief" on a fantasy that doesnt not follow the facts we are given logically without whatever drives your leap of faith. And I assure you it takes more than some pissant to anger me. | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/24/2007 3:45:46 PM |
You pass judgement on her with no reason backing your judgement.
Once again, point out where I said she was a golddigger. Let's try it a 4th time: I said she did it because he lied in the past.
to blame the victim
Where are you getting these crazy conclusions from??? I said it was her fault??? That conclusion has absolutely nothing to do with anything I said.
dont care if you believe in little green men or that the moon is made of green cheese
Your arguments are as ridiculous and as nonsensical as you are.
And I assure you it takes more than some pissant to anger me.
Really???
Since we're talking about "judgement" [sic. British]. Seems to me you're pretty angry and a typical bully. While I accept your opinion, you don't even understand mine, and yet you proceed with aggression and weak intimidation to try to silence someone who has an opposing view.
Seems to me a man of 49 years should be a little more level-headed than resorting to calling people with whom they don't agree "pissants". | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/25/2007 7:51:40 PM | I understand the men's point that money should not be a big deal about the ring - I more agree with the ladies who seem to understand at a deeper level, that the offensive part of all this is the lie - not the value of the ring - If someone gave ME a 30,000 dollar ring, I sure as he** would get it appraised because I promise you that something of such value would be insured - people with money usually are at least that financially responsible. If he really loved her, and had enough confidence in the relationship, he should not have felt he had to lie about the value - If she really loved him, she would be thrilled with the gift - any relationship rooted in untruths is already rooted in no trust - run girl run !!!  | |
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hkwolf
| | Joined: 8/1/2006
Msg: 236 | |
| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/27/2007 12:37:47 AM | Some rhetorical questions and various answers:
For him -
Why did he feel the need to lie?
Positive - He couldn't afford a real ring and wanted to impress her
Negative - He's a lying scumbag and wanted to make a grand gesture to impress her without any effort
Realistic - He felt insecure; that the real ring he could afford wouldn't be good enough for her standards, so he embellished (again) with a fake large one
For her -
Why did she go to the appraiser?
Positive - She was doing it for the insurance
Negative - She's a gold digger and wanted to verify he sacrificed the right amount of months of salary
Realistic - Her girlfriends/relatives encouraged her to go after hearing the story and seeing it
Why was it *this* particular lie that was so important as opposed to all the exposed lies and potentially unexposed lies?
Positive - Because now they're getting married and honesty matters more, she was forigiving in the past
Negative - She's a gold digger and doesn't care about honesty related to other topics, but passionately cares about honesty related to money
Realistic - Because the engagement is no longer pure and innocent, it ruined the moment | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/27/2007 4:13:43 PM | | All this fury over a ring, a stupid peice of jewlry. I guess I don't get it. Where did he lie , she picked the ring out of his collecion. No one gives an engagement ring and then tells them the worth, unless they want it back. She didn't trust him so she had it appraised. Chances are one of her so called friends noticed the fake ring. There are women who can spot an expensive pair of Italian shoes in a dark crowed bar, knows exactly where your suit came from and gee can spot a fake diamond. Just a thought.... | |
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echo*
| | Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 238 | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/28/2007 5:06:03 PM | First of all I think dishonesty in a relationship is never good!
If it were me in your friends position,I would talk to the guy and let him know that I was aware of the lie (which is the main issue,not that the diamond isn't real) and I would discuss with him if the lying is something that is in his character or if it was something he did to show her how much he really loved her, but was out of his financial reach to buy her a genuine diamond.
The size of a diamond is important to some women....It represents social status and possible love to some women. Personally I feel for these types of females because they are missing the real meaning what love is all about!
There is no right or wrong answer,Only opinions and thoughts from different peoples' points of view.......I will leave you with mine and hopefully you get something from what I said! Sincerely,Tammy/Racenut17 | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 7/28/2007 8:47:22 PM | Hello all! Yes, very interesting replies generated from this post, thank you all for taking the time to read and put in your 2 cents. Very funny how people jump to conclusions, and make the perpretrator the poor victim, while my horribly mistreated and deceived friend is some materialistic gold-digger...I guess this strikes a nerve with some folks...ha ha ha
Allow me to clarify:
1) No, she didn't want a big A$$ rock or ring, she prefers delicate, understated, not flashy or ridiculously expensive stuff...she tried on the ring, remarked how beautiful it was, and he INSISTED that she keep it. She was afraid to wear the thing, let alone have it in her possession....he BRAGGED how much it cost (she didn't ask).
The whole unfortunate incident was her fault for liking the ring in the first place....(according to him)
He claimed he had no paperwork on it, hence no appraisal, NO INSURANCE...She got it appraised to include in her homeowners insurance, not to sell or check the authenticity of it, she (like all of us) believed him. Why wouldn't we?
2) She loves HIM, not his stuff...
3) She can, and does, provide for herself very well, thank you.
4) I look out for and care about my friends...I ALWAYS have time for their problems.
Please feel free to email me for further clarification....
Peace Always, NAB  | |
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| Non sequitur
Posted: 7/29/2007 3:15:09 PM |
she (like all of us) believed him. Why wouldn't we?
Ah, so a lawyer (no less) makes a $30,000 purchase and has no paperwork for it? Nothing to guarantee the purchase, authenticity, clarity... No one finds that strange. | |
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| Non sequitur
Posted: 8/8/2007 10:54:06 PM | So Italiaguy do you have paperwork on all the valuable items in your home? Those antiques you inherited from your grandparents for example?
I kind of feel sorry for the lawyer who felt this woman would only want to marry him if he put that kind of money on her finger.
I was mortified when my ex started talking financing over a $12K emerald ring in a platinum setting we both admired one night. I would have preferred a used CAR to a piece of jewelery for that much money.
And just because a person has alphabet soup after their name doesn't mean they have any common sense!
My most prized possession right now is a topaz ring that a friend bought for me just because he could. The best gifts are the unexpected ones for no reason at all!
This guy may very well have spent his whole life lying about all kinds of things to make himself feel better. I'd want to know if she was the only person who got an earful of his lies or if he was full of b.s. with everybody!
Certainly an interesting thread. | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 8/9/2007 12:22:50 AM | Love doesn't even amount to a price!! Who cares that the ring wasn't $30,000.
If I loved someone and they gave me a $100.00 ring I would be okay with that..
It's the thought and the love behind it. A ring is only a symbol..meaning eternity..never ending(thats why it's a circle). If you ask me it sounds like she is a bit shallow and a gold digger who is too upset that the ring wasn't worth the big bucks!!
Who wants a relationship based on a dollar amount anyways??
Yes I agree he was wrong to lie..but did she confront him and ask why he did it? I believe maybe he was testing her to make sure she wasn't in it just for the money..however i do believe lawyers can be snakes, but still..who knows his real motives..maybe he was gonna do something romantic and the night before the wedding show up with the stone embedded into a ring or something else..etc..who knows!!
But she better really think about her life because if she's checking up on him and having the ring appraised really shows she doesn't trust him..and a marriage will NEVER work if there's no TRUST. So I'd advise her not to go through with it. | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 8/9/2007 5:23:44 AM | Your friend knows what kind of person he is. The question is not "what kind of person does such a thing?" It's "what kind of woman would stay with someone who would do such a thing?"
The value of the ring is not the issue here. The fact that he could tell her such a lie would worry me more. He sounds like a complete fraud, and this lie is probably the least of them.
What kind of person does this kind of thing? The kind who is allowed to get away with it. | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 8/9/2007 6:02:41 AM | I have absolutely NO doubt this guy is an oily, smooth-talking slimeball and gets 100% of the blame for lying about the ring. But in the larger relationship issue the woman is not totally innocent here.
In dysfunctional relationships there's ALWAYS blame to go around, even if it's just from inaction, stupidity, or gullibility.
Of course we don't know this couple from Adam, they're complete strangers, but the OP put the situation and some background info out for everybody to see and comment on, so don't jump on me if you don't like what I'm about to write.
It always amazes me how seemingly intelligent, grounded, down-to-earth women can be swept away and suckered in by smooth-talking con artists, and not just once, but over and over and over again. I'm absolutely sure this guy manifested his arrogant nature MANY times (as was told in the OP) before the ring episode but she kept taking him back, even willing to marry him? Why?....because of L-O-V-E??? Please. Maybe she told herself that at the start of the relationship, but he "demonstrated" he can't be trusted, yet she STILL believed the fantasy. I think I know the real reason; I've seen it many times before. It's because he's a slick narcissist with charm, money, and materialism (however fake), and probably wildly handsome (at least to her), but he's probably also supremely venal, shallow, and egotistical. I probably couldn't stand to be in the same room with him for five seconds, but evidently that's the kind of man she's apparently attracted to.
It's the same phenomenon of spoiled, beautiful, sexy women with little scruples that use their looks to manipulate men into being drooling, accommodating, sychophantic idiots. I HATE seeing it happen, no matter what gender.
Gawd, I hope she's come to her senses and won't take him back yet again, and STAYS AWAY from his type from now on. If not, I may change my mind and put ALL the blame on HER afterall!  | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 8/9/2007 10:39:13 PM | It's about a liar.
**what kind of a person, man or woman would lie about the value of such a huge ring?Would you give your best friend a "fake" watch that you pd. $30.00 for and either say it was $300.00 or lead him to believe you paid $300.00**this is a guy trying to scam his girl, her parents - his- all their friends! If she was in love with him and he was a decent guy, I am betting she would have said yes to a small pretty ring.
Ahhh, but had she not shot to the appraisers the lie wouldn't have been exposed! So... unless she says it was for insurance reasons, she doesn't have much ground to stand on with the trust issue.
*** Ahhh, I see you have not lately been given jewlery of over 8000.00- for home owners they always suggest that you call to update you policy for fine jewelry. At the jewelry store they give you documentation regarding the warranty, and to protect that much of an investment is smart business-------that has nothing to do with trust.
What would you say to a poster who asked, "I lost my 30,000 engagement ring, what should I do?
answer:Well you should have had it appraised and insured right when you received the gift.
There is no way in youknowwhere this is that womans fault-my god could you immagine receiving a breath taking ring, nervous, excited-telling all you friends----------and then worse having to tell everyon3 it was fake!!!! | |
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| Got a fake diamond ring from fiance, he lied and said it was a 3 carat, 30,000 dollar ring!
Posted: 8/9/2007 11:05:26 PM | I'd question big time this wedding relationship.
The guy knows there is something wrong with the ring and doesn't confront himself to tell her , "hey i know you would have liked a big ring , but i hope this is fine". Lies that keep the other person's ego in check aren't going to last long in a marriage relationship. Give it a few years and these little lies will get found out. This sort of thing sets a precedent on whats going to happen in a relationship.
When your entering into a marriage , if you really love the other person and hope for the same love , you'd expect the other person to accept you for who you are. If you can't buy a 30k ring , its just your not able to show the expression , lying about it to save your own hide is rather ego-istical as it says i'm important , you accept me as a this person.
Allowing your other half to be thoroughly embarrassed like that , i think is not mindful of your partner. Social friends are well off , some with big diamonds as well , you don't think that some friend isn't going to point out the bloody thing is a fake , a sham? Is it not foreseeable that a women will show off her ring. My friend's sister is engaged , diamond is small , a women shows this stuff off. Call it materialistic , but its what happens when girls get a ring, they show it for all its glory cause it means a great deal to them , perhaps the materialism , perhaps just to show their joy in being able to think they are marrying the man of their life.
Recap: communication issues, trust issues , ego issues , care issues.
Hopefully everything turned out alright. | |
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