| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/21/2007 7:54:46 PM |
my beautiful little girl left her signature by the way of stretch marks on my belly and chest. I am worried that it could be a deal breaker for the men I choose to become sexually active with. Ladies, any thoughts too?
I call my csection scar (and my gallbladder scars from laposcopy while preg) my "badges of honor". 
I admit I was timid the first time I was with a man after divorcing. However, no man has ever made a single comment about it. In fact, Ive gotten pretty good vibes if Ive ever given the impression of feeling uncomfortable.
If a man sees it as a dealbreaker, then obviously he isnt much of a catch..being that he would focus on the physical aspect of it. Men like confidence. Be confident with yourself and your body. Ive found that can be extremely sexy in a woman as well. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/21/2007 7:58:31 PM |
How is it some women look fantastic and have no stretch marks after babies? Just lucky genetics? I saw a pic of Denise Richards in a bikini and she looks amazing after 2 kids.
Of course! If most had $$$$$$$ for lipo, lifts, personal dietian chefs, and $$$$ for physical trainers-wed ALL have kick ass bod's. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 7:52:00 AM | Exactly.
These celebs are not just genetically blessed (some are), but they also have millions at their disposal to create this aura of perfection - their livelyhood is at stake when it comes to "physical perfection".
Between physical modification - plastic surgery, liposuction, chemical peels, and professionals - chefs, dieticians and trainers as well as airbrushing photos and specially set up photo shoots - of course they look perfect.
I love when they do "without the makeup" shots of these celebs - they look HUMAN. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 8:15:50 AM | | Simple answer is no, it doesn't turn me off as long as you still have curvy hips and a sparkle in your eye. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 8:31:26 AM | | I have been out with a single mum and stretch marks add to the enjoyment I t proves you are real | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 8:58:37 AM |
How is it some women look fantastic and have no stretch marks after babies? Just lucky genetics? I saw a pic of Denise Richards in a bikini and she looks amazing after 2 kids.
Stretch marks are caused by rapid gain weight. I gained an enormous amount of weight with my first pregnancy. I also wasn't watching what I was eating either.
After having children you can still get the flat tummy and be nice and tight if you work at it.
I was once sitting at a table with some lady friends at college. All of us were moms and all of them got into the conversation of having a difficult time losing the weight after having said children then looked at me. (because I am tiny) Yes, genetics do help. However, watch what you eat and get active. You want a nice tight body get yourself in the gym and start lifting those weights! Of course everyone suddenly had excuses for not making it to the gym. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 9:29:40 AM | | I play roller derby and our practices involve high endurance/cardio for 2 hours and plenty of crunches and pushups. I am back down to my original weight, but the deep scars and extra skin won't go away with diet and excercise. There is only so far it will take you. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 9:46:59 AM | | Depending how severe the "loose" skin is. You can fill it out with muscle mass. I doubt you have a severe loose skin where surgery would be needed. Add weights to your regimen. I see a lot women that don't add weights and it really is amazing the way your body changes and how much smaller and tighter you are when adding muscle mass. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 10:02:42 AM | Femme,
You are a woman, most girls dont reach that point of intamcey, wildness softness, and your orgasams are hot!!!!!! you ladies, pardon my crudness, cum, not some clear stuff but you get off which in turn gets most men off. You dont have a thing to worry about | |
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| I LOVE MAMA'S BODIES
Posted: 7/22/2007 10:07:30 AM | So you have a little less here, a little more there, this may have shifted, and you have a lil sexy sway back.
Everything about your post-child bearing body, I dig.
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 10:18:42 AM | | I cant see as men mind this, I have 2 children but fortunatly for me I never got ANY stretchmarks on my stomach or breasts, but when i look around to friends/family/neighbours etc there is always a man bringing up someone elses children these days so they must not mind the odd stretchmark! It's the person within that they are loving them for. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 10:21:44 AM | | Nope not at all. As you said if you are close enough in the relationship that it progressed that far, I think that would be an afterthought, if it received any thought at all. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 10:58:26 AM | Well, i too have the signature of a child: stretch marks on my stomach and breasts. Most men do not mind the marks. But if you happen to come across one who you think will mind, this little trick comes in handy. Wear a provocative outfit to bed (i.e.- sexy nightgown, teddy or something to that effect). Men are visual creatures- they are turned on by what they see. Blow his mind with what you are wearing and doing and soon your body issues won't be an issue. It works everytime. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 11:02:39 AM | femmephotog
Subject: single mom body issues
Message: I have a question for men out there who have been with single moms...does the fact that our bodies have been changed forever by having a child turn you off? I am newly dating again and my beautiful little girl left her signature by the way of stretch marks on my belly and chest. I am worried that it could be a deal breaker for the men I choose to become sexually active with. Ladies, any thoughts too?
Hya
If a man is really into you that won't be an issue at all.... just be confident in who you are huni, the pics on your profile are lovely and your right your little girl is gorgeous.... | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 1:04:16 PM | | the last time I had the privelege of being a motherf#cker :), the lady in question tried to hide her stomach, which drew attention to something I otherwise ignored so I could look at the big picture. So, to join the chorus of other posters...don't make a big deal about it. After a certain age, most guys are going to date single moms anyway, so its time to forget the flat belly and enjoy the whole package...tho frankly, I think at that age most guys are concerned less about looks and more about personality--its not just a cliche. You get older, you realize any woman can be a bimbo, they aren't rare. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 1:23:43 PM | I find it does not bother me at all, you have to understand that this is what happens sometimes when a woman goes through pregnancy and gives the miracle of life. For a man to not be accepting of this (because mostly it should be what is inside that counts) would be foolish and simple minded. Not that I have any sort of fetish for this or anything  , but I would think in my mind that this would be a sign of a nurturing and healthy, real woman.
*sounds really sexy when you think of it that way *
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/22/2007 1:27:59 PM |
Depending how severe the "loose" skin is. You can fill it out with muscle mass. I doubt you have a severe loose skin where surgery would be needed. Add weights to your regimen. I see a lot women that don't add weights and it really is amazing the way your body changes and how much smaller and tighter you are when adding muscle mass.
Winter Sparkle, I think in a lot of cases, you're right. Most people can go and work out, and bounce back into shape eventually. But, in my case (and I certainly know I'm not the only one in this boat!), the dr. said the only way to get rid of my loose skin, is to get a tummy tuck. After having 3 babies in 3 years, and never giving my body a chance to recover, all of that "loose skin" isn't attached to my abdomen wall anymore.
Granted, I'm not about to go run out and get surgery. I'm going to improve my body as much as I can, and get to the weight I want to be at - and then should I suddenly win the lottery, maybe I'll get a tummy tuck someday. But, not everyone can tighten back up after having babies. Some of us are destined to have more than just stretch marks as battle scars! Of course, I think there are a lot of women, who just don't bother trying, and that's why they can't get their previous body back. But others of us - there is just no chance in h*ll that we'll even come close to what we used to look like! | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/23/2007 11:04:50 AM | | femme if all your worried about is stretch marks thats not much of a worry. i have lost weight and have the extra sitting around my belly but i have no problem with the guy im with--i dont even think of the stretch marks as a flaw your looks and personality is what should be attracting men to you whats underneath shouldnt , if it does then those guys are pretty shallow to be turned off by minor flaws -- youll have no problem dont worry about it -- i just dont think about it people have said im sexy even though i dont think so but hey if their happy why worry | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/23/2007 11:27:26 AM | | none of those childbirth related things bother me in the least. I want a woman for who she is completely, stretch marks and all! | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/23/2007 11:31:32 AM | I have read most of the posts, and am happy to hear that most men dont care about them. Way to go GUYS....
And all of the postive comments about post child bearing bodies  !!!!!!
Then why is it that there are so many men, who realize that even after 1 pregnancy, nothing returns (rarely returns) to the same shape......
But so many on POF seem to want slender / thin / fit (as they call it).
Just wondering.......... D | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/23/2007 11:36:12 AM | | not all men want slender/slim/fit, etc. I personally prefer a non-skinny minny, but the reason guys do who knows..its just "in" and has been for a century or so. Why do a lot of women prefer "athletic" and TALL men? A thousand other threads about this! Personally I know that even after 1 child a woman is not going to have the same muscle tone, shape, etc. So what? If that is what is really important to the guy, then he is not the one for her, and she doesnt need a guy like that anyway! | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/23/2007 11:50:08 AM | Girl you look great. Don't let that worry you! We men don't have perfect bodies either!
And hey - if it bothers you too much, there's always the ol' tummy tuck. I bought my first wife one - but got kinda surprised when she came back with a man made belly button! lol | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/23/2007 2:21:13 PM | | ive seen moms with perfect bodies, and oned with hideously bad stretchmarks. they can be a turn off at that level, sorry. just keep em covered. | |
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/23/2007 2:40:41 PM | Interesting topic -- When I started dating I wondered how I would react to stretch marks and scars from childbirth because my ex recovered from two children with zero defects. I am happy to say that it didn't affect me in any way. I suppose it might bother some of the younger guys, but for the seasoned man I doubt it would really be an issue as long as they are truley interested in YOU.
Cheers!
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| single mom body issues
Posted: 7/23/2007 2:47:49 PM | | women are far harder on ourselves and each other than men are. | |
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