| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/9/2008 4:46:34 PM | well its not that you should avoid messaging them , maybe more there not exactly your type or going to be interested . find girls like this are sort of on a different level and mentality on life in general . they sort of have an idea where there life is headed and it does not involve a blue collar husband .
there likely to be tough to get to as well if there on a high up in the sense finacial level . they likely have high standards in men and income to match there positon in life . | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/11/2008 10:05:47 AM | [Go for it. You won't know if your blue collar job matters until you try. If she's not interested in you because you don't make enough $$$ then you're better off without the gold digger anyway. The mistake you're making here is that you're over thinking the process. Just talk to her, and if she is superficial then move on. She's just another fish. If she thinks she is too good for you, then she isn't good enough for you. Simple ]
Awesome advice!  
Can anybody tell me how you quote another post with the grey box on it?
Thanks | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/11/2008 11:34:32 AM | It's about compatibility, not job title. I've dated blue collar guys who were blue collar by choice and had previously been white collar professionals. They made decent money in their new careers, still had the class that came with the professional lifestyles they had lived before, and yet were now happy with their lives. It can be the best of both worlds.
Especially if you are talking about sending someone a message online, I think it is worth an effort if everything else in your profiles suggests you are actually compatible. Regardless of your jobs, if you like fishing and camping, but not art fairs and symphony concerts, and she is the other way around, then you really aren't compatible, so why message her? But if you do share interests then just the title of your job probably won't turn most women off.
This is the great thing about the online venue. Approaching her on the street would be a different thing, because it's intrusive and because she can't read your profile and see that you like the symphony and art fairs. If you're dressed for blue collar work, she is probably going to assume you're more the beer than wine type, if you get my drift. Online dating has some advantages when you are "against type." | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/16/2008 8:46:58 AM | I wouldn't message professional women if I were you. As a professional woman, I wouldn't go out with a blue collar guy. I did once just because I thought maybe there might not be any differences. Well, there were. Maybe in your case, you like to read and all that, but I found this guy to be very boring and misinformed about current affairs and didn't have any interest in travelling, the finer things in life, etc.
Not that I'm trying to bash non-professional men, but I feel like we just move in different circles. I know that everyone doesn't get the same opportunities in life and thus why we all have different things we do for a living and I'm all egalitarian and all that but I find it very difficult to connect with an uneducated man.
As some guy said in a different thread, I've established myself in a certain way and am well educated, ambitious, take care of myself physically and feel that we both should bring something to the table. I would want someone who is a professional so that we can relate on multiple levels. | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/16/2008 12:38:45 PM | OP:
I am a woman with a very successful career in a very male-dominated industry. I only date blue-collar types. Not because I have a "rule" about it, just because that's what I'm attracted to. I work with corporate types all day and I get my fill, trust me. I have no desire to date anyone like that.
I would not hesistate to message anyone and see if you have anything to talk about! | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/16/2008 1:02:24 PM | | Don't ever assume. There are a mix of postings here, some professional women don't care what a man does, some do. You won't know until you try. For over nine months I was chatting (emailing and phoning) with someone I liked a lot and would have been very happy to meet. Every now and again he would make some comment about my job or what I was doing or where I was or the fact that I could afford to do things he couldn't. We never met because no matter what I said he made his mind up for both of us that I wouldn't be interested in someone who earned less than me and did a manual job. We're not in touch anymore and I miss talking to him. If you like the look of someone and have things in common give it a try - if the worst that can happen is a read/delete what have yo got to lose? | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/16/2008 1:37:37 PM | OP I think the answer to your question is definitely not. Even if they say career driven etc... who knows? You might be the one who can change their mind, and you never know until you try. It doesn't really cost you more than a few minutes time!
Moreover, I've dated lots of professional women who wanted nothing more than to leave their professional lives in their office, and do low key stuff in their time off.
I say go for it, and never mind what you "should" do. Do what you want, see what happens :-)
Noor | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 5:34:21 AM | i've been mulling over the economic background issue as of late myself when it comes to dating someone.
legit online dating sites allow us to be exposed to people in other levels of income that we wouldnt normally encounter in our everyday life. think of it as you work days and someone works nights. the schedules clash so much that it makes dating a very hard thing to do. the effect is the same on economic backgrounds. if you're middle income, you cant expect to walk into the upper-income side of town and expect the people living there to want to date you. they are used to a certain expectation out of their "money- lifestyle" and the people who share this same money lifestyle. its like dating outside your league..how long before it breaks your mind/heart/and wallet with all the nuances that are part of economic backgrounds. be realistic in who you date and the expectations you have from them. better to be poor and in love/loved than rich and tolerated | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 6:42:08 AM | I'm one of those professional women and can speak from experience. For several years, I bought into the "it doesn't matter what either of us does for a living or our salaries; the most important thing is that we love each other and share common interests." It's been my expereince that I need all of the above, not just the latter.
The reality is that I like to travel and do other activities that cost money. I don't need anyone to pay my way; sharing expenses would be fine. So do I deny myself from doing these things because the guy can't afford it? Or do I become the sugar mama? (been there, done that enough -- not going there anymore)
I've learned that the financial incompatibility will be staring us in the face pretty darn quickly. Pretending that it doesn't matter for either party is temporary because the guilt and resentment that each feels will reach a point where there's no getting around it.
P.S. Need to comment on post #35: I came from a blue collar family. No privileges there. My folks didn't need to try to pay for my education. Through hard work and intelligence, I earned various scholarships that allowed me to attend USC. | |
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pr0x
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Joined: 1/26/2008
Msg: 62 | |
| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 6:47:16 AM | | I don't see what the problem is really. My first wife made way more money that I did. If you care about that kind of thing I could see how it would be an issue, but on the other hand respect it. I work as an Information Security Specialist. It is not the most blue collar job out there, but it certainly not white collar. I would message a woman who made more money than me regardless of the amount based on her personal character and interests. There is no reason why money should mean anything unless you are a gold digger or a guy with an inferiority complex. | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 7:19:08 AM | It could be a million different scenarios. Depends on the people. I`ve have dated everyone from a roofer, and floor installer to a surgeon and the CEO of a big corporation. And these were all for extended periods. When I look back, I remember charming and attractive things about each. The funny things, is my fondest memrories is how we spent time together when just "hanging out"--which were the best times, not on what he had or what he did at work. It was about what we did together.
For instance - the flooring guy- blow drying his gorgeous mid back length blonde hair and listening to Nine Inch Nails Albums
The surgeon- Him showing me his "guts" referenece books and cooking ethnic food with him.
The CEO- Getting into intense and stimulating conversations about human behavior, then going to Costco for shopping in mass quantity.
The roofer-------ummmmmm---strip scrabble
See, this is the stuff outside of work that makes life full. But then again, I`m an artist and tend to be different anyways.
Every woman will look at this differently too. No pattern. | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 7:58:07 AM | There is a saying that men may marry down but women never should. You need to think beyond financial and educational standards. Making money is actually easy. Keeping it is the hard part. Some of the poorest people that I know are doctors and lawyers. As far as education, you don't need a PHD to give a hug.
Take your job title off your profile. Women who are successful at their profession, do so by being very focused. They are more than just a "fancy title". They have a particular drive that embraces success. You have imagination but do you have the drive to match theirs? Their attitude when they look at your profile will be where is the iconic comics character that you have created. A man may accept a woman with less drive but a woman will drive over a man with less. | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 8:18:34 AM | Nah, "Message em anyhow"...Why not?...Maybe a few need a reality check anyhow, "We guys need it once in a while"...Internet sites are a bit odd that way, "If you tell people you make great money, have a great home and lots of little trinkets, "They think your lying anyhow"...Advertising how much money a person makes doesnt make a rip to anyone...
Besides, "Theres no difference between a woman that makes great money and those that do not"...I like the girl next door, anyhow... | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 10:20:15 AM | Back when I was driving OTR, I made frequent trips into NYC. As it happened, I eventually met and began dating a woman who made much more than I (legal secretary).
Money was never really an issue, because neither of us really had the time (or the desire) for formal, stuffy, expensive activities; it usually meant a walk around the block, a quick lunch together at a deli, sometimes renting a video and ordering in Chinese at her place; but she did mention that I was far more generous than the tightwad doctors and lawyers she had been accustomed to seeing.
She did insist on paying her share.
Now, if she had been the kind who enjoyed frequent trips to Europe, long cruises, expensive meals at fancy restaurants, we wouldn't have lasted a week.
Probably wouldn't have met if we had been using this kind of forum, because in all things measurable, we shouldn't have compatible. | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 10:23:36 AM | | OP, forget the money and learn to be a man and **** well. Very often, men who end up going for the money are too meek to be real men with women. They live in a world of bureaucracy and political correctness which is a euphemism for being afraid to get punched in the kisser. So be a man and **** them - they will flock to you. | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 4:39:28 PM | What difference does it make who makes more money? Why should a guy make more money in a relationship than the female?
It's one thing to make a decent living regardless what type of job your doing. But its another when the female expects a certain income otherwise she won't be interested. Digging much? | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 4:51:03 PM | | I think it all hinges on whether she would be the type of woman whose career impinges on living life. Some people are wedded to their career first and expect partners with similar values (i.e. 60 to 80 work week). Make your decision based on the person's values and not their income. You really cannot have a relationship unless you have something to talk about. | |
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| Should I Avoid Messaging Professional Women/Women That Make More Money Than I?
Posted: 4/23/2008 5:09:32 PM | There are certainly a lot of men who lack formal education but are enormously intelligent and much more literate than I, but overall, I think that education level probably has alot more impact on compatability than income. Most likely, I would have more in common with a man my age with a masters or doctorate in some field than with a blue collar worker. Not because of income but because of common life events. Ideally, both members of a couple have at least approximately similar education AND similar amounts of disposable income. For example, 2 people could earn exactly the same amount but one has bills and expenses which use up 99% of his or her income and no money to spare for social events. The other person only spends 50 % of his or her income for expenses and is free to use the rest for travel, entertainment, or savings. As a couple, the person with the larger amount of "disposable" income will end up being the one to always pay for everything. That is not only unfair but will probably eventually lead to resentment. Despite this, I still believe education level has a bigger influence on compatibility. Small differences such as one person who went to college but did not graduate dating a person with a Bachelors would not matter but If one person has a doctorate you can be darn sure that the subject that their degree is in takes up a fairly big chunk of their life and if you have no understanding of that part of their life I don't see much of a future for a long term relationship. On the other hand, if your both just in it for sex, neither education nor income would matter.  | |
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