| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/17/2008 1:11:30 PM | | Id love to know how the OP is doing with her 60lbs in 3 months diet plan?? Its 6 months since her declaration....so hows it going? Whats happened with Shallow Hal? We posters look forward to hearing from you, when you get your head out of the sand lol. | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/17/2008 1:43:40 PM | Pfffttt....I guess you could cave to his demands and lose those unsightly pounds...then next your hair will be too dark and he'll want you to be a blonde...then maybe get contacts so you have pretty blue eyes....then next your breasts will be too small and you will need to go get them fixed.....after all with a man like that..how can you really please him..when would it ever end??? He's all about control...and you need to kick his stupid a$$ out on the street where a dirty dog belongs!!
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/18/2008 12:00:03 PM | It may be a god give its up tu you if you expepted or not but god love all. I m not a god belivever but I how he see it may way.
Life is not about weight , hight, income ,look or what ever it up to your talent | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/18/2008 12:18:27 PM | | I would love it if all men looked like David Beckham!!! They don't and I can live with it.I wouldn't sleep with someone and live with them,then tell them that they aren't good enough. | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/18/2008 12:20:37 PM | Yup, it sure is. Why? Weight issues smack of inner disciplinary issues. That comment will anger many but then again... this is a forum.
Failure to take care of ones self by succumbing to the urge to gorge is a sign of weakness. Debate it with the doctors or whoever; weight loss is one of the largest moneymakers in the Country. Listen darling, people don't want to loose weight, they want to look better, feel better etc...
When someone reaches the point of no longer caring how they look, or feel...it's their choice but know well that it eliminates those from your dating pool that do.
Greg | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/18/2008 12:36:24 PM | | This happened to me once a few years ago when I met a guy called Russel. I had gone along to a local singles group with a friend and had seen him sitting at the other end of the dinner table on a nite out. I thought he was way out of my league as he was at the dinner chatting up a tall leggy thin blond woman so didn't really pay attention to him but i knew i fancied him like mad. As it happens we actually met on a blind date through the singles column in the local paper and i pointed out to him that i had seen him before at this dinner. We got on really well, had stacks in common and i really fancied him. However after a couple of dates he said that i was great, i had bags of personality and he could see himeslf falling in love with me but there was one thing about me that bothered him. I expected him to comment about my clothes possibly as i loved to dress all in black, or possibly my very short spikey hair may have been a bit too much for him. When he said it was my weight i was gutted. I felt like i had been slapped in the face by a wet fish. We agreed to remain friends and see each other as such and he asked me to go on holiday with him. Spending 2 weeks alone with him was the holiday from hell. Worst holiday i have ever been on. He was selfish, arrogant, and generally not very nice. Even his own mother advised me against getting involved with him cos he was a habitual money borrower but never paid it back. In my case i guess i had a lucky escape. You will, like i did, meet someone who doesn't give a flying fig about your weight he will love you for you. You just need to keep believing and hold on. I wish you the best of luck. | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/18/2008 4:20:54 PM |
what if I do that, lose it, and something happens a few years down the line? I gain it all, or some of of it back... What then...
Oh yea, and just for the record.... I do look after myself, Don't get me wrong. I'm not out trying to break any records. I've had issues with weight flux my whole life - from tiny to now, and back again... LOL But I'll always be me!
some people can't seem to face the facts we all turn grey and wrinkle up. Far as being 30 pounds over that ain't crap. I dated big girls, and they all had big hearts. I was just too different from what they really wanted. I would date most of them again. Besides I can't say anything about weight, at one point I was 360 pounds and I stand close to 5'9", now I am currently at 225. My goal is 195 by end of the year, but enough about me. I have for the most part been about the personality. A positive attitude gets my attention all the time. I can't lie I do have some physical preference. Never loose weight for anyone, do it for yourself. | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/19/2008 12:11:58 AM | | I'd just like to say that while I'm not particularly overweight, I'm not skinny either, and I still find that the guys i'm attracted to aren't attracted to me... | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/19/2008 7:41:49 AM |
You are all right, and I thank you for taking the time. I do know this, and as I've said, I'm moving on and forward with my life, he still is and will always be one of my best friends. I do love him dearly.
 Seriously????!!! What low self-esteem you have, my dear! According to Webster's, "best" is defined as "Exceeding all others in excellence & quality" or "Most satisfactory, suitable, or useful, or desirable" - if this is how your best friend treats you, I'd sure hate to see what your enemies are like!! | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/19/2008 7:52:24 AM |
This isn't the first time this has happened with me
Then you are choosing the wrong men, OP. If you had everything in common with a man except the fact that he cheats, that wouldn't mean you should stay with him just because everything else matches up.
He's disrespecting you. And you sound to be the type who gravitates towards men who disrespect you. | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/19/2008 8:08:48 AM |
I'd just like to say that while I'm not particularly overweight, I'm not skinny either, and I still find that the guys i'm attracted to aren't attracted to me...
Those guys sound a little shallow rnjl because you are attractive. Sometimes the men that are rejecting you are really doing you a favor. | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/19/2008 8:36:17 AM | cantevenbreathe5
Is it really that big of an issue, when everything else matches?
I "think the question for you should be does everything really" match?
I suspect, once again, it is the inner saint in re-denial and dancing on the top of low self-esteem... telling yourself you won't find anyone else "wonderfully" better...
Get out here! Wake up girl!
If you feel for yourself that your weight might be a concern for health, ok, lose weight to feel healthy and better, but not for nobody else...
Creatively occupy yourself with better thoughts how to change your eating behavior to healthy meals "combinations" (the real secret in the pudding...) AND seek any healthy exercise activity, daily with consistence, be it hiking, swimming, bicycling, dancing, yoga, rowering, back horse riding...
Whatever, focus on something you really would like to do for a change, and, most importantly, move out of the place or find a new roommate.
Again, get off and away from this douchebag p*imp... he is not only taking you as granted to serve him, he is putting you down for a change... wtf?
Geez
Do it now!
Good luck! | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/19/2008 6:04:58 PM |
Those guys sound a little shallow rnjl because you are attractive. Sometimes the men that are rejecting you are really doing you a favor.
I don't know if there's enough information to really make that statement. She never gave a reason as to why the guys she's attracted to weren't attracted to here so it's a stretch to call them shallow. By the same token every women that liked you yet did not get that attention reciprocated could call you shallow.
Having a preference doesn't make one shallow. Usually the shallowness comes from the perception that the reason given is silly.
Weight issues are tough but he's also beholden to the same rules. What if he gained 100lbs...would the OP be ok with that? Maybe or maybe not. Where a man can really affect change though is in his support. You can't force someone to gain/lose weight for anyone but themselves. Love should be supportive though and the classy thing would have been to say
"Hun ..I'd like you to shed some weight and I'm willing to walk with you or change my diet to help you" That way the person feels supported even though the smack of being told they are too heavy has just be delivered. | |
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| How focused on image and weight are most men?
Posted: 6/19/2008 8:21:01 PM | not everything else matches if this weight thing is the "only" problem. If everything were on a perfect marraige minded living arrangement, you would be married my dear. Go find your own place and live your own life then when you are happy in your own skin true love will find you and love the skin you are in too! Don't take him back either when you move out and have lost a few pounds after you find your happiness-he missed the boat and hurt you. He does not deserve you and will do the same to you after you get comfortable again and put some more weight on again perhaps?
By the way, do not move in with a man and be the wife then the room mate and the handy lover when needed. He is not in love with you as you think you are with him. Don't settle ever! Find someone after you have found yourself and then you will see the difference. | |
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