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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/8/2008 11:10:08 AM |
If a girl of 16 is being pursued by a man of 25 im going to think there is something wrong with him to be honest, what does he want? someone more pliable?.
What if the girl was 14 and dated a 34 year old. After the breakup she was single for a bit and then dated a 27 year old when she was 16. They lasted 3 years and then when she was 19, she started dating a 35 year old. This isn't hypothetical. This is a real person.
In fact, her mother encourages it because she feels that at least an older guy would have his life sorted out and would be able to provide for her.
Why do we really care so much about how other people choose to lives their lives? Is it because of your dissatisfaction with your own life that you choose to try to meddle around with concern yourself with the lives of people you will never meet? | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/8/2008 2:47:15 PM | That Sam I am ....why do some of us care ? well some of us has daughters or in my case Goddaughters and our jobs when they are young is to protect them, and hopefully when they are old enough they can make decisions by them selves.
What if the girl was 14 and dated a 34 year old. After the breakup she was single for a bit and then dated a 27 year old when she was 16. They lasted 3 years and then when she was 19, she started dating a 35 year old. This isn't hypothetical. This is a real person.
In fact, her mother encourages it because she feels that at least an older guy would have his life sorted out and would be able to provide for her.-that sam i am If what you say is true, the mother should be ashamed of her self(what kind of sick b itch would let her 14 year old date a 34 year old?) good Lord I hope the guy she was involved with at 14 and him 34 wasn't a teacher? do you know how sick that sounds? even 27 and 16 is a problem, once she hits 19 , so what.... its her life.
If being protective of our children is meddling, im guilty as charged. Im sorry you couldn't convince me that its right to lets minors be with adults, not matter how mature the teen is, granted yes Ive seen mature 17 years old live on their own, no help from the folks but really those are far and few between, most 17 year olds are too busy living at home enjoying mommy cooking, cleaning, laundry , borrowing the car blah blah blah. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/8/2008 2:50:28 PM | | this isnt a problem for me because recently ive been on an older woman kick but when i was 22-23 years old i was all about the barely legal fresh out of highschool chicks, reason much the same as someone listed before, women my own age looked so old to me, how mant 23 year old women have i known who look like theyre 40? quite a lot so i wanted a taste of the young un-wrinkled tight perky wants to party world before it was too late. but now younger girls irritate me. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/8/2008 3:06:46 PM | 17 years is not a child, they are a young adult. i would think they should have been parented enough to be able to go out in the world and start making some of their own decisions. children make mistakes -and learn from them, -they will never really grow up until you step back and let them take their own steps through life.
being less than a year away from being a legal adult -do you think they are just hit with a lightning volt of intelligence as soon as they turn 18?
there are always going to be old creepy dudes trying to rob the cradle, you cant follow your children around and protect them from everything. just hope you have taught and bred enough common sense into them to stay away from bar fights, felons and hookers... | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/8/2008 3:11:13 PM | No, they aren't hit by a both of lightning when they turn 18-- but that doesn't make it any better.
Based on my experience teaching high school, I would say that many have NOT been parented enough to be able to go out and make responsible decisions.
Of course--- these are the ones that are most likely to be doing the behavior we're discussing.... | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/8/2008 3:16:28 PM | Sex really seems to be a case of "do as i say, not as i do."
Why are you all treating sex like such a bad thing? | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/8/2008 5:26:04 PM | that sam I am, nobody treating sex as it was a bad thing? HELLO
sex with a minor doesn't appeal to a lot of us, see the difference? | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/8/2008 10:34:43 PM |
and you say the mother encouraged this? where do you live? Pedo City?
Well, her mother didn't know about the 34 year old when she was 14. But she actually encouraged her with the 27 year old. Technically, Pedophiles go for pre-adolescents. 14 is quite a bit older. | |
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Kynnie
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Joined: 4/8/2007
Msg: 734 | |
| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/9/2008 3:29:20 AM |
Technically, Pedophiles go for pre-adolescents. 14 is quite a bit older.
If somene attempts to go by the strict definition...yes.
However pedophiles also blur the boundaries of age regardless of sexual development.
Pedophilia, is also particular in regards to men/women who continue to age and yet still lust (and attempt to lust) over people of the same bracket as they were in youth(even whilst assuming relations with people of their on chronological age)
Perpetrators often delude themselves into viewing their actions as helpful to children (considered minors by the law or not).
They often tell themselves (and anyone who cares to listen) they are contributing to a child's development
And THAT ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ is most often the bullshit you see written in threads & occuring in real life...debating whether or not it is legal for 40 yr old people to be chasing 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19 or 20 yr old people.
You are pedophiles whether you like it or not.
Whether the law will punish you accordingly is irrelevant...
Frankly...Im not interested in listening to people with mental illnesses justifying their behavior...
We're just lucky the age of consent isnt 5 years or we'd be listening to filth arguing for their rights to f*ck kids at that age too.
Oh Im well aware that filth is an exceptionally harsh term to use to describe these people who screw kids & not quite minors...and Im good with it...cos thats exactly what I think. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/9/2008 6:41:17 AM | | individuals attracted to adolescents are hebephiles, and those whose boundaries are more blurred, interested in children and adolescents are pedohebephiles. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/9/2008 10:05:47 AM | So Kynnie, if it is a mental illness, shouldn't we be concerned with helping and curing them instead of giving them a hard time. This is an illness, by your definition, kinda like schizophrenia or diabetes. Those who suggested violence - shame on you. Isn't that like beating up the homeless dude on the street?
Frankly, I don't see why so much ink (or the electronic equivalent) has been wasted meddling in the lives of other people. Sure if it is our kids, you have that choice. But if two people you don't know choose to date each other, what business is it of yours? | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/9/2008 10:30:36 AM | | Here in Tennessee, anyone that is 3 years older than a minor (under 18) is technically guilty of Statutory Rape. I know it can be tempting, but you are playing with fire and the girl or boy does not have to be the prosecutor, and really can't because they are minors, but whether the consenting minor wants to prosecute or not is not left to them, it's their parents decision and they can hang your butt! | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/9/2008 4:24:30 PM | A 40 year old chasing a 20 year old is a pedophile?
That would make every major male Hollywood actor over 40 a pedophile.
I think you should re-examine your statement.
- Christopher93 | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/9/2008 4:27:21 PM | "christopher something or whatever number. Ack, there are cheap shots left right and center. "
Well I certainly hope you don't think any of them were directed at you.
I think we're 99% in agreement on this topic.
- Christopher93 | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/9/2008 4:34:12 PM | Okay, here's a scenario for people to focus their judgmental side:
A female friend (25) is engaged to her fiance, who used to be her ringette coach (33).
They started dating when she was 21 and he was 29.
Why is this acceptable, but if she were 17 and he were 25 it wouldn't?
Why are we making this judgment based entirely on numbers? We don't know the people involved. Who are we to judge?
I know more than a few Christian girls who got married right out of high school or college, to slightly older men from their church, and years later they seem to still have very happy marriages.
Again, who are you or I to judge this?
Compared to the majority of the population, it looks like they have things figured out and the rest of us are the fools.
- Christopher93 | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/10/2008 12:03:14 PM | Because Christopher numbers when the person in question is a minor plays a major part
Nobody cares she is a adult at 21 and if she marries a 29 year old, it would be a question of so what and who cares and none of anyone business.
When someone is a minor YES, its a big deal to lot of people ( including me)
I know more than a few Christian girls who got married right out of high school or college, to slightly older men from their church, and years later they seem to still have very happy marriages.-christopher93 Ive said this before in another thread that We also tend to have a rather idyllic vision of how marriages used to go. The truth is that not everyone ended up blissfully happy after 50 years of marriage. There was a lot of misery swept under the rug because there were no other choices. The reality is that people grow and mature differently, and just because you were in sync 10 years ago, it doesn't mean you will still be today. It's no one's fault: life happens, experiences happen.
Times changed people changed, listen 50 y ears ago lots of immigrants came to this country at 17 years old and knew no one and had to carve out a life on their own, its not the same today most 17 years olds today have curfews and most parents wont even let them go on vacations with their friends with out a adult present. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/10/2008 12:22:05 PM |
Times changed people changed, listen 50 y ears ago lots of immigrants came to this country at 17 years old and knew no one and had to carve out a life on their own, its not the same today most 17 years olds today have curfews and most parents wont even let them go on vacations with their friends with out a adult present.
True enough, but we also have an idyllic view of what families are. It seems we forget that a lot of people aren't in nuclear, middle-class families with two caring parents.
I went to a very lower-class high school and many of my friends were legally-independent youths at age 16. They worked and lived on their own, some of them "kicked out" by their parents for really frivolous issues. Although "children" by the numbers, they were in fact functioning as responsible adults, showing up for work on time, paying the rent, making car loan and insurance payments, the works.
It's for situations like these where I think that an age of consent of 16 makes sense. These kids had a lot more in common with the average 19-21 year old making their first venture out into the world on their own, than they did their fellow 16-17 year old high school students still living at home with mom & dad.
In that case, I'd see no problem with a 17 year old, living as an independent adult, dating and having a relationship with someone in their early 20's.
A 17 year old, living at home with mom & dad, barring unusual maturity for their age, is still pretty much a child and having the same relationship with a 20-something would likely be inappropriate -- but it shouldn't be *illegal*.
An aspect of the age-of-consent laws that I haven't seen come up here is the reality that many girls lie about their age to gain access to older men. A lot of girls at my high school had fake ID's and would go to the bar for the sole purpose of "picking up college guys". Some were doing this as young as 14, posing as 18-year-olds.
The guys would sometimes even check the girl's ID, it would seem legit, and then she'd have a big story the next day about the "amazing frat party" she was at, or how she slept in a dorm room the previous night, and how college dorms are "so cool".
Again, like I said, really lower-class high school.
So with that situation in mind, I wouldn't support raising the age-of-consent because even though the young men involved in the sexual encounters checked the girls' ID's, angry fathers could still hire pit-bull lawyers to hunt them down and ruin the college-boys' lives with statutory rape charges they really don't deserve.
The moral argument comes up, "well they shouldn't be hooking up with random girls, anyway!" but although that is true, it's not something a person should be thrown in jail for. That is their own lifestyle choice and none of the government's business.
So in a roundabout way, the age of consent sitting at 14 helps to protect young men who may be duped by younger girls pretending to be older than they really are. From my jr. high and high school experiences, I suspect that this type of victimization happens more often than you'll see 25 year old men go trolling around for 14 year old girlfriends.
This post is really starting to lose its cohesion so I'll stop there.
-- Christopher93 | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/10/2008 5:58:56 PM | I recently read a post from a 25 year old man who has a crush on a minor, the girl in question is according to him is 17 years old. Personally I think this is unacceptable but some of the replies really shocked me. I have a 16 year old daughter and the thought of an adult male almost a decade older hitting on her troubles me as I feel at this age children are very venerable and should not be the target of 25 year old virgins (this claim was also made in the original post). Perhaps Im over protective so Id like to know what others think about what ages are acceptable for minors/17 year olds to have sex with adults from both male and females. If the genders were reversed would things be different? Whats you option on this? - akamrsmith
This is really a hard call, I dated guys this age when I was that age & it was never a problem.
It depends on a lot of factors. Personally, I am against the age of consent being raised again,
it was 16 when I was a teen & created an icredible amount of stress. I do not think most 16
year olds are "very vulnerable", but then again I don't think of teens as children, but as
inexperienced young adults. Perhaps you are just feeling over protective, it can be hard to see
our children becoming young adults & trying their wings. I think I would find it more troubling,
or at least confusing, if the guy were younger, because "they say", guys mature slower than
girls. Although I am not entirely sure I believe that, myself. I have long thought that guys just
use it as an excuse to get away with stuff they otherwise wouldn't. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/10/2008 6:07:42 PM | | Ok my sister is 15 nearly 16 and would find it gross and sick if a man over 22 wanted to be with her.....until she is 18 she is classed as a CHILD I've chatted to some men 30+ who are proud to have slept with 16/17 year olds.....and they think it is unreasonable that I quickly make my excuses why we won't meet......They don't understand why it is sick. 1 of these guys was 40 and chases 16 year olds, his preference is small brested girls.....wonder why???? it just worries me a bit. I think even 18/19 is pushing it really. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/10/2008 7:25:03 PM | I'm gonna barf!
Time for those men to grow up! Same with men who are 28,29+ who put 18-23 year olds as their min age for a woman that can contact them! YUCK! Just cause you feel young doesnt mean you ARE!
May  | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/10/2008 9:30:51 PM |
Same with men who are 28,29+ who put 18-23 year olds as their min age for a woman that can contact them!
That's silly putting a filter on who can contact them. It's not like us men have our mailboxes overflowing in the first place. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/11/2008 5:12:32 AM | | Christopher93- yeah, I meant from other people. It's amazing how many ways there are to insult a person who's had sex outside of their "normal" age group. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/11/2008 12:58:50 PM | This forum thread seems more like a justification site for pedophiles. And for the women who think its ok sounds like justification for being abused at a young age. Lets face it the human brain does not mature enough to make rational decisions until about the age of 20, later for males( yes we do mature slower) in the old days when most people died by 40 sex started at puberty to keep the race going but that is not an issue today. Life is hard enough without adding sex in the mix as you are growing up. Lets face it,ALL boys want to give it up (viginity) as soon as they can( so do chimps, dogs and reptiles) and girls try to keep until they are "Loved" . In olden days they had a cure for this, chasity belts!!!! If some guy 21 or more was dogging after my 15 year old daughter it wouldn't be intellectual stimulation he was after. I look back on my teenage years and know all my decisions about sex were made with my testicles and not with my brain, any who disagree( I did it for love, acceptance, blah, blah ,blah) are only fooling themselves. to all the young ladies out there, if its true love as he says then he repcts you enough to wait and will handle the pressure build up himself. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/11/2008 1:28:44 PM | it's astounding how many pedophiles are on here.
no amount of inane bs will change the fact that anyone who has sex with a child, who is anyone under 18 period, is a child molestor. | |
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| Sex with minors
Posted: 2/11/2008 1:32:26 PM | Here in Tennessee, anyone that is 3 years older than a minor (under 18) is technically guilty of Statutory Rape. I know it can be tempting, but you are playing with fire and the girl or boy does not have to be the prosecutor, and really can't because they are minors, but whether the consenting minor wants to prosecute or not is not left to them, it's their parents decision and they can hang your butt!
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and we're in the process of raising the age of charging child molestation from 13 to 16, which is a good thing | |
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