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| Update: got back with EX GF afterTour Boat date last year...rest of the story Posted: 5/16/2008 2:04:00 PM | Thanks for the replies. Whoever of you might be closest to the truth, is interesting to ponder. Yeah... new BF (well the old one, who is building her fence), sick of my procrastination, 1/2hr late one too many times for a date, afraid of comittment (that was my wishful thinking), I got a boring feeling on the phone calls, had fun and its all played out....who knows. The good news is, I will not contact her again FOR ANY REASON, until at least 4 weeks from last monday. She didn't steal from me, she didn't **** and scream, she never got drunk (I liked it the couple of times she had a little booze on her breath), there was no drama. She actually didn't like me buying stuff for her ("I don't like jewelry" type of gal). I'm happy she accepted the Shephards hook, HE washer, and used pushreel mower. She didn't want anything from me except kisses and companionship. That should have been the warning "you have nice lips" is like a guy saying "you have nice tits". I want to know if I am what she is in love with, not kissing.
She was the "antidrama" nonconfrontational type. She never brought up anything serious. Such as: "god damit your late for our date", or "I don't know how long we will last if you don't clean up your house", or "No I don't want to see you tonite, I thought you said you were going to work yesterday and you stayed home and goofed on the internet"...etc.
Whereas I think its normal to have "occasional, deep, interpersonal communication", there seems to be others who think if you are truly in love, "Don't go there, keep it lite, have fun". Odd to me a POF forum junkie.
This is turning in to a self pity thread, since I don't even know what my point is now EXCEPT OH YES:
People can get back together, it was worth it, who knows what will happen...But don't be surprised if a week, a month, a year later...You break up for the same exact reasons. Some people call me Einstein... | |
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| Taking EX GF on Harbor Tour Boat this sat, what to talk about Posted: 5/17/2008 5:58:45 AM | | Have fun and enjoy each other's company. Dont force conversation and just let whatever happens happen. If there is chemistry between you two still then just go with it. Talk about whatever you both enjoy. Enjoy and good luck | |
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| Update: got back with EX GF afterTour Boat date last year...rest of the story Posted: 5/17/2008 6:10:12 AM | | I suspect = and you know I don't know Bill - her no-drama bit of not mentioning things that bugged her and subsequently led to her breaking up with you... just might be her accepting/allowing you to be who you are and not try to change you. The bummer part would be when she thought "I can't accept this long term... so I better cut him loose because I don't see a future here" | |
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| Taking EX GF on Harbor Tour Boat this sat, what to talk about Posted: 5/17/2008 6:25:39 AM | At the expense of sounding dour and pessimistic, the boat tour COULD be a new beginning, but in reality, it is more like putting a band-aid on a large gaping wound.
The crux of the matter is what have you done to change yourself so you are not so lazy and self-centered? You can be charming, witty, sincere, etc., on a three hour tour, but what comes after? What will you do differently if she decides to give you another chance?
To use a cliche (I hate cliches, but people tend to easily understand them), the proof is in the pudding. Don't tell her that you have changed, show her. I remember telling my ex for over two years that things in our marriage needed to change, and when I was walking out the door, he was saying, "I've changed! I've changed!" I knew that if I stayed, the changes would be short-lived. | |
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