| | I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!Page 4 of 6 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) | Cutefunguy
thank you and bless your heart for caring enough about the woman, (and other people in her vicinity) to see that she got home safely. NOW that is a TRUE nice guy. And no, I doubt you'll finish last.
As for whether or not she was pregnant, and whether he should have turned her in to some authority or agency, I guess that's a judgement call, and I can find no fault with someone who's judgement tells them to BUTT OUT. Nor would I condemn anyone who had the guts to investigate further and took the risk of involving the police or Child Protection, but the key phrase there is "investigate further".
OP wait til you go on a date who brings along her mother, or her kids or her cats, or maybe all of the above....NOT!
Cindy O | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 12:32:00 PM | I think that is a classic problem with people "butt out" let them drive drunk, beat their kids, steal from their neightbours, sell drugs out of their house, cheat at cards ... after all what harm are they doing in the world eh...
My father use to say ( a cop for many years) that the only way a crime is solved or detected is someone calls it in, very rarely do the police in their patrols actually find a crime in progress.. So if everyone butt's out, what do we have....
It is not the OP's just to investigate further, its the professionals job to do that, all he need to is call it in. sorry drinking and pregant, no. No amount of justification is gonna change my mind, but will explose those who should not have children if they think its okay. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 12:38:56 PM | I STILL think it's a funny date story. Sorry" Pollyanna", I actually HAVE a sense of humor. Lighten up.........If you are sooooooo interested in saving the world, get the girls number from the OP. Naaaah.....You would'nt want to do all that now would you? | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 12:40:48 PM | | Dear Dynomite Just looking for clarification ,,,, Is a "chick" a woman, or is a pregnant drunk woman a "chick"? When you realize that woman are not chicks you are ready to date women. As for women looking for a hero, oh yah there is not one of us that isn't, and a guy who feels like he is his womans biggest fan is a very happy camper. The owner of this thread has made several comments regarding his behaviour and any competent therapist would question his acts as frightening behaviour that suggest a real derogatory attitude to women. Knowing what he was in store for prior to meeting her and then watching it play out in front of him is strange to say the least. Guys only head out to meet someone if they are interested and lie their best lies when they want out, woman are honest in ending relationships ,men are complete cowards. He went out with her not because he had to or because she was annoying, he went because he felt the hots for her ,,, let's get this straight. Women will do alot of things out of obligation or to be nice... guys are not that nice ..at all. If he was nice he would have made her take a taxi and gave her keys to her when she got in the taxi and left the scene of the crime where he was. The rest of the story smacks of some really bizarre Quentin tarantino movie ... next time you wanna play who wants to be a millionaire .. call a friend first for advice cause the ops behaviour is too wierd..... | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 12:54:57 PM |
When you realize that woman are not chicks you are ready to date women
when you loosen up your mental sphincter a little, you are also ready to deal with life.
you advice reeks of a holier than thou.... ah nvm. not even worth my time.
Guys only head out to meet someone if they are interested and lie their best lies when they want out
woman are honest in ending relationships ,men are complete cowards.
[sarcasm] wow you have us all figured out dontcha? [/sarcasm]
bitter much? heh heh heh hilarious.
anyway.. i still support safeguy's decision on what he did. He didn't have to do what he did but handled it well and has NO obligation to go back for a second date no matter how hard the bible gets thumped around here.
cheers! | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:13:16 PM | Youjustlike heaven...thanks 
Diana...I presume the "Pollyanna" comment was for me. Believe me, if I lived in the same town, city, state or COUNTRY I would take her number and her address and report her/visit/do something proactive but as I live thousands of miles away in the UK it would be a little hard don't you think?? I have a fantastic sense of humour but I fail to see the funny side of potentially damaging a new life before it's even born and quite frankly, I think it is pretty sick that you do.
Howbigisyourlove....get over yourself! Every post I have seen of yours has been completely nonsensical. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:16:04 PM | | With this attitude about men..I bet you think all male cops are pricks if they write you a traffic ticket but losers if you talk your way out of one. There are caring people in the world, some times they do stupid thing thinking it was the right thing to do at the time but later realize their mistake. This gentle man felt he was doing the right thing just getting this lady home. Again he cared enough to make sure that she got into her house. Putting her in a taxi would have been easy enough, but the cabbie wouldn't have taken her to her door, he would have just dropped her off at the curb. Who knows what could have happened to her. He realized he was in on a bad date but saw it through to the end. He could have excused himself to go to the restroom and slipped out the back door if he had been a jerk about it. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:33:14 PM | In the dating world, wonders never cease! I would almost recommend you file that one under amusing annecdotes like I did the Ditzy Chick I went out with in June. Really sad for that kid- on top of being high risk for birth defects- having a drunken stoned slut for a mother.
JF | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:39:15 PM |
Diana...I presume the "Pollyanna" comment was for me. Believe me, if I lived in the same town, city, state or COUNTRY
Try posting in YOUR own forums. And yes...........You ASSUMED not PRESUMED right! Learn the language if you are TRYING to post in a different COUNTRY! BTW.........Did you know that telephones can actually CALL another country? No excuse not to be all over that! | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:47:52 PM | Sorry, Diana but its an open general forum and I think this exhibits the difference in social style been an open individual is for themselves and the more social "peace order and good government" life styles.
Not sure why your ranting on someone for posting in the forum, all she did was advocate to turn the drunk woman driving / kid abusing woman into the police. Are you saying your okay with the drunk woman's actions ?
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:50:43 PM | pepsi40
no one is suggesting that people should routinely turn a blind eye to KNOWN( or SERIOUSLY suspected) child abuse, theft, drug trafficking or DUI.
in this PARTICULAR instance, the scenario related by the OP, he didn't KNOW if the lady in question was in fact pregnant. Yes, women can get beer bellies. Low back or abdominal muscle injuries can cause a pot belly. So can previous pregnancies. I admit that I do wonder,( since he realized from minute one of the date that he wasn't interested in any future dates) why he didn't inquire about her upcoming "blessed event" and if she was aware of all the research about the dangers that smoking and drinking pose to an unborn child? Perhaps the lady would have reported a tumor, a low back or abdominal injury, metabolic syndrome( I'm not sure whether overindulgence in adult beverages is a great idea for metabolic syndrome, but it's very easy for someone suffering chronic pain to get dependent on alcohol and/or pain medications).
Personally, I saw the OPs creation of the thread as a a "so you think YOU had a bad date" narrative, not to ask for a critique of his behavior. But that's just my opinion.
Cindy O | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:56:01 PM | from Diana 619...I STILL think it's a funny date story. Sorry" Pollyanna", I actually HAVE a sense of humor. Lighten up.........If you are sooooooo interested in saving the world, get the girls number from the OP. Naaaah.....You would'nt want to do all that now would you?
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sticks and stones...I don't know where you live but if you do not report something you think that could endanger a child's life you can be charged. You are about as deep as a puddle. The fact that this has been discussed on this site and nothing has been done could implicate OP ..maybe not fair but it might. Just might want to find out now that you have shared your "dating" story how responsible were you for reporting...Just might want to find out.
Have called and would call....Could care less about being liked more important to do the right thing. You have my profile...just let me know the details and I will. Do you have children or grandchildren?
AND
And finally, remember:
Even white light can't protect you from stupidity. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:56:55 PM | As some American women seem to find DUI and drinking/taking drugs whilst pregnant hilarious, I am glad this British woman is completely able to post wherever she likes although the last time I checked, these forums weren't exclusively for American people nor are they labelled as such. Try being a little less xenophobic lest you sully the already crappy reputation Americans have got with the rest of the world even more.
Please look up the defintions of assume and presume. I used the word presume deliberately. Don't lecture me on the English language...we invented it.
I know you are on the back foot because you are trying to make your indefensible position somehow defensible but there is no need to get petty or ****y now is there? 
EDIT: I apologise to the many millions of decent non-xenophobic, upstanding Americans for the above. You were not included. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 2:01:43 PM | Rockchick, I work with Americans daily, most are well mannered, smart and respect of all things people. Just takes a few people to ruin a rep, like soccer scum who riot eh... or one lousy President...
The OP actually asked about the drunk driving and has later stated that in future he would call the police.. The Drunk driving he witnessed.. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 2:49:05 PM | | Call the police ..call the police..You're all forgetting one thing. Calling doesn't alway get them there in time to witness the offense. If she lived a mile from the Bar, she would have been home by the time the dispatcher would have put the call out. The police aren't "Johny on the spot" in most cases. It takes an average of 5 minutes just to get the call in to the call taker then you have to factor in response time and availablity of officers. The only thing he can do is try to keep her there so they can witness her driving or try to drive her home. He failed in the latter, but what's done is done. Now we just need to worry about the possible child involved with this pot head woman. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 4:27:51 PM | Everyone, thanks for all the input. I appreciate all of your points of view and respect everyone's contrasting opinions. My objective was to simply write about a dating experience I had.
Think about this. What if I or someone else had called the police on her at the restaurant ...and she freaked out when they came?!! In her physical and mental state, the shear fright the police could cause by just approaching her to talk, in addition to the drugs and alcohol, could have easily made her suffer a miscarriage!
Daetoy makes sense when involving the police in certain things. Most of my friends from home are now cops or firemen. None of them would want to neither deal with this kind of situation, nor face the repercussions of what could happen to them legally or job wise, if their intervention caused her to lose the child. Yes, it's somewhat sad, but more than likely they would have just gotten her safely home. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 9:01:50 PM | Hmmm
"nor face the repercussions of what could happen to them legally or job wise" pardon the pun but that is a cop out and why crime is what it is. If she is drinking like that, baby is most likely gonna be a veggie for its life anyway. | |
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gymnut
| | Joined: 9/10/2007
Msg: 94 | |
| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 9:21:58 PM | ah, excuse me here, but, is not the blame solely on the restaurant? ...why did they keep serving a drunken pregnant woman?????... why is the male date here anywhere near to blame? The restaruant/hotel, whoever sells alchohol has a responsilbility to it's partron's. A drunk person cannot think rationally. Therefore it's up to the server to cut them off and/or call the police.
Must be the Canadian in me!....If I show up somewhere to meet someone, and that someone is blizzed, it's beyond any type of logic that I can think of as to why it's my fault/responsiblilty etc. People need to own up to their problems. You cannot help anyone who does not want to help themsleves! I've tried it before and it don't work.
I don't buy this b.s . she was in "pain"....and somehow it was the date's responsibility to take care of her. Bullshit! No one made her drink. She made a choice. Now, if she wants help in changing her choices, that's different. But it looks to me like she liked the choice she made and wanted someone else to pick up the tab for it!
Move on dude....forget this shit....'cause that's exactly what it is! | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 9:44:53 PM |
Try posting in YOUR own forums. And yes...........You ASSUMED not PRESUMED right! Learn the language if you are TRYING to post in a different COUNTRY! BTW.........Did you know that telephones can actually CALL another country? No excuse not to be all over that!
Wow. That is an impressive amount of foolishness for such a short message.
OP, I don't know how long ago this whole thing occured. And I understand not wanting to involve the police, which always seems really drastic. But, a call to child services might be in order. You'd just have to tell them what you saw, and they'd take it from there. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 10:04:42 PM | | well you cetainly had a reality check.....instead of an illusion !! Get to know your potential date through conversations, etc, before you actually meet them. Usually through sustainned conversations- you can really get to know the person, and they usually will tell you, if there are any clarifications about their personal situations along the way.....before you meet them... good luck to you in your quest. | |
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BDRT
| | Joined: 7/29/2007
Msg: 97 | |
| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/20/2007 10:23:07 PM | | OP, that is all just so wrong on so many levels. I don't know that any one in the same situation would have done any different than you did. You have to wonder if she really thought a guy would be impressed?!?! Is there any guy out there that would want to date that? Maybe if they were just as F***ed up as she was but even then, I doubt it. | |
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syrrus
| | Joined: 7/31/2007
Msg: 98 | |
| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/21/2007 12:11:28 AM | I want to thank howbigisyourlove and rockchick for reassuring me that there are still some really nice, understanding, compassionate people out there, who have brains as big as their hearts  | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/21/2007 4:14:38 AM | "Man, didja just have a lapse or what? I'm worried about ya...... She was EVERYTHING you try to avoid. All rolled into one..."
Something like "pregnancy" is easy to hide, before you actually meet someone in person. You can't see a "baby bump" through email or profile pics, unless it's IN the profile pics. You can't hear it in someone's voice on the phone.
Heck, when he got to the restaurant, she was sitting at a high-top table and hid it till she stood up AFTER he bought her the drink.
Just goes to show that anyone can be anything they want online...you don't really know them till much later on. | |
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| I met a drunk and pregant woman on a first date!!
Posted: 9/21/2007 11:33:23 AM | Oh nice point VERY GOOD ONE.
ah, excuse me here, but, is not the blame solely on the restaurant? ...why did they keep serving a drunken pregnant woman?????... why is the male date here anywhere near to blame? The restaruant/hotel, whoever sells alchohol has a responsilbility to it's partron's
I agree... If she's in pain, call the hotlines that are out there. | |
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