| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/24/2007 9:27:57 AM | Fireknight, you really ought to think before posting statistical analyses. 1) It's none of your business whom I've dated, or how many. 2) To observe, you don't have to date them (hint, hint). 3) I'd lay odds I know more bi-sexual women personally than 95% of the guys on this site (given where I work, probably more than that). 4) You were so busy doing your calculations, you missed the part of my post telling of a more important part of my reluctance: that I'd have to be on the lookout for signs that she's got an active lust for other women, as well as other men, and the signs are far more difficult to see when it's another woman (i.e. women can do things like dance together and hold hands, and it's not usually taken as a sign of having intimate relations).
Now, try this for your statistical analysis: I dated 3 bi-sexual women (2 knowingly, married one of them), and each of them cheated on me with another woman. Each gave essentially the same defense of her behavior--that I shouldn't have a problem with it because it was "no threat" to me. Each also didn't think they needed to tell me what was going on, and for the same reason. Now, as I said, I know a great many bi-sexual women personally (hint, the count is a few dozen), and that attitude seems prevalent. While there are a large minority of that number that have monogamous relationships, it still numbers solidly less than half (that I've counted, and that was giving the benefit of doubt to those I couldn't glean the attitude on).
Is my sampling insufficient? Well, Gallup and other polling organizations take similar samplings (numerically), and their polls are said to be accurate within 3 or 4 percentage points. I don't think I need to know the attitude of every bi-sexual woman on the face of the planet to reasonably draw a conclusion based on my own experiences and observations, and answer the question asked.
The question was would I date a bi-sexual woman, and my answer is no. Been there, been burned by that, learned lesson. Does this mean I'm right about every bi woman walking the face of the planet? No, but then, I never claimed I was the definitive source of information, now did I? My assertion was simple. Based on my experiences and observations, I would not date a bi-sexual woman because of the attitude I've observed as being held by the majority of them.
The comparison you make of bi women to straight is apples-to-oranges. The vast majority of straight women acknowledge that getting intimate with a man other than your b/f is cheating, although they do it quite often, too. The point I was making was that (from my observations) that the attitude is quite different among a large number of bi-sexual women. The attitude I've seen as the prevailing one with a majority that I know is that the boyfriend (or hubby) doesn't need to even know about what she's doing with another woman, simply because it's another woman (the obvious implication, which is sometimes even stated, being that it's not at threat to him).
So, pal, tell me where I'm wrong: my "attitude" comes from the experience of being burned and the observation of the attitude of the majority of bi-sexual women I know. You'll have a tough row to hoe trying to convince me that I should be willing to date another bi-sexual woman.
Cheers, and happy  to all!~Nicebluiz | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/24/2007 9:38:31 AM | Woah...*blinks*
There are some real one sided arguments here. Personally i couldnt care less if a women is bi or straight. So long as she feels comfortable with who she is, it doesnt really matter. | |
|
| |
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/24/2007 10:53:09 AM | | I married a bisexual woman personally I find her to be more loving , more committed and a far better match for me than the hetero women I have dated and her desire to be with women is a natural thing which I embrace, there are many differences between myself and the fairer sex which my wife still enjoys. | |
|
| |
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/24/2007 11:14:18 AM | Wow! That's all I can say about this. BTW, Nicebluiz in case you didnt know a few dozen as a statistical sample is completly unscientific and invalid. Case in point, what if you add the half dozen or so that I know who all have stable relationships. Doesnt that now throw your 50% number below the statistical number of men who cheat on their wives?
SO I guess if dating bi-sexual women is a high risk because now they have more people to fool around with, I guess now that means I better keep my eye on my wife since she speaks 4 languages. Doesn't that make it 4 times more likely she will meet someone to potentially cheat on me with? What am I saying, she speaks Mandarin Chinese, that means she's more like 100 times more likely...I gotta go and check on my wife | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/24/2007 6:25:16 PM | nicebluiz...I feel bad that you were involved with a couple or three gals that were both dishonest and bisexual...however, your experience has no scientific bearing to it - it was bad luck and a bad experience. However, your experience is only one of one side of the arguement and there are a number of guys here who have had nothing but positive experiences with bisexual women...it's not their sexuality that really is the issue, it's their integrity.
And if it's happened to you three times, perhaps taking a look at what you built the relationship on in the first place...what the attractions are..would help and stop you from being attracted to people that are dishonest.
Good luck!
XXX Cat | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/24/2007 7:56:10 PM | Imho , just because someone is bi does not increase the chance that she will cheat. A committed relationship is that reguardless .  | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/25/2007 10:04:05 AM | Thanks for the good luck and advice, Cat, but there's a few points I do need to make. 1) You and Fireknight say I'm not being "scientific," well, Gallup and Scripps use such cross-sections all the time in their polling. Think on this: last Presidential election, over 100,000 Americans voted, and the polling organizations used (typically) a selection of 800-1200 surveyed "likely voters" in their polls, and they call this "scientific." The "few dozen" bi-sexual women I know numbers more like in the 70's range, and over 40 of them (whose opinion on the matter I'm sure of) is what I've told you it is.
2) What you might not get is that having once been burned, it's prudent to pull your hands away from the flames. In my case, it was 3 times. Lesson learned, especially considering the last time it happened, some of the woman's friends (yes, they were bi's) tried to tell me I should have stayed with her, because "it was no big deal, and no threat to you."
3) I'm not so sure "dishonest" is the word you're looking for in describing these 3 women. They each (evidently) had the heartfelt view that what they were doing wasn't cheating. The last one (the same one who's friends tried talking me out of dumping her) was pretty badly hurt when I walked. Point is, the only real way I would call it "dishonest" is if they considered what they were doing wrong, and they didn't.
4) In all my time dating straight women, I've only been cheated on once (yep, walked out of that relationship, too---no reason to tolerate cheating), and I didn't get some odd defense of her bad behavior. I got a rather lame excuse, but she knew what she was doing was wrong, her attempt to excuse it is proof. Point is, I haven't ever seen the attitude that these women had in straight women I've known.
5) No re-evaluation of what you're calling my attraction to dishonest (as you're calling it) people is called for. Most of the women I've dated were honest, in the regard you're using, and quite decent. That things didn't work out the wasy I'd hoped is no indication of "dishonesty." But, of the women I've dated, 3 of the 4 who cheated had a couple common denominators---they were bi-sexual, and had the attitude that having an occasional "piece" on the side from another female shouldn't be a big deal (i.e. wasn't cheating).
Look, Cat, if you (or anyone else) has points to make as to why I should reconsider, I'm all ears. But, the question was asked (would I date a bi-sexual woman), and I answered (emphatically not), and gave my reasons why (those experiences and observations of that attitude). Evidently, you and some others feel I'm wrong not to let myself open for such a disappointment again, and you are free to tell me why.
Best 2 U!~Nicebluiz | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/25/2007 11:02:13 AM | Nicebluiz I pointed out what I did in the manner I did exactly because you did make an implied claim of being a definitive source of information. You do it several times.
I know far too many personally (I work in the biggest place for homosexuals and bi's in the world, lol), and the attitude I run into doesn't match that of LoveSerendipitee here.
Sorry to have to re-inform you, Cat, but my "attitude" is based on experience and observation.
I'd lay odds I know more bi-sexual women personally than 95% of the guys on this site (given where I work, probably more than that).
Those are all examples of claiming a greater "level" of knowlege then others who might be engaging in the discussion including dismissing individuals of the "class" we are discussing.
Your defense of "I don't need to know how many you've dated" being that it is the basis of your argument about why your view is more "correct" then others is kind of already too late, and is irrelevant to the discussion. I already exampled above your actual numbers for the sake of the arguement. The arguement about vote polling is equally irrelevant and misleading. The conduct those polls with a great deal of research they do not just pick up the phone and call 1000 people randomly. The people who are called are from a pool of people who match a great deal of criteria before they are even placed in the calling pool. It's a very controlled subset of people to start with by the time the calls are made, and the questions are very specific to get the needed information. Your observation and experience is far from as scientific.
Had you left your answer to the question as simple as "No I would not my experience has shown me, that my (choice, luck, fortune, etc) with bi-women goes wrong" it nothing else would need have been said. You are totally within your rights to have that feeling and view. When you say its because Bi-women believe X or Y and so they screw you over.. THAT you need to prove beyond a small subset because now you are labeling a class. | |
|
Dave-H
|
Joined: 10/21/2007
Msg: 86 | |
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/25/2007 11:15:21 AM | Nope..... coz if I alone am not enough, regardless if its a man or woman, then, I'm off.
And no, I'm no prude. Strange though as most blokes would freely admit to seeing lady-on-lady as...er, well, you know.... nice?.... but, in a relationship, the rules change. Sure as hell I'd not want my partner seeing another woman OR fella.
HTH.
Dave. x | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/25/2007 11:54:24 AM | I also know bisexual girls but there is one thing I know for definate out there; the bisexual girls I know bar one I would definately date becase for the simple reason that they are geninely nice people and for no other reason; my bisexual friends also seem to understand more.
OK I don't claim to know every bisexual or to make assumptions but I know there are different types and I know the old cliche "never marry a bisexual"
But yes I would date a bisexual, all my closest friends are bisexual. | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/25/2007 12:25:28 PM | I also know bisexual girls but there is one thing I know for definate out there; the bisexual girls I know bar one I would definately date becase for the simple reason that they are geninely nice people and for no other reason; my bisexual friends also seem to understand more.
OK I don't claim to know every bisexual or to make assumptions but I know there are different types and I know the old cliche "never marry a bisexual"
.
and you sir ARE truely wise beyond your years. Kudo's to you for making so many with "age" and experience seem so lacking in that department. 
Oh, and Fireknight, you are the man! Ladies, you need to open you eyes and pay attention to people like Fireknight and Oldwise. These guys are class acts if you ask me. | |
|
EC22
|
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 89 | |
| |
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/25/2007 3:09:48 PM | | in a relastionship a bi sexual girl and a bi sexual guy are called a streight couple, 2 bi sexual females are called lesbians. Unless they plan on sleeping around on eachother or have a similar arrangement, its a mute point. and no, bisexuality does not equal threesomes | |
|
| |
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/25/2007 3:46:56 PM |
It is not the fact that someone is bisexual that matters it is wether or not any person is trust worthy.
straight ,bi or gay there are people will cheat, I have known many straight people who have left their partners after years of marriage for someone else who was straight.Is there a higher risk of STD when dating someone who is bi if they are safety conscious ? compared to someone who is straight who is not. I think the end result is that most people believe that somehow Bi sexuals show a lack of moral judgement which in my experiance has shown that sexual preferance usually has nothing to do with sincerity or moral standing. | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 10/25/2007 7:05:13 PM | You are so right littlewhip! and I am rather miffed to be lumped into some of the assumptions that just because I am 'bi' I would cheat! how ignorant is that?
I know far more straight males (in a committed relationship) and straight females (in a committed relationship) that are stepping out/cheating on their significant others than the 70plus bisexual women I am friends with...far more! so use that as a 'sampling' example if you will. (the number is about quadruple).
My bisexuality is not a factor in signifying that I would cheat! the fact that I choose to be honest when entering any relationship and make the committment to myself and my partner to be monogamous is what matters most.
I don't care whether a girl thinks that playing with another girl while in a relationship isn't cheating...when it's non-consensual and behind someone's back, they were dishonest...so you can keep convincing yourself of their weak arguement...they were dishonest and there is no such thing as being a 'little bit pregnant'. Cheating is cheating and your sexual persuasion does not influence whether you will cheat or not. It's a morality issue, not a sexuality issue.
My being bisexual has nothing to do with my fidelity and I'm sure many of the bisexual women here would agree as would the males that are attached to a bisexual woman.
XXX Cat | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 11/25/2007 6:55:16 AM | | I am bisexual and guess what, when I am in a relationship, I am faithful! Can people please stop making assumptions, most bi people are not more promiscuous than straight, and most do not need to have a man and a woman at the same time! And if they do, its exactly like the straight guys or girls who cheat on their partner! Being bi just means that you can have a relationship equally with a man or a woman, not that you want both at the same time necesserily. | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 11/25/2007 8:23:15 AM | Personally I would and have.
I'm not threatened by another woman and if I care about the woman I'm with, I want her to be happy and complete. I think secure men aren't threatened by other women or men. I can see it could be a problem if her "friend" however was threatened by me and felt a competition for affections.
I remember a few years back in Vegas dancing with some Lesbians at Studio 54. I totally love disco dancing and the music. These two lesbians were both lovely women and thought...I only want to dance and they seem they did as well so I asked them both and took turns. I couldn't believe it caused a rif between them. I mean the claws came out as they decided the other one was having just a "little too much fun" dancing.
I thought whoa...to weird. | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 11/25/2007 8:59:43 AM | I've never dated one that wasn't... they are extra fun because they usually initiate the more taboo sexual encounters  | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 11/25/2007 9:03:03 AM | I've always wondered this. The men I've been with seem like they'd love it if I were bi-sexual, or at least pretended to be in front of them on occasion. I think it's a common, acceptable male fantasy. However, I don't know if this qualifies as being bi-sexual, or just experimenting.
I think if I were a guy, ultimately I would want her to experiment, but not be truly bi-sexual. Too much competition, don't you think? | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 11/25/2007 9:08:25 AM | | I'm totally agreeing with Nice... I've not ever met a single bi chick that considered it cheating to sleep with other women. I talked about this exstensivly with my ex... and she said she didn't even feel the need to let me know and wouldn't even feel slightly guilty. | |
|
| Would you date a Bi-sexual women?
Posted: 11/25/2007 9:45:31 AM | No I could not be with a bi-sexual woman.
I believe in monogamy and whether you are having intimate encounters with members of the same sex or the opposite sex, to me it is still cheating. | |
|
| |
Home
login 
