| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/4/2008 3:32:27 PM | | your so full of **** as it is usually the mother who works to deny the father their "natural" relationship with the child for whatever reason , usually there own selfish ones. as for a man being a "controller" which you say is often the case when a man has sole or primary custody , what planet you living on have you any idea how difficult it is for a father to get sole custody of a child as the law usually comes down on the side of the mother. a father that has been granted custody of the child has been for a good reason ,the best interest of the child, and no other, | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/4/2008 10:08:28 PM | | I think it depends on the person. Perhaps you should be up front and honest before you meet someone. Maybe she didn't want to feel as if she would have to play the "mom" role for your child. I dated a man once with a child and honestly I hated it. The kid was very disrespectful and he never listened to what his dad told him to do. I don't mind kids as long as they are well behaved children. But I don't think I would want to date or be with anyone who has a kid. Because I don't want to raise anyone else's child or feel like I have competition with the kid. And I am sure that a lot of men feel the same way about women who have a kid. | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/4/2008 10:30:49 PM | | You know what..I can agree with this...ON purpose mind you, When I first started my account, I purposly DIDNT put the fact in my about me that I had a son and I got messeges left and right daily...But when I put in my profile that I had a son, all of a sudden, my messeges almost completely disappeared...So yes, I do agree with this | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/6/2008 9:36:40 AM | The same thing happened to me.I met a girl online,and we started dating,were having fun,we liked each other,but as soon as my child was introduced into the picture,she began to backpedal real fast! Now it wasn't because she didn't like the child,she loves and accepts all children,but she kept saying that was a lot to ask of somebody,and she was right.But I really wasn't trying to ask that of her,it was more like,you get me,you get the kid ,too.Now I am not looking for someone to dump my kid on,but I sure could use a little help.And I'm not going to be a shut-in who never dates just because I'm a single parent.Single parents have a life,too,ya know.It's just that these "it's all about me,me,and me" type women just don't have the character or the guts to ever get beyond thinking ONLY of themselves! That's why they run,just afraid of real commitment,thats all! | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/6/2008 10:11:36 AM | Way to go Darylr that's exactly what I say, "If a woman is not willing to accept my kids,they are not the one for me..." That's right,the kids ALWAYS come first! You know that old saying, "blood is thicker than water" and it's true! The kids are your blood,man! Oh,and check this out: the reason that I'm a single dad is the "bio-mom"(an unhealthy woman with no perception of father's rights)was an obsessive controller who attempted to deny the child and his father their natural god-given rights to a relationship,and the correct,accurate perception here is that it was the "mother" who abandoned,neglected and walked away from her own baby that she carried in her womb for nine months,and that it was the father who "stepped up to the plate",took responsibility for his child and his actions,and loved his baby too much to walk away from him,although I easily could have.The point of all this is that FATHERS HAVE RIGHTS ,TOO!   | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/6/2008 10:27:52 AM | | It is very hard for a single father.I have had to rearrange my life and its hard but my son is my world. I just wish we could find someone to share it with us. Be it that they have children or not, | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/6/2008 10:48:19 AM | to the side of this: Why do these Threads stay around forever!
Now: Rearrage your life for your Kids.... The children didn't ask for the divorce or break up... It is our resposnpoibilit as parents to be there.... It isn't there Divorce.
A woman doesn't want to hear that the Kids are your World! That says you, woman will never be first and there isn't room for you... Children aren't in the romantic and a woman can be first there and later shown respect that she is a leader in a new household though not parentng older children for instance.
Getting and securing a Great Babysitter is neccessary for better dating and especially in a marriage! Introducing children to your new love shouldn't happen too soon. False bonding is difficult on children and grown ups who beging to love our kids too.
Blending families and learning the Real about that is worth the homework for the sake of a new love and the Children!!! Christian writers have some awesome series about Blended Families and it is not Hell or High water. It is real life.
Doing the homeowrk and then seeking the new love will have a better result in dating and woman or men for that matter not running!!! Set yourselves up for success and communication with the kids and possible loves is Key!
OK.. It was long . I want more real love out there for those that seek that, for me too...  | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/6/2008 11:19:41 AM | Just wanted to jump in here....
I think it's terrific that you've made your son a priority, and I understand how hard it is to meet new people. It seems every time I think it's a good time to introduce a new guy to my daughter, he turns out not to be the one. But, we have to take chances, and let our children see that we are moving forward in our lives, and that's it's also possible to be happy without a partner. Hopefully they'll learn from our experiences, and understand that you don't always marry your first love, or your 10th! Good luck....stay positive.
~Leigh Anne | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/6/2008 11:54:45 AM | I admire a man who is there for his kids....custody or not.
If you have a child or children, SAY it in the profile. No surprises, be proud to be a dad!
I won't date a man that doesn't have or hasn't had kids. People are just different once they have been a parent. I like what being a parent does to a person so I look for that.
I wouldn't go so far as to say I wouldn't date a man who hasn't had kids, but the reason why he doesn't could have some bearing. I used to have the rule that if he hasn't had kids, I wasn't interested because I figured he was probably self-absorbed all these years and not my type.
I had a 10 year relationship with a man who had no kids of his own, but adopted his ex's kids. Even after we split up, he came to see my daughter's sons when they were born...calling them his grandsons, when he moved to Nevada and I was still in CA...so you can be childless and still a good man. (That won't be happening anymore, because I'm in PA now and he has a fear of flying....I feel bad that this hurt their relationship....my daughter's real father is deceased)
However, I broke that rule again in my last relationship, and found that grandkids seemed to be a problem....
I prefer a man who has been through fatherhood...whether he still has them or not is irrelevent. Being a father seems to give them a HEART....also keeps them 'young at heart' in their spirit. 
~DC~ | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/29/2008 4:26:11 PM | I'm not afraid, infact , when i first started out in the site, i actually perferred single dads...but it didnt work out that way.
I have male friends who are raising their children on their own and I have the ultimate respect for them(dads). | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/29/2008 4:47:18 PM | | Sorry i disagree, I am a single mum and i started seeing a guy off here who was a single dad of 3 and after 5 months he has given me the just friends line. As for women meeting guys when they have kids i find it really hard, I have guys running away very quick when i say i have kids! | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/30/2008 7:20:02 AM | I don't know it all seems kind of silly to me. It's a matter of preferences. I'm an almost-divorced mom w/primary custody so I have my kids most of the time. And yes there are guys who would not date me because of that. Heck, that's their choice. C-Ya!
Same with women who would not date a guy with kids...just tell them C-Ya!
But for most of us, after we get to a certain age, we are gonna come with kiddos...that's a fact of life. It's not a big deal. yes, I'm a mom and yes I have kids. But I am also a woman, not just a womb.
If I meet a man with kids, I'd hope he either has custody or as much visitation as he can squeeze into his schedule... because devotion to children is important to me. If he's a dad who never sees his kids and doesn't much care, that would seriously turn me off.
If I meet a man without kids, in my age range, I'd want to know why. And if it's because he doesn't want any...that would send up a red flag...because sure for dating the kids don't need to go along, but they ARE part of my permanent life and if things get serious he'd need to understand that they are gonna be there - and he'd need to love and enjoy them. They already have a dad - they don't need another one. But they do need to get along with any long term or permanent partner I'd find.
Kaylie | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/30/2008 3:31:11 PM | LMAO...halfsies? Sure, why not.... Let's get started right now...
As long as I get to name it.......
How about Ester if it's a girl and Harold if it's a boy? Oooh, no, I want Gilbert if it's a boy. and Bertha for a girl.
Say, let's make twins, then you and I can each name one.
Kaylie | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/30/2008 3:39:23 PM | Princess, I dont care what you name him/her as long as you dont just lay there when I fertilize you. Oh, btw, I have supersperm, so you can be sure you'll be pregnant after the first time. :)
Damn, would you kiss me and look me in the face with those pretty eyez? Im excited. | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/30/2008 7:38:01 PM | So lets chalk one up again for the guys. This just happened to me the other day. I told the woman right away from the first communication....she knew I had two children and full custody. We went on a date and then after she tells me every excuse under the sun. Then after a long discussion it comes out.
Three hours of skirting the issue ( or lying ) and then she finally says the truth. I don't want little kids around. I want to be the number one priority. No problem I can understand that. But, why all the bull, three hours of it. (sparring your feelings...etc is all bull too. ) She knew ahead of time. Playing games. You know whats worse its not just one gender. No matter what, when someone who your dating has kids involved, if your not sure for whatever reason that might lead to a break up be up-front right from the start. Have a little stability and compassion and courage for the parent of the child/ren and be honest with them. Not a wait and lets see attitude! That is not what we need, don't play that game with single parents.
If you are a parent tell them before it gets to the date, that you have child/ren......
bye for now | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/30/2008 7:49:11 PM | | i know of many who wont date single parents...main reason was...they were never a priority. i personally feel, its about balancing your life to make someone a priority as well as everyone else in your life. no one likes to be second or last....we all know children are demanding and come first....dont have to tell anyone that... its common sense. hm common sense, now thats another story....many dont have a clue as to what it is. | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/30/2008 7:51:49 PM | I dissagree, I actually am attracted to a good Dad. Perhaps it wasn't the fact that U r a Dad but lacking in the good part and that came across on your date. Or else she was just a shallow tart, lol. Myself I like a guy with a child. Shows their mature, nurturing side you won't find in a childless biker dude, lol. No, not knocking biker dudes at all, but you know what I mean | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/30/2008 7:57:41 PM | Well I had a guy friend awhile back that was perfectly happy to have me as a FWB between relationships but told me flat out he could never get serious with a woman who had young children (under 18, that is) because he did that already (his ex had a young'un when they married) and he wasn't about to do it again.
So...truly, it goes both ways.
And, fwiw, I appreciated his honesty. And I had told him upfront all I was looking for was a FWB. THis was my first "relationship" after separating so I guess you could say I was on the rebound.
And indeed, we went our separate ways when he fell for a woman whose children were adults... and hey, while I was down for awhile (mostly my ego but sure, I missed his company too), but now I'm with someone who LIKES kids and is fine with me having young children...and he's a fulltime dad too. So *there*! (and...the FWB is still with his woman...7 months and counting so good for him!)
Kaylie
oh and starromeo dude...sorry can't kiss you...wouldn't be a nice thing to do to my BOYFRIEND! | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/30/2008 8:30:10 PM | Boyfriend????
What a lucky b**tard. Youre on here flirting, and he's probably asleep so he can get up early tomorrow and hustle another day down to feed your azz and pay the internet bill so you can flirt while he's asleep.
Do you have any naked pics? The eyez are killing me. I would really like to see the whole package. He's not going to care..C'mon sweetness, poppi wants to play. | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/31/2008 6:27:06 PM | | I know a number of single moms. It seems like all single parents have the same struggles in the dating world. I've dated a single mom, and know other guys who run when they learn a child is in the equation. I have no idea who has it tougher, but do think that it's very difficult for both single moms and single dads to make it in the dating world. | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/31/2008 6:47:04 PM | I have given a chance to 2 men both have had kids. One the kids are almost grown. the other his son is 15. when i pushed the REAL issue with both
 to get their rocks off  
don't want a "big"family Don't want the kids
the women aren't scared they just want to use you the same want to give them that
"schtoopin' your urban legend"
sorry dudes. are any of you interested in a large family? I have 2 youngin's boy and girl under 5 yrs old? | |
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| Single Dads with kids! Why are women scared?
Posted: 7/31/2008 10:13:34 PM | OMG....vivaciousvixen2 what you said is so true. Its to bad you live so far away. Both my kids are young, my boy is 10 and my little princess is 7, and you know what, I agree whole heartedly with what you said.
I could tell you a couple of stories for sure. The last lady I dated couldn't understand why intimate sexual encounters for me had to wait till marriage also. ( I know off topic )
I can understand the others point of view. However I am not going to jeopardize my children's mental or emotional health to make someone more important than one other person. So if people need to be number one in someone else's life then maybe...( not gonna finish that thought..... to many people will get defensive!)
If you want to chat vivaciousvixen2 then send me an email. I can't send you one. | |
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