| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 2:12:48 AM | No i think if need sexaul release and have someone that yuo like to have sex
with and they you that's good for both of you.
As i say looking for the one want to share you life is hard ,
But untill you find the one might as well have some fun.
No reason not to enjoy yourself while you look. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 2:19:38 AM | sorry yall but i think its dirty to be sleeping with someone if your out there dating and trying to fall in love. kinda laughable even, not too surprising though.
-just beacuse i dont like dating doesnt mean im not going to do it and put a big damn crap eating grin on my face while in the process. i dont like having to go to wake up early to go to work all week but i do it so i have a decent form of life. the process sucks until that needle in the haystack is found and then it becomes all worthwhile. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 2:27:04 AM | | yes it is wrong; what guarantees that your feelings to the beloved person when u get him to be true and lasting. I don't see that u r ready for commitment of love and marraige | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 2:32:22 AM | Some people join a bowling league, some people play pool, some people join a softball team.
Some people fly model airplanes or build model trains in their basement.
Some people do gardening, or collect stamps.
Exactly how can a guy get started in this sort of hobby ? | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 2:48:05 AM | Yep
I canceled a second date with a woman once and she got all bent out of shape. I told her I would no longer go out with her when she told me she had some guy she went on vacations with and was 'doing' but lived far away. Sorry I'm not one for sloppy seconds. She said it was OK because they used 'protection' All I know is if they do it with them... they will do it with you also.
I want a realtionship, and that person needs to be available to date. That means emotionally ready.. It's inpossible to have a intimate physical relationship when someone is getting it from someone else. Lets face it, that is the goal of everyone on here. Be it an intimate encounter or marriage.
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 10:40:07 AM | Gawd this is just wrong, you guys, sploppy seconds palease.^^^ She can be emotionally ready for the RIGHT relationship, but in the mean time a girl needs d*ck from time to time. 
Oh I forgot men never have casual sex, and only hold out for the one woman they might think is "the one". yah right
I think part of the OP's problem is, she should be keeping her casual fun private. OP, I can tell you right now, there is many many woman who have or had the same set up that you have right now. Looking for the Mister Right, but having needs, and keeping someone on the side for the time being.
Nothing wrong with that in my opinion. But with society the way it is, and we all know how most men and people in general react to this. Best to keep it to your self.
But if you do find "the right one" he will understand.
so maybe you can use it as a weeding tool, tell them, and see who sticks around. *shrugs* | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 10:48:41 AM | yeah. like i'll know a guy is a manwhore so why not use him for the only thing he's good for. i don't wanna get my heart broken(if that's feasible) so why not just get what i want. i want to be in love but it involves too much from me. its a gamble. i've made a vow that by HALLOWEEN i'm gonna have a new humpbuddy. but not just any old****and balls, he's gotta be smokin.
screw what people say, if they're talking about you they're clearly interested...
fock them tricks | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 10:58:41 AM |
outmind.............. she doesn't want that guy she is sleeping with, can't you read? She says they aren't even friends and they have been doing this for 1 1/2 years. If their feeling and emotions were going to expand it would have happened by now. Some people can seperate sex and emotions, they have obviously.
Yeah I can read. But I can also read between the lines and you can say you are not friends and have sex for one and a half year and I can say that is simply bull. You have to have some degree of emotions for the person. Even in the exchange of hello, how was your day, okay lets take our clothes off, there is an emotional exchange.
Also I don't believe you can separate emotions from sex, maybe one time or two, but after a while something evolved either towards the person or away from the person. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 12:28:03 PM | | ok, I said me and michael arent friends...as in we dont go hang out, we dont talk on the phone ect....I never said I didnt care about him as a person, michael is funny, he makes me laugh, he is a great guy, he just is not my type of guy, he is a free-spirit as am I and you up-tights want to make it sound like we are bad children sneaking around, we are not...and to be totally honest, I wanted the womens thoughts on this one, not some 24 year old loud mouth dork who puts his two cents in on every forum...so vegas KID sit down, shut your mouth, get some experience with life and love then voice an opinion, | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 12:41:17 PM | ^^^^^^^^^^Sorry Irish you put it out there on a public forum........
I will give you my opinion. I think that it is something that I wouldnt do for two reasons. The fact that you are in a "relationship" with this man regardless of how you "see" it and that complicates your ability to be objective. And I think that you are doing yourself a diservice by continuing to "use" this person for your own gratification, because that is what you are doing even if he is on board with it. I am not an up-tight person, thats just the way I see it.
And Vegas does give you an honest example of how many people/men see your situation and is just maybe not sugar coating it as much as some of the others on here. He is allowed to have his opinion whether you like it or not. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 1:53:05 PM | I'm not sure why you care what we think. But, if the situation is agreeable to both of you I do not see anything wrong with it. But I have no idea how you could have sex with someone 3x a week for a year and a half and not consider it a steady relationship, hell most Hollywood marraiges don't last that long.
I don't know how I would feel at my age to know that the man I sleep with wants nothing else to do with me. It is such a small part of yourself to give. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 2:06:34 PM | | nothing wrong with it, as long as you are both on the same page. Enjoying the act of physical love is great with two people mature enough to handle it. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 2:11:29 PM | Op, someone telling me when we were dating, that they had an eff buddy, would make me close the door on any possibilities.
Don't get me wrong, I don't CARE if they had one, but if they're dating me, I'd expect that eff buddy not to exist. You're "confessing" to something that you shouldn't be doing when you're dating someone, or you're "confessing" to something in the past...even if it is 2 weeks in the past.
Your past sexual history is your business and no one else's. Someone asking me about mine is a red flag in my book. And I don't ask about anyone else's. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 2:56:56 PM | | I have never been able to separate emotions from sex, so I don't get the whole sex partner thing. I want more for myself than to be someone's p*ssy. Why not try to be completely by yourself for a while and see if you can discover ways to re-invent yourself. Some people are good with screwing everyone they see but if you have committed your body to one man for a year and a half, you are in a relationship. You are just settling for a piece of something, rather than have nothing at all. Trust me, you and Michael share an intimate relationship. The whole sex partner thing is just another way that people can claim to not be together so that they won't owe each other anything and can't be asked for anything from the other one. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 3:24:13 PM | I don't think what you have described is so uncommon.
What you have described sounds very very similar to my 13yr marriage, sadly my husband never ever moved from the initial lust stage into even wanting to be a friend. I didn't think that was possible, when I called it a day - there was no grieving - because there was no sense of loss at all. I suggest you have hung onto Michael as a safety net - which you don't need.
I agree with earlier posters though, that even though the arrangement is convenient, whether single or married - to put time and effort into something that is not giving you fair return is only holding up better prospects. I think hanging onto Michael and admitting his presence in your life is destroying your chances of the real deal - which you fully deserve. No-one ever deserves to be treated as a convenience - that is what toilets are for.
I also suspect many men are getting sex, and not telling someone they are getting to know. Dishonest if they are asked and deny the situation yes, but is it relevant until things look like becoming intimate? Probably not. If you suggesting 2 timing well - that has ethical and medical problems. I can imagine a man who really felt something for you would be devastated and shocked, and you would lose the real prize for a cheap trick who doesn't love you. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 3:48:29 PM | Hmmmmm..........well its your life after all and, therefore, you are free to live it as you wish. The problem i would have with your sort of lifestyle though, is that i have to have an emotional attachment to a man before i engage in a sexual connection.
It sounds like you have a FB, but i believe eventually it will lead to heartache. If neither of you is likely to become jealous of the other one, i would find the arrangement too clinical, or one which is just feeding a human need without any sort of feeling involved.
It's your life as i said previously, but i dont know why you want to ask the question on here if what you are doing seems so right for you, or is it because you are not so sure? | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 3:57:38 PM | Irish girl,
Personally, it's no one's business really, but your own. I have a FWB situation, but he and I are friends, go out on 'dates' and get along well...for the most part. I do not think having a sexual relationship only is bad, but some folks will frown upon it. I have a 'male' friend who also insists my FWB is my boyfriend, but I insist he is not. If I were exclusively seeing him would be a different matter, but I am not.
I don't see it as an issue, so long as you don't mind then what other people think shouldn't matter. If you enjoy the sex and there are no strings...I say more power to you. I think it's just hard for some guys to believe that a woman can just want sex and nothing else from a man. Boys need to wake up.....women are as assertive sexually as they are and can do it with no strings attached just as well as they do. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 4:04:06 PM | Why do people post questions on here looking for others opinions on what they are doing, thinking or feeling? If you are doing, thinking or feeling something then no one can tell you if it's wrong or right. Only YOU can do that.
Are you comfortable with your decisions? If you are questioning yourself what does that say to you?
Good luck | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 4:04:43 PM | | i had a fwb and i couldn't help but get attached,so for me,never again.i want more then just sex,i want it all.it's your life,but just becareful on how you live it. | |
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| he's just a sex partner..is that wrong?
Posted: 10/22/2007 4:24:52 PM | | OP, that's a long time for a sexual relationship and not having it turn into more. I can't go too long before I would begin to feel that I wanted more from her than just sex. I'm not judging you, but I just don't understand it. | |
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