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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/5/2007 10:38:09 AM | > women are finally fed up with the whole "it's fine for an older guy to be
> with a younger woman but not an older woman with a younger guy is wierd".
What a funny thing to say, seeing as how older guys with young women have been criticized and lampooned for ages as cradle robbing dirty old men just wanting arm candy to compensate for their mid-life crises, etc. etc.
The reason "an older woman with a younger guy is wierd [sic]" is because no one could understand why such a guy would be so desperate, and if he was why the woman would want to have anything to do with him. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/5/2007 10:41:36 AM | I'm not seeking them out. For some reason, they seem to like me and the guys my own age are either intimidated or want 'em much younger.   | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/5/2007 12:25:31 PM |
The reason "an older woman with a younger guy is wierd [sic]" is because no one could understand why such a guy would be so desperate,
aw come on life, you are smarter than that, maybe "some" guys do it out of desperation, but many just like older women. Or are attracted to an individual regardless of age.
Or are you baiting?
lol | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/5/2007 6:02:51 PM | This is an interesting forum. Until recently I'd never dated younger guys. Always older, by quite a bit. My ex was 7 yrs older. I've also had serious relationships with a man who was 9yrs older and one who was 13 yrs older.
When a 28 yr old was interested, I was skeptical , but I thought why not. Long story short. No. Never again. (this was recent and only a 3 yr gap, not 10, still too much)
It's shameful. Women live longer then men, but men take way longer to mature.
I'm not painting all younger men with the same brush, so please don't attack me, I just feel older men have more in common with me. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/5/2007 7:41:06 PM | There are lots of middle-aged divorced women around looking for a little action, so it’s not surprising that some of them go for younger guys. After all, the younger guys are often easier for them to get into bed -- and they are also easier for the older woman to shoo away when they are done playing with them because few younger guys want to keep an older women long, anyway.
I guess I'm "middle-aged", coming upon 40 soon and all.
BUT I've never been married, never been divorced, do not have children, and enjoy actually going out ... OUT OF MY HOUSE ... and finding different things to do with someone.
I don't go after young men, they come after me.
I try and try and try to connect with men around my age or older, who should be "mature" because of their age ... hasn't happened yet.
So I have a date with a 27 year old hottie Friday night.
Is that my preference? not really.
Would I rather sit at home and be on POF? NOT REALLY!!! | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/6/2007 4:28:10 AM | without it being a concious decission I have dated younger men for the last few years, all by coinsidence. I would like to meet someone my own age or a little older but it's so difficult, there's something going on with men 30 - 45!
My single friends agree, they are inconsiderate, thoughtless and are damn right lazy in putting any effort into a relationship, it's contravertial idea but I'm affraid women of 50+ have raised these men, we have ourselves to blame!!
Men 45 + still have manners & manage romance, men under 30 are able to hold a conversation with emotion without avoiding eye contact or mumbling
I'll keep trying to find one of the rare good ones in the right age catagory though x | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/6/2007 5:12:21 AM | | I loved all the answers on here in respose to this question. I am 30 and before I turned 30 I didn't see a problem dating younger guys, but now I do have a preference. I thought age didn't matter, and most of the time it doesn't, but to some individuals age still does matter. It just depends where you are looking and what you are looking for. Everyone has an agenda for their relationship at that time. Where its going? How far will it go? Do I love him or not? How much should I put into it? Can I fake it? LOL you know the important questions. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/6/2007 6:00:11 AM | | It's always comes down to the question of age doesn't it? I simply adore women like Gena Davis and Demi Moore. At the moment they are my personal heroes because they are proving that the boundaries of age can be broken. Now in a few years when their marriages explode before their very eyes - and we know this will happen because it always does in Hollywood, doesn't it? - then I might be singing a different story. In the past few years I have tended to gravitate towards younger men. Perhaps it is because I see them as less of a threat to my independence. In my heart I know they are not interested in me because they are looking for a life long mate to marry and have children with and grow old with. That's okay, I don't want to get married again, I can't have children, and I have no intentions of growing old. On the other hand, men my age tend to fall into two categories. (I know I will probably be blasted for this one, but here goes...) They seem to either be searching for that woman to settle down with, who cooks and cleans and provides sexual favors etc. while they come in nightly and prop their feet up and wait to be waited on OR they are perfect cads who have been burned by the black sheep women of our time and have now decided that the only thing women are good for is to be f'd and left. I'm sorry, but I don't fall into either of those categories. I refuse to grow old gracefully and I'm fighting it every step of the way. I lead a very busy life often working two jobs, playing in a band, going to the gym, and finding new adventures to get into. If I could find a nice guy my age who can keep up with me and isn't intimidated by me and who insists that MY life become his personal property to manage then I would consider him with all sincerity and probably pursue the hell out of him. But until then, I'll just content myself with younger men because quite frankly they are way more interesting and don't seem to have a problem keeping up - and there is always, ALWAYS, another one waiting just around the corner. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/6/2007 9:08:09 AM |
I guess I'm "middle-aged", coming upon 40 soon and all.
BUT I've never been married, never been divorced, do not have children, and enjoy actually going out ... OUT OF MY HOUSE ... and finding different things to do with someone.
I don't go after young men, they come after me.
I try and try and try to connect with men around my age or older, who should be "mature" because of their age ... hasn't happened yet.
So I have a date with a 27 year old hottie Friday night.
Is that my preference? not really.
Would I rather sit at home and be on POF? NOT REALLY!!!
I am the same age as you, and I agree. Few men my age can just go with the flow, enjoy life, don't have issues or baggage and are real mature. So I go where it's drama free. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/6/2007 10:42:49 PM |
Maybe it is just me but I notice just as many women over 30 who are looking for men 10+ years younger than themselves as women looking for men older than themselves.
I have no problem with this. I hope everyone finds happiness. I am curious though to undersyand why this is? Why and how have we as a society changed our attitude. Until maybe 20 years ago women always looked for men the same age or slightly older..that has changed and I am wondering why?
Anythoughts?
I didn't read the entire thread. (sorry) But, my thoughts on this...
Women in many instances, have been left for a younger woman and been 'traded up'.
I think, women have come a long way with regards to careers, gaining respect, and selfrespect, too, and have come to feel that if men can do it, surely women can, too. And they do! Good on them. In many instances, too, just as it does for men, it makes them feel younger, more alive, and vital. Not to mention sexual.
I, myself, prefer men my age or slightly older, but that's just me. I won't rule out someone younger. That would be wrong. Life is full of surprises.
Either way, it's what makes a person happy, and life more fun and worth living. Enjoy! | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/6/2007 11:19:30 PM | | woman like younger guys for their body and older guys for their wavelength,they have to choose whats more important.the bedroom or the umpteen hours outside of it. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/7/2007 5:35:16 AM | | Well I'm a 38yr old woman, new to the single scene and I don't think I would date anyone under 35 because thats just not me. I prefer good conversation before sex not that I'm against sex, I love it like anyone else but If I can't converse with the guy then forget it. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/7/2007 5:43:49 AM | | Ten years is too many (i think) but since 40 is the new 30.... it's no surprise! :) I think most of us are wearing our age very well and can get the younger guy if we choose. But..... I haven't even had coffee yet this morning, so what do I know, lol. | |
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Awrita
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Joined: 12/2/2007
Msg: 91 | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/9/2007 10:15:50 AM |
I'm not seeking them out. For some reason, they seem to like me and the guys my own age are either intimidated or want 'em much younger.
That's my experience, too. I finally put an age restriction on because most of the mail I was getting was from 50+. When I was 23, I dated a man 30 years my senior, and that big of a gap does make a difference.
I seem to be more attractive to men in their early 40's, though, and I like them, so it's not really an issue.
GG
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/9/2007 1:52:14 PM | I have had an interesting time observing the responses I've received in the very short (1 1/2 months) I've been on here. It truly amazes me the amount of messages I get from the 18 to 30 year old crowd, which is flattering but downright weird. I have a 16 year old daughter who has a 17 year old boyfreind. At the same time, I have attempted dating a 60 year old in the past and it was like dating one of my parents' freinds (ewwwwww!!).
I know age difference isn't a concern for other people. My own sibling is married to someone who is 20 years older than she is and they seem happy. I have a freind who is 20 years older than her husband and they have a good marriage. My preference is to stay within my own age range. I don't feel like I have much in common with my parents' generation and I can't relate to someone who just got out of high school who thinks they want a Mrs. Robinson, but that is just me. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/9/2007 3:54:51 PM | | I have dated women within 2-4 years older and younger than me and once a ladt 12 years older than me. For some reason most of the women who find me attractive now are 24-29 years old...not sure why but I am open to older ladies as long as we like each other. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/9/2007 3:57:27 PM | Age shouldn't be the only factor- within reason.
People have differing maturity levels, needs and wants at any age.
I match best with men just a few years younger.
Many men my age or older slow a bit and have less energy, curiousity.
Those who haven't usually rule me out because of my age. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/9/2007 5:46:00 PM | I'm "guilty" of this, and I think the internet part of internet dating has something to do with this. When you're on a dating site, it's almost like shopping for a boyfriend. Everything is laid out in these neat little packages - the profile contains the pic, the hobbies, what you might do on dates, and some indication of their personality. I think it is only natural to prefer the generally better looking, more active guy who gets out more, and is a lot of fun, if browsing through a range. Of course there are exceptions (ugly, boring young guys and hot, active old guys), but there's going to be a bit of a bias towards the younger guys. If you don't believe that guys look better in their twenties, just take a look at profiles where there's pics from several different time periods. It's pretty obvious when older men post their current pics next to a few of themselves several years younger - most of the time, their late thirties/forties pics are just not as cute as their twenties pics, even though the recognizable features are the same, and it's the same person. It's just human nature, with a simple biological reason to naturally prefer the younger look.
It is also more commonplace these days to be in your thirties and still not necessarily looking to find a husband type right away. More breakups and divorces these days leads to more rebound time. Women are more able to live their lives as singles, and more likely to be not looking for a husband type at all, ever.
I never rule out men my age and slightly older (and even think it's more likely to find someone serious in that age group), but I am aware that I am getting a bit spoiled with cute, younger guys who just wanna have fun, and find it hard to go back. | |
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bsg789
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Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 97 | |
| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/9/2007 9:33:44 PM | | I prefer men who are about 5-12 yrs younger than me because I generally have more in common with men from that age group. I am currently seeing a man that is 12 yrs younger than me. However I wouldn't rule out a man that is around my age or a few years older than me. I also wouldn't date a man that is 20 yrs younger than me. I think an age difference of 20+ yrs would cause problems in the relationship. There are several reasons why there are more younger men / older women relationships. More available women over 30 due to the divorce rate and more women are waiting longer to get married. Let's face it. There are more attractive women in their late 30s, 40s, and early 50s due to medical advances slowing down the aging process, having a good diet, and proper exercise. I think women in this age group get the most out of the looks they have. We generally know what type of hairstyle, makeup, wardrobe, skin / beauty products makes us look better. | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/10/2007 2:19:55 AM |
without it being a concious decission I have dated younger men for the last few years, all by coinsidence. I would like to meet someone my own age or a little older but it's so difficult, there's something going on with men 30 - 45
try reading this thread - all shall be revealed http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts8799359.aspx
I try and try and try to connect with men around my age or older, who should be "mature" because of their age ... hasn't happened yet.
many women say this - its a very braod swipe of the brush -- try being more specific, if at 38 owning your own home worth close to a mil , having 8 % body fat, having 2 degrees, traveled and lived overseas, not having any out of wedlock children , not being married and divorced once let alone numerous times, not owning a xbox or ps3, no drug or alcohol use - is being immature well better shoot me now as there really is no hope
I prefer men who are about 5-12 yrs younger than me because I generally have more in common with men from that age group.
You are 40 years old - and you get along with people younger than yourself - so why is it so many women here say that men their age are immature - yet the younger ones with less life experience less responsibility and obligations have it all together and are so worldly
as for the men their own age being sedentary --- maybe these men are basically worn out from work/support family/divorce/life pressures/putting up with a womans crap for years -- as such they just don't have the energy
perhaps the younger ones are more appealing as they "will cater to your whims desires demands bullshit" for either overt or covert reasons of their own - or perhaps they just may be **** whipped doormats.
If you don't believe that guys look better in their twenties, just take a look at profiles where there's pics from several different time periods.
and then there are some that are in better shape now then they were twenty years ago
It is also more commonplace these days to be in your thirties and still not necessarily looking to find a husband type right away
so why so much lamentation in the mainstream media from women saying that there are so few men wanting to commit in the 30-40 age bracket
I simply adore women like Gena Davis and Demi Moore. At the moment they are my personal heroes because they are proving that the boundaries of age can be broken.
do you have the money of demi moore for example to purchase back your youthful looks from the surgeons knife, full time personal trainer, full time household staff, full time chef -- so that you can devote all your time in regaining youthful appearance ?
It's shameful. Women live longer then men, but men take way longer to mature.
i agree - but only in our easy modern day society - it was a lot different say up to 40 years ago
I’m sorry but that’s the sad truth. I have only met a FEW guys my age or older that were not’t total nut jobs (they truly loathed women or hated their lives) yet I’ve met 20-30 guys younger than me who had a brain and weren’t judgmental, thought life was a blast and were full of passion about what the next day was going to bring
just wait till life throws them a curve ball and they get screwed over one way or another by someone or some event -- they will quickly change as well.
maybe just maybe rather than the men being immature it may be the reverse
then again what would an immature over the hill coach potato like myself know | |
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| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/10/2007 9:25:52 AM | | I personally have always like men older, however...I'm new to the dating scene again after a long term relationship and started out dating older men, but what I find is that they are not exciting enough. Maybe it's because I've been tied down for so long and want to enjoy myself but I've started looking younger because they still have that energy for life and aren't ready to sit on the couch yet. | |
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bsg789
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Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 100 | |
| I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 12/10/2007 9:51:47 AM | You are 40 years old - and you get along with people younger than yourself - so why is it so many women here say that men their age are immature - yet the younger ones with less life experience less responsibility and obligations have it all together and are so worldly
as for the men their own age being sedentary --- maybe these men are basically worn out from work/support family/divorce/life pressures/putting up with a womans crap for years -- as such they just don't have the energy
I never stated that all men around my age are immature or are sedentary. There are immature men from all age groups. I am very busy with work and family. There are plenty of men in their late 20s and early / mid 30s that are busy with work, grad school, family, and/or other things. I might reject a man ( regardless of age ) because he has different interests or viewpoints than I do. It doesn't mean that I think he is immature or sedentary. It just means that we aren't compatible with each other. Those things have nothing to do with I often ( not always ) date younger men. Like I stated earlier, I wouldn't reject a man that is around my age or a few years older due to his age. There are some 40 yr old men that would reject me because they prefer younger women for whatever reason. There are some younger women who prefer older men. There are women in their 40s that prefer men around the same age as them. I don't complain about these things.
do you have the money of demi moore for example to purchase back your youthful looks from the surgeons knife, full time personal trainer, full time household staff, full time chef -- so that you can devote all your time in regaining youthful appearance ?
This doesn't apply to just rich women. There are plenty of middle aged women with normal jobs that are able to age gracefully and still look good with a good diet and proper exercise. | |
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