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kellum
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Joined: 1/22/2008
Msg: 52 | |
| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 2/22/2008 4:03:47 PM | | lovers that you see yourself with in the future. the one that you think will be your true love, should come before everything. if youve got to ask yourself that question, you should move on. she may not be the right person. OR you may need to grow up. friends are great, but theres nothing like the connection in an intimate relationship. keep your friends, but put your lover first. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 2/22/2008 4:09:37 PM | | Eh, I never had many friends so to be honest.. friends aren't that important in my life period. I am a bad friend anyway, when I am with a guy I tend to forget/ignore them or they forget/ignore you because they are "single" and doing "single" things. Maybe it's me, I never been good at managing both, and the friends I had were usually male and my partners also didn't feel comfortable with that. Which I respected. The whole 5 years I was with my ex, I had no friends. And since he moved here to Canada to be with me, he had no friends either as all his were in the USA. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 2/22/2008 7:25:40 PM | I assume they r two aspects in our life.Both r important.
Lover is more close to us,can accompany us 24 hours per day.Too close make each other see the other's shortcoming easily,so "lover come and go".
Friends r close too,but not as close as lover,there r alway some distance between our friends and us,that i assume is the reason why we could keep friendship forever. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 10:58:16 AM | | I believe that friends are more important than lovers. A true friend is hard to find, good romantic partners are hard to find as well. But friends stick with you through the good and bad times. Lovers leave the first sign of bad times. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 12:45:02 PM |
..."Lovers come and go but friends are forever." Do you agree with that?
I have always had friend to turn to, but not always a lover. I have many friends at any given time, yet only one lover at a time. So I suppose the statement I agree with is this:
"Lovers come and go, and so do friends, but friends stay longer."
Do you think good friends are harder to find than good romantic partners?
A good romantic partner is also a good friend to many people, yet faithful to one person. Therefore it's harder to find a good romantic partner. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 1:54:55 PM | well. i was allwasys told, to put your friends first the reason being is.
who has known u longer??
who knows you better??
who is always there when you need them, and turn too ??
who are the ones that help you??
your best friends
you get a bf, gf, and yes friends tend to get pushed to the back.... touch wood it does not happen but you blank ur mates out, and blank the calls, and stuff., and u split with ur bf....who are u there to turn too...... even tho a real friend would b there..... its always nice to place them first...... as i think u would not want to b 2nd best wen they get a partner
friends family....partner....
u can always get some one else, but u can never get a new best friend................
but i love my bf so much and i love him forever and treat my bestest mate like i do him, ther e on the one level all togther | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 2:27:00 PM | friends are definitely more important, but in saying that, they have to be the kinds of friends that are really there for you. And I found out who was there for me recently when my mom passed away. Some drove hundreds of miles to be there with me, some have disappeared entirely. So, I think that's the test either way, for a friend or significant other. I have been very sick (being diabetic) and my best friend (who is male) was there in the hospital every time. That's friendship. Not when it's fun, but when it's hard. I do expect a lot from my friends, as I would give them the same thing. I am not with anyone and haven't been for a long time, because I am not even sure what a boyfriend or significant other would give me. I think I am just at a loss as to how I feel about it. Many men have come and gone, to date me and just disappear. I don't think I trust this whole love thing, because I think people just don't give a damn about anything other than themselves. Maybe it's losing my mom, but I find I'd rather just be around friends or alone, but then I am also lonely. I did many years of dating, only to get nowhere, so to me, friends are everything (good friends), but a lover, boyfriend is worth not much.
M | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 3:35:08 PM | The problem with move in relationships is the vast amount of trust required.
Everny second TV program has a divorce in it so we have become paranoid about someone bailing out of a relationshipo and taking half the home and money with them.
The law does protect women but really does put a lot of men off living with someone.
This could explain the lack houses with so many people living alone ! | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 4:55:17 PM | Not more, not less. But, caveat: At-level but differentially important, thus, can't really use the word 'equal'.
Why?
1) a life partner should also be one of your best/closest friends
2) You gotta really define what you mean by these friends. I'm talking best friends, the ones that you can count on one hand, with fingers left over, the kind of bone-deep friendships, that are sistas-from-anotha-motha type of deal. Have already done survived, say, 15, 10 years of friendship, the ones who saw you grow up, go through your awkward stages, saw you mature, and were there through the craziest parties/memories, and are the same ones who can keep it real with you, tell you off when you need to hear it, but, you know, there's still love, and are the same ones who then are proud and happiest for your successes and achievements. Gone through life's hardships, parents' health, broken hearts, school, careers, family issues, supposedly 'irreconceivable' differences, buck-wild fights, living together, so close to possible alk poisoning cuz you strayed from them for the haut guys that you're a bit  , and they're the ones, who are livid once they finally find you, and are those who not only hold your hair back for you, but, **** at you throughout, while being the ones to shove their fingers down your throat so you puke all over their hands and clothes, cuz you 'just can't, can't have the energy to throw up'......and still manage to scramble for water for you after, and cuss you a right one the day after, with a, 'if you ever scare me like that again, I am not at fault for killing you!' ....and, somehow still there. Distances apart, for years, and know that at 3am if you call, there's no awkwardness, no formalities, you just pick up where you left off. As if it was merely yesterday. Ya, that type of friends. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 5:27:49 PM | One hundred percent of the guys I have dated on this site, have gone by the wayside. I am coming to the conclusion that dating and relatioships are NOT FOR ME. Over the years, I have dated on MATCH.COM, POF, and E-Harmony. I have dated over 47 men, from the ages of 49 to sixty years old. NONE PANNED OUT... and none are my friends.... however, in just meeting and making friends... I AM STILL FRIENDS WITH THOSE GUYS. So, I am trying NOT to have sex anymore, because as soon as I do.... POOF, they are gone. The only ones left are the friends I had before the relationship, so I would venture to say that FRIENDS ARE VERY IMPORTANT.  | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 5:38:32 PM |
Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
No not really. If I truly care for someone, be they a lover or a friend, I wouldn't choose one over another. Family yes, but that isn't part of the question.
Isn’t the ideal a friend that becomes a lover? | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 7:55:01 PM | I have a lot of people that I am friendly with and one that I call a friend. Friends are not forever. Friends come and go, the friends you have now, though you may stay in touch with them for the rest of your life, will slowly grow away as time goes on. You'll less of each other, one will move away for work, or get married.
Your lover will probably be gone sooner though, thats just the way these modern times seem to work. If you're married , and really lucky, that might last forever.
Sound depressing ? Well , think about it, make a list of all the friends you have had and see how many you are still seeing all the time. Life goes on and so do we.
Meet, laugh, love, and learn, and let nature take its course. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/19/2008 12:00:36 AM | "Friends are those people who know the words to the song in your heart, And sing them back to you when you've forgotten those words..."
-unknown author
"A real friend is someone who walks in when the rest of the world walks out..."
- unknown author
"Don't walk in front of me, I will not follow. Don't walk behind me, I will not lead. Walk beside me and be my friend."
- unknown author
...and to be honest, I believe in what these few saying's tell about true friendship. It's unconditional, unlike the love between lovers, and lasts when those lovers walk out on us. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/19/2008 2:19:32 AM | If you're not having sex with your friends, who are you having sex with, your enemies ?
In some cases that might just be true.
It's interesting how lovers tend to fit into a special category.
We tend to be afraid to share the same things with a lover that we would with a friend. As though that would lose us the lover, as though the lover was more expendable than the friend. As though lovers were all that easy to find.
Most people have many more friends than lovers and one would think the lover would be more valuable to us, but frequently that's not the case.
Logically, there should be a hierarchy of promotion, from acquaintance to friend to lover but that almost never happens.
I've always been amazed at how easily people will have sex with someone they barely know, completely passing over all their friends who would qualify. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/19/2008 2:29:52 AM | | No I dont. Lovers AND friends can come and go, staying in our lives only for a period of time. If your in a loving relationship, believe me, that relationship becomes more important and close than any friend relationship you may have. I also think good friends are easier to find then good romantic partners. Friends ask less of you. | |
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| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/19/2008 2:30:09 AM | I often come across comments on these forums along the lines of "Lovers come and go but friends are forever."
Do you agree with that? Are your friends more important important to you than a boyfriend or girlfriend (or wife or husband, for that matter)?
Do you think good friends are harder to find than good romantic partners?
I don't really believe that, as I've had friends come and go. Good friends can be just as hard to come by as compatible romantic partners sometimes.
Those comments are generally present in threads involving conflict between someone's friendship and their relationship. Some people take issue with being pressured to abandon their friends, which is personally something I'm not willing to do for anyone if I can help it. That isn't something a compatible romantic partner would ask of me.
Anyway, your partner should come first in most situations that don't require you to back down from your own morals and principles. | |
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~Kyn~
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Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 75 | |
| Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Posted: 3/19/2008 2:40:01 AM |
Do you believe friends are more important than lovers?
Am going with a husband/Long term partner here in my assessment.
Im also talking about a great status quo all round.
And my answer is friends come second.
Dont care how long Ive known them for or how long I intend to know them.
My loyalty & consideration goes with partner & children first...everything else is secondary. I expect the same from my friends also. | |
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