| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/17/2007 8:43:22 AM | A woman's financial position means nothing to me. How she came to be in that position might. That cuts both ways:
Someone coming into dire straights through heavy debt as the result of indiscriminate credit card spending indicates to me a less than mature personality, or at the very least a lack of intelligence that I would find unattractive. I really don't care that she doesn't have any money, but her actions losing it would be a clear indication that we wouldn't be compatible.
On the other side of the coin, someone coming to have a great deal of money by running sweatshops employing child labour at slave wages indicates to me this person has little or no morality. Sure, it might be nice to be pampered, but in good conscience, I couldn't accept from whence it came .
So, rich, poor, doesn't matter to me. I can take care of myself, and all I seek is someone that at least puts in the effort to do the same without exploiting anyone. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/17/2007 9:04:02 AM |
Interestingly, finances is the leading cause for divorce..... go figure.
It may be the leading cause, but in my situation, it was because someone could not keep his tongue out of other womens mouths, not to mention other body parts out of other womens body parts!
On topic...I have met men who rejected me because they said I was not equal to them in an economical way. So, for some men, it does matter. Is that similar to "size does matter???" Then yes...size does matter!!! | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/17/2007 10:38:49 AM | I thought about this thread as stood at the checkout line last night. The woman ahead of me was in a bind. She attempted to use her debit card with $60 cashback from the cashier. The woman seemed to be relatively close to my age. She was fairly well dressed and wore a lot of make-up. Her hair was obviously styled professionally.
Her transaction was declined - no funds were available. i thought, Oh well, maybe she forgot to transfer money into that account - "no biggy." Then, as I watched, she opened her wallet. To my dismay, she had a ton of plastic cards. I saw Capital one mastercard, visa, diners club, Sears and the Bay card... she had her wallet laid on the conveyor, deciding which card to use. As I said, I saw all those cards yet, I wasn't familiar with the others (didn't get the name of them).
In my opinion, I would not want that type woman in my relationship. Obviously, she has/had good rating to get all of those cards but, I sensed nothing but financial despair with her. Irrespective of the amount/balance owing on those cards, it still goes against your credit rating..... that's an unwise woman in my opinion.
As i said before, I prefer a woman who has a respect for money... that woman at the checkout reconfirms my position. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/17/2007 3:59:47 PM | Woo M I !
I think I saw a lady like that at wally mart last christmas !
She was at the check out infront of me and attempted to pay with gold master card.
She swiped her card and it said over limit . So she pulls out a small cluch purse and opened it up and out fell about 15 credit cards. I thought holly crap she must owe every store in canada . Sure she was a nice looking single lady ! But one I would surely stay away from too. And not because of her so called financial well being but more for her lack of knowing her limits! As anyone with more then 3 cards is not very financially stable no matter how much she earns !!  | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/17/2007 4:09:20 PM |
As anyone with more then 3 cards is not very financially stable no matter how much she earns !!
Omce again Richard puts his size 8's in his mouth.
I have more then three credit cards and I am very responsible! I have Amex, and Visa. I use Home Depot for home repairs, and I have Zellers and the Bay...but I dont think I have used either of those cards for 4 or 5 years! | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/17/2007 4:57:29 PM | once I was with friends on a wedding in Greece,
there was an extremelly pretty woman, actually Miss World 1996.
(not kidding.)
found out soon that she was going to get married with one Onassis guy - that means her guy had some fleets and a wealth of a few billions.
well, maybe it was mistake of my life but I remember hearing this was a turn off, and didn't put any significant effort to conquer her heart | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/17/2007 5:00:30 PM | I have read the posts and have to add my two cents..or more like a half penny! lol
I have struggled and worked damned long and hard to get where I am. I do not live in a palace and struggle as everyone else does to make ends meet. However? Having said that? I in no way, shape or form, will support a man who is not able to earn a living. And trust me, there are a lot out there. Either that or this gal can't pick her men right! As long as he has his stuff in order, has a job, and doesn't have the wolves at the door for payment, I can surely date a man like that. I think you have to at the very least, meet someone "similar" to your status? And do not misunderstand! I am not a gold digger. Furthest thing from it. I just think we need to be on similar playing fields! | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/19/2007 6:24:26 AM | A woman's financial status is highly important!! What's the point in we low-income dirtbags dating them or tricking them into marriage if we can't sponge off them or just plain rip them of?? Geez.
That's the stereotypical belief isn't it? Guess what. In real life, it just isn't that simple. If you're a real human being, you take a lot of things into account before making assumptions about anyone, male or female. Before giving them the bum's rush because of their financial or employment status, try actually listening to things like their circumstances and what their ambiton level is like, and what kind of things they are actually doing to make good. Yes, some people are "bums", but not all that are at a low financial ebb are that way. I know I can empathize entirely with people that have gone through something like a post-divorce bankruptcy. People treat you like garbage. My new wife and I met and dated without even discussing financial status for a very long time. We just knew what was really important, and were able to work the rest out honestly and openly between us. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/19/2007 12:00:57 PM | it's true - money doesn't make the man/woman BUT it does pay the bills, feed the bellies and cloth the children and i respect that.
what i do not respect is being asked "how much do you make" on week number 2 of a relationship.
time and a place. time and a place.
(side note: no, alfino didn't ask me this! LOL)
if you are co-habitating or making large purchases together, it only makes sense to get a general understanding (if not full understanding) of the other persons 'financial obligations.
would i refuse a date based on where a man works? never.
would i refuse a date with someone with no employment and no drive to get employment? more than likely. not because i don't want to support them, more because their personality type is not what i seek in a potential mate. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/19/2007 9:00:13 PM | Read enough of this thread to see the two sides. Have to give my perspective.
Money will come and go for some people, maybe saved and built for some. Maybe barely enough to scratch by for others, maybe spent aimlessly for some. But, what will money bring you?
I am a big believer in all someone needs is food, water, shelter and love. Everything else is not of much importance.
I rather be with a woman that shops through her heart, then with her mind. I rather be with someone that screws up once in awhile. Sounds like a very boring life to be with someone that is so structured. Save money for smiles in the future, spend for the immediate ones. Life is about people and personlity and who is rich is about perspective. Appreciate what you have and enjoy the people around you, cause in the end that is all that will matter. Not that you have a castle instead of a house, not that you have 1million saved instead of 1 thousand. I rather leave my son with all those smiles and a life filled with spontanious memorries, then with a milion dollars and a certain anal structure built within them.
I do believe most of everyone's greatest memorries have been moments where nothign is around but two people and the sky. When looking for a possible mate look for someone that will make those moments turn into a one long moment of passion, fun and love. To base that on finances makes me think someone is way out of touch with their heart. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/19/2007 10:25:19 PM | I rather leave my son with all those smiles and a life filled with spontanious memorries, then with a milion dollars and a certain anal structure built within them
Why not leave your son with both?
Saving money and respecting the value of a dollar is not indicative of a "structured" life. It's indicative of someone with discipline, responsibility and accountability.
Too often i hear people claim they have the right to party. However, those same people are bumming smokes because they can't afford it; they are jumping from apartment to apartment; they have a very unstable existence..... it's those who disguise their lack of discipline with rhetoric like "love is most important", who mooch and suck the life out of every one around them.......I don't need those type people in my life.
I'll take someone who respects money and practises a reasonable amount of fiscal discipline. It's not about what you make, it's about how you spend it....."Budget" . Afterall, you are setting an example for your kids as they turn into adults | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/20/2007 2:50:06 AM | Just saying My I. Would never want to leave my son with the thought that money is more important than love and what he finds out there in that aspect, should be based on love and should have nothing to do with their wallet.
For me, I rather him screw up once and awhile, then be a little too anal. Which too much structure ends up doing to people. Most people can`t pull off both very well, but is a great thing when they can | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/20/2007 7:26:54 PM |
Many men don't realize that women have pride when it comes to being self sufficient and able to support themselves, specially if they are older independent women. The two sexes really are not that different!
Like many men, we can hide how good/bad our financial situation really is. Like men we can also look like we are better off than we truly are (women are probably better at doing this than men). Many single moms are living well below the poverty line, but most people have no idea of that. Many do it so well that they can often even look like they are not only doing fine, but very well.
If you have a good job, security, etc.. what would you expect her to be able to bring to the table, specially if she had a child?
My view on everything is that both parties need to bring similar stuff to the relationship. It may not be money, one may bring job stability, the other may bring income, one may bring knowledge to work with money, the other may bring the means of getting it..... Just how important is economics to you in a potential long term relationship???? At what point do you feel it is best to even discuss yours/their financial situation?
Thanks for your input.
I don't think you can "hide" your financial situation for long....
Unless you've got a $100,000 line of credit...any astute observer can tell if your in financial trouble...
Lots of phone calls at homes..bills everywhere...empty refrigerator...
Women that don't have a wide range of clothes and jewelry are a sure sign...
While I would date a woman that was having financial problems that she was working on...I wouldn't date or get serious w/ a woman that always had financial issues...
To me...that's a sign of deeper personal issues...and that's something I'm looking to avoid. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/20/2007 7:46:07 PM | Well I am not referring to women, or men, hiding their financial situation by any means, just how people look at the general financial differences that can and do occur between two people. I also think that you should have a basic idea of what a person is like financially, but as for what they actually have in possessions, bank, etc... That is no ones business unless they are looking at getting ready to set up a home.
As for women who don't have a wide range of clothes and jewelry.... Sorry, you have me lost on that one!! I don't have either and it has nothing to do with being able to, or not being able to, afford them. Many of us really could care less about those kinds of things!!
The issue here is just if men (or people in general) place a whole lot on general finances. I have certainly enjoyed reading everyone's input on it. I agree completely, with most of the comments here. It should not be what a person does, or does not have, but the responsibility of what they do, and don't do, with it! I personally do not expect a potential partner to HAVE things or money, BUT I do need to see that he is stable in his employment and that he is secure in his life. I could not consider someone who just blows everything on nothing, but he doesnt have to have things!!! To me, he needs to have the potential of us being able to make a stable financial future together! | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/20/2007 7:54:54 PM |
As for women who don't have a wide range of clothes and jewelry.... Sorry, you have me lost on that one!! I don't have either and it has nothing to do with being able to, or not being able to, afford them. Many of us really could care less about those kinds of things!!
Women like clothes...women like jewelry...
While there are ,of course,exceptions...they are very few...
That would explain the size and quantity of clothing stores for women
A women w/ a insufficient supply of clothes (i.e. wears the same outfits a LOT) is usually having financial issues....
And while my grandfather is the one that told me this 35 years ago..it still remains true...I can spot a broke woman by a lack of jewelry (Unless she has a job where she can't wear it) | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/20/2007 8:17:40 PM |
I'll take someone who respects money and practises a reasonable amount of fiscal discipline. It's not about what you make, it's about how you spend it....."Budget" . Afterall, you are setting an example for your kids as they turn into adults
Thanks for that MI! Sheesh! Being dependable and taking care of your budget makes you a gold digger only interested in what a man can bring to the table financially? | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/21/2007 6:47:05 AM |
A women w/ a insufficient supply of clothes (i.e. wears the same outfits a LOT) is usually having financial issues.... I wouldn't bet the farm on that one pal! Ever heard the old nag about the rich didn't get richer by spending their money? Some of the stingiest people I've met in my life so far have had more money than most people will see in a lifetime. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/21/2007 8:26:53 AM |
I wouldn't bet the farm on that one pal! Ever heard the old nag about the rich didn't get richer by spending their money? Some of the stingiest people I've met in my life so far have had more money than most people will see in a lifetime.
That's true...
But it's also the exception.....
Women are a little too "catty" though,to make that a comfortable position for most women. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/21/2007 9:07:16 AM |
Women like clothes...women like jewelry...
While there are ,of course, exceptions...they are very few...
That would explain the size and quantity of clothing stores for women
A women w/ a insufficient supply of clothes (i.e. wears the same outfits a LOT) is usually having financial issues....
Well I guess the fact that all I the jewelry I tend to wear is a $4 ring and I combine it with my limited selection of $20 jeans and t-shirts makes me a very broke person. I get my hair cut about 4 times a year, so I am not very stylish either. I guess I am a very poor person in your books right??? I don't like to wear jewelry, my hair gets caught in necklaces, I forget my earrings all the time and I hate many rings on my fingers.........
Funny thing is that what prompted me to start this thread was the fact that the guy I was seeing was upset about being viewed as a 'gold digger'. Where in reality, I am still just a typical, struggling, single mom trying to make ends meet. BUT I am by no means poor, nor do I have any financial issues!!! I own my own home (I still have to pay on it and out of a very linted income), a relatively new truck, etc.... But by the standards you have set here, I am extremely poor and the kind of women to stay away from!!
Funny how we all have such different perceptions of people and the world in general!! | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/21/2007 5:31:15 PM | I cannot believe that someone actually said, and believes, if a woman is not wearing jewelry it is because she is in financial difficulty. I don't care for a lot of jewelry. I have a half dozen pair of earrings and wear one pair 99% of the time, and a birthstone ring I rarely wear.
I don't wear or desire furs - I can only wonder what message THAT sends..  | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/21/2007 6:22:27 PM |
I cannot believe that someone actually said, and believes, if a woman is not wearing jewelry it is because she is in financial difficulty
Does this theory apply at nude resorts?
I'm guessing that person also believes nude people are very poor with their finances. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/21/2007 7:02:12 PM | Hey now with all those cards and all those stores your paying around 48% interest rates.
And just think all those stores all accept visa !LOL
As a stable income is not based on how good you can afford to pay back credit card payments !LOL
A stable income is using it wisely . And if anyone pays out more then they earn per week your over the safe budget line !! And that could bring trouble.
But as for richards feet their not that small but then you wouldn't know would you !LOL
Now back on topic it would not matter to me how much a woman earns or what she may have to me . But I would be concerned if she was deeply in debt and yes that would make me wonder if she's dating matterial . | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/21/2007 7:19:31 PM | Jewelry and clothes...I need to add my 2 cents too!
Not big on jewelry...love my simple earrings and have something for bigger occasions. As for clothes, have my favourites and wear them out. Then buy more.
You see my Mom was raised poor. I was taught to live frugally and still do. Not as extreme as her as I do spoil myself from time to time. Rather spend my money on my kids-- for sports related things, family outings, etc.
Not big on ME is what a lot of women have been raised to be--- selfless. Jewelry and clothes have nothing to do with it.
Look around my house you will see plenty of games on the main floor so the kids and I can enjoy our time together. Family videos as well. A basket of fresh fruit. Bikes for all the kids etc...
In the end, we each decide what we want to spend our money on. I suggest you re-evaluate that one.
PS My Venture van is a 1999....not a lot of mileage and works great! Haven't replaced that either....why? Not trying to keep up with the neighbours. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/21/2007 7:38:44 PM | I've had some verbal comfirmation this evening that my stance on this has been misinterpretted, so I'd like to elaborate if I might.
Having a number of credit cards is not a measure of financial irresponsibility. I currently have 4 and have has as many as 5. However, I haven't carried a balance in probably 10 years. Credit is not a bad thing, but how you (ab)use it might be. If you're using it to keep ahead of your expenses or to cover emergencies, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Using it to buy strappy shoes and fancy purses when you don't have the cash to cover it, then you go into debt because of your own avarice, that is patently immature. When you buy things you don't need when you don't have enough cash to cover necessities, then cry about being in debt, I'll point and laugh at you without the slightest bit of pity.
It's called responsibility, and if by your actions you demonstrate that you don't know what that means, I don't want anything to do with you. If you can't pay for necessities out of no fault of your own, I'll go so far as to help you. If you just throw your money away, that's your problem, and good luck with that. | |
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