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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/16/2007 12:31:14 PM | | And how about some basic english and grammer lessons for you? | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/16/2007 2:59:50 PM | Go back and count how many things YOU have said are wrong for other people to do think or hold as a view just in this thread alone and you disprove your own statement
if you are referring to that bantor between mojo and myself, maybe YOU should go back and read,,, i didnt say anything but the same thing, repeatedly! | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/16/2007 6:30:38 PM | wow!
meal ticket, huh?
I really dont know what to say about all of that. We shall have to talk about this subject later | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/16/2007 8:18:47 PM | BUT.... she also should not go after dude for child support or visitation... since she is choosing to have a baby he has said he doesn't want....
bullsh!t.....how about this??? after delivering the baby she should drop the baby off on his doorstep and then disappear. Then after 9 months he can decide to keep or get rid of the baby.
I'm most definitely Pro-Choice but I have complete understanding for anyone who would not/could not choose to have an abortion. And if a man inpregnates a woman who is anti-abortion--oh well, that's how the cookie crumbles, now deal with it.
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 4:45:49 AM |
if you are referring to that bantor between mojo and myself, maybe YOU should go back and read,,, i didnt say anything but the same thing, repeatedly!
Well I wouldnt limit it to JUST that lol, pretty much every response to any view you dont agree with would be more acurate really
bullsh!t.....how about this??? after delivering the baby she should drop the baby off on his doorstep and then disappear. Then after 9 months he can decide to keep or get rid of the baby.
And how many women dya reckon would ALSO get rid of it if THEY had to do that? So thats not really a "man" thing is it?
But its NOT a baby when abortion is being discussed is it??????? Thats called "adoption",,, different topic entirely
I'm most definitely Pro-Choice but I have complete understanding for anyone who would not/could not choose to have an abortion. And if a man inpregnates a woman who is anti-abortion--oh well, that's how the cookie crumbles, now deal with it.
Be a bit hard not to if youre "pro choice" wouldnt it? The word CHOICE sort of implies that to begin with
Perhaps the way forward is for a pre-sex to be signed, where a woman states if she wants a child, whether she is against abortion or for it, and whether her contraception is up to date, the bloke would then sign to signify similar etc
Then if someone later turns out to be lying they are in breach of their agreement and any contracts are null and void
As the problem here is women who DO want a child DO have the capacity to lie about what they want, which is tantamount to fraud rather than a mere "accident" when financial liability is part of the deal | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 5:50:52 AM | if you are referring to that bantor between mojo and myself, maybe YOU should go back and read,,, i didnt say anything but the same thing, repeatedly!
Well I wouldnt limit it to JUST that lol, pretty much every response to any view you dont agree with would be more acurate really
so in the world according to you,, because I oppose a point, or dont completely agree with it then I should not be allowed to express that!
geee, now thats rather self appointing on your part now isnt it?
and for the " i have lost count how many times" and for the remedial sect,,,,
not agreeing with abortion as a choice is one thing, it goes beyond just an opinion when, because of your opposition to it, you then refer to those who do chose it as murderers. thats where imposing ones value onto another comes into play. but again, you would have to be able to think a little deeper than the superficial to understand that. | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 6:16:14 AM | post # 330
Perhaps the way forward is for a pre-sex to be signed, where a woman states if she wants a child, whether she is against abortion or for it, and whether her contraception is up to date, the bloke would then sign to signify similar etc
Then if someone later turns out to be lying they are in breach of their agreement and any contracts are null and void.
And perhaps the way forward is exactly as I've tried to say so many times before....if a man and a woman would only spend a little bit more time finding out about each other BEFORE they jump in the sack, all of this could be avoided in the first place!
I'm pro choice and I myself had a tubal ligation when I was just 21 years old, so this doesn't affect me personally. I've also had my share of crazy adventures when I was younger. And yes, I've even had *gasp* my share of one night stands!!! But I also was very aware of the consequences of my actions and I took FULL responsibility for my decisions!! Meaning that if I jumped in the sack with someone I barely knew, I had NO right to cry victim the next day if I found out he had lied about his marital status or his intents or WHATEVER!! I could be disappointed perhaps, and I could certainly be disgusted with the situation, but I had no one to blame but MYSELF for my OWN stupidity!!!
But here on POF, we have some male posters who start thread after thread to try and convince all women that there is something WRONG with them if they don't "put out" on the first date!!!!!!! According to them, after a half dozen emails and a few phone calls and a half hour first meet, you should now know each other enough to have sex on that first official date, and if you don't, they accuse you of being controlling, depressed, lying, manipulative, a prude, frigid, addled, afraid ....and on and on it goes!!
Now I'm supposed to believe that these same men got "tricked" into a pregnancy they didn't want or desire?? How the hell can they possibly know that the woman isn't lying about being on the pill?? How do they know how she would react if the condom should break?? Is this something they even took the time to discuss? Is she pro life....pro choice....what does she think of the morning after pill?? Would this be an option for her??
Again, this is something ANY responsible parent teaches their children from a very early age.....every action carries a consequence , there are NO exceptions. You can philosophise and politicalize it all you want until the cows come home....it will never change the simple fact that we are ALL responsible for own own actions. Period. End of story. Women can and do get pregnant. Men don't. And unless we start forcing women into having abortions against their wishes, the reality is that if the woman you were so anxious to jump in the sack with did get pregnant, you are fully responsible for making it happen. And as unfair as it may seem to some, it is her body and no one but her can decides what's best for her. Why is that so hard to understand?? Seriously, I honestly don't get it! There is NO other alternative.....unless of course you're talking "forcible" abortion .....and no civilized society would even dare comptemplate such a thing!! So what is the point of all this crazy talk?? And where is the compassion for the child? How can a man even think of abandoning his own flesh and blood, no matter what the circumstances of his conception were?? Men are the first one to laugh at the Maury Povich welfare mothers.....are they forgetting that it is men who impregnated these women?? For every welfare mother out there, there is an irresponsible and deadbeat father who willingly slept with her.....okay?? 
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 6:28:41 AM |
I honestly don't get it! There is NO other alternative.....unless of course you're talking "forcible" abortion .....and no civilized society would even dare comptemplate such a thing!!
I dont think, although I COULD be wrong that a single (or married lol) person has said an abortion should be enforced
But, if you want to talk about EQUAL responsibility for the consequences of having sex, then banning abortion is the only answer so BOTH genders HAVE to face the responsibility equally is it not?
But we have a get out clause for women who want to shag about at their whim and NOT face any responsibility for doing so, its called abortion. As I dont agree a man should be able to directly influence if a woman aborts but DO think greater fairness should be a decent aim men cant have the SAME get out clause for obvious reasons
So, if its FAIR for a woman to be able to, if she wishes, take NO responsibility whatsoever for the consequences of her promiscuity it follows that a FAIR and EQUAL situation would be, where the man also was ONLY agreeing to sex, and nothing more (as is the case with most women who then abort) as similar as possible chance of sidestepping be available. Which is limited obviously by who has the womb
So a financial and physical "aborting" from the foetus is the only real option left
But where people try to say a "man" knows the risks and shouls HAVE to face the responsibility, what about the woman? Shouldnt that equally apply to her? Course it should
She ALSO knows the risks, she ALSO STILL chooses to have sex so it follows she shouls ALSO have NO choice but to face up to HER responsibilities of the ensuing pregnancy is one occurs
Thats about as fair as we CAN get when viewing both genders, but as we are lucky enough to have the ability for women to CHOOSE, it would seem only fair men should have some degree of choice about their lives too
This does however only really relate to where its a one night thing or casual dalliance, actual relationships arent quite the same thing | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 7:04:28 AM | You keep bringing up this "fair" issue....are you perhaps suffering from a gender identity crisis?? We've all heard of penis envy
but this is ridiculous!!
It's like you can't accept the fact that it is WOMEN who get pregnant, and NOT men!! Fair or not, this is the way it IS!!!
Seriously, is it fair that I can't just whip mine out and pee standing up behind a tree? Is it fair that I bloat and bleed each month
for approximately 40 years of my life? Is it fair than on average, men are physically stronger than women?? Is LIFE fair??
What the hell has "fair" got to do with anything??!!?
It is the way it is and I don't see things changing anytime soon...do you?
I suggest taking it up with management if you don't feel it was "fair" that it was women who were the ones chosen to get
pregnant and give birth....sheesh!
This is almost surreal and as evidenced by your last post, completely pointless.
But whatever floats your boat:)
\/ EDIT:
Why don't you give it up already? Seriously, your analogies are ridiculous and don't even make sense! Comparing slavery to simple human biology is the craziest thing I've heard...well at least today:)
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 7:11:53 AM | So by that analogy then you think we should still have slavery JUST because we "could" enslave blacks?
After all, why as a society should we have bothered to pursue "fairness" if god couldnt be bothered to make blacks able to stop themselves from being enslavesd?
Doesnt really work does it? | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 8:45:45 AM | A (online) friend of mine found herself in a similar situation and discussed it with me. This presented a very difficult situation for me ethically, because of my ethical beliefs and also my faith.
An unplanned pregnancy is a difficult moral issue, particularly when the responses to it are discussed. What it comes down to in the end though, is the person deciding on the basis of their own conscience, reason and emotion, what is the best course of action to take. This is basically what I told my friend; to carefully examine the possibilities open to them in the situation, weigh them as carefully as possible, and then make a decision according to conscience.
Your friend will ultimately have to make up her own mind on what course of action to take, but whatever it is, it is going to have consequences that will remain with her for a very long time, whatever one she makes. | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 8:47:21 AM | So, if its FAIR for a woman to be able to, if she wishes, take NO responsibility whatsoever for the consequences of her promiscuity it follows that a FAIR and EQUAL situation would be, where the man also was ONLY agreeing to sex, and nothing more (as is the case with most women who then abort) as similar as possible chance of sidestepping be available. Which is limited obviously by who has the womb
its really interesting how you can pick up on what ppl are actually feeling just by the words and phrases they use to express a feeling.
in this notation, you will see how when the woman is referred to its in the negative " her promescuity". when in the latter portion you see when the male is referred to he was "ONLY agreeing to sex"
now, when you read for superficial content you see how the male forgets there are consequences to actions. in this specific, the consequence accepted was that he knew that if conception occurred he was not going to have much if any say about how far the pregnancy would be carried.
when a person freely engages in any activity, they assume all consequences and liabilities associated with, and which may be, a result of those actions. | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 1:05:00 PM | | Oh come on. We all know she should have the abortion. After all, it's only a rat until it's born and no one should have trouble killing a rat. Or maybe it's a lizard. Not a baby until it's born, bottled feed and a popped in its diaper ( Then it's a baby by golly). | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/17/2007 8:46:25 PM | LIFE IS NOT FAIR!!!
Apparently some folks here don't comprehend that reality.
Women get pregnant, women carry babies in their womb, therefore women utlimately get the final say about carrying a baby to term.
A man can disappear and never have contact with the baby, a woman can't.
I doubt very seriously there is an epidemic of women having abortions against the wishes of the father.
But there is an epidemic of deadbeat and absentee fathers. There is an epidemic of men who come up with bullsh!t stories about how there were "tricked" or lied to. | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/18/2007 5:48:39 AM | But there is an epidemic of deadbeat and absentee fathers. There is an epidemic of men who come up with bullsh!t stories about how there were "tricked" or lied to.
or how all they were agreeing to was sex. or " i didnt want to be a father"... guess ya should of thought about that before ya had the sex.
or heres one of my fav's
" i used a condom"... again,, like that matters.
other than surgical sterilization,, BIRTH CONTROL FAILS!
this isnt about, "you didnt plan on it" what you really didnt do is "plan not to". you didnt take absolutely every precaution you could to ensure that YOU were not going to be makin a baby. | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/18/2007 8:22:28 AM | Well when
"but I didnt want to be a mother" means they ALSO have to still have the child against their wishes then it would become a moot and fair point
Its quite comical that people bang on and on about the bloke "knowing" a baby might happen that he should have thought about that BEFORE having sex and not bothered if having a child wasnt something he wanted.......
AND then conveniently ommit to notice that fact where the woman is concerned who (We would assume) should have been AS aware of the fact or seeing as she is the one with the womb MORE aware of the likelyhood and ramifications before she ALSO chose to have sex.
So why should either sex be allowed to shirk that "responsibility"? As you really cant get ANY fairer than that if you tried | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/18/2007 9:51:29 AM | Its quite comical that people bang on and on about the bloke "knowing" a baby might happen that he should have thought about that BEFORE having sex and not bothered if having a child wasnt something he wanted.......
yup, cuz thats the same bloke whining about child maintenance payments etc.
its a bit more difficult for the woman to walk away,, wherever she walks, the baby is with her, either in the womb or in the pram. (working under the presumption that neither abortion or adoption was chosen) | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/18/2007 3:24:21 PM | [""Perhaps the way forward is for a pre-sex to be signed, where a woman states if she wants a child, whether she is against abortion or for it, and whether her contraception is up to date, the bloke would then sign to signify similar etc"]
Can't see how this would work seen as how many men (and women) who opt for abortion initially are all for having a child until the womans belly starts to swell and the reality hits home and the fear kicks in! Most abortions are done out of irrationality and even women who were against abortion find themselves considering it once a pregnancy becomes visible and real to them. Also, a womans contraception being up to date is irrelivant as it is a two way street and what happens to the women who cannot use any form of contraception? Or the ones who can only use condoms or femidoms? Sure they should state this in the "agreement" but then if the contraception fails, as can happen, how can anybody be to blame for it? I take it from that statement you think men shouldn't be responsible for contraception? What happens to couples who state in the agreement they do not want a child, both change their mind and then once the woman becomes pregnant one of them panics, changes their mind again and aborts?
To an extent i do agree, if an abortion was banned it would be fair, both parties would have to face their responsibility whether they liked it or not! However, this won't stop women having abortions if they really want them, it will just mean women will risk their lives, fertility and health seeking out illegal, backstreet abortions and rogue medical persons will capitalise on this trade! Not exactly a desirable outcome for either party!
I think it would be sensible to apply a law to married couples when it comes to pregnancy as each have a legal obligation to one another when they marry, but i can't see it happening anytime soon! | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/18/2007 3:31:42 PM | | I would deffinatly keep it, it is my body it is my choice......If he didn't want a kid he should have been a little more resposible | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/18/2007 4:29:27 PM | | It is her choice if she cant feed the baby she has every right to get support then it is about THE BABY not anyting else. I agree i am against abortion even if i was conceived on a one night stand. It is ABOUT THE BABY nothing else. | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/18/2007 7:55:00 PM |
"but I didnt want to be a mother" means they ALSO have to still have the child against their wishes then it would become a moot and fair point
Many, many, many, many women have had children even though they didn't want to be a mother. Women can't walk away from the pregnancy like a man can. | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/19/2007 10:26:43 AM | well well well .. what would she have done if there was no such things as havin an abortations . everyone has ther eown thoughts on these kind of things . but if he is man enough to slepp with her and he should be man enough to step up and be a real man to take care of this unborn child. it take two to tangle and not only that she didn;t make this child by herself . the only way that i believe in things kind of things if you been raped and became PG .. becoz when you look at the child it well huant you for the rest of u life and bring back bad memories .. ..
there is so much med's out there to stop havin unwanted PG's . | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/19/2007 11:56:44 AM | meh its just a baby .. sell it on the black market!! theres a idea | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 11/19/2007 12:36:58 PM | [meh its just a baby .. sell it on the black market!! ]
lol..yes yes its so true and there so ugly..who could fall in love with something so ugly???ewww..black market could use it for some special occasions.lol | |
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| she got pregnant!
Posted: 12/2/2007 10:37:12 AM | | wow.. I read the first post and cant understand how someone has no shame in letting the world know that they have no grasp on language. Is it attractive to show ignorance? | |
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