| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 1:47:09 AM | | Darlin' don't worry about people acting like little boys and throwning temper tantrums when they don't get what they want... Let them have their mamma drama for someone else... You seem nice and pretty... Just fish and just block the person after telling them to get a life and leave it at that.. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 1:52:11 AM | After 'too many' Yrs in dis Zoo/Swamp?
NO : is not 'common'
(most will Not send you an 'angry' mssg - if you give Polite "Thanks fer writin...No Thanx")
YES : tis the 'Decent/Proper' thing to do (reply to All mssgs - unless Creeepy/porn/etc)
*Finally*
NO! : the folks who Do/Are sending Mean , Nasty mssgs? NOT
*ENEMIES*
very very Simple to just Delete, BLOCK , Fuggetaboutit
AlWays be Ever ~CAREful~ to...Never Give personal Information, You will Be just Fine OP
*Good Luck* , ~Happy~ 'fishin' (ewwwww, i HATE the 'fish' references)
NM
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 4:33:45 AM | | Say nothing. Don't respond. Everyone knows what that means. People who demand a letdown email are just looking for ways to get their hooks into you emotionally. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 7:35:14 AM | | When you get an angry responce,just I guess say "my intuition was correct again.You proved to me why,I'm not interested."Then block. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 8:02:09 AM |
It seems that now, anytime a man hits on me, and I don't reply, or do reply an am kind in telling them I am just not interested, I make a new enemy. ... So, I'm wondering, why is it like this? Why are people SO angry and hostile when it comes to rejection??
The response you get is the meaning of your communication - to the other person.
Is there any safe way to let them down, that won't result in hate mail, and a block??
No.
I'd say men are rather tired of all the women who advertise "I want a date/man/bf...", but who when approached respond with "...but you don't qualify". You're just collateral damage. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 8:28:43 AM | I've received hate mail for the testamonials other people wrote about me! Some people feel inadequate, or challenged, and react negativley to any type of rejection, real or perceived. You are in a minority by responding to all of your emails...I have been told by some guys that women who respond to query mails are in the minority here...but if you feel you should respond, you might look at the language of the message you're sending... | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 8:35:36 AM | | OP - Go get Cyrano de Bergerac - the older b&w version with José Ferrer - and listen to the monologue about making friends & enemies, about 25 minutes or so into the movie. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 8:44:18 AM | Ive received hateful emails, nasty messages some from people in the forums and to that I say Bite me, and what if I remove the Kiss my part from my a$$, Im not here to be popular and I couldn't give a rats a$$ who hates me, I just laugh at them , they spend time spewing out calumnious messages, thinking its going to hurt my feelings????
To that I laugh and say I wipe my a$$ with your feelings.
OP you have to realize if they spend the time to send you hateful messages, they must think you're the cat's meow. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 11:08:39 AM | OP - I agree with dashriprock...they will actually forget the fact they even sent you an email almost as quickly as you determined there was no interest on your part.
if you get an email from someone you really are not interested in the best way to handle is just do not reply.
the thing I have hear from people I have talked with on this site is many are very insecure and don't handle rejection very well | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 3:56:25 PM | "I'd say men are rather tired of all the women who advertise "I want a date/man/bf...", but who when approached respond with "...but you don't qualify". You're just collateral damage."
life_of_leisure ...
Sorry. But I do have deal breakers... like EVERYONE ELSE, including YOU. If a man is nice, and cute, but he does drugs, is on house arrest, lives in his parents basement, doesn't want a family, or is a pervert... you are RIGHT, he doesn't qualify.
What is with some of you men? Why so mean and bitter? We all get rejected... get over it. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 4:13:30 PM |
People who demand a letdown email are just looking for ways to get their hooks into you emotionally.
Or to prolong the contact.. even if it's bad? | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 7:19:53 PM | | Don't feel bad about it. I make enemies every time I open my mouth, or touch a keyboard for that matter. The problem is that people are ignorant. They feel that they are so important that anyone who ignores or (gasp) contradicts them in any way is trying to insult them directly. If someone reacts so badly to an unanswered email, it's usually because they're a sad, self indulgent (and/or sexually frustated) little insect who isn't worth the time and oxygen required for you to explain yourself. I applaud your actions. Because, any stranger who treats you like you've described probably considers you their inferior. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 7:30:11 PM | not at all,all it says is... YOU make the time,the plce,the season for your own reasons.
You should add *Beware* I roar,I AM woman and I roar,melt,tease and Know when too please...
Your just Not of My pleasing ;)
either that or tell them ,,, You have to ask Your Dad! | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 7:53:10 PM | | I find it scarily easy to go into borderline disorder mode, and that scares even the psychos away. Evoke that black hole so hard that the most destitute guy wants nothing to do with me. Strangely the few guys not put off by this mode are actually quite special and worth knowing. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 9:56:37 PM | If I don't get a response, I don't really "go off" on them, but I would probably wait a while (as most dating advice people tell you) and "follow-up" with a 2nd email, because sometimes you might get overlooked.
I would probably add a little something to it, as to "not to miss out on a great opportunity to meet a great guy!"
What's kind of unusual, as I live in a small rural area, and sometimes these single ladies recently move here from the big city (probbaly because they want to be closer to family or things didn't work out in the big city) they realize, there's no single people that they are meeting livein in the area, so they use the internet...and even on the internet, not many single guys show up in their small town.
Anyhow, even small town women turn down guys....and sometimes I feel an obligation to say, "Hey, I'm pretty much the best you can do...educated, have all 32 of my teeth, stable, and no baggage.....if that isn't good enough, your better off moving back to the big city. LOL, because that's where all the pretty boys are." | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/17/2007 9:57:31 PM | sparkinthedark, don't worry about them.
Too many insecure men on these dating sites. Makes me mad when a guy can't take a simple rejection like a man. So he goes off on the girl and that's one less possible decent woman on these dating sites.
Just ignore the BS. If these guys want to be crybaby little boys then they can wake up one day and wonder why they are alone.
Your "Thanks" message is more than enough. I send one email and no reply, I take it as she's not interested. If I got a message like you sent, I'd probably thank you for the honesty and wish you luck in finding the right guy for you.
Don't let the children get to you. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 12:51:17 AM | | The net seems to cause more false courage than too many beers. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 1:27:48 AM | | Don't worry about it. Sometimes i see a profile with a pretty woman, I really think we could click and get turned down. I might get angry or frustrated for a women... but then its on to the next message... | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 1:37:27 AM | It's just the gentle art of making enemies.........
Some will take you're most sincere response,and twist it around to try to make you
feel guilty for declining their offer.Or whatever they sent to you hoping for a good
response! | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 2:14:14 AM | | This topic has been done many times before. IMO, the best practical policy, when all dimensions of the issue reply/not reply are all analysed, compiled and evaluated, is not to reply, unless interested. Unfortunately, it seems many people are looking for a reason to communicate one way or another, and a not interested reply, no matter how phrased, will invoke a new mail from those people. So, whereas manner would say reply even if not interested, real life says, reply only when interested (I call this "NYC urban survival etiquette", lol, I think it applies to the streets of most metro cities today and to online contacts) | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 4:08:28 AM | Anal-retentive people eventually get full and explode!!!
Like others have said, the block button is your friend.
Also remember ‘Accoona matata’ | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 7:05:46 AM |
Or to prolong the contact.. even if it's bad?
Yes. It's drama addiction. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 7:11:57 AM | | Stop turning them down. It's that simple. You see an e-mail. You don't like them. Delete. End of story. You see someone you like. Respond. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 7:22:17 AM | It has nothing to do with your reply, it has everything to do with the fact that you seem to be pretty astute at dodging bullets.
Any guy that would flame you for not being interested in him is just proving why he is not worth the time and effort in getting to know. He's proving to you how absolutely right you are in recognizing you do not have an attraction to him.
Every time you get a hateful message, close your eyes and say a prayer of thanks that you did not get mixed up with such a loser, because that is exactly what that type of a guy is. | |
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| Making Enemies...
Posted: 12/18/2007 10:37:23 AM | ya know, there is a reason why they're still single  | |
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