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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 4:31:35 PM |
I think many women mistake what they think was a player with a man who just found she wasn't what he was looking for after they have had sex so he moved on.
Genuine feeling or not...it somehow wouldn't make a woman feeling any better that she failed the "sex" test, ( in fact, it's worse) speaking of which..isn't it a double standard to say you don't want to be "tested" by women, when really you are doing the same thing? Just about a different issue?
I also notice, when a man disagrees with you, you are much more polite in your responses...just an observation...
And also, just as a point..did you notice the post below yours?..lol.. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 4:39:46 PM | Kazot wrote: A person would have to be an idiot
or a glutton for punishment if they didn't know
enough about the person they were going to meet
if they were interested in having sex with them or not.
I might not make a decision until after many dates.
Kazot wrote: Many men feel a closer and more emotional
bond to non-family female after he has sex with her than
other women who he has not been intimate with.
Could be, but although a woman can get lucky and not screw
things up by performing the relationship sequence out of order,
there is nothing for her to gain, and a lot to lose.
chuckyB51 wrote: I'm not going to say "no" to sex, but I don't
see myself having a long term relationship with a woman that
opens her legs so easily.
Have you considered only having sex with women who are picky? | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 5:03:08 PM | ..isn't it a double standard to say you don't want to be "tested" by women, when really you are doing the same thing? Just about a different issue?
I don't think it is a double standard.
Buidling a relationship is finding compatability from the very begining until such a time as the it becomes an "item". When you find an incompatability that will not allow a viable relationship why would you want to continue?
When someone implements an artificial rule and sees it as test of the other persons worth then they will probably do the same in the relationship later on.
I also notice, when a man disagrees with you, you are much more polite in your responses...just an observation...
It has nothing to do with gender and everthing to do with tone and presentation.
If a female had presented her self in the same manner I would have responded in the same manner.
And also, just as a point..did you notice the post below yours?..lol..
Of course I did. there are exceptions and differing opinion on this subject.
Do you need me to go back and present you with posts that contradict your opinion before you believe or accept they exist?
This is one of those tone and presentation things I was telling you about.
Could be, but although a woman can get lucky and not screw things up by performing the relationship sequence out of order, there is nothing for her to gain, and a lot to lose.
There is a sequence that has to be followed? I doubt that the multitude of people who have not followed this so called sequence are not going to break off their successful relationships over it. I know I'm not.
I am curious what this mysterious thing is she stands to lose that her companion and cohort who was also involved in the act doesn't also stand to loose?
Of course prolonging a non viable relationship by arbitrarily denying intimacy because of some special rule or sequence step pretty much assures time, effort and emotional invest ment is garrantied to be lost when they find it just isn't going to work. And she will definately loose a potential match if he percieves this preconcieved sequence as controling, manipulative, a sign of low libido or repression.
I will ask again, what are you basing your conclusion on?
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 5:09:52 PM | *laughing* who ARE you people?
withold sex to assure the chances of a LTR?
use a womans sexual willingness early in a relationship to eliminate her as a possible LTR candidate?
"performing the relationship sequence out of order..." ??
these 'techniques' treat sex a currency...a tool to (supposedly) assure ones agenda is fullfilled. .. yeah... good luck with that.
when do i have sex?
when i am passionatly, sexually attracted to the person...which is sorta the reason WHY we are sexually and passionatly attracted to one another. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 5:14:25 PM |
Could be, but although a woman can get lucky and not screw
things up by performing the relationship sequence out of order,
there is nothing for her to gain, and a lot to lose.
So it's all the woman's fault if she "performs the sequence out of order"?? Geezus... I am so tired of men blaming women for being the ones at fault for first date sex.
Is there not two people involved here? Why is it that women can have sex with a man on the first date and not think any less of him but then that man will often label her a whore?? By all rights, he should also be labelled a whore... oh yeah... I forgot... for a man, that's a good thing.
"...nothing for her to gain, and a lot to lose."
IF we decide to have sex on a first date and he labels me a whore afterward, what I have gained is the fact that I am not going to waste any more time getting involved with a close-minded person and what I have to lose is respect for him for being an a$$hole with double standards. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 5:31:32 PM | If a female had presented her self in the same manner I would have responded in the same manner.
I have been nothing but polite when responding to you..because that is just the way I am. I'm disagreeing, not calling you names....and just explaining it from another point of view...which brings me to:
Do you need me to go back and present you with posts that contradict your opinion before you believe or accept they exist?
This is one of those tone and presentation things I was telling you about.
Of course there are differing opinions, that was my point. Yours is not the only one, nor maybe even the most prevalent...don't have any way to gauge that one..do know more women agree with me than don't...
I used the LOL specifically as a point of irony, maybe that was lost on you? There was no ill intent at all..just pointing out that there are men who don't see it your way...though I think he's wrong ..double standard again...
Do you need me to go back and present you with posts that contradict your opinion before you believe or accept they exist?
This is one of those tone and presentation things I was telling you about.
When someone implements an artificial rule and sees it as test of the other persons worth then they will probably do the same in the relationship later on.
I don't not have sex on a first date because some man might think I'm easy..any man who thought that, I wouldn't get on with anyway..I don't have sex on a first date, because what needs to be in place for me to enjoy it and feel comfortable with it is not in place that early...
It isn't an artificial "rule"...it's what I'm comfortable with...and it has nothing to do with the "worth" of a man, it has to do with whether I'm ready to go there...and the truth is, many women aren't ready to go there that soon...period.
And I can only speak for myself, but, in a relationship I don't use sex as a tool of any kind...
And she will definately loose a potential match if he percieves this preconcieved sequence as controling, manipulative, a sign of low libido or repression.
He can PERCEIVE it however he wants..doesn't make it the truth...and then it is HIS problem, not hers. Sure, such women exist..but, they could just as easily sleep with a man on the first date, and still be doing all that. In fact, being as men are wired differently in that area, and some can be led by sex...it would be to a manipulative woman's advantage to have sex right away..gives him a false sense of security?
It is a double standard... I could say your test is about proving "worth" too..whether she's worthy enough sexually..where, and I don't agree with this premise, but for the sack of argument, that's say it is about proving..it's about proving "emotional" worth...and if he could be so callous about my emotions right off the bat, he could be later in the relationship..thinking my feelings don't count? And be controlling, abusive, or just plain indifferent...
It worked for Kazot..doesn't mean it works for everyone... | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 5:54:40 PM | I'm disagreeing, not calling you names....and just explaining it from another point of view
I haven't called you names, I have questioned your implication that you knew the absolute "truth" and every one else should follow your guidence.
I used the LOL specifically as a point of irony, maybe that was lost on you?
It wasn't lost it was missused. I didn't point out the irony of your statements by quoting other posters that disagreed with you because it was irrelevant.
do know more women agree with me than don't...
You have some statistical evidence of this?
You are probably right but a widely prepetuated myth or missconception is still a myth or missconception. There many examples of this in politics, agendas and everyday life.
Considering the number of miserable people on this site who are using this myth as guide to their romance don't you think it might be a good idea to consider other methods and "sequences"?
It isn't an artificial "rule"...it's what I'm comfortable with
Then it is an artificial rule when it is applied arbitrarily to everyone else who isnt you.
I don't not have sex on a first date because some man might think I'm easy..any man who thought that, I wouldn't get on with anyway..I don't have sex on a first date, because what needs to be in place for me to enjoy it and feel comfortable with it is not in place that early...
So are you not having sex on the first date because of what some guy might think about you or because you are not comfortable with it?
In either case it shows that the problem is an emotional issue in you, not some rule or standard that needs to be followed.
He can PERCEIVE it however he wants..doesn't make it the truth...and then it is HIS problem, not hers.
He is not the one coming here posting a sob story about evil women who wont have sex with him. He moved on looking for a person he percieves as a better match, she on the other hand comes here bitter and cynical about men.
and if he could be so callous about my emotions right off the bat, he could be later in the relationship..thinking my feelings don't count? And be controlling, abusive, or just plain indifferent...
Once again we have a strawman argument.
He isn't the one that came here with the bitterness about women and their demands.
It worked for Kazot..doesn't mean it works for everyone...
True, but I am much more inclined to follow what does work rather than what hasn't.
Don't you think that would be a wiser choice?  | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 6:11:41 PM |
Kazot wrote: I am curious what this mysterious thing is
she stands to lose that her companion and cohort who
was also involved in the act doesn't also stand to lose?
A man has little to lose by engaging in no-strings flings
(i.e. having sex prior to establishing a committed emotional
connection with a loyal, trusted, supportive friend).
Not that there's anything wrong with short term fun per se.
If the lady is certain that's all she's looking for
then she can afford to be less cautious. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 6:18:09 PM |
A man has little to lose by engaging in no-strings flings (i.e. having sex prior to establishing a committed emotional connection with a loyal, trusted, supportive friend).
HUH????
I thought the question was: I am curious what this mysterious thing is she stands to lose that her companion and cohort who was also involved in the act doesn't also stand to lose?
For the third time I am still curious aobut what you are basing your conclusions on? Do you have some statitical data? Studies or are you just pulling stements out of your a$$ and then avoiding it when they are questioned?
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 6:20:17 PM |
He isn't the one that came here with the bitterness about women and their demands.
First of all Kazot: I never said anything was an absolute truth..I said it was true for me, and many other women. You are saying your point of view is an absolute truth.
Second: there is no "emotional" issue..and you misread that sentence..I said the reason for not having sex on a first date has NOTHING to do with a man thinking I'm easy...that's a double standard and I wouldn't get along with such a guy anyway...the only issue is: that I have found that I can't have sex if I am not emotionally involved and still feel good about it. That is a pretty common thing in women, a natural, biological thing. And I learn from my mistakes, and do what works best for me.
And to address the bitterness thing..I, personally, am not bitter at all..and no where in any post of mine on any thread would you find that...I have never once got on here and complained about men being sexually motivated..I acknowledge that men think differently and that is fine, I want them to be different, what I don't want is to be just like them, and think like them..I like that I see it different..compliment each other that way. What I want is respect for the fact that I don't see it that way, and it has nothing to do with dissing them in any way...vive la difference!
What makes you think the way I am doing it hasn't worked? I haven't found the right guy yet... that would have to do with what I'm looking for, not what they are looking for. I'm not unhappy , as I said before, with any of my choices or opportunities...
On a side note: I have noticed that it is most often men in successful relationships that get on the forums and try to persuade women about the sex on a first date thing... I find it interesting why that is.... | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 6:29:51 PM | You are saying your point of view is an absolute truth.
Oh, and where is that?
Some things are inheritantly true by their nature.
My Phylosophy isn't for every one but it has worked and continues to work for many that implement similar methods and concepts.
On a side note: I have noticed that it is most often men in successful relationships that get on the forums and try to persuade women about the sex on a first date thing... I find it interesting why that is....
Maybe because when we find something that works we want to share it so others can find the happiness we have found rather then prepetuating an ideology that has failed for so many.
And to address the bitterness thing..I, personally, am not bitter at all..and no where in any post of mine on any thread would you find that...
Sometimes bitterness and cynical can be mistaken...My bad.
Note:I espoused this belief long before my love found me, I have been comabatting what I see as a self destructive myth from the begining. I got all the same repies plus the "Lets see how well you do at getting women pushing that agenda." on a regular basis. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 7:18:13 PM |
Sometimes bitterness and cynical can be mistaken...My bad.
You say po to toe..I say po tat toe? lol..I don't know that I'm cynical...I am cautious with my heart, and I have learned from experience what works for me and what doesn't...it's only myth to some Kazot, and only from all the men I have known in my life, whether they were romantic interests or not, and ones on here, and on my pay site...I'd have to say you are an exception, not a rule....there are just too many men who take it as an opportunity to just sample..and I happen to be one of the women who can not handle the fall out from that. So, it makes sense to try and filter to avoid that kind of hurt....can't change how I feel about being nothing but a sex object to a man...not like I didn't try...it just doesn't work..and it has far less to do with morals or games, or tests than just being true to who I am..and not setting myself up for the hurt. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 9:08:51 PM | ITS JUST A FIRST DATE or maybe a second, third or fifth...depending on how comfortable the woman feels. Why is that so difficult? Again, it is not a test or some ritual. I don't think you understand women Kazot. Many women do feel like Zangie. I have different reasons...and many women feel like I do. We all have our reasons and that should be understood. There are other women who think it is fine...and good for them, that is the type of woman you perfer to date and good for you.
But, many men would prefer to be in a long term relationship with someone who thinks sex means something. Many women feel the same way about the men they date. We all have our preferences. But, I am saying if you don't know someone, and let your hormones over rule your brain, there is a high likelyhood that things are not going to work out long term. I told you my reasoning for that... What happens is that men are going to do what it takes to have sex with a woman...even if a date is not going well and he sees no long term potential. A lot of women need to see long term potential and need to have deep feelings for a man to have sex..they need to feel that sex has meaning. There is just all sorts of room for misunderstandings if you sleep with someone especially on the first date. Believe me...most of the time people (women in particular) regret it.
Anyways, the reasons vary...all through this thread you can see it....and I believe they are all valid. Women don't necessary like being put in the postion of being the moral gatekeepers. It is not so easy if you make a mistake and someone who you really thought could have potential suddenly feels different about you. ..and just because you (Kazot) don't feel differently, does not mean the rest of men don't... the majority do, but might not admit it. I think you could take a poll (even though I think it is a no brainer) you can even read it in some of the other post, men have said it. But, for women who need to have these deep feelings and misread the whole "date" and think the are in love...they are devistated and feel decieved when suddenly the next day everything has changed. That is what happens most of the time. For all sorts of reasons.
So, again....IT IS JUST THE FIRST DATE. There is no need to have sex. If a man is really interested he would definately understand that and wait until a woman is comfortable. It is just better to wait for everyone involved. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 9:46:38 PM | divineadvisor, Your justification for your sermon has changed....A LOT!
If you want a relationship it is best to show self restraint. I didn't make the rules..
Don't believe the posts above from men who say it does not matter. It does. I know it for a fact. If you sleep with someone immediately do not expect that a long term relationship will develop.
Waiting serves a lot of purposes if you want a relationship.
To say it does not matter ...that is not truth.
Relationships typically do not develop between people who immediately have sex with one another.
There are a lot of men that will look down and think differently about a woman if they immediately sleep with them.
A first date is not the time to sleep with someone if the woman is thinking there could be a relationship.
Kazot: I give up...you just have no clue.
You seem to think it is some kind of ritual or testing...it isn't. It is basic common sense.
I think your points are rediculous and transparent.
When in the end we find out the real answer is you are not comfortable with it.
There is a vast difference between how you feel and deciding that is how everyone else or even most others should feel and claiming it as the "Truth".
I think you could take a poll and even read some of the men have said.
At what point does it sound like a great idea to get guidence from people who have not succeded in getting an LTR for them selves? This is like going to a crack house to get help getting off drugs.
IT IS JUST THE FIRST DATE.
I never said it had to be on the first date.
Original post:
If you sleep with a guy on a first date because everything seems so right.,he never calls . If you don't sleep with him he never calls. The thing I hear from friends is if you sleep with them and they are looking for happily ever after they think you sleep with everyone, so it means nothing to you. If you don't sleep with them after a perfect date they think you are frigid.
I said "IT DOESN"T MATTER." because it doesn't.
Read what she said. IT DOESN'T MATTER which way you go. It will work or it wont work. Whether or not you feel comfortable or that it is the right time for sex for you isn't going to change how he feels.
If it isn't going to work or he is a "player" you will still be hurt and upset the only thing that will change is how much time and effort are invested.
All I have done is point out the fallacy of you trying to apply your needs and opinion to everyone.
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 10:03:21 PM | I honestly don't know how anything has changed. I completely stand by everything I wrote. I see no contradictions.
I will say it again....it just is not smart to have sex with someone on the first date...it is not a test or some sort of ritual...you just don't know that person or their motives... it is for all the reasons above that are mentioned. Your view Kazot is in the minority...that doesn't necessarly mean it is wrong. But, it is a fact it is not wise to have sex immediately and it can be detrimental to a relationship that is just beginning. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/13/2008 11:46:28 PM | First of all; a decent guy wouldn’t EXSPECT a girl to sleep with him on the first date. Especially if he plans on dating for a long term relationship. Why rush enjoy every stage of love making as long as it peaks your interest. Talking, flirting , looking at each other, smell, touching, taste, ect... enjoy it all to the fullest because you will never go back there and feel the rush of first time love... it may happen all in one night, but so what if it doesn't? If he doesn’t come back u win!!!! He was a jerk!! If he comes back at least u know that he is not just playing short games... | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/14/2008 5:02:09 AM |
I will say it again....it just is not smart to have sex with someone on the first date...
you just don't know that person or their motives...
Several posters have established that you don't know there motives after several dates.
Once again it isn't what date you have sex on IT DOESN"T MATTER.
But, it is a fact it is not wise to have sex immediately and it can be detrimental to a relationship that is just beginning.
How is this a fact?
Many posters have stated otherwise.
Most potential romances do not work out so by your logic no one should ever go on a date. Does that make sense to you?
I will repeat again because you don't seem to comprehend what I am saying:
It isn't about what number of the date it is, IT DOESN'T MATTER. If it is going to work it will work if you held off till the 20th date or if you fvcked like demted monkeys 30 seconds after meeting each other.
The only thing that changes is how much time, effort and emotional investment you want to waste on a relationship that isn't going to work. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/14/2008 7:27:51 AM | You know I've gotten away from worrying about sex and a first date. I think its something I've come to deal with if I want sex then I'll have it; if I don't then I won't, but I don't think its either wrong or right. Its all in what you might expect afterwards. I just tend to take things for what they are if they present themselves something more then great.
It all depends. I don't think any less of people either way. If you feel like a sexual deviant that night and you say no matter how this goes I wanna f*ck then do it! | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/14/2008 8:52:09 AM | Wow. Leave for a weekend to have a string of first date sexual encounters and return to this circus!
By the way I'm only kidding. The sex was ALL with a special lady who I had sex with on the first date 7 months ago and we are crazy in love now. I must be an anomaly.
Chuckyb51,
Again, reiterating my last couple posts in here and I feel like a broken record already but what does it say about YOUR self-respect if you sleep with a woman on a first date and will not say no, but will not call her back because you think she's too easy and you can't respect her. Maybe you should work on learning to love and respect yourself before you go off into this world blindly fornicating with easy women. ;-)
All the argument in here cracks me up. There was a movie about 15 or more years ago called The Tall Guy, starring Emma Thompson and Jeff Goldblum. Anyone seen it? There's a scene where the two hook up and he's concerned about losing her respect because they are getting intimate before even going on a date, and she says she's rather have sex BEFORE the first date dinner because if the sex is really bad what is the point of going for dinner? There's no point in wasting a pile of dates and a load of loot only to find out you aren't attracted to the person sexually or you aren't sexually compatible, or they are just plain terrible or strange in bed. Now I don't subscribe to this line of thinking directly but it has a good point. And Kazot is absolutely correct. There's nothing in the moral dictionary that says having sex after 20 dates is better than having sex after 1. Sex is sex. What you choose to delude yourself with is your choice, but to say the rest of us should adhere to your beliefs is ludicrous. Sex will solidify a relationship if there is a chance of one to begin with, and it'll burn the opportunity if it wasn't in the cards. Wouldn't you rather NOT waste your time if it wasn't meant to be?! If you are that concerned with it then perhaps you should be looking at those you go on dates with. It's nice that a person would want to give everyone a shot, but honestly that is what a coffee or drink meet and greet is for. We're talking first dates here people. Not the 20 minute latte in the mall. If you've agreed to a first date you've obviously decided that you like this person and you should only be considering the date if you consider the possibility that this person could be what you are looking for. That's the purpose of the first meet! I don't go out on a "date" date with anyone that I couldn't see myself ending up with. I've said no to a first date with some pretty sexy women because on paper all they were WAS a beautiful body and face. I need substance. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/14/2008 6:58:45 PM | | Kazot: I don't know what you are talking about saying that several posters have stated I don't know THEIR motives. Who's motives...the males or the females? Don't you get what I am trying to say. I have been saying that all along...you don't know what someone's motives are and that is why you should not have sex with them when you first meet. Many women need to feel sex is more than something physical...men have no problem with sex just being physical...that is where a lot of these problems begin. Now I understand that is not the only motive and I have addressed that also...do you need me to cut and past it for you...I have said all the reasons stated above for women not sleeping with men on a first date are valid. If that is the way she feels how can it be anything else. There are just SOOOOO many reasons why it is not a good idea that I don't think I could name them all. I have also acknowledged if it works for you that is fine. And it is... But, what I have stated is that you are in the minority of men that feel that way. And agian, that does not make it wrong the only reason I bring it up that you are in the minority is that most men will not date women they have sex with on the first date....there are just too many reasons why they wouldn't and in particular there is a double standard. Do you think I want to say this is right...NO! So, I am just trying to say to people it does matter, and I say this to women who don't have a lot of experience dating, because they will be under the impression that sex meant something else. They can be easily swayed by men saying it doesn't matter... when more often than not, it does. It can not be denied...it just is not a good idea to have sex with people you just meet for many many many reasons. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/14/2008 7:56:58 PM | divineadvisor what we have come to see is this is about you not other women.
You keep coming to the same point which has only been your point that it is about the first date.
It isn't, that is your issue not the point of discussion.
I understand and sympathise that you are not and can not be comfortable having sex before what ever date it is that you need for your insecurities.
But to keep claiming that your needs and fears apply to every one else is wrong and a disservice to others. Accept that you have issues and we will accept it. Try to convince others they need to have the same problems as you and we will disagree.
You have said several times things like:
I have said all the reasons stated above for women not sleeping with men on a first date are valid.
when more often than not, it does. It can not be denied...it just is not a good idea to have sex with people you just meet for many many many reasons.
But the only reasons you have ever presented was your own inability to be comfortable and by proxy you have determined that it is the same for all women.
There are women who are uncomfortable with their sexuality and self image or they have made poor choices and been hurt emotionaly but there are also a lot of women who are secure in them selves and competent to decide when and where they want sex.
It has nothing to do with the first date or what ever number you choose, if it is going to work it will if it isn't it wont.
the only reason I bring it up that you are in the minority is that most men will not date women they have sex with on the first date....
LOL that is hilarious, I am sorry but there are women men would kill for not just because they had sex on the first date but because they were so incredably good at it.
Try to use some common sense. If the guy likes the woman and the sex is great he will be back. Most of the time the sex isn't what he wanted so he moves on, that will not change no matter what number the date is.
You are under the impression that if the guy knows you long enough he will over look mediocre sex, the heart break forum is full of women who think that way.
Tae some time look at the number of posts that talk about the LTRs that developed from sex on the first date, they are just as common as the ones that don't. There is a reason for that. IT DOESN'T MATTER.
We understand your insecurities and we sympathise but please stop trying to get everyone else to be just as insecure, pent up and repressed as you are. Let them live, love and experience life. I understand that your knowledge and experience has lead you to a perfect LTR but I am sure they will do just fine without your divine advise. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/14/2008 8:17:33 PM | Good grief Kazot and Divineadivsor, get your own room!!!!!!
Yes, this is all about sharing your own feelings/emotions/opinons but you guys are taking it to extreme!
I agree w/another above post, plain and simple: (we're all adults here) If a woman sleeps w/a man on the first date, she's a slut and a whore. If a man has slept w/a woman on the first date, he's just become another legend in his (and friends) own mind. Why?????????
Enough already. It is what it is. We're all adults and we all make choices. Some others may not agree with and some WE may not even feel comfortable dealing with if we do that 'deed' on the first night.
We're human beings. Sexual, emotional, regretful...............but don't cast stones. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/14/2008 8:44:25 PM | | Again, Kazot...you know nothing about me. You just know I don't agree with you so you take personal shots at me...things that you completely make up in your own mind. You also take bits and pieces out of posts and make comments on them out of context. The minute you feel maybe someone might have a point ... you change your stance by saying ... you already know someone very well before you go on a first date. Well then ... you have no point. That is the problem..you are just illogical. There is no point in this...it is just a big waste of time. | |
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| Sleeping with some one on a first date
Posted: 4/14/2008 8:49:33 PM | Kazot wrote: I doubt that the multitude of people
who have not followed this so called (seduction)
sequence are not going to break off their successful
relationships over it.
Correct. Doing the steps out of order stacks the odds
against her, it doesn't guarantee failure. If the relationship
succeeds, she got lucky. There's no reason to break it off.
litefoot77 wrote: First of all; a decent guy wouldn’t EXPECT
a girl to sleep with him on the first date. Especially if he plans
on dating for a long term relationship.
That's not consistent with my experience. Some decent men
are accustomed to ladies wanting sex on (or before) the first date
regardless of whether his intended outcome is a ONS, FWB or LTR.
namrael wrote: How must someone possibly think of themselves
if they would use "was willing to have sex with me on our first date"
as a criterion for NOT dating someone?
Excellent point. By that criterion, some would have no one to date. | |
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