| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 5:25:09 AM | 'Cheating *OR* Fun'?
why does it have to be 'Either/Or'? 
(noBody get all *riled* up , J O K E)
He AlReady IS 'leaving OP' , In his ~Heart~
sad 
Sad ER ? when one is so ~sensitive~ , that they ~FEEL~ 'it' , the Second one IS 'gone' | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 9:45:04 AM | | I know of someone on this particular website who IS dating someone currently, yet frequents this website and a few other singles websites often. I think if I were his girlfriend, I'd like to know about it. Ladies...beware! | |
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naeco
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Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 28 | |
| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 9:48:04 AM |
he told me he loved me, would never cheat, and would of never met her even on the day.
Of course he said that. Do you think he would have told you if he was cheating? He lied, and you were gullible enough that he got away with it.
I'd imagine he still ended up with her - just using a different e-mail account, and a different time and place. | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 10:03:28 AM | | I don't think it's betrayal. I think it was a symptom of something wrong in your relationship. I think there are people who get bored with their relationship and look for a little excitement on line. I also believe these people would never cheat on the person they are with. Should you have left him, not before talking to him about it and digging deep to findout the reason. I think the reason he gave you was an indication he had too much time on his hands and was bored. How many of us are on here listed as friends, not single, but if we post a pic, we know we are gonna get some excitment happening. How many of us will actually act on it though????? How many of us are on here for the forums, just to add a little excitement to our many hours we are left alone by our partners???? | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 10:08:25 AM | when you are in a relationship, flirting (online or not) is cheating; point and simple!
If you need to have your ego boosted, then go to gym, do a diet, buy new cloths for god sake! | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 10:32:34 AM |
How many of us will actually act on it though????? But why create temptation?
How many of us are on here for the forums, just to add a little excitement to our many hours we are left alone by our partners???? Why not get rid of your boredom by doing something with your life other than looking for excitement online?Why not work on making things right if you feel something is missing in your relationship? Unless you are unable to leave the house because of a physical disability/lack of mobility there are a million and a half other things you could be doing to remedy feeling left alone by your partner. The laziest choice and the one most likely to cause more problems in your relationship is to chat with people of the opposite sex on a dating site.
To the OP... gut instincts are often right. Sometimes it's not anything in the relationship that you can address. There are some people who have deep-rooted self-esteem issues that makes them seek out attention from multiple sources. They will also cheat if given a chance. Having a profile on a dating site and communicating with the opposite sex gives them opportunity. | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 12:02:03 PM | | girl i no how it was i have been through that but what u should of done was got on a diffrent name with a diffrent pic and did the same thing talk to him sweet and say your single and ask to meet and just see if he would of met u there | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 12:56:34 PM | java: betrayal is betraying to be something you are not as in "single"....talking badly about your mate or enticingly to someone behind the back of the person who is ALLOWED to believe you are a COUPLE is betrayal....I think this was "shopping"...and then "dropping"....like a rock, if it had worked out his way.....it's a cowards way out....and they do it for many reasons....it is still betrayl and cheating....
some men and women don't know how to keep the "human" in their actions and reactions...it is all about immediate gratification...and all about them...no one's happy unless they are happy....they've no honor and allow no dignity to others....and someone else's heart is always on the line to keep them that way..... happy...they'll settle for nothing less. It is ALL ABOUT THEM. Push you right off an emotional cliff not even look back, if someone else happens by at the right time offering something they merely think might be better!
OP:You've been given a sign! Take advantage of it! | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 2:16:10 PM |
when you are in a relationship, flirting (online or not) is cheating; point and simple!
If you need to have your ego boosted, then go to gym, do a diet, buy new cloths for god sake!
Nice to hear this POV from a man. I was beginning to think only women felt this was inappropriate. | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 6:20:04 PM | 100% Right on for dumping him. That's cheating. Arranging to meet someone? That's cheating.
I think as to the other stuff, cyber sex and online friends and whatnot, you have to ask 'Is this the sort of behaviour I don't want my spouse/partner to find out about?' If the answer is yes, then it's probably cheating.
Unless it's Halo 3. That's different. Some ladies just don't get video games, you know?
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 8:06:24 PM | Irishblueeyes, are you really get to the issue. to the root of the problem...to the reason he feels a need to be on line.... obviously something wrong in the relationship....do you just bail or do you try to find out the reason for it and try to make the relationship work...I've always believed that any relationship needs work, it doesn't just happen....he is on line for a reason...maybe not to actually meet someone but maybe to fill some time... maybe she needs to find out what need of his is not being met.....
If he was on line to cheat, he would cheat and there wouldn't be a question about it. I think there is room for discussion on this one instead of just jumping to a conclusion. | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/6/2008 8:23:26 PM | | The same thing recently happened to me...again...on this site. This time, the guy was always on line and when I tried to im him, he never responded. At first he wrote me wonderful e-mails everyday...several...including love poems. Then, all of a sudden, he wouldn't write...only call...several times a day. Kept telling me I'd make a perfect wife... I began to suspect something was up, so I put a testimonial on his profile -- telling everyone about "us" and the wonderful love poems. He was very upset and wanted me to remove it...silly me, the other women he was leading on at the same time knew they weren't the only one! It's a really simple, quick way to determine if the guy you're involved with is really only involved with you...and if he's playing you, it lets the other women involved know he's a player. | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/9/2008 8:53:06 PM | | whose to say or know??? Hmmm perhaps he already has physically 'cheated'....a lie is a lie, a cheat is a cheat.........betrayal...is what it is. | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/9/2008 9:33:57 PM | It's deffinitely cheating! Just this week alone met a guy from DeSoto, Mo. Nice guy gives me his home & cell number, tells me he's afriad to be hurt..called his house & heard his girlfriend screaming & cussing in the background. Guess what..he's still online...just to cheat again with someone else. Then today had someone from NC wants to love me & meet me...did a background check...I'll call his wife tomorrow.
You have to do your homework honey! If they continue online...they're just going to go after the next person! Good luck...do your research on these people! Ali | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/9/2008 10:24:38 PM | You had every right to dump him.
With this technology before us, every person involved in a relationship must decide to be as faithful while surfing as they would be in any other setting. Any time we communicate with a person of the opposite sex, it should be done in an accountable and appropriate manner.
What most people do with each other online was what they did when they first fell in love with their partner; they are putting their best foot forward, working to communicate and being sensitive to the other. Even though they had gotten lazy in their real life relationship they found great solace in illicitly swooning each other electronically.
It is so easy online, for people to invent any persona they desire. It is fantasy and anyone who falls for it deserves what they get.
You did the correct thing. | |
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kid4
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Joined: 1/3/2008
Msg: 43 | |
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kid4
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Joined: 1/3/2008
Msg: 44 | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/9/2008 10:42:46 PM | | From what I'm reading from you, he is thinking in between his legs again and He's playing you for a fool and will keep playing you like a cheap violin for as long as you let him. | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/9/2008 11:18:56 PM | Well, You dont know if he had already met some woman, and you just caught him in between his next game.
I think if someone is tellling you they love you and are living in committed relationship, leaving you under the impression everythings ok....
then its cheating not to be honest and be leading other woman on as well. just differ levels of his game.
reflects his character and your better off without him.
smiles/peace | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/9/2008 11:34:34 PM | | Absolutely it was cheating!! And the above post says it all. NOOOO grey areas, any kind of interaction that is more involved than a regular conversation, is cheating. When you are in a committed relationship and you are chatting with people of the opposite sex in an inappropriate manner, like flirting or pet names or what have you, then you have crossed the line from chatting with a friend...to cheating!!!! | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/10/2008 7:28:42 AM | | yes, You were right to dump him. If I was dating a man seriously I would pull my account and expect him to too. I knew I guy once that was on line all the time at these sites but was also living with me. He was trying to find someone better and with more money. I finally got rid of him and his computer. Unless a man uses a computer in his work. He has no business being on line looking for a hookup if he is with you. | |
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| betrayal online: is this cheating or fun?
Posted: 1/10/2008 10:21:26 AM | | hmmm i d sure like to know why he would do it maybe you jumped into this relationship the wrong way or to soon or not know his deepest desires or really know this guy i think it z also your fault and yes you should separate fro a while then find out why and correct iot for the next time cause it ll be hard to break a habit i know any thing i do wrong with my relationships i look a t my self and i know that there z somnething i didn t do right i learn and apply | |
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