| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 12/30/2007 10:15:30 PM | It's definitely a peeve of mine, too. With the advent of the cell phone, there is no good reason not to call if you are going to be more than 10 minutes late, so that's about all I would give someone. My intolerance for lateness also stemmed from my childhood and getting picked up last from school and the church's Sunday school. Sometimes the teacher would have to drive me home because she was sick of waiting with me  | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 12/30/2007 10:20:31 PM | My response to this would be to not make arrangements which involved me expecting them to be there at the agreed hour. As a child, this is kind of out of your hands, but you could have taken a book with you to read or a game to play with, expecting a wait.
As an adult the kind of thing you can use a combination of the following:
1) pick them up so that you get there on time
2) don't agree to do anything with them that requires you both to be there at a particular time
3) always have a plan B and communicate it to them e.g. I will be here to meet you at 2pm, but if you get here after 2 then I'll have gone to XYZ and you'll have to find me there.
4) Don't start cooking until they are already through the door
It's simply about factoring in their lateness and expecting it and allowing them to be late and not choosing to do stuff here that is going to be a problem. If this means that you miss out on doing certain things with them, then that's just the way it is. | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 12/30/2007 10:28:23 PM | | I let the person I'm seeing know I'm going to be late if things happen out of my control. It is rude to make someone sit and wait for 10 minutes without letting them know | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 12/30/2007 10:33:57 PM | | Dude you have no idea the last woman I was seeing up till christmas was always at least 4 hours late for everything. can you imagine that ? I would lay there watching her for at least three hours just waiting for her to get dressed and put on her makeup, lotion, you friggen name it. this is no word of a lie. supposed to have dinner for my birthday at around 8 she shows up at 11 ? It was sick ! | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 12/30/2007 10:36:31 PM | | i think we are all in agreance here.it is situational.if someone was late perpetualy because of self satisfying nonesense i would be pissed.and i will admit that i tend to take life as it comes and am not much for orginizing my time.i tend to shy away from deadlines,but if there is one of necessity,i stick to what time i need to be there.i never set a specific time if i can help it.6 ish is fine.dont be affraid to call and say 7 ish.i guess my personality can be frustrating for people.deadlines and time restraints drive are annoying to me,probably as annoying as the lack of them are to others.a lack of trying to be respectfull in either case is annoying to everyone. | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 12/30/2007 11:05:20 PM |
A thread about people who get stood up got me thinking about another related issue. I did a search and didn't see anything obvious that covers this discussion.
I think rational people understand that when folks get together in a metro area or are driving 20 plus miles to meet someone they may not be at the location at exactly the agreed upon time. It has been my experience that 10 to 15 minutes is a good window when meeting someone and about 30 minutes is the most that you should ever wait for someone.
I'm wondering how others feel about people who are perpetually late, and I don't mean the 10 to 15 minute variety who are late once in a while but those who have no ability to prioritize and don't seem to comprehend that 2:00PM does not mean 2:30 or 2:45. I guess this is a pet peave of mine because I grew up with a parent who fit into this category. Growing up I got really frustrated waiting to be picked up from school for 45 minutes or an hour when our house was only four miles from the school. So, reasonably this has developed into a pet peave with me as an adult.
How seriously do you all take ones ability to schedule and arrive on-time when you are forming a relationship with someone. Would the "this person is always late" figure into your reasons for not being with someone?
Yawn....
Tell the person that's always late how important punctuality is to you,w/o preaching or nagging about it.
Once.
If their behavior changes...cool.
If not..then that's the way your relationship is going to go.
You have to make up your mind from that point if that's way you need things to happen.
Sometimes simple problem DO have simple solutions. | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 1/10/2008 9:07:06 PM | | My friends always joke that I have my own standard time - I'm always running late! (Usually it's no more than 10-15 minutes and I generally call to let people know.) | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 2/15/2008 2:19:37 PM | It seriously drives me up the wall when someone is carelessly late, especially if I depend on that person for a ride somewhere and I have to be at an appointment by a specific time. Add to that the fact that said appointment was hard to obtain, and took a while to schedule.
I hate needing to be driven anywhere, but buses don't always connect right, and sometimes my destination is way off the route. Taxis are out of the question too. I can't afford to acquire my own vehicle ~ not to mention driving instruction, permission levels and licenses ~ so I need the wheels of another who is headed the same direction.
If it's just that so-and-so said we're doing something unstructured, and they'll be there around 2 pm or so, that's different; I'm not 'needed' elsewhere so I won't be complicating someone else's plans. It's when my presence is required by an event or job, etc .. that tardiness resulting from poor time-management is extremely exasperating. That, and the ensuing excuses.
If that person DOES show up before I throw my arms up in despair, I ask what happened, and the answer tends to be "sorry, I got busy with stuff." .. they knew they had to come and pick me up at, say, 10 am, but as they live about a 20-min drive away from me (not including traffic stalls of whatever kind), leaving their home at 10 am is not effective ...
**** I would not want to date a chronically late man. *****
The only possible benefit that could exist is that I might relax and learn the sky won't fall if I'm not somewhere EXACTLY on time.
On the other hand, if I know I have to keep an eye on a clock or watch, I can't understand why the heck others don't. | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 2/15/2008 2:48:36 PM | | I find punctuality to be very important, primordial even, as it is a sign of respect. Mind you, I'll understand if someone left in time and got stuck in a traffic jam or the metro was shut down. However, I’d definitely expect a phone call. The metro has phones and even provide cel lines in Montreal. I'll never ever again have a long-term relationship with someone who is almost always late and does not even call to say that he'll not be on-time. A perpetual unpunctual is definitely black-listed in my book. Having lived it, I shall not accept this type of lack of respect in my life ever again. It’s most assuredly a pet-peeve for me now. | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 2/15/2008 3:56:18 PM | I used to have a friend who was always late. One time I had tickets to a football game. I said we are leaving my house at such-and-such-time, if you are not there by the time we leave, your ticket will be in my mailbox and you can drive yourself and pay your own $20 parking. Guess who was on time (5 minutes late)????
I used to have another friend who was always late. One time I made plans with her for dinner and a musical. I suggested we meet at the restaurant at 5:30; she said 5:00 would be better. So I arrived 5:00ish, and she arrived after 5:30. She decided (without telling me) that my time was actually a better choice. I was so angry I didn't enjoy dinner or the show.
Note: both are former friends. If they are selfish with time, they are selfish in many other ways too. | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 2/15/2008 4:11:33 PM | I used to have a friend who was always late. One time I had tickets to a football game. I said we are leaving my house at such-and-such-time, if you are not there by the time we leave, your ticket will be in my mailbox and you can drive yourself and pay your own $20 parking. Guess who was on time (5 minutes late)????
if this was me,i would say that buying the ticket and paying for parking will be fine thanks.ill get there when i can.i try as much as possible to not set a time for anything.lol. | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 2/15/2008 5:08:08 PM | | I used to always be on time for everything. Then I got a job making deliveries and spent five years rushing around all day long to pick up or deliver things on time. I think my "inner clock" must have rebelled and turned itself off the day I left that job, because for the longest time after that I was always 10 or 15 minutes late to everything. It's been about 3 1/2 years, and I'm just now getting to the point where I'm at least on time to the important stuff, and that 10 or 15 minutes I used to always be late has become more like 5 now for the not-so-important stuff. I'm trying, really I am! | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 2/16/2008 7:41:09 AM | I'm usually a punctual person who arrives 5-10 minutes early to work. If my job starts at 8AM and I arrive at 8AM, I'm late!  But when I have to meet someone and I'm arriving late, I always call and tell them that I'll be coming in late. It's only polite to let people know that you're still coming so they don't despair. | |
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| People who are perpetually late
Posted: 2/16/2008 9:17:48 AM | | it be really annoying for anyone who liked being on time....i can be bad for this sometimes but i try my best to be on time and if i'm going to be late i always call to let them know so they know to kill a little bit of time while i'm heading over.. | |
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