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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 6:39:27 AM |
When did this all start? Do they really do this? If they do where are they because I have not found any.
I'm sure the men asking this are joking, but lots of women do this - probably more than you think nowadays, the question might not be "do women approach?" but more accurately "are they approaching you?"
Just sayin'. | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 8:16:15 AM |
It was not humor, he stated I contacted him first, he was dead serious, that when we met, i was to buy dinner, drinks etc, since I was the one that contacted him.
I went on saying, are you kidding me, he said no, i usually contact the women, and you contacted me, so therefore my rules, you play by them, hahahha like I am going to play by any man's rules!
I'm like c ya
And...
After that experience, i know now never to e-mail a man again first!!!!!!!!!!!!
One bad apple yes, does sour the whole bunch.
I will reiterate, i always go dutch anyway, but don't ASSUME that i will pay for you, beacuse I found your profile interesting and contacted you first!
A sense of humour is an essential component of online dating, ya know...
Arlo | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 8:19:47 AM |
It was not humor ... he was dead serious...
When you're SUCCESSFULLY teasing someone, you don't TELL them that you're teasing them. Geezus...
Arlo, heart bleeding for the humour-impaired...  | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 8:30:31 AM | but lots of women do this - probably more than you think nowadays, the question might not be "do women approach?" but more accurately "are they approaching you?"
Maybe some women do approach men, but almost anytime I have gone out someplace. I see a lot more men approaching women than the reverse. BTW I'm talking about women approaching men in general. Not just me in particular. | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 8:32:54 AM | Excuse me arlo, sorry you can't comprehend but i stated what he said and I do have a great sense of humor, and asked him more than once are you serious. And yes he was. Sorry you can not believe such a man would be so serious about something, but he was.
Enough said on that, typical ***hole. It would have bene differnet oh yeah I am teasing you come on. he was not, he said HIS RULE!!!!!!!!!
You know there are ***holes out there!!
He actualy sent me an e-mail this morning stated, be careful of how many men i contact FIRST, it's the tule on POF, you contact you buy!!!!!!!!!!!!! he's blocked | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 8:41:24 AM | (tiny dancer) He actualy sent me an e-mail this morning stated, be careful of how many men i contact FIRST, it's the tule on POF, you contact you buy!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The admins are getting slack, then, 'cause I never got that memo.
I can comprehend just fine, thanks.
... and asked him more than once are you serious. And yes he was.
Ah. Gotcha. So, he was an "azzhole", but he was absolutely telling the gawd's honest truth to you when he was "explaining" about who pays for what, and that it's the new "rule" on PoF.
Geezus. And these people can VOTE?
I actually sense a potential killing to be made : if I tell her that I really, REALLY own that bridge, and I'll sell it to her for an INCREDIBLE bargain, wanna bet she'd go for it?
Arlo | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 9:42:42 AM | | well arlo, as i said I have a great sense of humor, he doesn't he was adamont of the fact, i contact I buy, it was not a joke by no means, i can tell a joke a mile away. When I proceeded to tell him forget it goodbye. if in fact it was a joke as you said? Don't you think he would have said hey hun, i was just kidding, no he did not,, And proceeeded to harp about it in an e-mail to me!! | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 12:38:30 PM |
I actually sense a potential killing to be made : if I tell her that I really, REALLY own that bridge, and I'll sell it to her for an INCREDIBLE bargain, wanna bet she'd go for it?
Not hardly there arlo, I guess you can't believe that a member of your species on POF can actually be an ***hole and you truely want him to be the "Good Guy" and be the "Jokester". Which in fact it never was a joke. This was a telephone conversation we had, not typed words, and you can sense by someone's tone, when in fact they are joking and or serious. better yet, you tell them nevermeind forget it, I'm not paying for you, and they do not say, hey babe it was a joke". All he said was FINE!!
Sorry, ***holes do exist out there, and he is one of them, perhaps looking for a meal ticket?? You know there are men out there looking for a meal ticket as well as women? Oh my, can you believe such a thing?? Oh , no, you must think he was just joking. I will be more than happy to give you his screen name in order for you to ask him, yourself if in fact he was joking, he will say NO.
I am highly educated, so your comment I would go for it, hahaha makes no sense, I fall for nothing, but I will also not ever pay for a man that tells me I have to do so. I pay if I feel like I want to, BIG DIFFERENCE.
Did you ever think, perhaps I make a great deal of money and he wanted a free meal? Yes, I indeed think that's the case. As I stated, no man that I have ever contacted has said such a rude comment, and indeed it was not joking.
But, I wil reiterate, there are MALE moochers out there as well as female moochers.
As I think back on the telephone conversation, what is funny before he even said that, DING DING. I asked if he has been dating alot?? He said NO, he doesn't have a lot of money and just started a new job !! There you go in a nutshell ARLO, a male moocher wanting a free ride, and I didn't fall for it. Hope someone else does'nt either.
And sorry, not interested in buying a bridge, I did not get to the position I am in, in my career, for falling for such nonsesnse. so believe your little jokester, as you continue to argue with me, case in point, he;s a MOOCHER!!!!!!! | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/19/2008 12:45:20 PM |
Not hardly there arlo, I guess you can't believe that a member of your species on POF can actually be an ***hole and you truely want him to be the "Good Guy" and be the "Jokester".
*sigh* Okay, last time, with feeling (WTH, it's a long weekend, I'm bored...)
No, I'm perfectly well aware that people can be (*gasp*) azzholes. Thing is, though, that that is never my FIRST guess when someone does something I don't like/approve of, but the LAST.
I will be more than happy to give you his screen name in order for you to ask him, yourself if in fact he was joking, he will say NO.
No, the more likely outcome is, we'll both have a laugh when he tells me how he strung along this dingy broad about the new "rules" on PoF, and how she bought it.
And sorry, not interested in buying a bridge ...
But... but, it's a REALLY NICE bridge!
Arlo | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/20/2008 8:08:13 AM | Maybe some women do approach men, but almost anytime I have gone out someplace, I see a lot more men approaching women than the reverse.
I agree that the norm is still that men do this more, and in a crowded place, it's pretty true but women:
1. Don't always hit on men the same way men hit on women, and
2. Don't make a spectacle when they do it...mostly because it's uncharted territory.
It might just not be as obvious in reverse...as a man you can clearly see another man going in for the kill, but may mistake the women who do approach in some other way. So there are probably more women than you'd think approaching (or giving green lights), despite the fact that more men in that place are very obviously working the room. Just a thought.
BTW I'm talking about women approaching men in general. Not just me in particular.
Fair enough. That's a good thing - there are a lot of men who assume if they're not getting hit on, then no one else is either...it's nice to know some also try to use an objective vantage point. | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/20/2008 8:44:42 AM | As a guy it is very flattering for a girl to make first contact. If I have viewed your profile several times without contacting y0u in means one of two things... this woman is way out of my league and I cannot, for the life of me, figure out what to say to her.. or the guy has not really been truthful in his profile and is scared to contact you because you have enough brains to see through all the crap that guys post just for women..
Hope this helped.. I am going to view your profile now but it does not count because I contacted you BEFORE I viewed you..hehe
Pedro Omally | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 5/20/2008 9:53:23 AM |
No, the more likely outcome is, we'll both have a laugh when he tells me how he strung along this dingy broad about the new "rules" on PoF, and how she bought it.
Oh I bought it now????? I got strung along, by what????? LMMFAo
So, since when did I meet this man and buy him the drinks and dinner he so much wanted because I contacted him?
I want to hear this?? Did my twin show up and actually pay for this man??
Many reasons, I did not want to meet him, clingy, wanted to meet the first day we talked, etc, but yes that was the deciding factor, and his money problems he was so inclined to tell me, ding ding!
BTW, I asked other men's view on thsi particular matter and they don't agree with you, they think he was rude and ignorant .
Sorry, I don't play by any so called rules, let alone your make believe POF rules.
A ditz would have bought it, and paid for the mooches meal, this chick did not, wouldn't you say,, that would be someone who bought it??
By the way arlo, he did it to somone else, joke's on you isn't it? Word gets around on POF when you are local, his profiel pretty much reads he's a broke loser. I don't care hw much someone makes, just don't care about mine!!
Guy is trying to mooch off of successful woman, well most successful woman, won't buy it.
I didn't become the Vice President of a Corporation because I was a "ditz" and bought things and stupid rules. I can spot a mooch a mile away.
Have great day keep Fishing!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 6/7/2008 12:25:45 AM | | Normally, I don't ever make the first contact. But having been on this *popular* website for a while and *STILL* be single made me think maybe I should change my passive approach. So I will start to initiate more from now on. I mean, I'd rather go after guys I would actually be interested in than getting lots of emails from guys that I am unlikely to be interested in. Don't get discouraged in the process..all you need is just ONE person :) | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 6/7/2008 10:19:03 AM | Personally I think it's great and I wish more women took the chance. The whole "waiting for the guy to initiate" thing seems so 1950's. I mean, really, how can you complain that you get messages from all the "wrong guys" if you're not even willing to take a chance on what might be the "right guys".
Then again, it might just be a North American thing too. I know from travelling through Europe, Australia and Africa that women CAN (and should be willing to) make the first move... | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 6/7/2008 11:58:57 AM | OOOOPs Iam not a guy
Sorry.. to tell this to you guys. Since i have no bad feelings about men. Here comes the "but" . every man i have emailed frist . like just a friend hi . Or Shown any interest
toward. Has yet to answer back. Just to say thanks. So women are also confused by this. And men do freak easy....really ! even when I have anwsered a Email asking to get to know me better. And replied "It would be great to get to know you better"....Poof.. I never hear back. Think some people mind you . just hide behide the computer.Or they don't want what they ask for. I don't understand, But i find nothing wrong with Emailing a man frist> Don't you want to have a chance to choose who your attracted too as well.
You go girl !  | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 6/8/2008 10:58:23 AM | I have no problem with a woman making first contact as long as once we begin talking she does not all of a sudden go belly up cold fish with no explanation then I begin to wonder about her sincerity.  | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 6/8/2008 1:26:28 PM | | I'd say brownie points for girls that contact them first! I like girls who are a little aggressive, I think guys like to feel special and wanted just as much as girls do. Just like in a relationship, I think that most guys, although will not admit it, do like getting called and been shown their wanted and desired. ... I know I do | |
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| What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 6/8/2008 1:48:13 PM | | I think it's great. I mean we are in 2008 not 1950... You can't complain about getting the 'wrong' messages if you're not sending them to the 'right' (or at least what you think is right) people... | |
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