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 Author Thread: What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
 Mrwrong37

Joined: 2/12/2008
Msg: 176
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/19/2008 12:24:20 PM
So has any guy on here, gotten more messages from women, now that they KNOW we like to be messaged? it seems to me, they really dont care about what we are saying in here
 luv_tigger

Joined: 11/23/2007
Msg: 177
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/20/2008 2:58:31 PM
If I read something in a profile that's caught my eye and made me think "hey, this guy would probably be cool to talk to" I deffinately initiate a conversation.
 suffolkcountybarhoppers

Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 178
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/20/2008 4:49:54 PM
Personally, I almost never contact a woman online first, I wait for them to come to me. Very different from my actions in real life, where I talk to everyone.

If you are interested in someone, you should definitely contact them.
 KiwiJoygirl

Joined: 3/22/2007
Msg: 179
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/20/2008 5:57:51 PM
So, what I'm getting from this, is that men like us to make the first contact. Then WHY am I getting absolutely NO response from any of them? I usually say something about how I like their profile etc. Help me. waaaaaa
 strangerstill

Joined: 12/20/2004
Msg: 180
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/20/2008 6:31:31 PM
I'm a coward so I prefer it.
 Mi_amore

Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 181
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/20/2008 6:39:13 PM
I think we as a gender would welcome that because it takes some pressure off of us.
It's nerve racking always making the first move. So go ahead & bite the bullet, what have you got to lose.
 Jemue

Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 182
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/20/2008 7:34:10 PM

This is the reason why i wont contact anybody lol, im afraid of having this type of reply [ "thanks for the interest but you're not my type" ]reply


Though you expect others to do what you aren't
 Mrwrong37

Joined: 2/12/2008
Msg: 183
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/20/2008 8:57:46 PM
kiwijoy..maybe the guys who WIll anaswer you, arent within 75 miles?
 jurupa

Joined: 2/12/2008
Msg: 184
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/20/2008 10:22:04 PM

So has any guy on here, gotten more messages from women, now that they KNOW we like to be messaged?
Nope.


it seems to me, they really dont care about what we are saying in here
Since when did women listen to us men? lol

But seriously I don't think its not them not caring what we say, but more the mind set that all they "rule" online dating. One would think with women generally out numbering guys on online dating sites, that they would be contacting the guys, but nope. Instead they out number us and expect us to contact them with a high rate of being "rejected" by them.
 thefrener

Joined: 5/5/2007
Msg: 185
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/21/2008 6:12:57 AM
I really do not have a problem with it why would I .
 thefrener

Joined: 5/5/2007
Msg: 186
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/21/2008 6:18:45 AM
Oh and the rejection thing I used to have a problem with it My ego I guess but now at forty I just take it in stride and move on.
 Kazot

Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 187
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/21/2008 10:48:59 AM
I have no problem with it.

Some of the best dates and the closest to "THE ONE" started with her contacting me. I think.

It takes a load of the guy knowing she already has some interest in him.
 fireman2470

Joined: 3/15/2008
Msg: 188
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/21/2008 2:40:42 PM
Thats fine! Some men are shy and you getting the ball rolling may be a good thing! Most other dating sites will at least allow you to "wink" of otherwise show an interest. This works well , if someone shows me an interest, I wouldn't hesitate contacting them if I was interested too!
 Mrwrong37

Joined: 2/12/2008
Msg: 189
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/22/2008 6:25:21 AM
you want to know WHy men wish women would contact us first? Here is why:::

Hey if you see unread deleted don't be disappointed, some users (.01%) get 100 new emails a day if they have a great picture up. People like that don't have time to read your message even if they wanted to. Check out your entire contact history HERE
More Email -->1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25
Sent To Subject Date Sent Read


I do not smoke!!! 3/22/2008 510 AM Read Deleted
ok 3/22/2008 522 AM Unread
The answer is Yes!!!!! 3/22/2008 334 AM Unread Deleted
STEWIE!!!! 3/22/2008 2:02:53 AM Unread Deleted
cant read this guy 3/22/2008 159 AM Unread Deleted
you asked for a review 3/22/2008 119 AM Unread Deleted
italiangirl18 Ive been to italy 3/21/2008 11:04:27 PM Unread Deleted
How do you guys do it??? 3/21/2008 11:03:19 PM Unread Deleted
well 3/21/2008 847 PM Read Deleted
hi from the central valley 3/21/2008 829 PM Unread Deleted
hi 3/21/2008 807 PM Read
a comment on your profile 3/21/2008 641 PM Read Deleted
Good men 3/21/2008 626 PM Unread Deleted
your profile 3/21/2008 634 PM Read Deleted
your question 3/21/2008 604 PM Unread Deleted
Hello from modesto 3/21/2008 417 PM Unread Deleted
pretty people get overlooked too 3/21/2008 420 PM Unread Deleted
oh well 3/21/2008 424 PM Read Deleted
OK SO........... 3/21/2008 422 PM Unread Deleted
Okay 3/21/2008 420 PM Read Deleted

The is only TWO pages!!!!!
 Glenn24

Joined: 10/14/2006
Msg: 190
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/22/2008 6:34:26 AM
Everyone loves to be messaged. In the history of the world I doubt a guy has ever been freaked out by being noticed by a girl. In fact ask any good history teacher.
 elimccl

Joined: 7/8/2007
Msg: 191
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/22/2008 7:25:07 AM
I don't mind, but I've yet to receive a message from a woman that I've found the least bit attractive. As cruel as that sounds, when I get a message, I know it's not going to be a supermodel. The most attractive women on this site have likely never clicked on the search button. So I don't mind, but I sort of grimace when I see a new message. Insensitive, but honest.
 bralda-him

Joined: 8/15/2007
Msg: 192
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/22/2008 11:02:13 AM
Dam Mrwrong37, I thought I had it bad when I was looking. They would at least read most of my mail. Though none seemed to like to delete my messages or reply to them. I often wondered why so many girls keep messages in there inbox for soo long.

To answer the OP's question, girls should email guys. Most guys are fed up with girls not reading or ignoring there emails that they may welcome a girl emailing them. And if not, they should be polite enough to say they are not interested. Only one in every 50 girls has thus far sent me an email back stating they are not interested.
 rara_avis77

Joined: 5/27/2007
Msg: 193
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/22/2008 1:49:44 PM
Of course we like it when a girl contacts us first. Women like it when men contact them first- we're not that much different from you. I don't even send out messages any more because I don't have time to read 50 women's profiles and message 50 women every day just so I'll get one to respond. If women sent out more first contacts it would make it a lot easier for us guys.
 HDynasty81

Joined: 3/10/2008
Msg: 194
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/22/2008 3:31:33 PM
Damn Mrwrong that does suck a lot, though I can't say I didn't have those happen to me as well. Especially when I try to use a clever topic header, I still get the dreaded Unread/Read Deleted message.

So yeah it can be a bit demoralizing sometimes when you get a whole slew of Read/Unread Deleted messages in your inbox when trying to contact women.

But just stay positive, I know I am.
 Mozard

Joined: 7/31/2007
Msg: 195
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/22/2008 4:35:43 PM
I prefer it that way .. I always wonder if I'm invading when I speak first.
 rara_avis77

Joined: 5/27/2007
Msg: 196
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/23/2008 9:17:35 AM
A lot of women still have the attitude that the man should always be the one to make the first move so I don't think there will be a paradigm shift any time soon.
 jurupa

Joined: 2/12/2008
Msg: 197
What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/23/2008 5:29:33 PM

A lot of women still have the attitude that the man should always be the one to make the first move so I don't think there will be a paradigm shift any time soon.
With females out numbering guys population wise, and equality between the sexes gets closer, I bet you will see more and more females making the first move.
 Clarke96623

Joined: 10/15/2006
Msg: 198
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/23/2008 6:22:05 PM
She'll have to because I'm done sending first contact.
 Brad7777

Joined: 2/6/2007
Msg: 199
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/23/2008 7:50:51 PM
If you think that you are a match with him, go for it.
 TallAndDark68123

Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 200
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What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?
Posted: 3/23/2008 7:55:08 PM
read/delete
read/delete
repeat 1000 times
Done

I think men understands how this effects them so any woman who contact them will not get the same treatment. Ladys go for it!
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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > What do guys think about a girl contacting them first?