| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 4:14:20 PM | i wish i knew the answer to this it never made sense to me. Why be ashamed wear your maturity proudly.
so i have began asking for id.
well that really isn't working out to well, cause then the guy ask for mine in return. I don't care for my id photo at all.
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 4:43:27 PM | People lie ~ because they can ~ some ~ would rather lie then tell the truth
but most lie for a reason, ~ Myself ~ not all~ but many people my age, ~~ looks ~ act ~ and carries their self not unlike my grandparents ~ so I want to lie ~ too !!!!!!
lie like hell ~ would you not? ~ There is something going on at middle age thats just plain unkind to 50% or so of us. ~ It's awful!!!
and if you are just looking at the numbers ~ you'll be misled ~ for the real age will lie too.
I've got a house guest, she 52 ~ and going on 80 ~
people lie to get around profile restrictions ~
So did you learn anything? ~ I doubt it ~ you're most likly are just protesting!
I've got a few protest of my own ~ but it won't do anyone any good ~ just a waaa waaa!
But if I was to pick just one ~ it's be the early photo shots ~ you know the ones I'm talking about ~ but I really don't mind ~ just try to stay with-in 50 lbs, I know you were a beautiful woman ~ and that same woman is still there.
I don't met ladies cold turkey ~ knowing little about them ~ I know how you are ~
or at least can be ~ Sooo ~ I do visit and really do know someone ~ before I'd consider investing time and my attention ~ I like them already ~before I met them ~ regardless what they look like or how old they are. ~
You might consider doing the same ~ dar | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 4:50:11 PM | Yep, women do it all the time and some even tell you right in their profiles that they lied just to appear in your searchs.
I figure that if they start off not respecting my wishes they are never going to respect my wishes so I just click next and go on. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 5:01:23 PM | Heh,.. I lie about My age all the time.. What nice-looking 30-40 yr old woman would go out with me, if the found out I was actually 79??!.. ooOOOops!..DAMN! I HATE it when that happens!   | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 5:18:09 PM | OP don't lose faith. Just know you are not the only one.
I too believe that if a person is not truthful on the basics of their person then there is a noticeable gap in honesty and thus integrity. I've run across a couple of women in my area who "fudge" their age on their profiles supposedly to insure they show up on searches by those looking for a younger woman. My opinion is that if the seeker is wise enough they will include the actual older age at some point realizing that some people's lifestyle will cause them to age better than others. If the seeker does not realize that then will they really appreciate the one that they find?
Also in my experience, I've only met one good lawyer as far as I can tell. He was a real estate attorney and specifically stayed out of the other lawyering to maintain his integrity. That I can respect. The other lawyers I have met seem like they will say anything they can get away with to get what they want. Whether it is to win a case or....
Good luck to you OP. Practice patience and you will have perseverance. With patience you will find the one you seek. That's my thought and I'm sticking to it!
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 5:40:59 PM | lie about your age is no good because you get older each year so if they don't like my age who cares am not going to lie to get men am me that is all why lie i hate a when a man or woman lie life is what it is just live it happy | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 5:41:11 PM | MSG 2
People think that if they fudge details to get past your criteria and you spend time with them, you'll forgive them for what they lied for because they were so wonderful.
I totally agree with this.
I met a man whose profile said he was 54. He said he was 56. He looked over 60. If the age he claimed on his profile and the age he claimed in real life were the same, I wouldn't have doubted his age , but . . .
By the way, age liars, POF automatically turns over your age when your birthday rolls around, so don't blame the inaccurate age on POF. Also, those of you who have an age in your stats but confess in your profile blurb that you are older . . . what's with that? If you put in the wrong year, it is EASILY fixed.
On the other hand, my profile says I am a few pounds overweight and I am. Men ARGUE with me about it, saying my pictures (all very recent) don't show any extra weight. The pounds are in my bottom half and I am NOT going to post a picture of my butt.
Why then, when some men meet me, do they seem a bit surprised? I am honest and aboveboard and am not fishing for protestations that I am not 15 pounds overweight. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 5:51:36 PM | The actual reality is that in this younger than yesterday world way too many people are age sensitive. Probably only a little less than weight sensitive. But, you can't hide the weight. I think that everyone should be allowed a pass on age since so many of you all dismiss people out of hand for such a meaningless measure. The fact is that age is really just a number. There are plenty of people who act their age and plenty more who couldn't act "grown-up" if they tried. I presume most of it is vanity, so everyone should understand that. Men have just as sensitive egos as women in these areas so cut everyone a break and stop being so severe in judging people by a number rather than some real factor. The fact that someone lies about their age DOES NOT mean they will automatically lie about anything. It really is a case of ego bruising in a world of tough judgements. Relax all and meet some more interesting people. Age usually means experience and you all know you are more likeley to reject someone who is older just because it makes you forget your own age and aging process. So, come on people, stop it!
Chris | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 6:02:58 PM | There is no exucse for lying about your age I dont care how much you want to whine on about societies sensetivities.
Lying about your age is chidish imo. If you don't like judgemental people then all the more reason to tell them your age so you can vett them out. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 6:05:35 PM | | I know some people that have done it and they got away with it for a period of time. Not sure why they do it, she's bound to see your birth cert or license eventually! | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 6:05:43 PM | Something’s you can stretch, blame it on the turkey. Age and height deception is impossible to get out of; there is no gray area it’s too easy to check. I could say that I am like 38 because I could maybe pass for it. But it won’t work because you could just go to my profile and see that I am a young looking 45. I better go measure myself again | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 6:16:09 PM |
I could say that I am like 38 because I could maybe pass for it. But it won’t work because you could just go to my profile and see that I am a young looking 45.
Hey, as I was telling someone the other day, I could EASILY pass for 54. In fact, I could walk up to someone on the street and say, "I am 54," and that person wouldn't blink an eye.
Be careful in accepting what people tell you (the editorial "you") about looking younger. People flatter and they outright lie! | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 6:19:14 PM |
The fact that someone lies about their age DOES NOT mean they will automatically lie about anything.
They have already lied about something thus they might or are perhaps likely to lie about "anything." How can we know what to trust and what not to trust? Thus for some (or many?) of us there is a tendency to trust nothing once they have shown that they will lie... period. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 6:19:21 PM |
I think that's one problem with internet dating-- you know exact info about a people that isn't really important. And then you're able to, either consciously or due to the matching criteria you select, reject them. The internet is forcing people to bend the truth because of that. Correct on the first part, wrong on the last part. Rather than forcing lies, internet dating is forcing people to be smarter about their criteria and acceptance or else they may miss out on many good opportunities.
Many people are way too willing to forgive lies, but not willing to forgive the truth.
Things like age, height, etc on your profile provide a great opportunity for pure unadultered truth. These are things that wouldn't normally be known when you meet in person. These things only have minor importance in a relationship, but some people treat them as extremely important on these sites. They aren't willing to forgive the fact that someone is 5'11" instead of 6'0" or that s/he's 40 instead of 39. Some people are using these facts poorly, so others lie to get around their automatic-reject filter. In doing so, they show you a complete lack of respect in assuming that you aren't an accepting person and can't accept them for who they are.
Some people are just plain insecure and that's why they lie. They don't like it that they're 40, so they say they're 35.
By the way, most people assume that I am between the late twenties to mid-thirties. Lying about my age saves me a lot of public embarassment because a lot people have no manners and like to tell anyone within hearing how old I really am. I hate that! Bingo!
does one fault forfeit the match on your court? I'm wondering if he got the chance to tell you the truth about anything else.
I have another question, come to think of it. What did you decide not to put in your profile, and then not to tell the fellow, about yourself One fault? Lieing about your own age points out many possible faults: One, you aren't who you say you are. Two, you don't respect the other person. Three, you're insecure. Four, you're dishonest. Not all of these apply to every liar, but most do. How many strikes is it till you're out?
As far as not disclosing everything... that's totally different. Part of your profile is a "fill in the blank with the 100% truth" section. The other part of the profile is the "say some more" section. The "say some more" section is where you try to highlight your good qualities. You don't have to tell the person your life story there, and I don't think anyone would read it if you did. Sorry, nobody is going to cover everything in a couple paragraphs and they shouldn't even if they could.
Who knows...maybe he just wanted to add intrigue...let himself out slowly, verses laying it all out....not so black n white...show his own particular sense of humor As in, haha, I lied about my age, aren't I funny? I guess I just have a different sense of humor.
The profile asks for a few black and white facts: Location, Birthdate, Age, Height, hair color, ethnicity, smoke, drink, drugs, body type, religion, profession, what you're seeking, do you have children, do you want children. That's it! A few of them don't have clear definitions (body type, what you're seeking), but all are designed to be basic facts. The rest of you, the stuff that makes you interesting, is all left up to you to "add intrigue" and "let out slowly". There's no need to lie about the simple facts to do that.
Sorry, P-Pooch, but the only people who will care are the Gotcha players, the scorekeepers and judgment mongers.
The rest of us take people as they come, and you know what? We find that, once people know they are accepted, their defenses start to come down, along with whatever exaggerations and distortions they've relied upon theretofore to feel safe. Or, they learn that they can lie to you about things, and that they can get away with it even after they're caught. "Ohh whoops. Yeah, I actually did have an STD, sorry about spreading it to you. I just wanted to try unprotected sex again. Forgive me?"
Why try to accept someone's BS when you can accept someone's reality instead? You don't need to be accepting of lies in order to be an accepting person. Some people have insecurities or things they regret, but will still be honest about those things. Then they give you the opportunity to be accepting of them. Liars completely take away your ability to be accepting and have already judged you not to be.
In his profile he states very clearly he is honest. Someone who claims to be honest in a profile means absolutely nothing. Some actually are. Others lie about being honest. Never use their claim of honesty to be an indication of their own honesty. However, it is probably a good indicator that they will be very unhappy if you are dishonest to them.
Finally, I hate it when people try to guilt or badger others into being accepting of lies/liars. They say something like "what, you can't accept it that I lied to you? You're just not an accepting person." So, the liar did something wrong and instead tries to turn it around. They accuse you of doing something bad. Wife beaters tend to use the same tactics. They blame the wife for doing something wrong that causes her to get beaten. They make the wives feel guilty and that they deserve it. It really shows the character of someone who tries to use the guilt tactics.
Tolerance should be saved for tolerable things. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 6:57:54 PM | I just don't see the point in lying about one's age.
a man had his age a good 5 years younger in his profile and when we started talking he said what his real age was, and I asked him why in the hell did he lie on his profile and he said that younger women wouldn't respond (I was 55 at the time lol!) and I said that he should let the women be the judge and not start out with a lie.
you just might get caught in this lie and what does that say for your character? | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 7:08:21 PM |
My mother told me I looked younger.
You do! You do!
Silly ol' Gwen, what the hell does she know? She lies all the time. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 7:08:55 PM | | I met a man on this site who said he was 62, when we met he fessed up he was either 72 or 76, can't remember. I said, "you're gonna piss off a whole lot of women lying" he said, "it was a typo", right, it's still says 62. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 7:10:11 PM | I don't. I'm 46 and whether or not a guy thinks I look my age is really based on his experience and expectation. I don't lie about my pics either and yes they're current.
I did meet a guy once who had been using his SON'S pic, and was claiming to be 42. In person, it was instantly obvious that he was actually about 66 and didn't look at all like his son's pic - regardless of whatever resemblance his family might have noticed. Needless to say that didn't go over well. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 7:22:59 PM | I don't think its a deal breaker myself. I've dated a couple of guys who lied about their age. They didn't lie about their height, weight, any other parts. It was okay with me because they were datable guys otherwise.
Its a stigma in our society and we're all judged so quickly about every little thing. I personally try not to judge a person on one fault they may have, which could be their concern of their age, and hope they will give me the same kindness. Especially if they are good people in the other areas of their life. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 7:33:03 PM | | I think some women cut men off at a certain age because they think they would look/act too old past a certain age. But, if a man thinks he looks/acts younger than his actual age he might consider it a good strategy to tell a while lie in order to get in the door, so to speak, then fess up after he has showcased himself. Either she won't mind and understand his strategy and forgive him for it if she finds him attractive or she will bite off her nose to spite her face by holding it against him....or because she needs to relax and not be such a judgemental hypocrite ( as in a sin is a sin and if lying isn't one of her's I'm sure she commits some sin or another ). And coming to the conclusion that someone will lie about anything if they do this is pure ignorance...IMO. | |
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| Why would you lie about your age?
Posted: 1/2/2008 7:34:54 PM | | one of my best friends is on match.com and she says when she put her real age which is 42 she got emails from men in their 50s and 60s. then she changed her age to 38 and told me it worked. i think that's okay, esp. since it's a few years- to put her into a different age 'bracket'... ? i've known her for years, she's not a dishonest person at all! | |
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My mother told me I looked younger.
