| A little advice for me please?
Posted: 1/2/2008 9:32:59 PM | If you have been talking/entertaining each other for 2 months and you both are on the same page (in terms of the relationship) that is odd. If she did not acknowledge the ocassions for religious reasons that I could understand. However, you stated that she is Catholic. So, I still believe it to be a bit odd/not the "norm".
Yes, you are two different people. No two people are "identical", but she should expand as to why she does not want to acknowledge them. i.e. personal choice/never has
I have a gf who's bf does not acknowledge Valentine's Day because he believes it to be overrated/Hallmark day. lol And he states that he does not need a day to take her to dinner/buy her flowers. He can do this whenever he wishes.
If she is genuinely interested in pursuing something serious with you, she should tell you WHY she feels this way. Nothing "earth shattering" about elaborating on this.
Best,
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| A little advice for me please?
Posted: 1/2/2008 10:17:02 PM | First of all, I lol at your statement of long distance being one hour away. Unless neither of you drives, that's ridiculously close.
I have to wonder how many times you've actually seen this woman and how deep her feelings for you actually are. My gut feeling says (because of this one-hour long distance thing) that she's spinelessly shining you on in an effort not to hurt your feelings. That's partly based on your statement of the relationship as it is now and partly based on her quite enigmatic answer of "We are different people," without explanation or further communication. I'll take things as stated though, and assume that she actually likes you and wants to continue in the relationship.
Obviously holidays are important to you. I am of the exact opposite camp. I'd much rather celebrate arbitrary other days and surprise my partner than rely on the greeting card and retail industries to provide me with pre-packaged opportunities. That said, you'd probably do best to get to the bottom of not wanting to talk rather than whether it has to do with a specific holiday. I can only speak from if I were in the situation, so please forgive me for that; however, I am going to make the assumption that your feeling of the importance of the holidays might result in spending at least some part of the expected phone call bemoaning the fact that you're not together on this grand holiday. That would cause insane amounts of eye-rolling and multi-tasking on my end, and lead me to avoid holiday phone calls as well. If all I'm going to do is listen to how much this person who has known me for two months is failing to enjoy the holiday with friends and family and is instead wallowing in his premature desire to spend every holiday with me, then I've got better things to do. I want to hear what you did to celebrate it and have fun. I want to tell you how my holiday went and how much I loved seeing my family. Instead of mourning what is not, I prefer to celebrate what is and share my joy.
Now, I'm only speaking from if I were in her position of two months into a relationship with infrequent in-person contact and an assumed set of events based on what you've said. Without details, I can't really help much beyond my own expectations and probable responses. You should probably find out from her why she doesn't want to talk to you on the phone on those specific days, though. That'd be a great place to start instead of asking lots of other people why she might be doing something... ask her! | |
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| A little advice for me please?
Posted: 1/3/2008 11:27:27 AM | Some people just don't go in for celebrating these type of things.
I wouldn't be too offended by it but it.
I'm guessing your birthday has been and gone recently and she didn't call so you were upset with her? | |
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| A little advice for me please?
Posted: 1/3/2008 11:29:51 AM | This is one of those weird situations I wouldn't get myself into, frankly. (Dude, and where in ONTARIO is an hour away "too far" and "long distance"--how long is your daily commute to work?? You can't go further to get laid? WTF?)
Anyhooo>>>>>
She is just not that into you. | |
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| A little advice for me please?
Posted: 1/3/2008 4:58:53 PM | OP....I am still trying to figure out what it is you want advise on? I am not trying to be rude, but I agree...there is not enough info to give advise.
You say you have talked for 2 months, that you have actually met and she does not contact you on special days in your life. When you asked her why, she said because you are "different people". That's when you should have said "What do you mean by "different people"? Why didn't you asked her what she meant in that statement? Only she can give you the answer.
As for 1 hour being a long distance relationship, that is not far in my opinion. Many internet dating couples live that far or more away from one another. I had a man drive 1.5 hrs every weekend for 2 years to see me. What about meeting half way at times?
I am not sure what you mean by being more than just friends? I am assuming you are intimate? Again...just not enough info.
If I was dating a man and it was more than "just friendship", I'd feel a little disappointed if he ignored special days. However...2 months and the question of what your relationship truly is, maybe it is more serious in your mind than hers.
Good luck and try asking her and let us know what she says! | |
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| A little advice for me please?
Posted: 1/3/2008 8:38:11 PM | My question is am I expecting too much of her to contact me on special dates, ie birthday, christmas etc.
Yes, I do think you are expecting too much.
I tried to ask her about this but she said that "we are different people".
She's right in saying "we are different people." We're all unique, & we all have different opinions - various issues.
if she doesn't want to recognize occasions thats her wish. My problem was her reaction to my question of why she didn't want to contact me.
My question concerns her reaction to why she didn't recognize special dates.
? If you accept that she doesn't want to recognise those occasions, then I wonder why do you have a problem with her reaction?
Am I being to sensitive about this issue or is it something else?
Perhaps? Although some occasions hold special meaning to many people, & we all enjoy & want to feel special - liked/loved, everyone isn't willing to uphold them highly, or buy into the commercialism & over-rated events, etc.- could be 10001 reasons.
The thing is; even though you might disagree - any issue, it isn't good to expect her to do something that she's not willing to do, & if you can't accept that fact then you're basically showing that you're disrespecting her - her wishes.
You may have further problems - inability to meet each others needs / requirements?
I'm thinking now may be a good time to begin discussing other issues of importance - you both. | |
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| A little advice for me please?
Posted: 5/14/2008 9:57:56 AM | 2 months isn't that long of a time, really.
if it's not a religion, i'm thinkin, maybe she's feelin like it's a bit to mushy, so soon.
to me if someone says "we r 2 different ppl" i'd be thinking, we don't match up!!
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| A little advice for me please?
Posted: 5/14/2008 10:03:06 AM | | No you're not. Its a natural thing to contact the other person on holidays. I do not understand her reasoning. If she really cares she would be overjoyed to contact you on holidays. she sounds alittle strange to me. | |
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