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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/13/2008 4:27:42 PM |
Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
I think that everyone should be licensed and visibly tagged, like dogs, so that we can see at a glance if they've passed the tests required to have sex. If they misstep, we can report them via their tag number and let the government deal with them. If they keep lying to those poor people expecting more, their sexual privileges should be revoked, with possible castration the final outcome. | |
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oshan
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Joined: 1/5/2008
Msg: 429 | |
| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/13/2008 4:36:36 PM | venusfreak, why don't you calm down and actually read the OP...slowly...and breathe....and then come back and write a post. I do not agree with what you have stated here at all when you state the following to the OP: "Hate to say it, but you've just made yourself look extremely foolish. Are you kidding me?!!?? As far as I know, we are all able to say the simple words yes and no, we are all able to leave, get in our cars drive away, call a cab, walk to the bus station. This is where I really do have to take the other side because oops my clothes fell off and my legs accidentally spread has got to the most pathetic and stupid thing I've ever heard! I'm sure we've all made mistakes and have regrets but trying to blame it on someone else is absolutely retarded. I'm not sure if your friends are vulnerable, stupid or both. Rape is rape, and bad judgment is just that."
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First of all, the OP did not make a fool of herself at all, and what does the ability to say 'no' have to do with the OP's post? Secondly, how rude to surmise that her friends, who were deceived and lied to, are stupid. Yes, they were definintely vulnerable...as is anyone who comes up agains a SOCIOPATH!! Lastly, your statements seem typical of the statements one would expect to get from the sociopath in a pathetic attempt to argue the case for his/her innocence. Yes, I'm sure it is not only men who participate in this appalling deception.
Lastly, to the OP, I agree...there ought to be a law against this type of blatant usery/abuse. A broken heart can cause all sorts of mental, emotional and physical problems that can have long-lasting results. I think there should definitely be some sort of effective recourse that a victim of this abuse could take. Thank you for bringing this topic up...it's a very good one! | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/13/2008 4:43:58 PM | | No I don't! That's why we were given the ability to speak and say no. I personally believe whether your male or female unless your a complete moron you have the ability to pickup on a player. Sounds like maybe your friends are looking in the wrong places or maybe they are the one's that wanted more than sex and gave in the see where it would go. | |
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oshan
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Joined: 1/5/2008
Msg: 431 | |
| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/13/2008 4:47:03 PM | lord essex writes: "Yes there should be a law.
There used to be a law about those who promised marriage and didn't come through.
Those who promise or pretend love/feelings/emotion - or at least a semblance of it - in order to score sexually, should be punished for it. Somehow they should be punished, because they are NOT human. They are predatory animals. "
THANK YOU....I could not agree MORE!!! | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/13/2008 4:54:32 PM | Nope.
There's no law against being a **stard. There's no law against being selfish.
There's no law that says someone who says they love you will still love you in 10 years time. There's no law that says you'll never be hurt by someone.
Making "good behavior" mandated by law is a horrifying concept.
Guys promising the world and then vanishing is bad and wrong and thoughtless, but illegal? Terrifying concept.
And for the record... if you go out on a few dates and you like someone and sleep with them and they ditch you. Yeah... it sucks. But to call that "abuse" seems to be taking it a little too seriously.
Speaking of which... sociopath? Rude and selfish maybe... but sociopath is again taking things way too far.
Somehow they should be punished, because they are NOT human. They are predatory animals.
What is with you people and excessive rhetoric? Bad people are people too. Why do we have to ascribe anything we don't like to somehow being "inhuman". Now guys who try to get laid are "predatory animals"?! Frankly while this behavior is thoughtless and self-centred and manipulative... I couldn't personally think of behaviour that's MORE human. | |
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oshan
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Joined: 1/5/2008
Msg: 435 | |
| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/13/2008 5:48:39 PM | Well, mr. whitegold, you are entitled to your opinion...everyone has one. However, you might want to investigate the facts before you make your opinions known, and before you state that what I said is taking things way too far. Please refer to the following link: http://www.findlaci2003.us/sociopath.html if you want the entire article. If not, here's an excerpt to back up the fact that there are lots of sociopaths out there who are preying, as we speak, on innocent, vulnerable people. I guess in your world that's just okey dokey, but in mine and many others', it isn't! Furthermore, unlike you and lots of other misinformed individuals, I prefer to call and ace an ace, and a sociopath a sociopath. And I do not appreciate comments from uninformed, arrogant individuals such as yourself attempting to contradict me. If you don't know what your are talking about...please restrain yourself.
"...An estimated 3% of all adult males have this sociopathic disorder. (The antisocial
personality disorder is uncommon among women.) Only a small fraction of this
percentage actually develop into violent criminals. Most sociopathic individuals
are able to control their disorder within the boundaries of social tolerability.
They are considered only 'socially obnoxious' or hateful personalities, and every one of us knows of someone who fits the description. Corrupt and callous politicians, social or career fast climbers, authoritarian leaders, abusing and aggressive persons, etc., are among them.
A common characteristic is that they engage systematically in deception and manipulation of others for personal gain. In fact, many successful and adapted non-violent sociopaths can be found in our society. An NIMH epidemiologic study reported that only 47% of those who met the SPD criteria had a significant arrest record. The most relevant events for these persons occur in the area of job problems, domestic violence, traffic offenses,and severe marital difficulties.
More easily recognized and studied are the sociopathic individuals with histories of violent criminal behavior. As much as 15-25% of society's inmate population show many traits of this disorder. It is these incarcerated individuals as well as individuals in mental institutions on which most of the research on antisocial personality disorder is based.
The sociopath could be the intelligent and very successful businessman that goes
home each night and abuses his family. He could be the temperamental man that visits the bar regularly and who often gets into brawl." | |
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oshan
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Joined: 1/5/2008
Msg: 436 | |
| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/13/2008 9:55:27 PM | Btw, there's book out there called "101 Lies Men Tell Woman"....written by a woman with a Ph.D. (I can't remember her name, sorry, and I left the book at my office). The writer has done her research, and it's a real eye-opener to say the least. Sadly, it might not surprise you that the most commonly used lie is "I love you", and yes the lie IS used to procure willing sex from the victim....admitted by the black-hearted predators themselves.  | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/13/2008 10:11:58 PM | WOW!
Being "tricked" into a sexual encounter seems imposable to me!
IMO ...you teach people how to treat you, and if you are making a choice to have sex with someone then that is your choice. It is hard enough to convict people of a sex crime without adding the "I've been played law"
You can make a choice to have sex before you are say married and then you have to own your choice. Now I understand the pain and hurt one can cause by blowing sunshine up the butt, but to try and make a law 
You can only try and learn from past experiance and go from there. | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/14/2008 11:52:24 AM | Hey Oshan,
Okay, let's look at it your way.
Now, as long as we're doing that, let's lock up half the men in the world and start building prisons for half the women. I mean, for every woman that feels she was tricked into having sex (yeah, like that time I got tricked into eating an entire blueberry pie...the gun was touching my ear I tell you !) there's a guy who's paying child support or alimony. And yet, in both cases all they had to do was....*drum roll*....NOTHING. That's right ! All they had to do was NOT take off their clothes and participate in something they clearly wanted to participate in.
Men simply don't wait months for sex if that's all they have on their minds. If you actually believe you're getting the whole story here that's fine but the rest of us know better. If he spent months devising some plot just to get down her pants then he's one patient guy. Better yet, I'd venture so far as to say that with an effort like that he deserves to get some action. Of course I can say that without the slightest bit of sarcasm because frankly, I don't believe for a second that it happened like that at all.
Besides , don't women get horny in your world ? I was sure that pretty much everybody did. If she didn't ever feel that natural pang of lust then I'm guessing it was actually HIM who was getting tricked then wouldn't you say ? After all, if she'd said to him "I never want to have sex in my life" then what rational person is going to stick around for that ? | |
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| In the case of intentional use of drugs or alcohol - yes
Posted: 1/14/2008 12:14:55 PM | Yes,
I think if a man or woman intentionally gives a person a substance which affects their judgement or mental capacities for the explicit purpose of sexual gratification, there is grounds for criminal charges. The problem in "date rape" is that it is difficult to discern if the complaining party really had something done to them against their will (at the time of the encounter.)
By the way, I am available to be manipulated and deceived ladies. I have lived a monkish life so long that monasteries from around the continent have sent me pre-approved membership cards in the mail. Also, my brain is so deprived of nurturing from the fairer gender, that when I hear the word "sex" my brain automatically reads it as a number in the Swedish language ... you know ... en, tvo, tre, fyra, fem, sex, sjo, oto, nio and tio - etc.
Brother Richard from the Monastery in Talking Rock, Jawja | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/14/2008 12:53:57 PM | As some one else on this forum mentioned, then there would have to be laws against all kinds of deceit. Advertising is often deceitful, how many times have you been disappointed by something you have bought after seeing an ad? Sex and love have the same issues except the stakes are often higher. Buyer beware!
Do we really need more lawyers? especially in the bedroom!
At the same time, we cannot be too cautious and mistrustful or we will shy out of a relationship before one has a chance to start. We have to take prospective dates or companions at their word until we have seen otherwise. Most people can be seen though easily, I believe, it is a skill one must work on.
Usually a con man (or woman) will lead you on with something that seems to good to be true. This applies to every kind of con, sexual or otherwise. You want to believe something that is too good to be true and actually fool yourself into believing it. When I am interested in and attracted to a woman, I make it clear early on that I desire a sexual relationship and do wish to have sex at some point when it seems appropriate to both of us. If I feel 'strung along', then I am gone | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/14/2008 3:27:37 PM | I have resisted making this comment, but, it's been on my mind...
While I understand the need for sexual compatibility...
Somehow, it just doesn't make me feel any better if a guy dumps me because I sucked in bed?....lol...( by his standards)
A lot of men on POF, and this thread, say this like it's no big deal...well, I tried you out, you failed, oh well....I think maybe they can never see this from a female point of view...
I don't know, but, my inclination is to say that if you get to know someone, and your first encounter isn't earth shattering, if you like the person, why couldn't a few more times, and some discussion help the situation...maybe men are never nervous, or shy, the first time, or maybe they know all there is to know about it, or they can read minds about what a person likes or desires?
I like to believe I know what I'm doing, and I'm pretty open minded..but, I could never see myself dumping someone I actually liked just because sex the first time wasn't the best ever..or, maybe, never having a relationship fail because of sex ( or lack of it), I can't relate.
Now, after some effort, if things just don't "mesh", that would be different. But, this one time and you're out seems brutal...
And since marriage isn't one of my goals, manipulating with sex to get it, doesn't apply. Besides which...I'm not the kind of woman who even knows how to manipulate with it, nor would I want too...
I guess, some respect for my feelings is what I would like... | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/14/2008 5:27:59 PM | i don't think there should be "laws," but women have to be extra careful about who they get involved with. the truth is, many men are too cheap to pay for professionals and are simply looking for sex. many of them misrepresent themselves as being interested in a real relationship when they are really only interersted in a sexual one. that can be really really hurtful to a woman when she discovers that she has been lied to. this is too bad, and it certainly makes it harder for the nice guys out there who are trying to be honest and meet a nice woman. as far as the sex trolls, they are awful and cruel. they hurt people then slink away as they say "gee..iam sorry..." but never fear, there is a special place in dante's hell for these type of men, and based on the contrapasso (punishment fits the crime) i am sure there will be some appropriate punishment along the lines of... oh i don't know... repeated castration perhaps? hhhmmmmm? lol!
lol!
lara | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/14/2008 5:39:50 PM | OP: If you can't run with the big dogs stay on the porch. I'm a pretty simple minded person but I can't be tricked into bed with those three little words I LOVE YOU unless that's what I wanted.
What about women that trick men into bed? Man ask: Are you protected? Woman replies yes? Outcome: Woman turns up pregnant. Outcome2: Man pays through his nose for the next 18 years. Should that be a crime?
Conclusion: Think with the head on your shoulders, not the one between your legs.
Women are just as bad as men(much as I hate to admit it) | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/14/2008 5:49:25 PM | I don't think so. The law can't protect your friends from being stupid. They will continue to have sex with the wrong people.
Your friends are foolish for allowing a player to use them or maybe just bitter over a break-up. You can't revoke your consent after the fact. Live and learn and go out and try again a little wiser than before.
I know you say it happened to your friends but from your responses on here I'm pretty sure that you were the one who got dumped when you had wedding bells ringing in your head.
Maybe we can make a law against women who order expensive meals and then won't have sex. Isn't that deciet? I mean I took a shower and even brushed my teeth. I want my $100 back. 
Your example of a car salesman that makes a deal for $10,000 and wants $20,000 after the paperwork is done is a pretty stupid analogy. If the paperwork is for $10,000 that's what you pay. If he made it out for 20 then you would be stupid to sign it. The price isn't in the fine print. A person who ignores the obvious will get screwed every time and I don't mean just at the car lot. | |
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| Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters!
Posted: 1/14/2008 8:25:58 PM | If I can speak for what I believe welshfuchsia is saying that all of you are taking so literally is: some people are looking for love and want to find it so bad, that a person can tell them lies like "I love you, I feel so alone when you're not with me, I've never felt this way about anyone before, etc, etc,etc." and the person they are telling this to is so innocent or trusting or inexperienced (not like you hardcores out there) that they believe it. Never knowing all was spoken for just a romp in the bed.
And yes, I wish there was a law against it. I know there can't be, so please don't give me all the technical reasons why there can't be a law for it.
Just a wish if it could protect the innocent.
Not literally, just a wish.
This is just my opinion, but feel free to come on with the punches anyhow.
Welshfuchsia, if I have misunderstood anything you stated in your post, I apologize
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