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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/29/2008 4:04:02 PM |
Personally, I think the situation I spoke of was a big enough red flag that that girl did not in fact deserve 'another chance'. You don't leave kids in a parking lot in Michigan (or anywhere) on New Year's Eve while you are inside drinking. That's downright criminal.
You have that right. Frankly if this is a true story rather than hypothetical I'd be very displeased with BOTH, her for being so selfish and irresponsible and him for not having the brains to report this trash to the cops and child services right away.
: Men don't want to deal with the numerous issues involved in raising someone elses children. There is a cost involved in raising children not to mention a time element.....then there are the legal issues....do you really want to become the legal gaurdian of kid or two kids that are not yours....and by extension by liable for child support!!!....if the relationship fails! I sure hope you are speaking just of Canada, as none of this applies in the good old USA.
Canadian laws suck, what can I say.
Whoopsie, you are mistaken it does apply in some states, just not all. Ask anyone in Washington for example. We do agree that this particular law is not well thought out though. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/29/2008 5:52:59 PM |
Whoopsie, you are mistaken it does apply in some states, just not all. Ask anyone in Washington for example. We do agree that this particular law is not well thought out though.
Well, forgive me, I have never heard of such law in the states...
I keep posting because I would like to think that I am not the minority.
There is no rule book that once you become a single parent, then you do x y and x to anyone you date, etc. We are all human beings, with our own issues, and expectations of relationships. We are NOT all the same.
Those of us that are not idiots understand why some would be hesitant to get into a relationship with someone already with a child, etc. I think those of you that have had bad relationships actually have been dealing with just a plain idiot, regardless of their child status... | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/29/2008 6:02:59 PM |
Those of us that are not idiots understand why some would be hesitant to get into a relationship with someone already with a child, etc. I think those of you that have had bad relationships actually have been dealing with just a plain idiot, regardless of their child status...
I haven't had bad relationships with single parents. And you have a point about them being just "plain idiots", but the plain idiots that hide it better than most are just sooooo much easier to cut and run on when they reveal their nature when it is just one person you are ditching.
Theoretically it would really suck to actually cultivate a friendship with her short people and later have to bail on the mom thereby confusing the child. A child that is completely innocent of his/her parents faults I might add, that an empathic person could concievably end missing aswell as having no wish to emotionally trouble the innocent person.
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/29/2008 6:11:22 PM |
but the plain idiots that hide it better than most are just sooooo much easier to cut and run on when they reveal their nature when it is just one person you are ditching.
Well, see, I did not think of it that way, because I have never had privilege of dating someone that was the least bit concerned really truly about my childs feelings. They pushed to meet my child for purely selfish reasons and were not the least bit concerned about the effects her bonding with them would have if we did not work out...Of course, I did not find out their true nature until later into the relationships..
It is refreshing to actually hear a man discuss the effects on the children.. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/29/2008 6:26:35 PM | Lots of great moms (or single parents for that matter)
I've said before, guys, if you are interested in her and she has children, its a package deal
And the kids (safety and welfare) come first as it should be, thats just the way it goes. Not only have i been involved with someone who had children, i'm thankful for the experience even though it may not have worked out, i believe it helps prepare you for the time one might become a dad.
So no, i dont bother wondering why. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 4:46:58 AM |
well I"m looking for a single mom,have good job and very dependable. if you know anyone that could use someone like me please send them my way :D
Stick around... there are plenty who will line up, to as you put it, "use someone like me"
Better bring more to the table than just a good job and dependability, or you are seriously going to become short changed in the long run.
A woman wrote me a note, these are her words.....
As far as women who tease... I think a lot of younger women are truly golddiggers. They will do anything for a free meal or free drinks including tease a guy all night long.
Like I said, all you have to do is stick around.... | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 6:05:32 AM |
And the same goes for women without kids. Bearing children does not directly affect one's desire to use someone or not use someone. Why can't we ever clarify that?
LOL... I never said it was not. Clarification between women with or without kids I dont think is necessary. It was a general statement by a woman about women.
Apply that to the poster I replied to, not to a single mom... so why is it you feel the need to take up the flag, when it was not directed toward you specifically there Simm, or single mothers??
You're in danger of following in the footsteps of Johne.... Always plugging your point in where it isnt necessary... | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 6:06:51 AM | | hey not all single men r against single mums and there r so many single parents out there now that most ppl dont mind that u have kids already i guess its just a matter of meeting the rite person and being upfront with them from the begining | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 9:28:00 AM |
hey not all single men r against single mums and there r so many single parents out there now that most ppl dont mind that u have kids already i guess its just a matter of meeting the rite person and being upfront with them from the begining
You're correct in your surmise... Well said.
The issue seems to come about when the single guys who dont have kids, decline or refuse to date the single moms... that is when the single moms seem to feel they have the right to say we are cowards, not "real men", or dont have the stones to stand up to the situation.
THAT is what I find offensive.... I understand that "life lessons" happen, and sometimes those lessons leave more than just the lesson learned. But on occasion, when there is obviously a lack of forthought or consideration of responsibility.. I would run from that in a seconds notice ...
Kind of like Simms "situation".... There isnt any 'right' answer... for some guys, we see the potential for the drama, and simply say NO... But then again, we're branded as not being real men, because we didnt step up to that batters box... apparently a batters box that has already had a few 'home run' hitters.... | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 10:03:45 AM | | I agree that your child is a number one priority, but there's nothing wrong with sending your child to gram's for the weekend and making someone else number 1 for the weekend. I think guys, especially those with no attachments, have to think things through first. They're trying to concentrate on the person they're dating - but that's hard when you've got a child too. So taking things slow, being honest from the get go and above all - I like to say that they're dating me - not my son, if we hit it off, a few months down the road, they may meet my son - but it's not necessary. A new relationship has enough of it's own speedbumps to get over without trying to make this person a dad. And in most cases, single parents (me being one of them) are not looking for a dad - my son has one of those, I'm looking for a bf for me - not someone to pigeon hole in a father role. It takes 9 months to have your child for a reason - that gives you time to adjust to the idea of being a parent - so it also takes time for a significant other to see how they fit into the life of you and your little one. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 10:19:42 AM |
well I"m looking for a single mom,have good job and very dependable. if you know anyone that could use someone like me please send them my way :D
Stick around... there are plenty who will line up, to as you put it, "use someone like me"
Sorry, I beg to differ....it looks to me like we're talking about single moms there. Dontchya think? | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 11:00:22 AM | | WOW!!!!!! I haven't been around for 40 or 50 pages, you guys are unbelieveable. Johne are you xeroxing those posts, I told you pal, you gotta get a life, step away from the computer and see the sunshine. Believe me try it you'll like it. Now back on point, everyone keeps hurling bricks at single moms, has someone decided that they aren't human? IF YOU DON'T WANT TO DATE THEM, THEN DON'T!!!!!!!!!! They probably wouldn't be comfortable with you either, due to your own issues with their kids. People meet people, we cannot help who we are attracted to or not attracted to. If a single mom meets a single guy with/without kids, if she is attracted then she will try and date him. Now don't tell me the majority of men if attracted to a woman will not date her due to children, it just isn't so. Look around you, see how many blended families there are. I agree it is more difficult to date them, your always going to be second to the kids, time availability, costs if relationship should go somewhere. If you are looking for someone to love and find it with a single parent and walk away, then you should have your head examined. I understand if they are users leave, if they are poor parents get out, if they can't make anytime for you or enough time for you. Then you must decide if you can live with what you get, if not bail before you or her gets hurt. But it is hard enough with or without kids to find someone special who ignites that spark in you and you in them. Oh one more thing before I leave Johne, please don't answer this with the "laws of Canada child support thing" if the law sucks that much leave Canada or start a revolution up there. Probably a better use of your time than staying on this thread and bashing single moms. My 2 cents, Bob | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 5:03:22 PM |
Stick around... there are plenty who will line up, to as you put it, "use someone like me"
Now, why do you have to be nasty...An opinion is one thing the nastiness towards the whole lot of single mothers is another thing... | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 5:55:39 PM | Quirky it was poorly worded but I think the point was missed. That person isn't stating YOU are the person that will use them. So it isn't an attack on you since you exclude yourself from the group of "users". Personally I wouldn't expend the energy defending the ones that will happily use another for gain, but that just me.
I would say that anyone with "SUCKER" tattooed on their forehead IS going to be used or abused by SOMEONE, not necessarily a single parent. The additional problems created if it happens to be a single parent that is the one using the "sucker" have already been done to death here so I won't repeat them.
Also there are a few single parents I could name running around here posting and claiming to speak for all women, all single parents, and all men (sometimes even all 3 when unless they happen to be a hermaphrodite they can't possible begin to speak for both genders even from an individual standpoint). All too often the decent people of the group these wack-jobs claim to represent are for the most part silent(much as many single parents here are silent when multiple guys get financially raped by a few predatory women), and that silence is often taken as approval, by courts, politicians and even potential dates.
OFF TOPIC: There is another thread with a few of the nutjobs I mentioned and already surprisingly members of the group they claim to represent are taking issue with, e-mail me if you would like to participate. And lol no it is NOT the "why I like to kick guys in the nuts thread" | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 10:15:35 PM | | Who cares why some single men don't like you single moms? Some single men will like you, some won't. Can someone explain why this thread hasn't died yet? I'm guessing some of you posters take other peoples' comments waaaaaaaaaaaay too seriously [yes, I get the irony of me posting]. Relax and have a great weekend! | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/30/2008 11:55:16 PM | I'm not...........Smuggler..............!!
bahahahaha!
okay ummmm, maybe not but he's kinda turnin' my crank tonite...................*batts singlemama eyelashes*...
<<<< ah, it's lonely in Singlemama'sVille tonite....
 ...where's the Johneboy, I need some chaotic stimulation.....?
OT: I've given up on thinking about it....no need, this thread is the Single Mothers Bible.... | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/31/2008 5:32:56 AM | I'm fully aware why some men won't date single mothers..it's the same reason I wouldn't date a man with the morals of the Marquis de Sade, who is under 6' tall, or with an IQ < 120 (I'll settle for 110 if he can make his pecs dance to 'I'm too sexy"), preference! But I was catching up on this thread and wondered why are some men so easy to use?
I've met plenty of men over the years who I could have fleeced, especially when I was younger and a bit feral. Reading these posts there certainly are enough men complaining about the women who used and abused them. So what makes some men so easy to use? While I understand the lure of voodoo punani, it can't be the only reason men get hooked on wanton women.
(I know it's off topic but really I'm curious ) | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/31/2008 6:15:48 AM |
While I understand the lure of voodoo punani,
Good thing no one else in the house is awake right now, or I'd have to explain to my kids why I suddenly laughed quite loudly. (And then I had to go check to make sure they were still asleep. Thanks.) | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 5/31/2008 7:57:56 AM |
In Smuggler's defense, I don't think this was nasty at all.
Perhaps you are right. However, my first instinct was to assume that comment was directed squarely at single moms...since that was the whole topic of this thread...Perhaps I am just letting the opinions of some get to me too much.
btw, it was not Smuggler that I was speaking of in terms of keeping this thread going...
So what makes some men so easy to use? While I understand the lure of voodoo punani, it can't be the only reason men get hooked on wanton women.
Hmm, great point! But, alas, I have a feeling no one wants to take responsibility any more for THEIR actions in situations they find themselves in.. | |
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