|
|
|
|
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 5:25:41 AM | Holy double talk! Ask a question about why some men can be used so easily and get the round about answer of it's because women are evil.
I believe in liberal feminism, just because I'm pro woman doesn't mean I'm anti men. Feminism taught me to be responsible for myself, which isn't what most of you wounded men are stating single mothers aren't.
Now if take issue with me being a Vagina Warrior rant if you must but I won't debate theory in forums. I find most forums are empirical which result in many responses based on emotional issues as the result of poor life experience, fantasy life experience and/or lack of knowledge, so why bother.
On the topic of Johne:
I'm fairly confident this is his fantasy world, a place where he can feel perused and desirable so I take him with a grain of salt. Negativity is one of the best ways to stay terminally single.
Actually when someone makes me backspace mean words, I imagine them at a party with fun and interesting people, have a laugh and forget about it. | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:24:28 AM | Can you tell me where I have insulted single moms? I did not mean to insult anyone. If I id I am sorry but I do not understand how me posting my experiences dating single mom's and my reasons for not dating them can be offensive? My reasons are based on reality folks. Again this is a public forum. I have suggested single mom's "put themselves in the shoes" of single men who may have had bad past experiences dating single moms. Why can;t you single mom's do that?
I can understand why some single mom's may ask why men will not date them..but be willing to read the answers. | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:24:56 AM | | Well now, I'm not sure about everything you said. Johne, whether you like his opinion or not is entitled to it, and to voice it. Perhaps not AS MANY TIMES as he has. His experiences, if accurate, show a poor selection process. Something I think we all have suffered from in dating at times. As one woman put it she is a giver not a taker, sounds like Johne met all takers or worse. I don't care if your single mom/dad or liberal or conservative. I think it's more about finding who we want to be with, don't you? Bob | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:26:30 AM |
Can you tell me where I have insulted single moms?
have suggested single mom's "put themselves in the shoes" of single men who may have had bad past experiences dating single moms. Why can;t you single mom's do that?
And Johne, I asked you a serious question the other day in response to you saying that almost exact phrase... You listed a bunch of things things , which I already DO, because that is the person I AM.
What else do you suggest? Seriously.
I don't think you have an answer to it. It is not as simple as black and white as you would like to make it out to be.
| |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:37:54 AM | | AWW Johne, you had to do it. Johne look back through pages 30 to 60 and read some of your earlier rants. Poor taste at best, also you repeat the same thing, a forum is for discussion hopefully resolving some things not just to stay intractable about your position. Your experiences while disturbing, show a poor selection process that netted you users and takers. If it happened to you once, I would say OK, but you stated it happened 6 or 7 times. What is common in that is YOU. You selected those women over and over again. Think about it through 105 pages maybe 2 or 3 guys jumped on with somewhat similar experiences with only 1 woman. Now some men may not want to date single moms for other reasons and that's their choice. But don't denegrate the whole group over bad experiences you had at the hands of a few women, Bob | |
|
| |
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 10:13:43 AM | I think it's hilarious that he copped to liking a non-custodial single mother. 1: I always have to ask why any parent is non-custodial. and 2: get hitched (or cohabitate) and bang! the kid moves back. Whups.
Also, don't those pesky 'loco parentis' laws apply to ALL kids, not just those you live with full-time? g'luck, johne. Or is this just one of those "hey, i do have standing" fantasy statements like, "some of my best friends are gay?"
| |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 10:55:07 AM | desertdhino:
loco parentis in Canada only applies to children that you live with. Do you know how many of these threads get started by single mother's? Itr only takes a few bad experiences. So just how many more chances should I give single mother's? First you bash when a guy posts about one bad experience saying that they are not all like that...then you bash those who have had multiple bad experiences saying it must be his fault...do you not think there are some single mom's out their out to use people with the phrase "The best interest of my child" as their mantra? Not all are doing it but there are many.
With the laws we have in Canada do you not see that as a deterant to dating single moms?. | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 11:05:22 AM | | Johne, I don't think anyone here really wants you to give single mothers another chance. I think they just want you to stop sounding like a broken record, and stop constantly bashing them. :) | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 11:53:01 AM | | You know what Johne, I think I figured it out. I looked at your profile and other posts on other threads. Maybe I should have seen it before, but I get it now. The only two answers are: 1. You have NO LIFE, and your doing this to get attention or a rise out of these women due to the fact no other women pay you any mind. 2. You have a mental condition that will not allow reason, discussion or any other form of communication in. At least 75% of the people on this thread live in the USA, and while we sympathize with you folks up there it gets old hereing that same saw for 100 pages. start a campaign to change it or move to a country with a better set of laws. Not our issue or why most of these women are not dating single men. Your intolerance and narrow mindedness amaze me. Do you realize that at 36 your dating pool of ladies without children shrinks every year. Probably now or in 4 years or less 3 out of 4 or at best 2 out of 3 available women to date will be single mothers. That means that somewhere between 66 and 75 women out of 100 you meet will have a child. So by your logic(if that is what it really is) you'll have a shot at dating 30 women out of 100. Now if by chance only 2 out of 30 like you(and I doubt you will be that successful with your narrow mind) that would probably mean a lot of cold showers and Leno for you. Worse if it is as I said a ruse for attention, that makes you a very sad human being. Bob | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 11:57:30 AM |
loco parentis in Canada only applies to children that you live with. Do you know how many of these threads get started by single mother's? Itr only takes a few bad experiences. So just how many more chances should I give single mother's? First you bash when a guy posts about one bad experience saying that they are not all like that...then you bash those who have had multiple bad experiences saying it must be his fault...do you not think there are some single mom's out their out to use people with the phrase "The best interest of my child" as their mantra? Not all are doing it but there are many. If someone has multiple bad experiences you have to look at what is the common denominator. You have stated that all have been single mothers. Okay. BUT there is still the common denominator of YOU. What is it about you that attracts these women? What is it about these women that attracts YOU? Why are you drawn to this type of woman. The fact that she has kids is a non issue. It is something in both you and these women that is the issue. You would not be bashed for having multiple bad experiences if you didn't keep telling everyone that you've had them. If you are having them, then YES IT IS YOUR FAULT. You made the choice. No one held a gun to your head and said date them. | |
|
| |
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 4:58:59 PM | | Okay you will avoid dating single moms. That's great. It still will not prevent your bad experiences though. You are still attracted to the same TYPE of women. You have done nothing in regards to yourself evaluation. You will continue to make the same poor choices for yourself. It's inevitable. All you have succeeded in doing is saving a lot of children from bad experiences with any situation you might have had with their mothers. | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 5:16:31 PM | | Johne, if you want to learn something, reach out to people in kindness and understanding. Find out their needs, wants and desires. Meet women with or without children and find their inner beauty, romance them, do little things for them to show you care. Be the man you could be and open your mind. Sometimes though it is SSOOOO much better with a person who can truly appreciate it, such as a single mother. Single moms have to work every, not unlike yourself cook and clean, shop and commute. Then on top of that, they must attend the needs of their child, if the child is young there's daycare, stories bedtime. As they get older homework, clothes etc. In their teens again clothing, bruised feelings, rebellion, dating, hormones. All the while she must maintain a normal life to give that young life a chance to mature in a safe loving enviroment. Now this is a woman who needs to feel like a woman not only a mommy. She wants to get a chance, and it won't be 3 or 4 nights a week, to put on that little black dress and heels and have the attention of a man just on her. If you get a chance, like I have done, I'll meet her for lunch and grab a quick burger, then take her to get her nails done, my treat. You get 30 minutes of her talking to you and she is being pampered, she's smiling, your smiling, it's all good. Johne do you have any of these memories? Wouldn't you rather have these than the ones you keep whining about? Screw dating policies, your letting life pass you by, don't you get it? Tick tock, tick tock man, don't lament bad experiences go out and make good ones. Bob | |
|
| |
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 5:22:54 PM | | Of course it is, attitude and a willingness to accept life as it is. We all want it to be better, sometimes we can make it better sometimes not. BUT we can always make it better by enjoying what and who we've got. Bob | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 5:53:04 PM | | Johne, can you hear me. Gee I feel like "The Who". Johne think of it this way. There's an office with women and men working in it, you work there. Among the women of course one is single, no kids, and one is a single mom. Sometimes a group goes out for drinks, but not single mom, she can't change her life at the last minute. She has to plan ahead, make time, figure out her budget. Single girl gets all the guys attention, cause she can at the drop of a dime, change her plans, but every single guy knows this and covets her attention. But with a little planning, you could help arrange baby sitter and have single mom all to yourself. Remember single girl can have who she wants, she will pick the best of the bunch, so will single mom, but she knows her time constraints, her commitments. She will appreciate your time and thoughtfulness SSOOO much more than a woman who can do what she wants when she wants. I know that this is simplistic, I am just trying to get you to see the possibilities. Your only problem in all this is your selection process. The women I've discribed in the last two posts exist by the hundreds. You just need to look at what it is your doing wrong in picking users. Johne I'm telling you 9 out of 10 are not users, so you are meeting them in the wrong place or are giving off signals that you can be used. Neither single women or single moms want doormats, they want stand up good guys. Just try and figure it out man,Bob | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:06:08 PM | Bob:
I prefer a lady who can go out at the drop of a hat..I prefer not to deal with the drama tthat comes with dating a single mom.
Many single mom's are great people but with my lifestyle they are not for me. I will not be paying for someone to be pampered unless I am in a serious committed relationship with her.
Again I prefer my time and money go to raising my own children not someone else's children. | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:08:53 PM | Then quit posting with us to tell us how horrible we are, and put it on your profile that you don't want to date a girl with kids. Say what you mean and mean what you say, huh? And most of all quit trying to email all of us and "make friends". I have no desire to be friends with someone who thinks my entire life and the 100% effort I put into it is something to speak of in the dismissive way you do. Buh Bye!  | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:26:56 PM | | Johne, Simm makes a good point. If you are sooo dead set against single moms, that this is a dealbreaker, hard set rule(your words not mine). Then you should do a number of things: 1. PUT IT ON YOUR PROFILE, along with your allegded guidelines. Now we both know your not going to do that, because you'd reduce your contacts by 70%. But if your a man of your word you'll do it. 2. You have made your point here, if you have nothing new or constructive to say. Don't you think it's time to move on? Or is it the attention you crave as I said earlier? Now if you are trying to contact these ladies as some have said, what's that about? If you don't like them, won't date them, think they're all users, why would you want to be friends with them? Johne your a troubled soul, who must not have good people skills. People will not be your friend if you insult them. I also don't get the idea of you won't pamper them. If you date Johne unless I miss my guess, you should pick them up, open doors, hold chairs pay for dinner and movie or whatever you do. So you'd rather not see her for 10 days, then to buy her a manicure instead of a movie if she doesn't have the time to see you otherwise?(same price) When you love, or even like someone you want to see them every moment you can. In fact if your doing it right it hurts, actually hurts when you don't see them. Johne you need help. Bob | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:36:19 PM | See this is what some of you are missing:
Just because I choose not to date a single mom with custody does not mean I do not have friends who are single mothers. It is possible to be friends with someone without planning a life together. It is possible to be a friend to a mother and a child without being a husband/father figure. I have a few friends who are single mom's who will not date single fathers. They say they also fear having to pay child suport for a step child and they do not want to raise the child of another woman. One even says that another woman's child just brings drama and does not want time money or attention taken away from her own children. So it works both ways.
I do hold open doors, hold chairs and pay for dinners for ladies I date.
Why would I want to put myself in a situation I do not want to be in? | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:49:15 PM | Cntrygrl101,
Have you ever heard the conversation of a men discussing a man dating a single mother who has a preteen or teen daughter. Phrases such as "It's in the milk" and "steroids in the meat" constantly comes up. Trust me, men can be real howlers(serious dogs). women (regardless are age) are rated constantly-And if they have daughters, their daughters are compared to them!! Some men simply don't want the temptation of a younger girl running around that looks similar and perhaps better looking than their mom-the honest cold hard truth. Best if the girl lives with her dad are grandmother unless the guy is a die-hard Christian and attends a solid church(which simply means he has less probability of being a freak). | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:55:02 PM | | I agree, why would you want to put yourself in a situation you don't wish to be in? So explain why your in this one now? This situation is a forum of mostly women asking about dating men, they ALL have children, you WON'T DATE THEM, why are you still here after 105 pages. You have made your position clear, they hear you, they DON'T WANT TO DATE YOU. They now wish to discuss, why other men won't date them, not just you. If you have insights other than what you have already expressed let's hear them, if not move on. Do you feel you have the right to infringe on their discussions just to say the same thing over and over and over ad infinitim? Does it make sense to you that they just want some new viewpoints. Just look at the chaos your causing not to mention emotional angst in women who've done nothing to you. Johne your actions are very, very selfish. People are people, these women are just as entitled as you to have their discussion without a totally skewed point of view foisted on them over and over again. How about starting your own thread. Johne's limited view of single moms. You could call it "I'll die before dating a single mom" or "single moms vampires in disguise" or "twenty things johne hates about single moms" or "I'll eat worms before I'll date a single mom" or ........you get the idea. Bob | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:38:34 PM | He did start several threads all relating to the same thing. The last one was called something like "How to avoid being used by a single mother". They were all deleted for obvious reasons. A dating site is not a place to spew hatred against anyone.
I suspect that it is the attention he craves plus a suspicion that he may be obsessed with single moms. It's certainly not for any real dialog. | |
|
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:12:40 PM |
Can you tell me where I have insulted single moms?
OK, I took the bait. Aside from your numerous posts where you have implied things about single mothers by posting your individual experiences, and aside from your general condescending attitude towards them, here are some quotes from some of your posts in this thread (and I didn't even go back through the whole thread.)
(Note: although I started by only selecting insulting quotes, I instead chose some that I found to be interesting and/or ironic for other reasons.)
single mom's nade their choice to have a child with Mr Wrong (widows are exempt from this) why should another man step in to rescue you?
This is insulting because many (if not most) single mothers do not want or need to have a "man step in to rescue" them. They are after companionship, love, and all of the other things that other people seek as well. To insinuate that they need to be rescued is quite rude.
You are exempt if you are a widow because their Mr Right died. Picking Mr Wrong and having a child with him does not entitle you to a date. Even if you want one.
This is insulting because you are holding past "mistakes" (about the choice of the father) against them, however, you do not hold non-parents similarly responsible for their past "mistakes". By your standards, shouldn't you only date virgins who have never been in relationships?
This statement is also very ironic considering your dating track record as you have posted it. You have selected many Ms. Wrongs. Should your future potental dates turn you away for this?
If you picked a man who wold not stick around when the child was born or you picked a loser who was a drug addict or alcoholic what does that say about you?
If you choose to leave because you just did not love him anymore why do I think you will do anything to make a romance work with me.
If you have chidren with more than one man..why could you not make the relationships work or pick a better person to have a child with?
Again, you are holding the past against single mothers when you don't hold others to the same standards.
A better idea why do single mom's mpt choose better men to have children with?
A) Yet again, insulting their decisions and holding them to higher standards than you hold others.
B) Pot. Kettle. You know the story.
Wht can't single mom's accept that they are not on the A1 dating list and just acept whatever comes there way? Or get the laws changed and they will have better choices. Single moms seem not to want the laws changed but expect a handsome rich man to date her and marry her..the smart rich and handsome men are choosing not to get involved with single moms..and with good reason.
Here, you are stating that being a parent automatically makes a person less desirable (this is insulting), and then you continue to imply (if not flat out state) that single mothers are golddiggers.
There is a reason for certain stereotpes!!!
A) Here you are justifying stereotyping. Seriously? You don't view this as insulting?
B) Which stereotypes do you mean? The ones where men who chose not to be involved with single mothers are considered "not real men" or immature, or something like that? The stereotypes where men who are more focused on money than people are considered shallow? The ones where men don't volunteer their money are considered cheap? Or only the ones that are convenient for you?
I have also learned that when you date single mom you are expected to instantly bond with the kids who get brought along on date #1 or 2 without being told they are coming along. That is a turn off.
Yet another instance of being insulting by judging a whole group based on the actions of a few.
Rome fell because of immorality and we as a society need to have better morality so there are few single moms.
How is it not insulting to consider single moms to be the products of immorality and imply that they are causing the downfall of society.
When I see a single mom I see someone that unless they are widowed..could not make the relationship work with the child's father...why would I think she would make the relationship work with me?
I think I've covered why this is both insulting and ironic.
Single moms or anyone else that need money should not be dating...have your life in order before you start dating.
Here, you are stating that single mothers automatically need money and need to get their lives in order.
Some people should accept that they are not the first choice for many to date.
Other people should accept that they are naturally drawn to golddiggers. ;)
If you could not make it work with the father of your child or you choose the wrong guy....why should that become my problem?
I'm reminded of the numerous posts I passed by where you were accused of posting the same thing over and over again.
if single moms and their situation are s desriable why are you still single
I find this insulting towards all single people. However, since you were asking where you insulted single mothers, I felt that calling them undesirable counted.
And why look for a good one? It is like trying to find a needle in a haystack.
A good single mother is a needle in a haystack? Yet, you've never intended to insult single mothers?
Single moms must realize not everyone wants to step into a ready made family. It is all risk and little if any reward.
Little reward? Hopefully, even you can spot the insult here.
I find women with children from another man are less loving towards their boyfriend/husband then women without children.
This one's even more obvious.
I have gone out on at least one date with 10 maybe 12 women who do not have children since I turned 22. (I was engaged to one and another I was with for 3 years)
I have been asked for a loan once of $10 on date#1 and when I asked her to sign a promisery note she started to cry saying I did not trust her....I would not give her the money and she walked out.
I have had a few of those women (maybe 6 or 7) insist a man should pay for all dates and if they do not they will not see them again.
Now, I ask again, how you can criticize single mothers on their past dating histories. Is it only because you didn't have children with these women? Does that somehow improve your decisions?
If your child is your number 1 priority why do you need to date?
If breathing is your number 1 priority, why do you need to eat? Actually, if money is your number 1 priority, why do you need to date? ;)
Just because you are a single mom does not mean you are entitled to a relationship...you have to show that you are different from the others for someone to want to date you.
Here, you imply that single mothers all feel a sense of entitlement and that they need to prove themselves above others.
Sterotypes exist for a reason..it is because they are true in some cases. Maybe not all but some.
Again, I see some repitition in your posts. (And I actually excluded most of it.)
I prefer not to deal with the drama tthat comes with dating a single mom.
By stating that single mothers come with drama you have (inadvertantly?) insulted single mothers yet again.
Furthermore, the reason I argue so strongly in favor of the single mothers, is that I can just as easily see these attitudes turned towards single fathers as well. Thus, by insulting single mothers, you are insulting many single fathers at the same time.
Here's an interesting thought. Since you seem to feel that after several bad experiences with single mothers that you should write them off, and since you have posted about several bad experiences with this site, why not leave it? Or, why not apply your criticisms to women in general (since all bad experiences with single mothers were also with women), and just swear off dating women? If not, then perhaps you can finally see the flaw in your reasoning. (Although I won't hold my breath.) And, no, I'm not asking you to start dating single mothers, just to stop with your repetitive and insulting posts. | |
|
|
| Page 105 of 140
|
100, 101, 102, 103, 104, 105, 106, 107, 108, 109, 110, 111, 112, 113, 114, 115, 116, 117, 118, 119, 120, 121, 122, 123, 124, 125, 126, 127, 128, 129, 130, 131, 132, 133, 134, 135, 136, 137, 138, 139, 140 |
|
Home
login 
