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| I am a man, and only look for single mothers
Posted: 6/1/2005 11:19:48 AM | I have a 3 year old daughter and I only look for women who are in the same boat as me.. I would rather have someone that is understanding about the world of parenting to be with.
There are alot or guys out there with the same attitude as I so you cant give up.. just look past the jerks and you will find what you are looking for..
Andy | |
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| I am a man, and only look for single mothers
Posted: 6/1/2005 11:25:02 AM | There are alot or guys out there with the same attitude as I so you cant give up.. just look past the jerks and you will find what you are looking for..
very good point there are a few guys out there that wont date a woman with a child(ren) but i belive there are even more that will date a single mother my daughter is almost 4 and i have never had a problem getting a boyfriend and all men i date know about my daughter the first day that i meet them | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2005 12:34:00 PM | | Well I don't know if anyone has ever relized this but it actually works bothways. Since my seperation I have dated two women that have tucked tail and ran as soon as they found out that I have 2 boys. There are my life and I can't even imagine life wothout them. It is a package deal with the three of us. I guess I just never relized that many women are like some men and do run at the mention of children. I always thaught that women handled children better than we men do, but I'm learning the hard way that it happens both ways. Mabe I'm more disappointed than I should be but it 's like a slap in the face or some kind of punishment that I have children and that I have them with me half the times, (one week on and one week off). | |
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| I am a man, and only look for single mothers
Posted: 6/1/2005 8:11:26 PM | Jenelle, that is undoubtedly true. Personally, while I don't need to have another child of my own... I wouldn't rule it out if my lady really wanted one...
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2005 11:29:48 PM | | Well country girl, this is yet another one of those agree to disagree threads. You may have had badluck with the losers you found, I have had horrible luck with the women who soon as they learn single father with 2 girls,BAM they be gone.This story is the same on both sides of the fence. You gotta be sure you are not looking for a father for your kids, but a relationship for YOU. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/1/2005 11:37:58 PM | A lot of young single men would probably prefer not to be in a relationship with a single mother, because if they do happen to fall in love, they now have a lot more responsibility then they would normally and at a young age, that's not most young men's dream.
Also, a lot of men seem to have a fascination of being a woman's first, so since a single mother obviously isn't the ideal in that regard, they may go after someone else that fits their standards better.
Honestly, I fail to see the difference between this and women refusing to date men that aren't tall enough for them, or those that have lost their hair. To me, people that do either of this, have got no reason to b*tch about not being with someone/having crappy relationships. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 12:25:01 AM | I dont have any plans of "biting" guys just because they like single girls more.
Its there rights!
What i just want to stressed out is We,single mothers,are not at all a bad catch,Theres just a lot of good things being with us!
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 7:17:47 AM | | The people in your life reflect your state of mind. Have you considered deep down that maybe you have a fear of how the status quo will change when someone else comes to be with you and your child? Perhaps your fear of things not working out for the best is what's holding Mr.Right from being able to find you now. God gives unto equals. Seek the best inside yourself and he will find you when you are ready for him. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 8:21:12 AM | I looked over the profile of swtlildevlish. I realized that she resides in Thailand.
I know that the stigma/fear/mis-unerstanding/social injustice against single mothers are much stronger in Sinic/confucian culture. This is doubly true given that Thailand is not a developed economy. To make things worse, there is an over-supply of young grils in Thailand. (Anyone who has been there can back this up.) I can only imagine how tough things can be for a single mom.
So yes, I feel your pain. I wish you best of luck. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 10:37:51 AM | | I have dated single mothers and eventually married one who was raising three. The only problem I ever had with it was getting attached to the child as the relationship with the mom eventually soured. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 10:55:45 AM | Something, I also married a woman who had a 3 yr old and 6 yr old. The hardest part about getting divorced was the way in which she taught her oldest (a daughter) to treat me (and maybe men in general later in life, also) by her example. Being her 3rd ex-, I have to wonder, sadly, how her daughter will turn out. I did the best I could, and I learned a lot about relationships and what is and isn't acceptable to me. 8 years of my life... was not a waste at all, I refuse to think of it like that. However, I learned many hard lessons in the last 2-3 years we were together. Thankfully, her 2nd ex-hubby got custody of his son, and the four of us (my son, me, her 2nd ex-, and his son) are all very good friends now, and we do a fair amount together, even though they live in another town.
I'd not trade the experience for anything, as I got my son from the deal, regardless of the cost. You live and (hopefully) learn. Unlike her 2nd ex- tho, I am not soured on the possibilities of a good relationship... too optimistic for that. Just a bit more wary to begin with, and a lot more experienced. Whether a woman has kids or not isn't a consideration for me, in the sense that I can accept it either way, and I have a better idea of what I want out of a relationship, and am not willing to just settle again, out of loneliness. With my son, I am not at all lonely, even though I'd love to find a special woman to spend time with, get to know intimately (not meaning physically, more in a best friend sense, knowing her inside and out), and see where things go from there. Being alone and being lonely are very different things, even though linguistcally they share the same root word. :)
Leif | |
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dino12
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Joined: 5/31/2005
Msg: 142 | |
| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 11:23:34 AM | I prefer to date single moms, but then agian I am a single dad.
single moms have benefits that most men don't even consider. They are most loving, thrifty (by necessity usually), and enjoy even the smallest of efforts that often get overlooked by non-child singles. They can multitask well, listen more than talk, pay attention, respect their partner, love their kid(s) and yours too if you give a little room. They are problem solvers....if htey can't solve it, it can't be solved.
The single mom has the added benefit of the child as well. I said benefit! The kids are great....you got a fishing buddy.....put a cane pole in a childs hand and bait the hook in a good pond and you are the master of fun! Can we say ICE CREAM anyone? Goofing off....now who knows better how to goof off than a kid....I think we adults could take lessons sometimes, and ease up on being some damn serious. Watching a kid discover something new is an awesome sight to behold, and helping them make stuff can be fun and educational for you and the child.
Single moms do come with baggage, but I come with baggage of my own.....so it is an even swap. I can tote a pretty good load....I am The Burro of Excess Baggage
there is no settling down with a single mom.....they are already settled down for the most part. You just have to get things in sync with one another.
I am the child of a single mom. I prefer to date single moms. Easier to understand single moms....
Doc | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 2:11:38 PM | Wow! u amazed me by making a background check on me!what was that all about?
But i suggest you better make a clear research first before concluding on something.
First,Thailand is a Buddhist Country. In here Live and Let live!
We are in a modern world!
new age --the stigma about single mothers here is not at all as stressed as what you are trying to point out!
though, i wont deny that asian guys prefers single girls because of the culture.This doesnt only apply toThailand.
What is the connection of the economy about this stigma? trying to be brainy?
and Take note: I NEVER had any problem about this thing.
I choose the people that i am associating with .So i never encounter such narrow-minded guys!
Lesson: Dont try to look brainy especially if you dont have one! | |
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herk
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Joined: 12/28/2004
Msg: 145 | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 7:37:27 PM | | I also look for single moms, because women without kids just don't get it. Then again, many single moms don't get it either. I seriously dated a single mom of one child, who told me when she broke it off with me that it was because she wanted to have more kids of her own (I'm "fixed"), and also that she couldn't handle my son who has ADHD (even though she is a teacher LOL). Another single mom I dated, she wanted to date several different guys at once and just call me when she wanted some casual sex (nice role model for her own daughter, eh?), and once I figured her out I ended that one. Kudos to all the single moms who genuinely want to treat a guy right and are not selfish, guess I just haven't run into any personally. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 8:18:51 PM | | Kudos to you Flawingman... I'd not want anything serious with either of those women, the teacher who couldn't deal with my son, nor the casual sex one either. Not what I want my son to have for a role model... . The good ones are definately out here, just gotta find the right one at the right time... ;) | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 8:27:06 PM | | I have a son 4 1/2, he's the love of my life. I would do anything for him if ever the need was there. You will find that parents will do this. However, they are very protective of their children than taking a second chance at finding that special person. Not all men or women are animals, some are very good people if given a chance. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 8:40:31 PM | | Here is my thought on things. I have been a single mother for almost 12 years. And having said that I have also had my share of heartbreaks. For the most part I think that when guys or girls for that matter date a single parent their first thought turns to "oh that single parent is just looking for a 'mom' or 'dad' for their kid(s)" It is up to us as single parents to lay that on the line upfront. When approached by a man I always tell them that I have a daughter but am not looking for a co-parent as her father, while a terrible partner, is a fantastic father. That was part of the problem when I met and married my soon to be ex husband. He had no clue what he was doing and he tried to "father" my daughter. But up until we were married he had been her friend. Then when are son was born he had no clue and left everything up to me. Now here I am in the same boat as before. Only now I have two kids and have to explain a 10 year age difference. So, my long-drawn out point is, don't give up. There are men out there who do want to be with single moms and always remember that kids need to come first. | |
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| Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 6/2/2005 9:02:27 PM | How come I get a sense that someone is a little bitter here? 
Quote: "First,Thailand is a Buddhist Country." Don't tell me Thai culture is not heavily influenced by Sinc/Confucian culture, as the vast majority of elite in Thai society are ethinic Chinese.
Quote: "i wont deny that asian guys prefers single girls because of the culture.This doesnt only apply toThailand." So we are not disagreeing. The stigma is arguably worse in Asia.
Quote: "What is the connection of the economy about this stigma? "
The divorce rate is much higher in developed countries such as those in western Europe. So being a single mom does not carry as much stigma.
Quote: "Dont try to look brainy especially if you dont have one"
Did I mention someone sounds bitter? Whenever someone resorts to personal attack, you know that person has run out of good arguments. | |
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