| |
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/4/2008 10:19:59 PM | Well, if you bailed on him, that is totally disrespectful and no one should do that, it is a cowardly way to handle things. If someone has a problem with someone, they should tell them in a nice and respectful way and just discuss it, but it is rude and mean to just take off.
From what I read, he doesn't sound like he was THAT bad as it seems you are making it. I mean I don't know the whole story and what happened, and I don't know his side of the story, so I can't say too much on that, but we need to understand, that no date is going to be perfect, no date is going to have the other person do exactly what you would like them to do, in what way you want them to do it and when ect. There are some things that you just can't control and it's best to get over it and try to make the best out of things if you're serious about dating and getting into a relationship. | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/5/2008 6:41:06 AM | Do not give up .. nice people are out there .. it is an experience to learn form. Next time make your first time meeting very brief, coffee or tea in a non smoking and quite ambiance this way you can make your mind to go for seconds or say thanks but no thanks. Do not sell yourself cheap.
Good luck!
 | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/5/2008 10:18:10 AM | OP - Just out of curiosity, what exactly was it about this guy that made you want to meet him for a date in the first place?
It's just that I have a very hard time believing people can be quite THAT different in person. | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/5/2008 10:49:42 AM | | I know whatcha mean. But im from the oponosit side, been called a date from hell more tahn once. I think of myself as a nice guy, but im not sofisticated or edjicated. i admit i have a drinkin problem, but im upfront about that, and im a happy drunk. i dont care much for tobaco smoke eether. i do like to chew tho. i just kinda think you didnt do yur homework as agood as u could of, otherwise u wouldnt have had all them nasty surprizes. kloo number1 that dude was jerk was that he's meetin a stranger on new years, no plans with any frends, prolly cuz he duznt have any frends. which kinda gets me wunderin about u, are u new in town? or dont u have any frends eether? Even sumbuddy like me has frends and i admit freely im not a great catch. | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/5/2008 11:09:57 AM |
OP - Just out of curiosity, what exactly was it about this guy that made you want to meet him for a date in the first place?
It's just that I have a very hard time believing people can be quite THAT different in person.
(from the OP)I didn't ask if he smoked and I didn't look and that was my mistake. The New Years thing was a last minute plan
It wasn't so much a bad date as it was a bad decision! It seems as though there was a lot of over looking and jumping in blind.. And yes, not looking over someones profile before meeting is jumping in blind! Hell I do before we chat!
So you get what you get!
~Belly~ | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/5/2008 11:16:54 AM | Miss Pamela, methinks hellish date broke one of the cardinal rules of a first meeting.
Cell phone was still on. Voice mail has a function.
He opened the door for an opportunity to bail. I probably would have. Others have stated the 20 minute rule or women's intuition. Go with your gut.
Good luck tonight. In the words of Howard Jones, things can only get better! | |
|
OLT4U
|
Joined: 12/21/2007
Msg: 33 | |
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/7/2008 8:44:56 PM | | He sounds like a typical "fixer upper" that so many woman seem enthralled with. I'll bet a number of online readers here are saying to themselves, "I can fix him". You could have put him up on ebay and sold him off to the never learning. | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/8/2008 6:35:43 AM | OP - Just out of curiosity, what exactly was it about this guy that made you want to meet him for a date in the first place?
It's just that I have a very hard time believing people can be quite THAT different in person.
Are you kidding me? This happens all the time. The guy was very pleasant on the phone and online. How was I supposed to know he was an inconsiderate moron that didn't have manners based on phone conversations? This is called the world of online dating and if you read many of the posts on here, you will find that many people have had the same type of experiences that I had. What is so hard to believe about that? | |
|
| |
| |
| |
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/10/2008 7:57:35 AM |
Miss Pamela, methinks hellish date broke one of the cardinal rules of a first meeting.
Cell phone was still on. Voice mail has a function.
This is one of my biggest pet peeves -- not just on dates, but in general. Cell phones are a great thing. They can save your life if you've just been in a car accident, or keep you from walking miles in the rain when you're stranded with a flat tire, or give you movie showtimes when you decide to go out on a whim, or help you coordinate an impromptu meeting with a friend. My cell phone is almost always on for emergencies, but 90% of the time, I keep it on vibrate. If I'm out with someone -- I don't care if it's a long-time friend or someone I just met -- and the phone rings, the person who took the time out of their day to spend it with me in person gets priority. If the caller leaves a voicemail, I'll check it at my earliest convenience (i.e., if the person I'm with excuses himself to go to the restroom), and if it's urgent, I'll apologize and excuse myself to return the call. I was on a date once with a guy I otherwise found very attractive and engaging, and in the middle of the date, he took a phone call and was on it for a good five minutes (if that's not bad enough, his ringtone was "Too Late to Apologize" by Timbaland; he lost 10 points right there).
And am I the only one who thinks that talking on a cell phone while you're at the checkout at a store is completely and utterly inexcusable? I've actually seen it both ways -- I've seen rude customers do it to cashiers, and rude cashiers do it to customers. What's worse, the offendee seems completely oblivious to this conduct. I just wish the sale of a cell phone required the purchaser to pass an etiquette course first...  | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/10/2008 8:08:06 AM | why did you stay ? thats just nuts
Well because I was trying to be polite and I already knew that it wasn't going anywhere, plus I didn't want him to catch me getting in my car in the parking lot as he was going out to get his cigarettes. I think he got the message not long after he got back, so the date lasted for maybe an hour if that. Just another lesson I learned and don't plan on doing in the future. | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/10/2008 8:08:53 AM | u KNEW he smoked u went n e way so u CANT complain bout that
and ............u stayed too long with him. If it were myself? The moment a 'gentleman' left his DATE at the bar standing ALONE would be my 'q' to MINGLE....whateva girl i dont know how many ways there r to say this
PEOPLE ONLY DO TO US WHAT WE LET THEM DO.....hellloooooooo????????
and u know that..
kathi
ps the next date WILL be better and u learn more and more from every one just dont get disgusted and think of it this way these dates? r practise for the NIGHT we meet HIM and wow it'll be gr8! ( but we gottttta sift first ..its just part of it)
God bless
kathi  | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/10/2008 8:10:49 AM | he was RUDE no he wasnt a SERIAL killer ...BUT he was rude to a lady and its not called "bailing" its leaving the scene with at LEAST a shred of pride left..yikes u gotta be kiddin me he WAS 'that bad' y dont YOU go out with him and let him spew smoke in ur face all nite and talk filth
how would YOU like it? kathi | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/10/2008 8:12:15 AM | | No I DIDN'T KNOW he smoked if you read my earlier posts you will see that, and like I have stated several times, yes I know this was a mistake and I learned my lesson, so please no more lectures okay? | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/11/2008 2:38:28 PM | I understand Pamela. She was alone on New Years eve and all the sudden some opportunity to have some amusement came along with this guy from POF. She was really hoping everything was going at least okay, a nice conversation and maybe some more. In her mind weren't questions or doubts, just the desire of get out the house and have some fun.
Many people commit this same mistake, especially when they are alone and bored. Pamela thought this guy was at least okay, he sounded nice and safe on the phone and maybe fun too, so there she goes to meet him. And it is difficult to establish crude truths with a person you just met, especially if you are nice and good person like Pamela. She could not act with rudeness and leave. She has style and grace. She suffered the whole hour the company of this inconsiderate jerk. Better luck the next time Pamela, you look great and deserve better! BTW, how was your other coming date ? | |
|
| |
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/11/2008 2:57:43 PM | Thanks so much boricua pap! I appreciate you took the time to see it from my perspective, rather than bashing me for not 'knowing this guy smoked, ect, ect' I really was leaving my options open that day, and what's funny is I had a few other offers to go out after I had commted to this one, but you know hindsight is 20/20 so I went out taking a chance that he would be a nice and cool guy.
| |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/11/2008 3:06:01 PM | Pamela.. I can sypathize with you. I used to stay.. now I don't. If I am not feeling the attraction, POOF I end it right there, and I wish the guy would too if he is not attracted to me as well.
~Tina~ | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/15/2008 9:28:21 PM | Pam:
Have you ever noticed how people don't even read the ENTIRE post before they comment?
I would recommend to those people to learn English and possibly take a typing class.
(you know who you are)
Oh and better luck next time Pam!
Clayton | |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/17/2008 2:37:21 PM | I'm really sorry to hear about your experience Pamela & I do agree that sometimes the people you talk to on the phone turn out to be quiet different in person. Talking on the phone is good don't get me wrong, but you do have to ask allot of questions to try & find out what the other person is all about & when you meet, you get to see if they were telling you the truth (plus you see mannerisms, body language, etc.). I've gone through that myself, but that's part of dating (the ugly part of it, LOL)!
I can make you feel better about your New Year's Eve, mine went like this..........I went out with someone that I had seen a few times. It started out fine, we went to the Pier & walked on the beach. All was going well until he started drinking, then it hit the fan. He was very loud, aggrogant, started preaching to me & on & on (I'll spare you all the details). People would turn & look at him like he was crazy & I was so embarrassed that I walked away from him a few times. When he would catch up & asked what was wrong why was I walking away from him & not talking, I told him he was acting like a jerk & making an A$$ out of himself & that I wasn't going to deal with it. I didn't put up with people that are bad drunks & can't respect me for the lady I am & that is something I had mentioned to him when we first started talking. He made the decision to get drunk & be a jerk & I made the decision to not see him again!!
No one has to put up with someone that doesn't respect you! Just like this guy you went out with, he should have walked away if he wanted to smoke & turned off his phone. Common sense that's all. It is live & learn out the in the dating world & online dating. You have to take the good with the bad. I guess he didn't care if he made a good impression or not. He has no clue & no respect!
Hang in there. Do ask the question that are important for you to know answers to & don't be shy about asking. If they can't answer them, then they might have something to hide & that's a red flag!
Good luck my friend on future dates!
| |
|
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/17/2008 2:56:01 PM | | This just proves my point even more - you have to be very selective and choose your dates with great caution. | |
|
oshan
|
Joined: 1/5/2008
Msg: 50 | |
| New Years Eve date from hell!
Posted: 1/17/2008 3:00:07 PM | smiling writes: "1. he wanted sex. many women "play the game" also, in 50% of cases or so, he could be successful with his approach actually."
I really hate it when people make these sweeping statements. It really indicates the attitudes and lack of accurate information and knowledge. BTW, where is the study, statistics and/or research to support such a ludicrous statement??? | |
|
Home
login 
