| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 7:59:50 AM | | Interestingly - this topic is bring in the exreemists - I do not know in pointof fact if amy men in actual fact divorce women on account of gluttony - It is conceivable if your former glamour girl of a couple of years down the line is ever in her dressing gown all day - and you try your dardest to be romantic, and you gaze at her and request that she stop eating for just long enough to give a straight forward response - and it is then you are struck down by the triple chin - the enormous spread of the cordroy thousers, the weezingm, the breathlessness - and you pause to reflect - Where has romance gone?" | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:00:32 AM | | Interestingly - this topic is bring in the exreemists - I do not know in pointof fact if amy men in actual fact divorce women on account of gluttony - It is conceivable if your former glamour girl of a couple of years down the line is ever in her dressing gown all day - and you try your dardest to be romantic, and you gaze at her and request that she stop eating for just long enough to give a straight forward response - and it is then you are struck down by the triple chin - the enormous spread of the cordroy thousers, the weezingm, the breathlessness - and you pause to reflect - Where has romance gone?" | |
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nogo3
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Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 53 | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:07:04 AM |
Is it my imagination or are those who are overweight, resentful that the subject is being scrutinised.
Not at all!
I sit here and laugh wondering why people who do that "scrutinizing" would think their opinion is so d a m n important. It's kinda mind boggling actually.
They pick out what they consider flaws in one person, but ignore their own which are just as visiable to the eye as overweight people are! Their hypocricy is blinding!
Personally, even when I didn't have the medical problems I have and was thinner, I never cared if they were short, tall, fat, thin, bald or hairy. You could have the most drop dead gorgeous body and be the ugliest person on the inside. If looks were what made people lovable, if looks were what was important in a relationship...the truly "beautiful" people in the world, such as Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidmann for example...would still be happily married. So much for looks!! lol | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:10:48 AM |
If the Girl you marriedstarted straight after marriage to put on the pounds, which then became stones, so that you felt that not only was it bad for health resons, but a certain part of your attraction towards her was made up in the appreciation of her sexy hour glass figure, do you think that this is a legitimate complaint, of should you feel that you married her for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health?
Is it legitimate to have a preference for slim women, and to avoid a relationship with someone who is frankly fat? Someone who immediately "Let's themselves go" once the man was caught, is she risking her new found husband eyes straying to the slim specimens, who may well catch his eye in the sorkplace?
It would depend on the reasons for the weight gain.
If it was excessive (100+lbs) then both people should sit down and discuss it like adults.
If there are no medical issues then there should be room for some type of compromise.
My personal opinion is that if there no accompanying drop in hygiene (Yuck) then a moderate weight gain would be an issue for me.
Regardless of a weight gain,that's still the person you married.
If it was real in the beginning,the weight shouldn't matter | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:12:03 AM | | I hate the 'True love is blind' crap! I personally almost never see two people that are very opposite in looks. Both are either thin or fat, or whatever. Physical attraction is part of the whole mix. Sticking with the OP's topic, if she got so overweight he no longer found himself attracted to her AND they discussed it...if it was me, I'd leave. I can not be in a relationship that I do not find my girl desireable. Is there anyone out there that currently is in a relationship that cannot think of having sex with their partner? If looks don't matter, way are there 100's of threads about 'fat' or 'average' person that can't get a date? With that said...if you find that person attractive, no matter what they look like...go for it! | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:12:47 AM | If my husband started to change from a muscled hunk into an obese guy leaving the gym to stuff his face with cake and cream all the time, will be calling for me to cheat on him and will there be a problem. But why did I marry him for first place? For his muscles?
My guess is she can feel you "love" her for one reason only and she is taking out her revenge on you through her body. But I am not a shrink and I am not a guy who does not listen to his wife's problems seeing them as "his misery" and reason to wander outside the marriage.
Presuming that she loves food and was waiting to get married to spoil her body is sheer lunacy. She is overeating for a deep reason and you need to surround her with some true and genuines love for you to help her out of this. This is if you had any in a first place.
Her answer "this ring is not around my neck, you don't own me" is aximatic... I don't know why you have a problem with her statement. Did you feel you should own her? How will it be if you packed on some inches around your waist? Will you appreciate it if she hopped in bed with someone fitter?
I am not blaming you for liking slim women (I am a big girl myself and some men like us and some don't...variety is the spice of life )... but somehow feeling that you MARRIED a woman because of her body shape is very immature and I think the poor woman knows it. | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:14:30 AM | | The first line of defense of the guilty obese, is to desparately look to take our eyes away from the subject in hand - the topis is about the overweight - we have someone talking about peoples other exemplary good points, or relating to Tom Cruise etc, how about slim rapists and slim murderers - NO it will not do - we shall not divert - and whatever way you look at it - a monstrouslly overweight woman could lose her man, and yet I ask you does she deserve to? | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:15:16 AM |
Regardless of a weight gain,that's still the person you married.
If it was real in the beginning,the weight shouldn't matter
Therein lies the problem....did you marry for the right reasons.
Good call, Cocytus! | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:18:24 AM |
I hate the 'True love is blind' crap! I personally almost never see two people that are very opposite in looks. Both are either thin or fat, or whatever.
Spec Savers have started their 60% sale. Take the opportunity. | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:20:27 AM | Strawbs08 i can't be sure who you are talking to as you don't specify ,but seeing as i have prefer not to say on my profile i will assume for a second you are talking to me.If you had read my profile you would see i had addressed that.I have up 8 pictures and 3 of them are less then 3 weeks old so why would i pick out a body type.People can look at my pictures and decide for themselves.
What reason would i have to be shallow and conceited about.I am fat, ugly and full of acne.There would be no reason for me to be shallow and conceited.Even when i was skinny i was ugly and full of acne so still no reason to be shallow and conceited. | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:24:15 AM | | Yes, very much so,,,But I like a man with love handles but not really fat...Would I date a really fat man the answer is NO. If you want a great lover then look at some one with no control and is fat as they have no control in the bed room either. {Being fat carries over into one's""""" traits, """"manners, """"job performances and"""" Life performances."""""" | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:34:09 AM | | Well, it shouldn't. I mean, most of us gain weight as we age,...& it WOULDN'T be a good idea to use the health-thing at all, because...chances are they would see right through it. It sounds like you just need to accept them & love them for who they are...& not because they're a size 6. | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:37:09 AM | I wouldnt leave someone cause they are a bit overweight.
If I met the guy that weight 165 like the one I have now and he turned to be 250, before he even reached that point, I would let him know that its unhealthy and I would start a plan before it gets to that point. Nobody gets fat from day to night remember.
With me what you get is what you see, I havent gained or lost any significant weight in the past 4 years, so letting go its not really something that will happen, but even if I do, I know I EVER hit 200, I will start to work out a lot to get the weight off to still be healthy.
Being 100 pounds is not healthy... having the hourglass figure depending on the person might not be healthy as well, if you want someone skinny forever, you should try to look for someone that is naturally thin, because Ive seen a lot of very attractive ladies that are the first ones to let go once they get married. | |
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naeco
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Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 65 | |
| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:39:53 AM |
{Being fat carries over into one's""""" traits, """"manners, """"job performances and"""" Life performances.""""""
Fat people are just lazy and don't get anywhere. But I'm sure glad nobody told that to Jim Belushi, John Candy, Chris Farley, Dom Deluise, Raymond Burr, Carol O Connor, Jackie Gleason, John Goodman, B.B. King, Redd Foxx, Pavarotti, Babe Ruth, President Roosevelt, President Taft, Orson Wells. Want me to continue the list? I can...
You're right, fat people have poor manners, low job performance, and poor life performance. | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:40:39 AM |
Being fat carries over into one's""""" traits, """"manners, """"job performances and"""" Life performances.
WOW!!!!
1. Traits: You're right here. I don't judge someone by their looks. I give a person a chance to show their personality, show their character, show their intelligence. I don't cut them to the quick if they are overweight, immediately thinking they have bad traits. But I always looked at that as a good thing...not a bad. My mistake.
BTW...does being thin mean you have no bad traits. Just wondering.
2. Manners: This is a good one. A "thin" woman expresses her opinion that fat people have bad traits, manners, has a poor job performance and poor life performance, and wants to bring up manners. Does this really need explaining??? LOL
3. Job Performance: I walk at least half of my day at my job. I complete all my work before my 40 work week, often being able to leave early. I get excellent evaluations. Great raises...above the average for employees. Thank God I'm overweight based on your logic!!
4. Life Performance: I have played softball, volleyball, up until I was 40...being overweight, one of the better more agressive players, I clean, I get my excersize, I have normal sleep habits, I have a GREAT sex life, I got out, have a blast, have many friends, ....what exactly are the "life performances" that suffer??
This subject is just too funny!!! Thanks for the laughs! | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:44:31 AM | Fat people are just lazy and don't get anywhere. But I'm sure glad nobody told that to Jim Belushi, John Candy, Chris Farley, Dom Deluise, Raymond Burr, Carol O Connor, Jackie Gleason, John Goodman, B.B. King, Redd Foxx, Pavarotti, Babe Ruth, President Roosevelt, President Taft, Orson Wells. Want me to continue the list? I can...
Don't forget Roseanne,Oprah,Emme,Liv tyler,Monique,Queen latifa ,Jennifer Hudson,and have you seen Tyra banks lately?Not exactly fat but definitely becoming curvier then ever.Not a skinny Minnie anymore. | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:53:59 AM | Depends on how much weight I suppose. 10 lbs might bother some. 100 lbs may not bother others. If you still find your spouse attractive and they can still engage in your previous activities then it won't matter. If looks are VERY important to you then it probably will matter.
Heck...tell me no women ever dumped or cheated on their hubbies who gained weight and lost their hair! lol. | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:55:25 AM | | Obviously you loved her to have married her. If not why not have her sign a pre-nup that includes a if you get fat clause. On the other hand how would you feel if she decided one day that you weren't the studly man she married and wanted to dump you for a slimmer trimmer type. Would you feel hurt??????????????????????? | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:58:28 AM | OP - what got into your corn flakes  Hmm, given the name "Loveawaits", if you truly have the heart that would stray because the love of your life gains weight, gains wrinkles, gains saggy boobs, gray hair/no hair, I guarantee that you will be waiting a LONG time for love.
It's not so much that people want to eat a box of cookies, or down a whole pizza in one sitting. Yes, those people (BOTH men & women) are out there. There are also certain medical conditions and drugs that can pack on the pounds. Just because someone is thin (by fashion/Hollyweird standards), doesn't guarantee them excellent health. Some of those "ideal" looking people have STD's; aids; heart problems; joint conditions, etc. Can't always judge a book by its cover.
I'll bottom line this for you OP. If you aren't attracted to someone, don't date them, and for God's sake, don't marry them! | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 8:59:39 AM | | When a relationship is based upon a love between two people that understand the concepts of patience, tolerance and acceptance there would never be a divorce. Try to remember WHY you married her in the first place. Hopefully its because of who she is, not what she looked like. | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 9:17:30 AM | Let us now have the ultimate test - let us Ask the men whether their ideal woman is very boney and thin - straight up and down - the proverbial rake -
Alternatively is she groosly overweight - replete with bulges - and constantly out of breath - and in common with all overweight women trying desparately straining to fit into a dress or pants two sizes to small.
No - The men are going to say that their ideal is somewhere in between?
While for many an hour glass figure is splendid, (together with good dress sense) | |
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| Does being/becoming overweight influence relationships?
Posted: 1/5/2008 9:29:46 AM | then lets ask the ladies out there...
Would you rather be with a man that is a little over weight with some love handles but has the personality of a prince OR....
An overbearing, condescening, rude, obnoxious, judgemental man that has the body of adonis?
My choice.. give me those love handles any day! | |
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